Today was another emotionally hard day. Still no AF, but another BFN and I'm all but sure we're out of the game this month. I'm on CD 13, and it's just not looking promising. I'm pretty sure I'll see AF tomorrow.
I don't understand how my body can experience so many strange symptoms that I've never felt before and have it come to nothing. I mean, we've only done this two times now, but I didn't feel much of anything last cycle. Makes me feel like I'm going crazy or something!
I appreciate the discussion about being in control. That's actually exactly what my therapist and I discussed today! I have major issues when I'm not in control and don't have a plan. It's like, if I know, one way or the other what is happening in the near future, I can plan accordingly. This great big question mark hanging over my head is so hard to handle. I find myself freezing up, living too much in my head, and too much online searching for that one answer that will tell me definitively whether or not I'm pregnant. Not going to happen, but I can't stop researching, checking in here with everyone, checking and re-checking my chart.... BurtsGirl
, can you teach me how to knit??