Tolerance and Understanding for Special Needs Parenting Please - Page 2

[Ellie'sMom]

Originally Posted by Finch

Hell, I think the entire board could use an...uh....educating experience about looking down their noses in judgment/thinking they have the lock on the perfect mommy formula, but that's just me :.

Hi! I'm one of those moms who doesn't belong here, though I do lurk because of some lingering concerns about one of my kiddos.

First off, I do bow down to you SN mamas. You rock.

I wanted to echo Finch, and let you all know as an FYI, that we had this same discussion on the Parenting Multiples board a couple of months back. This is an issue throughout MDC (think breastfeeding challenges, queer parenting...). Sometimes I think they should do away with the New Posts button.

[Teensy]

I don't have a SN child, and I wouldn't want it closed because I think I have learned a great deal from reading in this forum.

A sticky at the topic of the forum couldn't hurt, but I usually click on threads from the New Posts and wouldn't see the sticky anyway.

I think writing posts like the OP every few months is probably the best way to remind everyone of the special needs of families on this board. And maybe someone could write a kind, but firm message that could be PMed as needed to anyone who posts a too-judgmental-for-the-particular-situation post.

[Finch]

Originally Posted by bdavis337

I wouldn't want it closed either. Lurking helped me a great deal. Maybe closed to posting, but not reading? Then again, no. b/c I think that would deter a lot of folks who could use the initial information and support. Maybe just - we all need to remember that mdc is just an online extension of the real world. And the real world sucks. We do have a safe haven here, but it's just like everything else. IRL, there are annoyances. Same thing here. IRL though, we don't have the "ignore" function like we do here!

This is true. When folks peer in here from their ivory towers and go a-postin' to steer us poor, misguided, imperfect mommies back on the path to AP/NFL righteousness, I think we do a pretty good job of calling in the calvary to defend our own.

This is going to sound horrid, too, but maybe these people who are posting in here with their judgment and one-size-fits-all-NFL/AP-gospel ideals will get a nice healthy wake up call when we give them the what for. : You know, sort of a changing the world one smackdown at a time?

Meh. I'm really crabby today. Hell, I'm really crabby all this month. I shouldn't even be posting on these threads until this moose fetus is out of me or something. I'm fat and can't breathe or bend right and my boobs are leaking out of control and I fart and contract all the time and don't sleep, so I'm pretty much evil on a stick right now.

Y'all just ignore me.

[Kodama]

I also think there should be something said about respecting the treatment plans that the parents have made for their child.

One example is treating autism.

A parent who wants to try a DAN! doctor should be respected as much a parent who goes mainstream as well as a parent who is all about neurodiversity. There is a strong different between good information with asked for advice and flaming. For the most part, I think we have all been quite respectful towards each other and the choices we have made for our kids.

It is the fly by posters who do not realize that this is the special needs forum or what special needs parenting is all about that tend to cause the issues.

We can disagree and have different opinions but the most important thing here is respect. We have enough to deal with in our lives that the last thing we need here is more judgmental bullcrap.

[wonderwahine]

but if we ignored you finch darling, how would we know if the microwaves and wi fi havent kiddnapped your brain!!

[kchoffmann]

Originally Posted by Finch

Y'all just ignore me.

Uh, no way, Finch. Not when you write such immensely entertaining posts as you just did above!

[Finch]

Originally Posted by wonderwahine

but if we ignored you finch darling, how would we know if the microwaves and wi fi havent kiddnapped your brain!!

Oh don't worry, I'm wearing my trusty tinfoil hat....decorated for Xmas, of course.

[Kodama]

I just got the mental image of a baby with antlers and a vaginal birth.

My tubes just tied themselves.

[wonderwahine]

Originally Posted by Finch

Oh don't worry, I'm wearing my trusty tinfoil hat....decorated for Xmas, of course.

oh, very good, carry on then do you have one for the moose baby?

[wonderwahine]

Originally Posted by Kodama

I just got the mental image of a baby with antlers and a vaginal birth.

My tubes just tied themselves.

: i was trying to ignore the visual, thanks...... my uterus just ran away

[kchoffmann]

In some ways I wonder if when those judgemental perfect-mom-fly-by-ers come by here, it isn't a fine opportunity for those who don't feel comfortable letting loose on people IRL (uh, that would not be me, btw) to do so safely and somewhat anonymously?

[kittynurse]

I'm glad that this is an open forum because I have learnt so much from the wise and wonderful mamas (and papas) here and really, it will be thanks to them when we finally get a diagnosis because no-one IRL really thought there was a problem until I started saying "hey, wait a second, this sounds like that mama on MDC's child".

So I bow down to the parents here who have helped our family in ways that they will never know.

But...thanks to *my* social anxiety and ADHD, I sometimes say things that don't really come out the way I mean. I could really use that hand coming out of the computer to whack me in the head and say - do you really mean that?

Martha

[Individuation]

Can we just put up a big sticky that says:

PSA: Autistic Adults Exist.

Because I don't think that one has gotten through to a few people, who do the traditional autism-bashing post based on thinking their neighbor's aunt's friend's son or one of their sister's knitting-group-member's daycare kids might have Teh Assburger's.

[my3peanuts]

I agree with keeping this a public forum. In general people just need to be more sensitive to what they don't understand. That goes for lots of forums!!

[Finch]

Originally Posted by Kodama

I just got the mental image of a baby with antlers and a vaginal birth.

My tubes just tied themselves.

: My hoo hoo just sucked up into my uterus after reading that.

Originally Posted by wonderwahine

oh, very good, carry on then do you have one for the moose baby?

But of course......

Originally Posted by Individuation

Because I don't think that one has gotten through to a few people, who do the traditional autism-bashing post based on thinking their neighbor's aunt's friend's son or one of their sister's knitting-group-member's daycare kids might have Teh Assburger's.

LMFAO!!!! Oh noes!!! Teh Assburger's!!!! BRAIN COOTIES!!! Run away! Run away!!

[MyTwoAs]

Originally Posted by Individuation

Can we just put up a big sticky that says:

PSA: Autistic Adults Exist.

Because I don't think that one has gotten through to a few people, who do the traditional autism-bashing post based on thinking their neighbor's aunt's friend's son or one of their sister's knitting-group-member's daycare kids might have Teh Assburger's.

Classic!

[Brigianna]

Originally Posted by Individuation

Can we just put up a big sticky that says:

PSA: Autistic Adults Exist.

Because I don't think that one has gotten through to a few people, who do the traditional autism-bashing post based on thinking their neighbor's aunt's friend's son or one of their sister's knitting-group-member's daycare kids might have Teh Assburger's.

Not as good as a sticky, but you just inspired me to change my sig line again.

[jauncourt]

Originally Posted by Individuation

Can we just put up a big sticky that says:

PSA: Autistic Adults Exist.

Oh, yes, please! And also SID adults (I'm one! ), and Asperger's, and, and, and...

Half the reason I am in this forum is because *I* have special needs - the other half is my DS1, and *his* special needs. Which don't mesh...

I've gotten good coping advice here, for both halves of our equation

Maura

[ShaggyDaddy]

Originally Posted by Individuation

might have Teh Assburger's.

Serving Assburgers with a smile

I have been known to say from time to time: I may have asperger's but at least I'm not being an assburger.

[FancyD]

Originally Posted by Kodama

I just got the mental image of a baby with antlers and a vaginal birth.

My tubes just tied themselves.

I wish we had a quoter.