Queer TTC December 2007 - Page 9

[frog]

Originally Posted by Hulahoop

in the meantime, still charting on fertility friend, and i have a question....i didn't temp today, but did enter other symptoms, mucous consistency, etc., and just that info rearranged my chart and took away the ovulation crosshairs. Has that happened to any of you? As far as I know, i've always ovulated (regular cycle, detected surge, all checkups good), and i even got an HCG shot this cycle!

Yes! Drove me bonkers. I'd typically over-ride their ridiculousness and put in my own crosshairs and try not to let it get to me.

[baby_baby_mommy]

Hey, Hulahoop, I just realized you're in SF, too. Hiya

I'm 2 days into the 2ww and trying not to put everything into either the pg or not-pg camp. I am hereby making a new camp called "probably the burrito"

[Hulahoop]

thanks, frog! good to know i'm not alone. i could see a temp rearranging my chart, but i think it's so weird that it happened just based on mucous and symptoms!

glad to see another SF person here, baby_baby_mommy! what do you think the odds are we know (or know of) each other?

i'm at that place where i am just ready for my period to come already! bring it on so i can focus on the holidays and get excited for all the margaritas and fish tacos i'll be able to eat when we're in mexico for new year's! (not a bad consolation prize for not getting pregnant..)

[baby_baby_mommy]

Originally Posted by Hulahoop

i'm at that place where i am just ready for my period to come already! bring it on so i can focus on the holidays and get excited for all the margaritas and fish tacos i'll be able to eat when we're in mexico for new year's! (not a bad consolation prize for not getting pregnant..)

mmm, margaritas sound good! if this cycle is a bust, I think I'll have a xmas margarita. thx for the good idea

[simcon]

Wow does this thread move!!!

I have been out of town for some time (for an insemination trip, natch...), and so I haven't gotten to respond to all of your thoughtful, interesting posts. I love the bounty of reading them all in a big bunch, though, even though I missed being a part of the conversation while I was gone!

In any case, I'm joining you, MMM and baby_baby_mommy in the tww as of yesterday, I think.

But on the why kids question (great question!)--being a parent seems to add another dimension to life, to me, and I couldn't imagine missing out on that in this lifetime.

On spacing--sigh. I was hoping for closer spacing, but it is getting farther and farther apart each month. If this one would work, it'd be a 5.5 year gap. With the m/c'd one, they would have been 4 years apart, which I thought would be pretty nice. My consolation is that Maddie is very very ready to be a big sister now, and I think it'll be less taxing on us in many ways than much closer spacing.

[frog]

We have a surprising number of folks in the 2WW. Are there updates I've missed?

[kk_davey]

[QUOTE=snoopy13;9981385]

Originally Posted by frog

Also, when i was telling him and his wife about my partner and my decision to begin insemination, with my parter as the birth parent, (as we sat there eating breakfast with his infant), he said "i dont understand why you dont just adopt, i mean it wont' really be your kid" or something lovely like that. Of course, adoption is a fine option -- and one we might go ahead and do, but how insensitive is that!

My mum's trying hard to understand our family but really just doesn't get it. We have a 6 month old little girl Ali (whose birth mother is my partner, Annie), and I'm 13 weeks pregnant. My mum called up to say she was buying my niece and nephew some clothes, would it be premature to buy something for my foetus. It didn't even occur to her that Ali was my daughter too and that perhaps buying clothes for my 'born' daughter would be more appropriate!

She also said that no matter what she'll never feel the same way about Ali as she does about her biological grandchildren. I'm trying really hard to be patient because I know she just doesn't get it, but I'm finding it very trying. Particularly because 2 of her sisters are lesbians, so I would have thought she'd be ahead of the pack in understanding alternative families, not so bloody far behind!

[MujerMamaMismo]

Originally Posted by kk_davey

My mum's trying hard to understand our family but really just doesn't get it. We have a 6 month old little girl Ali (whose birth mother is my partner, Annie), and I'm 13 weeks pregnant. My mum called up to say she was buying my niece and nephew some clothes, would it be premature to buy something for my foetus. It didn't even occur to her that Ali was my daughter too and that perhaps buying clothes for my 'born' daughter would be more appropriate!

She also said that no matter what she'll never feel the same way about Ali as she does about her biological grandchildren. I'm trying really hard to be patient because I know she just doesn't get it, but I'm finding it very trying. Particularly because 2 of her sisters are lesbians, so I would have thought she'd be ahead of the pack in understanding alternative families, not so bloody far behind!

