In our 30s with Our First Babe - December - Page 26

[preemiemamarach]

Elizabeth- so sorry about the continued breast woes! I really hope this new doc is able to help. You're such an awesome mama for being this dedicated to BF through all of this! Think about how many mamas would have thrown in the towel after just a day of what you've been suffering through, KWIM?

You're doing a fantastic job!

[Grace24]

Well our babysitter never came! Just didn't show. : So it looks like it's just me next week. I got spoiled with Paul being home for so long and then with Mom being here, now it's just all me. .....sigh.... I'll never sleep again....

[rock_dr]

Julia - whoa, $17/hr and she doesn't even show up?? I hope you find someone soon...

This may sound weird but I am ready to go back to work! Our dual nannies start next week and I am kind of looking forward to the routine. I have to start teaching again though, am a little afraid of that.

[~minnow~]

Hello!

A quick post to say will my hair EVER STOP FALLING OUT? I'm in no danger of going bald as I have the thickest hair ever, but you should see the GIANT hairballs after each shower... the tumbleweeds of my hair around the house... the hair always curled around the baby's little fingers... I got it cut above my shoulders but obviously that was not short enough. Anyone else having this problem? CJ, when you cut your hair did it stop falling out?

We had a very fussy Christmas -- teething, we think? -- and were double glad not to have gone anywhere, even though we're totally in hot water with MIL and SIL now. Also, baby didn't poop for 5 days, but was in a great mood after she did! Also: I have never been skiing. Ever. Except for water. And am jealous.

I'm so impressed by the commitment of all you mamas with feeding issues! You rock! Also, you help me to be SLIGHTLY less whiney about my mundanely sore nipples.

[acp]

Originally Posted by ~minnow~

Also, baby didn't poop for 5 days, but was in a great mood after she did!

Man, we're having the opposite issue here. For the last two weeks, Willa has been pooping 7-8 times a day, sometimes more, including in the middle of the night. It's hard to remember the last time I changed a diaper that was just wet, not poopy. As a result, she got her first bad diaper rash, though it seems to be clearing up now. We've stopped doing any solid foods since we thought that might be contributing, but it's still going on.... Guess we just have a poop machine! I'm looking forward to her getting back to a more normal 1-3 poops a day, though....

[PiePie]

i want to brag that i signed up for a week (free) gym membership. now to get there!

julia, omg i hate that babysitter for standing you up! we are in desperate need of some babysitting here too.

[nylecoj]

Originally Posted by Grace24

Nylecoj... you do Bikram too? Are there classes near you? I am in love with that yoga, it helped me so much when my body felt so broken down from old injuries that I couldn't do any other exercise... when I'm not doing it I have to take ibuprofen for my back all the time. Did you know Bikram now has an advanced series? They teach it at my old studio, but you have to be able to do every expression of every pose in the original series to be admitted, so I have to work on my standing head-to-knee (I look down at my knee and just fall over), and toe stand which is hard cuz I have bad knees and toes. Sigh... maybe someday...

I haven't gone to classes in probably 2 years.

I was doing the poses for a couple of months after dd was born, but then sleep deprivation kicked in bad-like and I'm just starting to feel like getting back into it again.

My back and neck hurt every day though and I always feel so much better doing it, even if it's just practicing the poses at home. I cannot do the first part of toe stand (blanking on what it's called) because one my hips is really tight and just will not open up.

That advanced series sounds really neat. Someday I'd like to get my sheeit together and take a weekend retreat. They do have classes here too, about 15 minutes away from me ....

I need to start going again.

Also, I can't believe your babysitter didn't show up! Bad Bad Sitter!!!

Elizabeth -I'm so glad to hear about your NP. She sounds wonderful!

Minnow - You are funny. Cutting my hair made no difference whatsoever with it falling out. Also, dd went from pooping like 8 times a day to not going for 6 days without any warning on a camping trip. It slowly regulated after that, but it was very weird at first.

UGH. She is screaming right now. I'd better get upstairs and offer her some boobie.

[preemiemamarach]

Julia- that sitter sucks! I worry about the same thing happening- living around here has totally eroded my trust in people (I'm a southern girl by birth and upbringing).

We should definitely try to get together for coffee sometime- I actually work in ballston, but I'm putting in my 2 weeks' notice Thursday. Yay! We're moving to CO at the end of the month, but I'd love to try to meet before then.

Speaking of CO- acp, I know you're from that area (those posts were amillion years ago, and life has been a mess here)- but which part? DH is working on Ft. Carson, and we're hoping to rent a house further out around Divide/Woodland Park. He doesn't want to live too close to the base, as he hates military towns (after being stuck in them while he was in the military).

