Non talkative 11DD-how to communicate?

[amanecer]

First off, I cant believe she's 11.

Im trying to figure out how to improve communication with my 11 year old daughter who always seems to have everything under control, goes with the flow, and gets the short end of the stick in attention because of her "attention sucking" younger siblings. BTW, she's always content and happy, just doesnt share much about herself, school, friends etc...

Ive realized lately that we barely spend quality time with her and when we do she hardly talks. Any advice? Games? Activities? Books on the topic?

I was like her as a child but my parents never tried communicating either. I really dont want to loose touch with her.

Thanks!

[fek&fuzz]

In the car, driving, just the 2 of you, preferably when it's dark out. Easy for them to open up because you aren't looking at each other, and there are no distractions. And make sure you just give her lots of space to talk (meaning, be quiet.) If you ask, "how are things at school" and she says "fine". Be quiet. Give her time to sort out her thoughts, figure out what she wants to say, how to say it, etc.

The book How to Talk So Your Teen Will Listen and Listen So Your Teen Will Talk is a good one, too.