Oh god. That sounds awful. I really don't think I'd have the patience for that.

I think I'm 4dpo but ff thinks I'm 3. Regardless, I've got so much to worry about with Christmas (see my latest blog entry for more details) that I'm not at all tortured about the 2ww so far. No imaginary symptoms. No out of control daydreaming. Nonetheless, I'm having some implantation acupuncture this afternoon and am really looking forward to it.

: for all of us 2ww'ers.

[astraphell]

Today was another emotionally hard day. Still no AF, but another BFN and I'm all but sure we're out of the game this month. I'm on CD 13, and it's just not looking promising. I'm pretty sure I'll see AF tomorrow.

I don't understand how my body can experience so many strange symptoms that I've never felt before and have it come to nothing. I mean, we've only done this two times now, but I didn't feel much of anything last cycle. Makes me feel like I'm going crazy or something! :

I appreciate the discussion about being in control. That's actually exactly what my therapist and I discussed today! I have major issues when I'm not in control and don't have a plan. It's like, if I know, one way or the other what is happening in the near future, I can plan accordingly. This great big question mark hanging over my head is so hard to handle. I find myself freezing up, living too much in my head, and too much online searching for that one answer that will tell me definitively whether or not I'm pregnant. Not going to happen, but I can't stop researching, checking in here with everyone, checking and re-checking my chart.... BurtsGirl, can you teach me how to knit??

[MujerMamaMismo]

Originally Posted by astraphell

I don't understand how my body can experience so many strange symptoms that I've never felt before and have it come to nothing. I mean, we've only done this two times now, but I didn't feel much of anything last cycle. Makes me feel like I'm going crazy or something! :

Incredible isn't it? As crazy making as it is, it really is testimony to the awesome powers of our minds. There is no way, on a conscious level that I have allowed myself to imagine symptoms but on a sub-conscious level, my brain is doing it for me. Phenomenal. And really really frustrating.

[mhiccup]

Move me to waiting to O. I F*$&king bled today. This is the first time my period actually made me cry.

Well, I think I'm waiting to O. We had said that we would take December off if this month didn't happen because we will be in Houston for the holidays, but with O falling right smack in the middle of our trip we could safely have the goods sent there.

So, a poll. Is it:

a. Ewww, shipping sperm to your parents' house is too weird;
b. It is weird, but who cares. They want this grandbaby too;
c. Not weird at all - go for it! or;
d. Weird or not, trying to do this during the holidays while traveling might just be too stressful and a doomed proposition

Sorry to post and not contribute to the really great conversations in the last few days. Work has been crazy. But I will try to improve my lurking ways.

[MujerMamaMismo]

Originally Posted by mhiccup

Move me to waiting to O. I F*$&king bled today. This is the first time my period actually made me cry.

Well, I think I'm waiting to O. We had said that we would take December off if this month didn't happen because we will be in Houston for the holidays, but with O falling right smack in the middle of our trip we could safely have the goods sent there.

So, a poll. Is it:

a. Ewww, shipping sperm to your parents' house is too weird;
b. It is weird, but who cares. They want this grandbaby too;
c. Not weird at all - go for it! or;
d. Weird or not, trying to do this during the holidays while traveling might just be too stressful and a doomed proposition

Sorry to post and not contribute to the really great conversations in the last few days. Work has been crazy. But I will try to improve my lurking ways.

I'm sorry. My vote is for d - that's what my rational, calm mind tells me would be best. I don't know what I'd actually do though.

[ktcl]

mhiccup-- I vote for the final answer. I know you really want to get pregnant (right there with ya'!!) but I think trying to make it all happen while dealing with the holidays and not being home is going to bring on stress, which is not good for getting pregnant. On the other hand, a year and a half ago, when we first started trying for #2, I probably would've tried to make it work, just because I was so sure it was going to happen quickly. The more time has passed, the less attached I feel to any timeline.

I haven't yet answered the why have kids question-- and for me, it's why have #2... I can't even believe how much love oozes out of me for my little guy. I think he is amazing, and I love love love every moment of his development (that does not translate to every moment, in general, of course). I feel so lucky that I get to be a part of shaping this wonderful being, and that I get to be so intimately involved in his growing up, learning how to read, learning how to make friends, etc. I love creating a family that is different from the one I grew up in. And as far as having a second, I just feel like, why not multiply the love. And lately I have been feeling like DS is ready to have a sib, and not be in the spotlight all the time.

[travelgirlz]

Originally Posted by astraphell

Today was another emotionally hard day. Still no AF, but another BFN and I'm all but sure we're out of the game this month. I'm on CD 13, and it's just not looking promising. I'm pretty sure I'll see AF tomorrow.

