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In our 30s with Our First Babe - December - Page 18

post #341 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by acp View Post
:
My ped told me from week 1, that the cardinal rule is to never wake a sleeping baby.
My ped told me the complete opposite.

Not that we had to wake Sofie for a night feeding ... well, ever, but we did wake her during the day a few times. Maybe that's why she has such trouble sleeping long stretches.
post #342 of 528
Rachel, Sounds like a REALLY long night!
Good luck wtih getting what you need on DH's job offer. Sounds like it's been a frustrating process. Maybe (hopefully) they'll come back with something better in the formal offer?
If it helps at all, I LOVE Colorado. I would move there to live in a heartbeat if either DH or I could practice our careers there. I've never lived in C Springs, but have a number of friends who have and who enjoyed it (it's a bit different from the Boulder/Denver areas since it's an odd mix of crunchy liberal and religious right, but it's also a lower cost of living than Denver or Boulder). I'm a mountain girl at heart, and have loved the times I lived in Colorado in the past. I think it would be a great place to raise a child too, especially if you have any interest at all in nature, the outdoors, hiking, etc. So much in the way of natural beauty for kids to explore, which can be in pretty short supply in lots of other spots.
In fact, we'll be out there a week from tomorrow... We have a crazy travel schedule planned for the holidays - 5 days with DH's family in WVa, and then straight to Colorado to spend 5 days with my family. It sounded good at the time we made the plans, but I now think we were a bit insane, especially with the time changes and the looooong car trips between airport and house in both places when Willa HATES the car, and the abysmal sleep setup we'll have in WVa. Oh well. Hopefully it'll be fun too. Is anyone else traveling for the holidays?
post #343 of 528
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by nylecoj View Post
Also, should I be moving part of this to the Toddler forum since Sofie is a year?
Don't leave us! The newer mama's benefit from your wisdom!

That being said, if you feel like YOU need to move on (so that you can get some advice rather than always be doling it out) I will try not to be offended (although you will have to promise to visit). Did Katreena ever start a thread for 30 something first time mama's in the toddler forum?
post #344 of 528
Thread Starter 
I am not a post whore

BUT
I forgot to say that our ped said that Benjamin has a heart murmur at his 2 month appt. She did not seem overly concerned. She said that many babes have them and that most of them resolve by themselves or are benign.
post #345 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by nylecoj View Post

Julia -
Isn't Knocked Up fabulous?! I didn't even realize how AP it was until I read some post here about the director being all AP and stuff. I just figured it was normal to go into a bathtub to help with contractions. Hah.
Also, you will get more movie time as the babe gets older. We are finally able to have ~2 hours of time alone at night while dd sleeps. I'm betting most people get that way before a year.
Hah! I never realized that either. Everything she did seemed so normal, that it never occurred to me (as I guess it should have) that the majority of folks don't go into a bath when labor starts. I didn't realize Judd Apatow was AP. I did like that they showed an unmedicated birth - even though if I remember correctly she was asking for drugs by the end - since it's SO rare that they show that in media portrayals. I also liked that it was a very "real" seeming birth, IYKWIM - there was actually a shot of the baby crowning. Definitely not something you see in most movies that have a birth in them!

I find that watching movies at home has actually become a major source of entertainment for us now. It helps, obviously, that Willa goes to bed by 7, but because she does, we have a good 2-4 hours (depending how late we decide to stay up.... realizing that it means forgoing sleep we could be having...) of adult time to have a real dinner, watch a DVD, read a book, etc. It's only been in the last couple months that that's evolved, and it's made me feel SO much more human. DH and I are both movie buffs, and we miss going out to the theater together - we've both managed to see a small handful of films since Willa was born on our own or with friends, but not together - but yay for Netflix!
Unfortunately, I don't feel like watching a movie is doable when she's awake. She's another one who's mesmerized by the TV (what is it about that box that traps them in so young???). I'm definitely not the perfect mama, and I'm sure I'll use it from time to time (and already have) when I need to get something done and it's the only thing that will hold her attention, but I don't want to fall into too many bad habits now if i can avoid them. Which means that watching TV or DVDs, at this point, pretty much has to be done while she's sleeping. Oh well...
post #346 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by acp View Post
Hah! I never realized that either. Everything she did seemed so normal, that it never occurred to me (as I guess it should have) that the majority of folks don't go into a bath when labor starts. I didn't realize Judd Apatow was AP. I did like that they showed an unmedicated birth - even though if I remember correctly she was asking for drugs by the end - since it's SO rare that they show that in media portrayals. I also liked that it was a very "real" seeming birth, IYKWIM - there was actually a shot of the baby crowning. Definitely not something you see in most movies that have a birth in them!

