I've been thinking about this for a while, now, and I really disagree. However, please note that this response is not directed towards the PP directly, it is in response to the bolded part, and in response to some other things I have read on this board.
I think I have every right to protect my baby from any illnesses other children may be carrying, and I think I have the right to say who is and isn't allowed to come visit my baby.
I've heard sentiments along the lines of step-children's rights, and while I understand where those who hold them are coming from (the viewpoint of a step-child), I think it disregards my rights as a parent. I think my rights as the protector of my child supercedes any rights of any other person to access my child.
The new baby is my responsibility, and the burden is on me to protect the baby. I feel that part of that protection is making sure the baby and I have enough time together to bond, establish nursing, and ensure that those who come around are healthy. I feel these are necessary protections in order to assure the life of my child.
Honestly, do you think the children's mother gives two cents about my new baby? Nope. Why should she? It isn't her responsibility. Her concern lies with her two children. Do you think the only one my DF is concerned about is the new baby? Nope. He loves all three of his children. Finally, I have responsibility for just my child, just as the step-children's mother is the only one with full responsibility of her two children. What if my baby were ill, do you think she would want her children to come over? If I were her, I wouldn't. And, if she says that she doesn't want to put her children in a position of catching whatever the baby has, then it seems like there would be a lot of support for her saying "I want you to wait until your baby isn't sick, and then you can have the kids." Yet, if I want them to not come over when they are sick, so that my child doesn't become ill, then I get to be the evil step-mother again.
I don't feel that anyone has a "right" to my baby, other than myself and DF. If I had 10 natural children, those other children wouldn't have a "right" to my new baby, either. It seems like a lot of people think that, just because there are step-children in the picture, then all my rights are out the window, although those rights wouldn't be if the step-children were my natural children. What I mean is, it appears to me, that I could send all my natural children away for a month, and people would say that is my choice. But, if I want a few days (or even a few weeks), and that space of time involves telling step-children that they can't come over, then suddenly I am a selfish, evil step-mother.
Both of these situations put the step-mother in a very awkward position. We already have FAR fewer rights as a step-parent, but we are expected to act like a natural parent. These expectations put all the "rights" with the step-children's mother and her children, and any woman and her children who come after, get treated as second-rate humans.
That seems awfully skewed, to me.