Pacifiers

[kleines]

I didn't want to hijack the other pacifier thread, so I started another one. What is the AP stance on pacis?
dumb, I know.. but I was curious. DS1 sucks his thumb so it was never an issue. When we are around the house, Willy often just uses the breast. Sometimes though, I need a break! Also the pacifier is the only way we can get anywhere in the car without screaming! yikes.

Can you recommend any "safe" pacis (non toxic materials)? We got a Soothie from MIL and DS seems to do okay with it, but I don't know what it is made of. I am going to check online right now. Any recommendations?

[Liam's Mum]

I don't think there is an AP stance on pacifiers, it's not a list of "thou shalts" and "thou shalt nots" IMHO (and I love this article on *gasp* another site about what AP IS: http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt...parenting.html) Maybe there is a MDC stance, I don't know.

Now some would argue it interferes with bf, but if you have a handle on when baby is hungry vs. needing to suck for comfort (and it is pretty hard to bf while driving!), I say, do what works for you and your baby. I guess there is also the argument that any artificial nipple use could also interfere with the contraceptive effect of bf, if you were relying on that.

Sorry can't give recos. DS1 had a Gerber Nuk that he gave up on his own at 18 mos, and he also bf until 2.5 with no confusion, but didn't Gerber get bought by Nestle, which might make them a big no-no for some.

[Banana731]

i dont know what the AP official stance is, but i know the sears' feelings are that, when used judiciously, they are okay(not great.)

we're not big paci people, but i tried to use one in the car(didn't work though.) i'd rather use a paci than let my baby scream. a carseat is an artifical intrusion into a baby's world, so maybe an artifical soother is an appropriate balancer. besides, a big part of AP is responding to you baby's cries or distress immediately to foster a trusting relationship, so letting a baby scream in a car seat is way less AP than a paci.

[DarcyWronk]

With my son I used a pacifier. I started trying to give it to him when he was 6 weeks old, but he didn't take it until he was 10 weeks old. I took it away at 10 months with no fuss - my timing was very lucky, I think. He is 2 1/2 and still breastfeeding.
I found the paci very useful in the car. Also, at night I found that he would sometimes sleep better with the paci - I could nurse him back to sleep and then slip the paci in when he was asleep if he was having a tough time sleeping. The paci was helpful in getting him to nap because he frequently needed a lot of calming to prepare for a nap.
My paci rules were/are:
- no paci when baby is up and around, playing (because if he needs soothing we can nurse and he probably should be taking a break from playtime if he needs soothing)
- no paci when baby is awake and content
- no paci when baby is showing hunger cues
- paci is always allowed in the car
- paci is allowed at bedtime and naptime, if needed
I tried to make my paci rules clear to others because I found that people wanted to pop it in his mouth for no good reason and I felt that him having the paci when he didn't need it made me less in touch with his needs.

[HeatherB]

Much agreement here... I believe a pacifier in the car is much more AP than not having one just for the sake of not having one. I also make rules about when it is used, specifically that it is only for when the baby is fussing, NOT ever to be used with a happy baby. Teaching this to the 3yo has been a little tricky, but we're getting there! If baby is hungry, it's time to eat - not have the pacifier. But there are, occasionally, times when I'm not available for one reason or another, and then I'd rather have the pacifier available.

I have the Gerber Natural Flex pacifiers with Judah. I chose these for a few reasons... One, I had the older style GentleFlex with Gabriel and he liked them and I liked the motion of them. (Iain refused them and accepted Avent.) Two, everything that touches baby is silicone, which is a safe material. And three, they're about the first thing I saw in the grocery when I went looking - a time when I went without DS, who woke up while I was out and was crying and crying with DH. At that point I decided it would be much better for DH to have a pacifier on hand than for me to be 15 minutes away with a sad baby at home!

I do sometimes feel we use it more than necessary, but there are also other times when I know it is a very good thing to have it available.

Oh, both of my older boys started refusing theirs around 5-6 months, so I never had to deal with taking it away.

