Homebirthers Haven Thread - Page 11

[transformed]

I have a problem guys-

I woke the kids up when I was in labor by screaming loud in the middle of the night. They are still talking to be about how it scared them.

So how do I address their concerns?

[redeyedvireo]

it was fantastic. fantastic! i labored alone from midnight to 8 in the morning. then my husband got up and my mother came over. they filled the pool for me around dusk. the birth attendant got there around five o'clock, left right away to pick up her bag, and came back as he was crowning. i never noticed my body doing any pushing. he was born at 6 pm, in the pool, in the caul. we snuggled in the pool right away, then got on the bed to snuggle and nurse. it was very peaceful. i'm so glad i was at home, and could ask people to wait in the living room, because i couldn't make my laboring noises - very loud hums, sort of - in front of them, and the noises made things much easier. i'm also glad i decided not to do a UC, because the sensation of crowning after no pushing at all panicked me.

oh, transformed, i have no ideas for you, but

[ivymae]

Our birth was wonderful - I am going to post Alice's birth story on the blog in a couple days and i will link to it when it is up, but it really could not have been any better. A day of putsy contractions, two hours of "oh, I am having a baby!" contractions, and then 20 minutes of transition+pushing. I roared her out in the water, into my hands. Such a relaxed and comfortable (though intense there at the end!) birth.

And Transformed - perhaps start telling them the stories of their births, and of baby's birth, just whenever or at bedtime. Emphasis the funny/happy parts, and describe yourself in funny ways - have them imagine you as an elephant blowing your horn, or a wolf howling, or a bear roaring, and act it out. Make the mysterious accessible and fun, instead of strange.

[transformed]

Originally Posted by ivymae

And Transformed - perhaps start telling them the stories of their births, and of baby's birth, just whenever or at bedtime. Emphasis the funny/happy parts, and describe yourself in funny ways - have them imagine you as an elephant blowing your horn, or a wolf howling, or a bear roaring, and act it out. Make the mysterious accessible and fun, instead of strange.

thats a great idea!

[AGlimmeringHope]

It went amazing, wonderful, magically, etc. Seriously, it was so perfect- even the scary parts (2+ hrs of transition I was NOT prepared for, and realizing during that time that the MW wouldn't make it) were not that scary iykwim.

[Right of Passage]

Originally Posted by Katfka

bump.

Homebirthers - how did everything turn out?

It didn't. I go back and forth between feeling blue about not birthing at home, and feeling like a total goddess for my natural VBAC. Today is a blue day...

[weliveintheforest]

I'm sorry your kdis were frightened during your birth Transformed Hopefully as some time passes they will understand a bit more and not feel better about it.

My homebirth went really well, about as good as I can imagine my births to be! It was hard work, and I was a bit overwhelmed and wishing it would stop at a couple of points, but I am overall very hapy and proud of myself.

[clintonhillmama]

Originally Posted by Nursingmama05

It didn't. I go back and forth between feeling blue about not birthing at home, and feeling like a total goddess for my natural VBAC. Today is a blue day...

you should feel like a goddess for a natural VBAC, no matter where it happened!

my HB was a VBAC as well - and pushing out my baby may be my proudest moment ever. my husband was amazing support, and my midwife and doula were fantastic too - but kind of left the 2 of us to it, which was what we wanted.

everything went well, my water broke about 4:30 am and baby was born about 24 hours later. i had a relatively long pushing stage (i keep reading post about 4 pushes, etc) that started pretty early in my labor, so that was kind of freaky. i kept asking why i didn't get that "break" i read about b/w transition and pushing! i was wondering how long i could keep up pushing, but in the end it was a couple of hours (i *think*). i was in the pool for the beginning, but baby was pressing on a nerve in my leg and that was the hardest thing for me to negotiate - at the beginning of each contraction, i would get a shooting pain up the outside of my leg - and it took a while for me to find a position that didn't make it worse (NOTHING made it better). the toilet was great for a while, too. i ended up on the bed, which is the last place i expected to be, but the leg thing was best there.

feeling her head move thru my pelvic bones was amazing and when her head was born, i was ecstatic! then she was out and on my chest:

[MCKH]

My homebirth went really well. Everything worked out just fine. I am kind of surprised that I didn't chicken out, and if I'd had a really long labor I probably would have, but luckily the very painful part only lasted a couple hours.

Sometimes it blows me away that I had my baby at home (it's a fairly radical concept around here) and sometimes I think I have post-traumatic stress from it! I guess I romanticized the notion of the homebirth - the candles, the music, the dim lighting, the bed made up just so and me relaxing through contractions like a pro. It didn't happen that way at all - it just happened in a fury and there was lots of yelling and I gave birth on a tile floor next to a toilet. I whined like a baby and snapped at my midwife and looked like a caged and rabid animal!

I thought I'd feel prouder, more self-righteous or vindicated somehow from my traumatic first birth (actually, it was after the birth that was bad, not the birth itself.) I don't. If anything I am more understanding of people who want pain meds during labor. I am more open to the various ways women see their ideal birth.

Still, I am so glad that I had my baby at home. I know in time when I feel more normal (I have some fairly bad anxiety right now) it will all be clearer and feel better. I want to say it was an experience I'll never forget but I can barely remember most of it!

[kittywitty]

Mine went well, really. It was a UC which was awesome and I wouldn't go back and change it or ever do it another way again. I felt very safe, comfortable, and empowered. I wish I didn't end up with a hemorrhage, but what can you do, right? It wouldn't have been different in the hospital, in fact having a doc pull my placenta out was what caused my hemorrhage with ds.

My birth itself was a little traumatic being back labor and the insanity which was pushing out a 14.75" head coming out facing my thigh after exhaustive back labor. But I am now getting over that a bit and I wouldn't have it any other way (well, the back labor part maybe ).

My kids were a bit thrown off by my screaming. I never have when birthing or in labor before, but the back labor was so excruciating. It was like giving birth for the first time except horrendous. They got a little frightened, but in between contractions, I explained to them that I was ok, and that there was nothing wrong and it was normal. My ds was worried by the blood, but I explained to him bleeding was normal after birth and then when we went to the hospital, I told him I was ok and just wanted checked out to make sure.

[Sihaya]

Originally Posted by clintonhillmama

i had a relatively long pushing stage (i keep reading post about 4 pushes, etc) that started pretty early in my labor, so that was kind of freaky. i kept asking why i didn't get that "break" i read about b/w transition and pushing! i was wondering how long i could keep up pushing, but in the end it was a couple of hours (i *think*).

This was me, too. Fortunately, I was only in active labor for about 3.5 hours before I needed to push, then I pushed for about 2.5 hours (he had shoulder dystocia). Overall, despite several "complications" (dystocia, a short cord that tore when the mws pulled him out, meconium in the water), my home birth was more or less exactly what I hoped for. It was the exact length I had wanted, the midwife was there for the exact amount of time as I wanted, I gave birth in the tub, and he was even born on the same day of the week I had visualized (I did the visualization as part of my Hypnobabies program and they said to be as specific as possible, right down to choosing a date and time).

[Right of Passage]

Originally Posted by clintonhillmama

you should feel like a goddess for a natural VBAC, no matter where it happened!

I do feel like a goddess ( my dear friend IRL who is on the Nov DDC gave me the "VBAC Rockstar" title) I did everything but birth at home. If I had to have a hospital birth I'm glad that's the way it went, no time for intervention.

feeling her head move thru my pelvic bones was amazing and when her head was born, i was ecstatic!

That was an amazing feeling, and reaching down and feeling his slimy wet squishy face.