Any good colorado advice would be most welcome!!

So- we decided to take the plunge. We're going to be living off of my husband's income at first, and hopefully for a while. It'll take some convincing to get him to sign on to me being a SAHM for anything beyond RSV season, but I think I can make the numbers work. If not, I'm going to try to get something either part- time, or a WAH job doing case management or utilization review (I'm an RN).

Life with Lucien has been a bit rough. Friday before Christmas, we had another followup at the pediatrician, and saw a new doctor. He decided Lucien's ears looked fine, but his severe torticollis had reappeared, and he still had a fever. This new doc freaked a bit and sent us to the hospital for a stat ultrasound of DS's neck and more bloodwork. I'll spare you the details, but we were there all day and lots of screaming was involved.

The reason he freaked out, I think, is that he was worried there might be a tumor in DS's neck causing the fever and head tilt, along with his feeding difficulties. He never said this, but that's what I gathered from the ordered tests. We found that he has 8 enlarged lymph nodes now (instead of the 1 that the CT a few weeks ago showed), and his labs were relatively normal. Dunno if I mentioned this before, but one of his immunology labs came back abnormal, so it's looking like his immune system could be the culprit in all of this. Whether it's an actual immunodeficiency or just another result of prematurity has yet to be seen. I have a follow-up with the immunologist on the 7th, which the regular pedi is routinely calling to make sure I know about. I'm a mite worried about lymphoma, but his white count isn't nearly low enough.

His anemia is getting worse, which prompted me to start giving him cereal, which I swore I'd never do. But if ever a kid was to benefit from it, it's him. The only good thing about the stuff is that it's iron-fortified. We're doing the disgusting poly-vi-sol with iron, too, but he manages to spew that out every time, and won't take a thing if I mix it in something. I'd love to do the more natural BLW, but it's not in the cards for us right now, I think.

Anyway- with a week off from day care, he's been feeling better, at least. He still has the torticollis, but the only thing left (and this will probably happen next week) is putting him in the hospital to start over finding out what's wrong. Ugh. Lucky for me that I'm giving notice at my job, as missing that last day before Christmas infuriated my boss. (she didn't even ask why we had to take him to the hospital. lovely.) Oh, we did 3 days of IM antibiotics, which didn't clear up the infection- it just gave him diarrhea (12 times a day, what fun).

I'm working tomorrow, although I expect they'll let us out early. DH is staying home to take DS to his follow-up appointment (let's hope they don't send him straight to the hospital). I'm tired, I hate my stupid breast pump, and I find myself getting frustrated with DS sometimes- I'm hardcore stressing about moving with him, especially the idea of flying with his ear issues and infection susceptibility. At least he's eating more, although we used the last of our frozen stash and may need to dip into a little formula tomorrow (if he'll even take it, which I doubt).

I *so* love being his mama, I really do. But I'm also really, really tired.

Sorry to pop in and rant so much, y'all.

[nikkihoi]

Oh! Rachel! s s s

[Grace24]

Rachel, my goodness! How very scary and frustrating and sad. I'll PM you my phone number and if and when you get a chance please call, and if there's anything I can do to help, since I'm in the area, please ask! Congrats on giving 2 weeks notice, how cool Your boss sounds lovely

Lane... my Bradley teacher told me her babe didn't poop for 17 days once, she freaked out but the docs were like, no biggie ??

So I was on deck again last night and took over DH's normal job of putting Ollie to bed. I suck at it. It seems like the only way he'll go to bed for any length of time is if he has a good long cry first, and I keep soothing him and nursing him all night so he doesn't cry, so when I put him to bed then he wakes up every hour or two all night, so that by 3:30 a.m. I was shaking DH awake, crying, saying "I can't do this". Man I suck. I can't even handle one night putting him to bed. But now I'm reading all these things about how babies NEED to cry and I should just hold him while he cries and let him get it out, but I'm not sure what's worse... waking up constantly or listening to him scream for 20 minutes at a time. Is this normal? Jeez!

Yes it sucks about the sitter, I think I'll give my friend Catherine a call. She has an au pair (ours doesn't come for two months) who is willing to do extra babysitting, except I'd have to bring him to her house. Maybe she'd let me bring him and then take a nap at her house? I think I'll ask if we can't find anyone else. I'm so sleep deprived and I don't hold up well like this... I get very cranky! I mean beyond cranky.. non-functioning, I-can't-do-this cranky. Bah.

