A Liberal Mom in a Conservative World - Page 2

[motheringforme]

I am a Christian and don't agree with the behavior, but I would not reprimand someone I don't know. If it was someone I knew personally, I'm sure we would be able to talk about it calmly, even if we disagreed. If someone was not comfortable discussing it with me, then I need to respect their decision. Some people need to realize that this kind of behavior does nothing but breed contempt. I hope I can share my beliefs without coming across as scornful.

[bri276]

It's funny, last summer I witnessed a conversation between two of my aunts. Aunt #1's stepson (18 yrs old) was not at the party, it was explained, because he was out with his long-distance girlfriend, who had driven three hours to spend the weekend with him at their house. Aunt #2 acts surprised and confirms that the girlfriend is sleeping IN the house, and asks how close. Aunt #1 practically falls all over herself explaining that it's not too close, because -get this- she and her husband are sleeping on a mattress on the floor in between her stepson's room and the room that the girlfriend is sleeping in.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting on the couch barely containing my laughter- because hello? They're not at the party that they were supposed to be at because they're driving around together, alone! As if they can't have sex in the car! I just shake my head every time I think of it. I don't mean to imply that they definitely are having sex. For all I know, they're not. But people who think they can stop it by physically separating teenagers whenever they get the chance are kidding themselves! No, I'm not saying people should allow something in their house that they're not comfortable with, but to me, it's ridiculous to judge or shame another parent for accepting their teenager's sex life by encouraging responsibility, and not necessarily forbidding same bedroom/nighttime contact. I know that it never, ever stopped me as a teen!

[nolonger]

dd is 18, so I don't know how much of this applies to CashewMommy's question. She and her partner (of about a year and a half's duration) are both welcome in my home and are very considerate about their sexuality, i.e., I don't have to listen to disturbing noises coming from their room, they are responsible about birth control, etc.

His mother, who is a delightful person and loves my dd just as much as I love her ds, is not comfortable with having her spend the night at her house.

So the kids live with me.

I don't consider myself "sex positive", just realistic, and I am so glad that my adult daughter's relationship does not mean that I am losing my baby girl, but that I have gained a "bonus son" who adds so much to my family and fills a hole in my own life that I never knew was there.

[sleepingbeauty]

ok. I've been with my fiancee for 3 and a half years now. we started spending the night with each other about a year ago. I really see nothing wrong with this. And I have no problem telling the people who disrespect me because I have the nerve to sleep on the same mattress as the guy I love (*shock/gasp!*) to shove it.

you neighbor has NO RIGHT to judge ANYONE. It's your family. Not theirs. If they don't like it then TOO BAD. Neither you nor your kid are doing anything wrong.

I'm really sorry you have to deal with that

[dex_millie]

Originally Posted by motheringforme

I am a Christian and don't agree with the behavior, but I would not reprimand someone I don't know. If it was someone I knew personally, I'm sure we would be able to talk about it calmly, even if we disagreed. If someone was not comfortable discussing it with me, then I need to respect their decision. Some people need to realize that this kind of behavior does nothing but breed contempt. I hope I can share my beliefs without coming across as scornful.

:

[holly6737]

Originally Posted by motheringforme

I am a Christian and don't agree with the behavior, but I would not reprimand someone I don't know. If it was someone I knew personally, I'm sure we would be able to talk about it calmly, even if we disagreed. If someone was not comfortable discussing it with me, then I need to respect their decision. Some people need to realize that this kind of behavior does nothing but breed contempt. I hope I can share my beliefs without coming across as scornful.

:

I wouldn't even share my beliefs, though. I'd just think whatever opinion I had about your parenting in my head and keep it to myself. It would be inappropriate to approach you about it IRL like that. I'd probably just smile and say "Oh, that's wonderful..." oand go about my day. She was rude, no question.

ETA: Forget that, I wouldn't even ask. At our last townhouse I know the guys two doors down were dealing drugs, but did I ask? Heck no. I tried my best to not even look at them. It's no one's business who's car is in your driveway as long as you are safe and sound.