I find that watching movies at home has actually become a major source of entertainment for us now.
That's funny, I thought when I was watching it, "Wow, she's handling these contractions quite well naturally" and of course she asked for drugs at the end... if I'd seen this before I went through labor I'd have rolled my eyes at that point and thought "wow they just can't bring themselves to show a natural labor where some woman doesn't beg for drugs", but now that I've done it and I was also begging for drugs... seems realistic! Hehe

I think we'll be watching more Netflix now due to the TV writers' strike. I'm a union member myself (musicians' union) and I stand behind them, but I'm also very sad that my tv season is coming to a close just when I spend so many hours at home. I may have to start... GASP... reading books! Ack! Only problem with Netflix is that DH and I never agree on what movies to watch. He likes ones that get good reviews, or so he says... but his faves are typical smash-em-up guy flicks, and if zombies are in the plotline, so much the better. In fact, if DeNiro starred in a zombie movie, DH would be in heaven.

Thx for the advice about whether to wake O for feedings... I hope this is the beginning of him figuring out day/night, because once DH goes back to work next week, I won't be able to sleep through the 3 a.m. "cranky shift" that DH usually takes. Man it's been nice to sleep for some longer stretches. Whew.
post #347 of 528
Rachel... Man you guys are going through a lot. Hang in there! Poor poor thing.
post #348 of 528
Rachel, one more thing... ped told us in the hospital Ollie had a slight murmur too, but it would probably resolve itself in time. Not sure what age they expect that to happen, just thought I'd share.

Also, and I know they're pets and not kids, but both my dog and cat, at different times, had heart murmurs show up when they were sick/stressed/ in the hospital (I'll spare you the long stories) and later when they were better, no murmur could be detected. May be completely unrelated, but I thought of that cuz maybe your sweet child is under some stress cuz of all the medical stuff and this will resolve in time, when it all passes, or he will outgrow it.

But you're the one with the medical background, I could be full of it... just sharing my experience.

I, however, have a murmur that's NOT going away... I take heart (no pun intended) in knowing that it's (supposedly) harmless.
post #349 of 528
Oh, wow...I had no idea that this group even existed!! How funny! My name is Aileen, and I've been here a while...since I was pregnant with Hannah, who was born April 1st 2007. I'm 32, and feeling the pressure to give her a brother or sister soon. Just wanted to stop in and say 'Hi!'
post #350 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grace24 View Post

Ollie went for almost 7 hours without eating last night! I started his last feeding at 12:15 a.m. and afterwards he was fussy so DH took him downstairs to let me sleep, but when he brought him back at 3:30 he was passed out so we decided not to wake him (who knows how long he'll be awake), and then he didn't wake up to eat til after 7! Ack! I was grateful for the sleep but if this continues it could affect my supply, right? Should I be letting him do that? Are breastfeeding babies supposed to go that long... I mean I know the nurse told me to BF on demand at night but that's a long, long time. Hmm... thoughts?
I would say that until he's gaining well and steadily; don't let him go more than 3 hours without eating... Once that's all worked out you can let him sleep, though! I see I'm alone in that suggestion, but since he's gaining so slowly I'd worry until he is doing that a little better... If I just get Isabella awake enough to eat and then snuggle her back to sleep she never really wakes up all the way.
post #351 of 528
Sooo sorry Rachel - I wish you were closer so I could offer some in person support. I hope that they up the offer - can you look at metrolist in that area to see what houses seem to go for? Maybe cost of living isn't bad. I'm sure compared to DC just about anywhere would seem cheap!
post #352 of 528
Oh good, I don't really want to leave here, I'm just starting to know people's names! I haven't even really checked the Toddler forum because I suppose I am in denial that I have a toddler now.

Welcome, Hannah! We are considering adding another baby to the mix too, but I am honestly really happy with things right now. I feel like we just got it all figured out and are into a really nice rhythm. I'm not sure I want to shake it up just yet and try to do pregnancy with a daughter who still really needs mommy. Oh, and yeah, I'm 32 also, turning 33 in May. Dh thinks we should move sooner rather than later. We'll see.

I used to be a big movie buff too (majored in Film at UCSC) but then we had dd and now we hardly ever see movies. Boo. For the longest time she would wake up every 45 minutes and it just killed my desire to watch them. I hate being interrupted in a movie. We've been watching Battle Star Galactica on DVD and I really like it. We like stuff like Dexter, Big Love, Weeds, BSG, etc.

The writers strike sucks ... I mean, I understand, but I miss watching Brothers and Sisters.

And this is probably very naughty of me, but I sort of wish dd had ANY interest in tv. She used to sort of watch the colors move, and once in a while she'll go up to it and talk back to it, but mostly not interested at all. I really want to take her to see a film in a theater but she's just too young.
post #353 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by nylecoj View Post
We've been watching Battle Star Galactica on DVD and I really like it. We like stuff like Dexter, Big Love, Weeds, BSG, etc.
I like BSG too! And I'm generally not a sci-fi person. I generally watch TV via DVD these days in any case, so the writer's strike isn't upsetting my own TV viewing much. But I hope it doesn't prematurely end Lost's next season! Based on the other stuff you like, you should check out Deadwood and the Wire via DVD - two of the best-written TV shows I've ever seen. The Wire, especially, is amazing. Takes a few episodes to get into, but then it's an incredible exploration of the life of a city (Baltimore) and the roots of inner-city issues like poverty, drugs, dying unions, corruption, poor education, etc.

As for the toddler forum... I'd say there's a pretty long gray area when your kid is both a baby AND a toddler . Is she walking now?

