Originally Posted by boobybunny
laurelavenue I have a totally different point of view on this one.
I think it is time to take another look at child support. There is no reason why there should be such a difference in the two homes.
I respectfully disagree. You don't know how much of that money is his wifes, how much of it is piled up on credit cards, how well that Laurelavenue's ex H manages his money or what they've saved for.
My DH and I earn no more than my boys mothers household does between State Aid, Child Support from two different men, Social Security, and her DP's odd jobs, yet, somehow, we manage to have our electricity on legally, own a car, buy books and toys and computers (occasionally) have a *gasp* phone, make sure that the children have enough to eat without rationing out ramen noodles, and wear there own underwear. Nothing fancy by any stretch of the imagination, but we try. She, sadly doesn't. The children thought that church on that side of town was a place to go get clothing and food handouts, not a place of worship. She's bad with money. Does that mean that DH should have to pony up more child support to even things out? Should I, as the wife, be punished because the children don't have the same things at her house that they do at our house? Does their mother, by virtue of giving birth, still have the finacial rights as wife, even though they are no longer a couple?
People do things differently in their own houses. As long as the amount that she's getting is fair, then the issue of "Keeping up with the Joneses" is something completely different from, "Let's make sure that all is fair at all costs." The OP is no longer married to her ex. What he does at his house with his money is, outside of the care of their children, what he does at his house with his money.
And that, OP, is in a nutshell what I tell the children. "Your Mom and Dad are both responsible for loving and taking care of you, but they live in different houses. People do things differently in their own houses, but you still have everything that you need."