My dd is pretty defiant and I know that her defiant nature is what is causing this behavior, but I need to do something to change this. At the beginning of the school year, I put money in her lunch account, telling her that if she wastes it on buying extra junk food, we'd not refill the account and she'd be responsible for bringing lunch from home. Well she decided rice krispy treats and soda were acceptable for lunch and spent more than the cost of a daily lunch on junk. Normally lunch is $2 a day and she was spending twice that on garbage and not eating real food. So, I followed through and did not refill her lunch account.
I began packing for her. For the first few days that was cool, but then she started complaining that the food I packed was disgusting (a sandwich, piece of fruit, yogurt....nothing disgusting). I asked her to tell me what she wanted so I could pack foods that she liked, but she just said "I don't know, something sweet." She was very vague, disrespectful, and shot down every idea I could come up with and refused to give me input on foods she liked.
Soooo, I stopped packing for her and she was told that she'd have to pack her own lunch. We have containers and BuiltNY lunch bags so she can take leftovers (they have a microwave at school) or she could choose to make a sandwich, or I would buy her those little progresso microwaveable soups. She loves wedding soup and ravioli, so I stocked up on that for her but she won't take them. She will, however, eat these things after school.
She refused to take lunch to school and I began putting the soups in her purse while she got ready in the morning but she'd take them out and put them back on the counter before leaving. These are foods I know she likes because she does eat them after school when she comes home starving.
Today I get a call from the cafeteria manager. Apparently she's telling them I won't give her lunch money and giving them a sob story. They even offered to send home reduced lunch form because they think I can't afford to feed her! She owes them money. I told them she didn't have my permission to run up a huge credit with them, and that I offer her food every single day and she refuses. I'm not paying the bill. They can put her in detention or refuse to give her lunch if they wish, but if she wants to run up a huge bill with the school against my wishes it will have to come out of her allowance and she'll have to find a way to pay them herself. If they are going to continually make the mistake of giving in to her when she has no lunch by choice, then they are going to have to be the ones to get on her case about paying.
Ugh...so I think I'm handling this correctly, yet she still flat out refuses every day to take a lunch. I don't get it.
I began packing for her. For the first few days that was cool, but then she started complaining that the food I packed was disgusting (a sandwich, piece of fruit, yogurt....nothing disgusting). I asked her to tell me what she wanted so I could pack foods that she liked, but she just said "I don't know, something sweet." She was very vague, disrespectful, and shot down every idea I could come up with and refused to give me input on foods she liked.
Soooo, I stopped packing for her and she was told that she'd have to pack her own lunch. We have containers and BuiltNY lunch bags so she can take leftovers (they have a microwave at school) or she could choose to make a sandwich, or I would buy her those little progresso microwaveable soups. She loves wedding soup and ravioli, so I stocked up on that for her but she won't take them. She will, however, eat these things after school.
She refused to take lunch to school and I began putting the soups in her purse while she got ready in the morning but she'd take them out and put them back on the counter before leaving. These are foods I know she likes because she does eat them after school when she comes home starving.
Today I get a call from the cafeteria manager. Apparently she's telling them I won't give her lunch money and giving them a sob story. They even offered to send home reduced lunch form because they think I can't afford to feed her! She owes them money. I told them she didn't have my permission to run up a huge credit with them, and that I offer her food every single day and she refuses. I'm not paying the bill. They can put her in detention or refuse to give her lunch if they wish, but if she wants to run up a huge bill with the school against my wishes it will have to come out of her allowance and she'll have to find a way to pay them herself. If they are going to continually make the mistake of giving in to her when she has no lunch by choice, then they are going to have to be the ones to get on her case about paying.
Ugh...so I think I'm handling this correctly, yet she still flat out refuses every day to take a lunch. I don't get it.
: In the produce section (where he should be selecting most of his foods) he told me the only fruit he wanted was passion fruit. Ummmmm... they don't have that at Safeway, sorry it's very exotic, and even if they did, they are very expensive and not very filling. But in general, he has very exotic tastes and unless he is allowed to eat things he likes (Indian food, mostly, which is quite high in protein and not something he can eat every day) he goes on a sort of boycott of all foods and refused to tell me what he wants to eat. So I buy what I think are healthy options for him, and then he is pissed every evening when it's time to pack his lunch, because "there's nothing I want".