[Jenlaana]

I didnt use one last time because everyone told me how evil they were. interferes with breastfeeding, makes it harder for them to sleep on their own (waking when the paci falls out) messes up how their teeth come in etc. To be honest, while that may happen *some* times, I think its minimal enough of a risk that I'm fine with them.

When I had DD1, I literally spent like 6 months attached to her via boob. 24/7 It was not that I had removed the pacifier, I just BECAME her pacifier, ya know? I'm all for breastfeeding on demand, truly, but with my kids, they would happily breastfeed for comfort as well as food, and while I love BFing most of the time, I dont think its practical or good for them to BF 24/7.

DD2 does not breastfeed nearly as well when I breastfeed too often for comfort. She ends up with lots of little snacks instead of a "good" meal, and doesnt ever get to the hindmilk. Plus, I kinda like having my boobs back...atleast for a couple hours at a time.

[ASusan]

Soothie is the brand recommended by my LC. I think it is made of silicone.

[kleines]

Thanks ladies! I think Soothie is silicone too, the gum drop brand seems to be silicone too. I like that they are one solid piece.

I did notice on Soothies website that they have vanilla scented pacis?!? WTH? I can't figure out why you would want that.

[blueridgewoman]

We use a silicone pacifier when all else fails, or in the car. Sometimes, dd just has a real need to suck and she gets upset if she's on the breast and nothing is coming out. So she gets the pacifier. She also gets it sometimes at night to get to sleep, and then I remove it as soon as she drops off. But she rarely gets it during the day- we find other ways of soothing her.

[mittendrin]

Originally Posted by Banana731

i dont know what the AP official stance is, but i know the sears' feelings are that, when used judiciously, they are okay(not great.)

we're not big paci people, but i tried to use one in the car(didn't work though.) i'd rather use a paci than let my baby scream. a carseat is an artifical intrusion into a baby's world, so maybe an artifical soother is an appropriate balancer. besides, a big part of AP is responding to you baby's cries or distress immediately to foster a trusting relationship, so letting a baby scream in a car seat is way less AP than a paci.

That was my thinking. I just got a paci for Niklas because he hates the carseat. Now I drive with one hand behind me a lot, lol, cause he spits it out sometimes. But it sure beats hearing him cry...: poor thing....

Ds1 had a paci til he ditched it when he turned 3. he only used them for nighttime and back then I didn't know any better. I think it messed with his latch and might be reason why he has a crossbite now, dunno.

I am not thinking about AP reasons when I say that I don't want my baby to have the pacifier - I am getting a bit annoyed by all the rules that some Ap parents have. I am a mom w/o label

[kosheng]

i totally agree with mittendren... the "rules" and labels are ridiculous.

i think that as a mom, we each need to trust our instincts. none of my other babies needed a paci, but reece likes the soothie when in his car seat. (and yes, i have the oh-so-comfortable one-arm-in-the-backseat posture too!) i just can't handle him being so miserable back there without this little innocuous thing.

each baby is different, and each situation is different. i really have very few absolutes anymore when it comes to baby-raising!

[orangecanoe]

We use a soothie w/ HJ on the recommendation of my LC. I have/had huge oversupply issues and OAL and it really helps his need for comfort sucking since he can be done eating in under 5 minutes! And with reflux, I have to be careful not to overfeed him and make him more miserable. I have a couple of the wubba nub horses w/ the soothie attached to keep myself from dropping the dang things---they sure can bounce!

[marlygf]

my dd has the same issue. When she wants to suck, she wants to suck. she doesn't want milk and my letdown seems to think it needs to happen whether she wants it or not. Sometimes I've gotten 3 letdowns in one feeding. It's a bit annoying for her.
She doesn't use it to go to sleep just in her fussy times in the evening and in the car I think you do what works best for you and your baby My first ds took one and overused it, my second ds didn't take one and this one uses it a little bit

[lilgsmommy]

Originally Posted by kleines

Thanks ladies! I think Soothie is silicone too, the gum drop brand seems to be silicone too. I like that they are one solid piece.