I don't understand how my body can experience so many strange symptoms that I've never felt before and have it come to nothing. I mean, we've only done this two times now, but I didn't feel much of anything last cycle. Makes me feel like I'm going crazy or something! :

I hear ya! This was also only our second month trying and today was my blood test and a BFN This month I did have totally different symptoms than last month, but we had really low sperm counts, so I kind of expected the BFN, still hurts.

In regards to staying sane.....I think the further I get away from the insemination days the better I feel, I try to just go on as normal. Before we started this process I read everything baby I could get my hands on, now I don't feel like reading anything, except cookbooks!

Hey Frog!

Thanks for keeping the thread, can you please move me to waiting to O.

Thanks

[JenInMpls]

sorry for all the BFNs flying around

PA I saw today prescribed me robitussin with codeine... let's hope it knocks me out cold for 10 hours. I need the sleep. I've been up hacking for at least 3-4 hours after going to bed at 10:30 for the past 4-5 nights. Still, just thinking about taking the cough syrup right now is making me feel every time I've eaten something sweet today I've just felt completely yucky. Let's hope that lasts!

oh, and heartburn, too.

yours hyperanalyzing... : jen

[baby_baby_mommy]

Originally Posted by mhiccup

So, a poll. Is it:

a. Ewww, shipping sperm to your parents' house is too weird;
b. It is weird, but who cares. They want this grandbaby too;
c. Not weird at all - go for it! or;
d. Weird or not, trying to do this during the holidays while traveling might just be too stressful and a doomed proposition

I vote b

[frog]

KK, I'm not sure how it happened, but the bit you quoted in your post isn't mine. I think it's snoopy's?

[frog]

mhiccup, I vote d, for the reasons others have already shared, but also because I'm projecting all over the place about the hell it would be to try to do an insem amidst the craziness that is my parents' house during the holidays. I shudder at the very thought.

[BurtsGirl]

Originally Posted by astraphell

I don't understand how my body can experience so many strange symptoms that I've never felt before and have it come to nothing. I mean, we've only done this two times now, but I didn't feel much of anything last cycle. Makes me feel like I'm going crazy or something! :

Welcome to the crazy-makin of the queer baby-makin. Someone really creative needs to come up with a queer baby-makin rap song! I'll be a fly-girl! : <~~not very fly girl-ish but it was the best I could find.

Originally Posted by astraphell

I have major issues when I'm not in control and don't have a plan. It's like, if I know, one way or the other what is happening in the near future, I can plan accordingly. This great big question mark hanging over my head is so hard to handle. I find myself freezing up, living too much in my head, and too much online searching for that one answer that will tell me definitively whether or not I'm pregnant. Not going to happen, but I can't stop researching, checking in here with everyone, checking and re-checking my chart.... BurtsGirl, can you teach me how to knit??

Whoa, astraphell, are you my long lost twin? This is scary it's so me. Are you a Cappy too? And yea I'll teach you to knit. Well, I can give you some resources if you'd like which really taught me what I know.

Originally Posted by mhiccup

So, a poll. Is it:

a. Ewww, shipping sperm to your parents' house is too weird;
b. It is weird, but who cares. They want this grandbaby too;
c. Not weird at all - go for it! or;
d. Weird or not, trying to do this during the holidays while traveling might just be too stressful and a doomed proposition

I vote D and here's why. ANY time I've done any sort of traveling before O my O has been delayed by up to a week! In most of the resources I read (including TCOYF) traveling effects your cycle. Add to that the stress of being around family and the holidays, the whole thing could be a bust anyway and then what? I'd say play it safe, save your money, and enjoy the potentially last kid-less holiday you'll ever have!

[JenInMpls]

Originally Posted by BurtsGirl

Welcome to the crazy-makin of the queer baby-makin. Someone really creative needs to come up with a queer baby-makin rap song! I'll be a fly-girl! : <~~not very fly girl-ish but it was the best I could find.

oh dear. well, last time around I wrote a song for the first trimester to the tune of "glory, glory halleluia" so I suppose rap couldn't be that far behind, hm...

The challenge issued! I'll work on this in my copious free time

mhiccup I'm afraid I have to go with everyone else who is saying (d) - especially for the travel reason. When I went to Germany in April it wreaked such havoc with my cycle that it took me 2-3 cycles to get back in any sort of rhythm. I vote for 'enjoy the holidays and save the swimmers for when you are in a really good, relaxed space'.