[rock_dr]

lane - my hair is still falling out even after the cut, but it seems to be more evenly distributed (I was getting bald spots around my temples from pulling my hair back in a pony tail all the time - they seem to be growing back (unfortunately, with gray hair)).

rachel and julia and elizabeth

[PiePie]

Originally Posted by Grace24

So I was on deck again last night and took over DH's normal job of putting Ollie to bed. I suck at it. It seems like the only way he'll go to bed for any length of time is if he has a good long cry first, and I keep soothing him and nursing him all night so he doesn't cry, so when I put him to bed then he wakes up every hour or two all night, so that by 3:30 a.m. I was shaking DH awake, crying, saying "I can't do this". Man I suck. I can't even handle one night putting him to bed. But now I'm reading all these things about how babies NEED to cry and I should just hold him while he cries and let him get it out, but I'm not sure what's worse... waking up constantly or listening to him scream for 20 minutes at a time. Is this normal? Jeez!

Yes it sucks about the sitter, I think I'll give my friend Catherine a call. She has an au pair (ours doesn't come for two months) who is willing to do extra babysitting, except I'd have to bring him to her house. Maybe she'd let me bring him and then take a nap at her house? I think I'll ask if we can't find anyone else. I'm so sleep deprived and I don't hold up well like this... I get very cranky! I mean beyond cranky.. non-functioning, I-can't-do-this cranky. Bah.

Julia, a big hug to you. i am so friggin' tired today too. dd nursed like all night. you will get better at it. when dh first went back to work, i thought i sucked at soothing -- nursing was like my only technique (ok, i'm exagerating some, but only a little). i got better at it and within a week i had my own tricks. BTW, i am looking for a sitter and $17 is what i might have to pay , at least until the colleges come back into session.

[PiePie]

rachel, i'm hoping your ds doesn't get hospitalized. have you considered tapping other mamas for ebm? i got several bags worth from a friend/acquaintance from a mama i met through my BFing support group. she pumped to relieve engorgement but now her ds won't take a bottle, and she didn't want her milk wasted. i know her well enough to know that she doesn't have hiv (they wouldn't have let her nurse in the hosp where she gave birth without a negative hiv test per nys law) so i'm okay with sharing. anyway that might be better for his immune system than formula. or is he on special prescription formula? i totally feel you on hating the pump. i don't pump as much as you do and i hate it so i cannot imagine the multiples of hatred you must be feeling!!

[PiePie]

elizabeth, please check in and let us know how you are doing!

[Grace24]

Have an appt with a different sitter tomorrow. She seems a lot more professional and promising... I have a feeling she'll show up at least! So strange and scary thinking of leaving my baby with a stranger from the web even with references... and even though I'll be home... that's a huge trust. Wow.

So now that my mom's gone I've had a little time to process this... I'm alarmed by some things I've observed the last couple of visits with her. She seems to be getting a little disoriented and her memory isn't great. It scares me because she's only 67 and her mother had the same issue, early senility. And in the back of my mind, I think god is that my heritage? I only have 30 years left to use my brain before I start losing everything and use three things of cream at a time in my coffee and can't remember that I already told someone the same story twice? Yikes. I know that's neither here nor there but it alarms me that it seems to be progressing. I don't have the guts to tell her what I'm observing... she kind of knows and will make comments like "I'm losing my mind" and stuff and I'll just say things like, "Well it's easy to lose stuff when you're not in your own house, etc." I don't have the heart to tell her! Sigh...I know this has nothing to do with babies, sorry... just venting, yet again...

[PiePie]

julia, i too am dealing with old mom stuff. my mom is only 65 but acts like she is much older. i think of myself as with it at 65 -- working full time, globe trotting, etc. she walks with a cane -- she had knee replacement surgery and didn't follow with her physical therapy -- i know i shouldn't blame her for her disability but really couldn't she have prioritized the rehab? and she may have epilepsy and the meds for it really knock her out. and she has a pacemaker for a condition that may have been a misdiagnosis (may have really been epilepsy). so she is terrified of blacking out and generally with it. she doesn't want to be left alone with dd. at least she isn't overestimating her abilities (which would be a whole otehr problem) but i was kinda thinking she could do a little babysitting, yk? i feel so jealous of my new mama acquaintance/friend whose mom visited for a month and they got along great and her mama watched her babe all the time and was totally cool and perfect with him. ah well. i guess we've all got our crosses to bear. but seeing my mom really pushed me to exercise more. one cause of osteoarthritis can be failure to exercise, and my mom certainly stopped that after she had #2. not me, i vow. altho when i went to african dance class yesterday for all of 55 minutes i felt such GUILT about leaving her (which may be transferance of my working mama guilt? ) and i missed her so much, altho i also kept picturing her watching me so as to inspire myself to do the moves better.

[~minnow~]

Originally Posted by preemiemamarach

So- we decided to take the plunge. We're going to be living off of my husband's income at first, and hopefully for a while.

