Originally Posted by Banana731
a carseat is an artifical intrusion into a baby's world, so maybe an artifical soother is an appropriate balancer. besides, a big part of AP is responding to you baby's cries or distress immediately to foster a trusting relationship, so letting a baby scream in a car seat is way less AP than a paci.
Originally Posted by HeatherB
Much agreement here... I believe a pacifier in the car is much more AP than not having one just for the sake of not having one. I also make rules about when it is used, specifically that it is only for when the baby is fussing, NOT ever to be used with a happy baby. Teaching this to the 3yo has been a little tricky, but we're getting there!
This sums up my feelings on pacifiers (or soothers, or susses, as they're called around here). I even have a 3 yo who loves to try to give the soother... and then says "he doesn't need a bottle" and take it away... and then give it again... repeat ad infinitum.
I didn't use them with my first three, as I was really worried about nipple confusion (with my first) and had generally happy babies and a flexible schedule (with my second and third). I have a couple of soothers now for emergency use. One comes with us in the car. He's usually happy sucking my finger in the carseat (it's rare that I drive on my own with R, so I sit beside him most of the time) but, to be honest, I worry about germs, especially at this time of year (and I'm usually pretty laissez-faire when it comes to germs). I wash my hands constantly in the daytime, but when we're out and about, it's much harder, and I have a 3 yo whose nose is constantly running & needing wiping. Also, the kids copy what I do with R, and I don't want them randomly sticking their fingers in his mouth (I know at least one of them has a hard time remembering to wash his hands after using the bathroom). But, R often won't take it. And I have a personal dislike of them. I really do understand why people use them, but I just have a gut dislike of them, I'm not sure where it comes from. Before I bought any for R, my oldest thought they were "baby plugs" to stop the baby from making noise.
I've had oversupply issues with my first and fourth -- they were also the gassiest (I assume as a result of the extra milk) and fussiest. But I felt in those situations, it was important to keep trying to have them nurse for comfort, so my breasts would get with the programme and my supply would even out. And since I had problems starting breastfeeding with my first, I really didn't want to introduce artificial nipples. I popped the baby off (usually the baby did it himself) when I had a letdown while the baby was comfort nursing, let the milk dripped until it stopped (prefolds are handy for this), and then kept nursing. I think it also gave the baby a chance to learn the difference between nursing-to-get-milk and nursing-to-get-comfort, and eventually I didn't have to pop him off to let the milk drip because he wasn't triggering a let down when he didn't want one. That was a relief.
We've never dealt with reflux, though -- only one of my babies really spit up much at all (this baby burps long and loud, but it's just noise, no milk, except maybe once every few days). I can imagine I wouldn't want to just wait around for my breasts and baby to figure each other out if reflux were an issue.