As for thinking about a brother or sister for Willa... at this point it's hard for me to wrap my brain just around the idea that I'm a mother to ONE kid! However, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I've thought about it. And due to a combination of factors - my age, the fact that I like the idea of siblings being close in age and us getting through the early infant diaper-wearing years, quicker - I'd kind of like to have two kids spaced fairly close if we can. If we wanted them two years apart, that would mean trying next summer. Convincing DH is going to be an uphill battle, though. He says at least 3-4 years apart sounds good, and I don't think he realizes, in an internalized way, that there's a significant amount of time between when we start trying for the baby and when the baby actually arrives on our doorstep. Oh well. Not a conversation we need to have at this point, definitely. I'd be pretty shocked and a bit horrified if i were to become pregnant again tomorrow.
Do others here want more than one child eventually, or do you think your family is now complete?
post #354 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by nylecoj View Post

I used to be a big movie buff too (majored in Film at UCSC) but then we had dd and now we hardly ever see movies. .
You can't leave.

I went to UCSC too!!! How funny. When were you there? (Not that we would have met - I was so focused on Politics stuff then.) I miss Santa Cruz so much.

I know I want one more, but with the PROM and everything I don't know if we will. DH was sure this was it when I was so sick at the beginning of the pregnancy, so we'll see. I'm hoping as she gets older he'll forget how hard it was and will be open to another one. I was an only child, but did great because I had a lot of cousins around. DD won't have that - obviously I don't have any siblings and DH's are in Peru!
post #355 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by veganone View Post
I would say that until he's gaining well and steadily; don't let him go more than 3 hours without eating... Once that's all worked out you can let him sleep, though! I see I'm alone in that suggestion, but since he's gaining so slowly I'd worry until he is doing that a little better... If I just get Isabella awake enough to eat and then snuggle her back to sleep she never really wakes up all the way.
Lucien was 5 pounds even when he came home, so we had to do the same thing. Like Elizabeth, I found that if I just woke him up enough to eat, then snuggled him back down, he never really got spun up and would just suck it down and zonk again.

It seems to have worked as a strategy- even though he had a setback and lost a pound a month ago, he's now up to 16 pounds @ 5 months. Oink!
post #356 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by preemiemamarach View Post

It seems to have worked as a strategy- even though he had a setback and lost a pound a month ago, he's now up to 16 pounds @ 5 months. Oink!
Wow - he's beating Isabella!!! She's 11 lsb 12 oz and will be 4 months (16 weeks) next week... I don't think we'll be gaining 3 lbs in the next month and a week! She was 5 lbs 4 oz when we left the hosptial.
post #357 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by veganone View Post
I would say that until he's gaining well and steadily; don't let him go more than 3 hours without eating... Once that's all worked out you can let him sleep, though! I see I'm alone in that suggestion, but since he's gaining so slowly I'd worry until he is doing that a little better... If I just get Isabella awake enough to eat and then snuggle her back to sleep she never really wakes up all the way.

that's what i did until dd reached 8 lbs. then i let 'er sleep.
post #358 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by veganone View Post
Sooo sorry Rachel - I wish you were closer so I could offer some in person support. I hope that they up the offer - can you look at metrolist in that area to see what houses seem to go for? Maybe cost of living isn't bad. I'm sure compared to DC just about anywhere would seem cheap!

except manhattan. bad day on the mortgage front.
post #359 of 528
Quote:
Originally Posted by preemiemamarach View Post

It seems to have worked as a strategy- even though he had a setback and lost a pound a month ago, he's now up to 16 pounds @ 5 months. Oink!
wow! dd wads full term but today weighed in at 13 lbs 12 oz at 4 mos
post #360 of 528
Julia, your supply will be fine. Maya often goes 5 hours during her first stretch at night, and still nurses every 2 hour during the day no problem. Glad your little man got some good sleep! (oh, and I've done the dream feed too, when I want to nurse Maya before I leave for work but she's still sleeping. She barely wakes up and passes right back out, so you could try that also).

Rachel, so sorry for your trials at the hospital all night. Yuck! And hopefully your hubby will get some better numbers to make it more do-able for you guys.

We saw Knocked Up sometime over the summer, when I was nice and pregnant. I loved it!
Quote:
I also liked that it was a very "real" seeming birth, IYKWIM - there was actually a shot of the baby crowning. Definitely not something you see in most movies that have a birth in them!
Although it was a bit unrealistic that the main character managed to get a full waxing done before the birth, huh??

Welcome Aileen! Come back and hang out with us when you have time!

Re: more kids. I think we'll try again in a couple years, when Maya's around 2. I have this irrational fear of hitting age 35 and immediately being considered "higher risk" or something. Although, I found out when Maya was born that I have this weird antibody in my blood that could only be caused by being exposed to someone else's blood -- i.e. through miscarriage/pregnancy or a transfusion. I had a miscarriage before Maya, but it was very early, before a heartbeat, so could that have been it? I didn't have any bleeding with Maya, so I don't know. Anyway, this condition means I have to be followed by a perinatologist in my next pregnancy anyhow. Blah. I'm going to miss my midwives so much! Anyway, I'm just babbling.
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