DECEMBER dating thread!!! - Page 3

[BelovedK]

Originally Posted by mahna_mahna

I am going on my first single Momma date on Friday.

I used to work with this guy a long time ago and he just so happens to be best friends with my best friend's husband. He just got out of the military and came over to hang out while I was still pregnant and we got along swimmingly.
After I had the kid on Halloween, everytime I hung out he'd ask me how things were going and when I got to go hang out one night without my babe, he asked "Where's the baby?" He brushed my hair out of my face at one point and said, "I like looking at your face when I'm talking to you."
Instant smitten, that bastard.
He's got a daughter, so he knows what it's like.

Our first "date" is this Friday...squee!!!!

wow, that sounds promising Keep us posted.

I haven't heard back from the email guy (the one that I really 'liked') I am actually sort od sad (?) I don't even know him, I guess it was just the fantasy. The only thing I can think of is that my email addy scared him off it is my performance name (I am a fire dancer and performer) it is 'PyroKitty'

Well, I do have to use my umbrella so, hopefully one of these guys will pan out, if not, it's okay...you never know what can happen in the course of even a day

[SillyLilStinkweed]

Originally Posted by mahna_mahna

He brushed my hair out of my face at one point and said, "I like looking at your face when I'm talking to you."
Instant smitten, that bastard.
He's got a daughter, so he knows what it's like.

Our first "date" is this Friday...squee!!!!

I'm swooning for ya!


Zeta, yay!

Yep, sounds like everyone's good.

[BelovedK]

SLS, we crossposted

[Still_Snarky]

things are still going swimmingly with d. we're going to a big swanky party this weekend and i'm thrilled about that. i'm even splurging and getting a babysitter.

[Zeta]

Originally Posted by mahna_mahna

He brushed my hair out of my face at one point and said, "I like looking at your face when I'm talking to you."
Instant smitten, that bastard.

Ooh very cute! you must update us!!

Well I IM'd with my main crush last night for two hours. he started counting the times he laughed out loud. i think we ended on 13. a very endearing habit I thought. :

I am now confident that we will see each other soon, even though we haven't mentioned it. I mean, 2 hours of IM chat seems like it's pushing that medium to the max.

He has an autistic son that he plays soccer with in a disabilities league, he literally gets on the field and plays with his son. He said he has never heard of AP but when he googled it he said it sounded like what he does but never knew the name for it.

strange feeling to have a crush on someone you've never met. : :

[PixieAlly]

I had another date last night...we went to see The Mist and then went to IHOP for orange juice (ate too much popcorn LOL) and to talk.
He is a very nice guy but he is a single dad and spent a lot of the time trying to convince me I have to have the father of the baby in her life. No matter how many times I tried to explain that he is coming from the point of view of a dad who WANTS to be with his kid and the father of my baby is NOT, he just didn't get it. I got very frustrated by the end of the night. I told the father he is always welcome to be in our baby's life but it is NOT my responsibility to force it on him. This guy last night wants me to talk to a lawyer, and keep contacting the father and his parents to make sure they really want nothing to do with the baby, etc...why should I have to do all that? They know where I am! On top of that every time I contact him or his parents he tells me I am harassing him and will call the cops and I am sure he has convinced himself the baby isn't his anyway. Why do I want all that drama and crap in my life? And I told my date all that but no...he kept pushing. So that's that. I don't want to date someone who's going to run a guilt trip on me every time. Why doesn't he call the father up and guilt trip him...he's the one who wants nothing to do with us. Ugh, sorry, I guess I went off on a tangent here.

Ally

[incorrigible]

what a pain, pixie. I hate when guys get all butinsky. Especially when they decide they know everything about a situation they have nothing to do with. blah!

WOW though, to the rest of you! lol. I'm so happy for you guys. I love reading all the updates (even the not as happy ones). I think I'm living vicariously through you all, sometimes. =D

[LLobsterTV]

Originally Posted by PixieAlly

I had another date last night...we went to see The Mist and then went to IHOP for orange juice (ate too much popcorn LOL) and to talk.
He is a very nice guy but he is a single dad and spent a lot of the time trying to convince me I have to have the father of the baby in her life. No matter how many times I tried to explain that he is coming from the point of view of a dad who WANTS to be with his kid and the father of my baby is NOT, he just didn't get it. I got very frustrated by the end of the night. I told the father he is always welcome to be in our baby's life but it is NOT my responsibility to force it on him. This guy last night wants me to talk to a lawyer, and keep contacting the father and his parents to make sure they really want nothing to do with the baby, etc...why should I have to do all that? They know where I am! On top of that every time I contact him or his parents he tells me I am harassing him and will call the cops and I am sure he has convinced himself the baby isn't his anyway. Why do I want all that drama and crap in my life? And I told my date all that but no...he kept pushing. So that's that. I don't want to date someone who's going to run a guilt trip on me every time. Why doesn't he call the father up and guilt trip him...he's the one who wants nothing to do with us. Ugh, sorry, I guess I went off on a tangent here.