Congratulations about this! And a huge hug about everything else. I also personally know mamas who have donated "extra" milk every week to other mamas who need some. (And they've been thrilled to do it.) Might be something to look into.

Jocelyn and Amanda -- Ada was a 7 times per day pooper before she all of the sudden switched to being a once a day girl, or twice, or skip a day. The five days in a row was freaky, but I kept reminding myself and DH that it can be normal to go up to a week or even 12 days at this age. (However 17 days would REALLY wig me out. How big was THAT blowout? Also, it would be weird to go BACK to 7 times a day now.)

Pie and Julia -- Wow and hugs about your moms. I'm very nervous about that. My grandmother has advanced Alzheimers (although I hadn't thought about me getting it... great). But I think a LOT about my parents getting old. It's even more... charged b/c I have had a lot of tension with my mom. It's weird to think of having to take care of her.

I wish I had more time to exercise/do yoga, too. I did a 6 wk postnatal yoga class, which was great except that it was during Ada's morning nap time so she was FUSSY so I didn't get to do much of it.

Nostalgic interlude: New Year's. We've been invited to a friend's house but they don't want to start till late. Maybe I'll pop in and have some champagne but then I'll come home and sing the baby to sleep. Last year we had a great time, dressed up and tipsy stumbling up the street from party to party in fancy shoes and a sling because, oh yeah, I broke my elbow a year ago. And also? The ovulation that was to become the zygote that was to become Adelaide was just about to happen, any minute. So I don't mind staying home. It's cool to remember. I was on the brink of my biggest wish! The preg. thread just got the first mama due in September, a YEAR after I was due. Wow. So I guess my "pregnancy year" is over. In 2008, I have to be something else.

Cheers, y'all. May 2008 bring us each our NEXT biggest wishes!

[veganone]

Pie - I'm okay - thanks for checking in, though!!! I'm still upset about everything, but I'm hanging in there. DD's been pretty demanding lately, so I haven't had computer time really. Mom is here and is holding her right now...

Still healing - no word yet on the culture. Saw a DC today who was recommended who sees food reactions in me, which he thinks is causing DD's food reactions so he is going to work on that and is hoping that getting that straightened out will allow my immune system to focus on my boobs like it's supposed to.

Went back on soy Thursday evening and had blood in her poop last night. Off again, and somehow today it looks pretty good. Yellow and seedy even if there is mucous. So, not sure if it was the soy or what before. I was so hoping for no change with the soy so I could EAT again. I'll try eggs next once she looks good for another day or two - I need protein.

Formula - The DC mentioned that you can make formula at home based on coconut milk, which would be hypoallergenic. Maybe that's something Rachel and Dee could look into? I can try to get the recipe if you need.

Rachel - I'm so, so sorry that Lucien is still so sick. I so wish I could do something - I feel awful for both of you... How scary, too. I hope that they can figure out what's wrong without hospitalizing him. I totally get hating the pump, too. I HATED mine when we were triple feeding. If you need to supplement that would get him iron, too, right? I'm glad you guys are going to be able to move so you can stay home, though. That will make both of you feel better in the long-term I'm sure. I will pray for him.

Julia - Sleep, yeah. I can get DD to bed, but ONLY if I sleep with her. At night even on me won't work. Nursing down is working lately, but for naps I have to pretty much just wear her. My mom is trying to get her down now and she's crying - I'll go step in in a minute, but at work I won't be able to!!! That bothers me. DH can't get her down either. But, someday I will need her to sleep without me laying there with her!!! I can't even sneak out of bed to go to the bathroom without her waking up.

Hair - When did those of you with hair issues have it start? Mine's still okay, but I am scared about it falling out!

Mom stuff - mine is stressing me out, too. She's 69 and looks great, but is definitely not mentally where she was even a few years ago. It worries me, too. I can't say anything and she doesn't see it at all. Even with DD - I told her this morning that "sshhh"ing works well for her when you're trying to get her to calm down or fall asleep and I had to go in there and remind her just now to try that. And gave her a pacifier, too, since that didn't occur to her either. She tends to want to sit with her on her lap, but that's not exactly what DD wants to do all day! I won't even mention the driving, but I will say I'm NOT putting a car seat base in her car so that she can't drive with her...

[rock_dr]

uh oh.

I hope I'm just being paranoid, but my right breast HURTS all of a sudden. It's not engorged, it's not a single lump, it's the whole thing, just tender.

I've been sick too, but I'm pretty sure it really is a cold.

please tell me this isn't mastitis?

[rock_dr]

bump.

are you guys all off doing exciting things this nye? :

elizabeth - noticeable hairloss started at ~5 months for me...