It's been a loooong bloody month. I'm really, really hoping December will be better. Wednesday I have a meeting to get our food stamps reinstated-- please, please, PLEASE think good thoughts at this. If it goes well, I will not only go grocery shopping like a crazed woman but I will go to the health food store and buy myself some flax seed oil and hopefully get my brain back in order.
: I am so tired of feeding the kids eggs all the time...
: And I'm really looking forward to buying a loaf or two of 12 grain bread.
: I guess it's kind of weird that I think of that as a luxury that we can "afford" when we have the food stamps, but... well, I'm just so tired of the Great Value sandwich wheat.
I have no idea how I'd cope with having to find gluten-free breads...
s Anyway, those are the things I look forward to most-- 12 grain bread, flax seed oil, and... oatmeal!
Thystle-- I appreciate that list... I have to say, though, that I laughed because it really made me think of Fight Club and I could hear the words, "You're not your f****** khakis."
Nature-- Your friend was a twit, but I feel a lot of pity for her... It sounds to me as though things are a heck of a lot worse than she cares to admit.
Something to improve myself this month... Hm. I don't know. I looked at one of those mini-stepper machines at WallyWorld last week. They're only about $40, and I'd love to be able to do something semi-physical while I'm, say, online or whatever. If i could set up a high table or something and step while I play my game, adding weights to my ankles and wrists when I got to be less of a wuss...
I suppose the third trimester is a weird time to be thinking of such things, though.
I'd really like to get in shape after this baby is born, though. Do a cleanse and such... I've got this mad idea that I'm going to find my waist before my 35th birthday (I just turned 30).
This month, though, I have no idea. The flax seed oil will help, I think... so I guess there's that. Try to take care of my brain, my greatest asset (sadly atrophied and overworked
), and go from there.
Things to be greatful for:
1. People who want to help.
Asking for help is hard. Heck, admitting that you *need* help is hard, even for someone like myself who was born into poverty. I'm always amazed to discover anew that people really do want to help, and that they want to do it without passing judgement on you and making you feel like crap.
: It's so, so nice to be able to talk about things like this and to know that the women reading *get it* and that people want to help and listen. It's seriously huge.
2. Lantus, yes again. (
) The girls are sick, mike and I have had colds as well. As those of you who are living with diabetes/diabetics know, illness of any kind wreaks havoc on your blood sugar. Yeah, mike's still a man, and men are total wusses when they're sick, but the last time mike was sick we didn't have Lantus in the house and he was so miserable... it took forever for him to get better and he never stopped whining. This time he was able to recover from his cold in just over a week, and he was SO much less whiny, and asked me to thank the woman who sent the Lantus *again* because it makes such a huge difference in his life. It's a heck of a lot easier to think about drinking enough water when you don't have to take into account how much sugar your body's going to try to dump because you're sick.
3. my sister said she'll buy a carseat for the Seamonkey!! HUGE relief, let me tell you. I still can't believe that I'm due in two months...
: She doesn't have an infant seat to pass along, either-- my other sister was in a car accident and the new niece's infant seat had to be replaced (it wasn't a serious accident, baby was fine; Said niece is a tank anyway so my sister replaced it with a convertible).
4. my brother mailed me a dozen-odd infant prefolds that I'd forgotten I sent to my sister-in-law ages ago. Two months left... it's about time I took inventory of the diapers.
Sadly, though, I already know how much baby boy clothing there is-- *none*.
: I got rid of all of it when I was decluttering and we were planning mike's vasectomy.
Ugh. I guess that's what I'll spend the next few hours doing, taking inventory of the baby things...
5. my main Gemstone character is loveable and loved. It's silly... but it helps.
She's not me and she really isn't much like me, but as a creation of mine which I animate... well, the fact that she's loveable means that a tiny piece of me is loveable too.
6. The fact that food counts as "special treats" for the kids. And you know what? I don't feel badly about spending a little extra on them. So when we get the food stamps, I will buy a pomegranite for the kids to share.
Just a small thing, but that one little extra won't feel unjustifiable. (is that even a word?!? i'm so hazy with a chance of stupid today...