Ally

thank jeebus you saw this side to him early on, but still what a bummer.

[Zeta]

Originally Posted by Medusa

Yeah! That's a lot of it in a nutshell.

The only thing I would add is that for me it was important to look into the subtle gender assumptions that were embedded in what I expected a man to bring into my life and to really break those down.

By doing so it really let me expand my view of who I am, and now that I'm in a relationship it gives me a freedom to accept and embrace my partner as a more full and genuine human being. KWIM?

I'd also say that more of the focus of looking at who I truly am now and coming to love that person in entirety has been way more helpful, instead of setting up a list of "who I need to become".

For a longtime I had the "list" in my head of who I needed to become before I could allow myself self-love and acceptance. The person I am RIGHT NOW with all my flaws and short coming NEEDS that love and self acceptance in order to grow and blossom.

Thanks for this. I am following in your footsteps. I know just what you mean about how it allows you to "accept and embrace my partner as a more full and genuine human being". I think that's called intimacy. Starts with being intimate with yourself.

[Zeta]

Originally Posted by robinchap1

I'll jump on that thread with you!!! That's me to a T!!! You should see the piles of laundry and stuff around here. :

Yeah... I have a tendency to do that email obsessive checking thing too. I think part of it really is that it's just something DIFFERENT, you know? A break in the routine... potential for all the things we wish for in life... I don't necessarily think it's always that we're SO into the guy, you know? I've obsessively checked even when I've already figured out I'm not that into the guy! But I do also know that feeling when you're starting to feel potential and you don't hear back... Hang in there! The ups and downs and obsessive checking do get less once you get used to the whole thing.

robinchap1 thank you for your encouragement. I think I was too blue to respond when your note posted, but I it did help.

[my2girlz9901]

[QUOTE=Zeta;9908655] have heard the expression, "Become what you want to attract." If I want someone who takes care of himself in postive ways, I need to do that for myself. If I want someone with a healthy and whole sense of self, not looking for other people or addictions to make him feel worthy and good, I need to do that for myself.



Hi jumping in new to this board but Zeta I love this quote. I have found I find men that are just so wrong for me and I think this is the answer to my problem! Gonna work on myself more then try to meet someone new.

[LankyLizards]

I am not dating, yet, but have a pretty huge crush on someone who I have actually known for about five years, but now I am seeing him much differently. He is in a band and they have a show tonight. I don't *think* I can't go but I am baking him cookies. (Well, for the whole band, ya know!? ) He is also a single father. And dd loves him. :

[BelovedK]

I have had 2 dates!!!

Last night I went out with K, a match.com guy. I liked him, we had good conversation, but I didn't feel 'at home' and 100% comfortable with him. I think we are less than compatible, but I found myself giving him my number Why, oh why??? I now have to deal with hima nd the truth, I always tell the truth usually, maybe it was because he paid for a large, lavish dinner (I only wanted to order an appetizer, he ordered a tableful of food anyways) He tried to kiss me, I turned my head and said "I just can't"

This morning however, I met another match guy, D, for coffee. He is VERY compatible with me. I felt 'at home ' and comfortable. Not the intense high I had with the last guy I had the fiasco "learning experience" with, but I find myself thinking about him. He is also a performer (like me) and he understands what I am talking about, he just 'gets it' when it comes to me, a rare thing. HE asked me to go out again, and I had NO reservations, I am excited about it. It was like a breath of fresh air. He seems like he could fit in with all of the facets of my life where K didn't, he was kind of arrogant, he had $$ and flaunted it to me. I don't really care. D isn't wealthy, but he didn't seem to be struggling. I don't know, he has 2 kids and seems like a good dad.

[BelovedK]

I meant that K was arrogant, D was NOT.

When i read that over it wasn't clear.

Wish me luck ladies

It looks like I'm going to be needing an umbrella There is still one more guy I have to meet, J, he and I talked for 2 hours the other night. I like D though, we will see.

[Medusa]

Oops! Weather forecast!

[fek&fuzz]

BelovedK, I was actually cringing when I read your description of your first date. I've been on a few of those, and there is nothing better than when it is finally done and over with.

The second one sounded like it made up for it, though. It's good to feel at home.

-fek, who isn't a single parent but who loves one.

[BelovedK]

Originally Posted by Medusa

Oops! Weather forecast!

:

[lld]

Originally Posted by Medusa

Oops! Weather forecast!

Could you send some of the rain over this way? I seem to be in a drought:

[mahna_mahna]

Tomorrow is the date. Squeee!!!

But...
He's been texting me on and off the past two days. *bounces around merrily* I will definitely tell you all how it goes.

[BelovedK]

Originally Posted by mahna_mahna

Tomorrow is the date. Squeee!!!

But...
He's been texting me on and off the past two days. *bounces around merrily* I will definitely tell you all how it goes.

we will be waiting