I did notice on Soothies website that they have vanilla scented pacis?!? WTH? I can't figure out why you would want that.

Our NICU has the vanilla ones as well as the regular ones.....some babies are soothed by the scent. They said they didnt use them very often, maybe with 1 baby a month, mainly for that little one who wasnt able to be held due to machines and stuff and need a little extra comfort.

[IfMamaAintHappy]

my older 3 wouldnt take a paci. My oldest learned on her own within her first week of life how to suck for comfort differently than sucking for milk, so she never got overfull from comfort nursing.

With my son, whatever paci he would use is the one we went with, so I cant help you on looking for brands. We are stuck with mam brand because its what he is used to and likes. Id have spent money on other, better, less toxic type brands if Id know beforehand, or thought he would even take a paci. I had 2 pacifiers, and he took to the mam and not the avent.

My paci rules are similar.. he is little, but if he is hoarking at me from eating too much but is still wanting to suck, he gets it when awake and happy... and always in the car, and always at nap and bedtime.

[wildgarden]

Originally Posted by marlygf

my dd has the same issue. When she wants to suck, she wants to suck. she doesn't want milk and my letdown seems to think it needs to happen whether she wants it or not. Sometimes I've gotten 3 letdowns in one feeding. It's a bit annoying for her.
She doesn't use it to go to sleep just in her fussy times in the evening and in the car I think you do what works best for you and your baby My first ds took one and overused it, my second ds didn't take one and this one uses it a little bit

Originally Posted by heatherfeather

We use a soothie w/ HJ on the recommendation of my LC. I have/had huge oversupply issues and OAL and it really helps his need for comfort sucking since he can be done eating in under 5 minutes! And with reflux, I have to be careful not to overfeed him and make him more miserable. I have a couple of the wubba nub horses w/ the soothie attached to keep myself from dropping the dang things---they sure can bounce!

For both of my DC this has been the case. I have multiple, powerful letdowns if they continue to nurse. I hate that I can't nurse for comfort...and am thankful for the paci!!!

[ashleyhaugh]

we use one... we use the playtex binky

[jenmarie]

I'm not opposed to using one (in the car/bed especially -- not so much when awake and alert), though I haven't had much luck with 'em.

My older DD never would take one - or a bottle. She only wanted the real thing to suck on, and she wanted it ALL the time. No wonder she was a total little buddha baby. Heck, her ROLLS had rolls.

Now my new DD will take a bottle of EBM, after fussing about it for a while. It's not easy, but I hope it'll get better with practice.

But as far as the pacifier goes? Not so much. She'll mouth it, and maybe suck a little bit on it, but as soon as I'm not holding it in? Out it goes, forcefully, and then she does NOT want it back.

I waited until at least 4 weeks with both girls. Maybe I should have tried sooner. Maybe DD2 will take it at some point if I keep trying.

So far I've tried a couple of different silicone ones with her and it's the same story with both types.

I don't want her on it all the time, but for in the car and when she wants to comfort suck all night long it would really be a big boon!

I'm going to follow this thread, though, and see what folks are saying.... thanks for posting it!

[Lookingup]

I really *wish* James would take a pacifier, and could care less about anyone's stance on it, lol. He really wants to suck when he's going to sleep. But he hates all the ones I've tried. I have oversupply and he has reflux, so I don't want to use the boob (he's not big on nursing to sleep anyway.) We're having some luck with him sucking on my pinky. Honestly though, he really wants to suck his thumb. He just can't get it into his mouth, poor guy.

[marlygf]

Originally Posted by bygones75

I really *wish* James would take a pacifier, and could care less about anyone's stance on it, lol. He really wants to suck when he's going to sleep. But he hates all the ones I've tried. I have oversupply and he has reflux, so I don't want to use the boob (he's not big on nursing to sleep anyway.) We're having some luck with him sucking on my pinky. Honestly though, he really wants to suck his thumb. He just can't get it into his mouth, poor guy.

Well, he'll certainly be happy when he can finally get control of his hands. My dd tries to suck on her fist but she gets pretty upset when it flings out of her mouth