Did *anybody* have a good first birth? - Page 2

[jennifercp8]

I don't have a 2nd birth to compare it to, but I loved my first birth. Looking back, there are things I want to do differently next time, but nothing glaringly horrible, IMO.

I had a natural, hospital birth with an OB. Ended up not being my OB, but that was ok. I got to the hospital at 7cm, and started pushing about an hour and a half later. The nurses were great, supportive, and the doctor was more than happy to just let me do what I wanted. I had a 6 hour labor, minimum tearing, and was BF within minutes. In my opinion, they did everything right - I chose that hospital and OB practice for a reason!

[lovesdaffodils]

I've only had one birth yet, but it was great. It was at a freestanding birth center with a midwife I love. It was long and hard physically, but it was everything I could imagine. I have no regrets, though I will have homebirths for the rest of my births.

[DisplacedYooper]

I had a great first (home) birth.

But you are asking about hospital births. My friend had a great first hospital birth. Unmedicated, no medical interventions. She credits staying at home as long as possible (12 hours in her case!). She went in when she was feeling pushy, and only labored at the hospital for 3 hours. And this is at our local hospital that has an over 50% C-section rate and is very interventionist.

So, it can be done! Have faith! Positive birthing thoughts only!

[georgia]

If it helps any, most of the mothers I know who have had wonderful first births have almost all found MDC prior to their births, so you're in good company

[ishyfishie]

I had a good first (only, so far) birth in a hospital as well! Our hospital stay AFTER the birth wasn't wonderful, but wasn't *too* bad. The birth itself was great though, thanks in large part to my midwife (and MDC, lol). No meds, no IVs, one 20-minute monitoring stint after which I spent the rest of the time in the shower and on the birthing ball, only intervention was a reluctant episiotomy by my midwife who knew I didn't want one and held out as long as possible.

Next time, I'll try to get away from the hospital after 24 hours instead of 48 hours, because the hospital stay was what irritated the heck out of me. Labor and delivery were just peachy!

[philomom]

I had a great first birth with my midwife in the hospital. No drugs or interventions of any kind. We took the Bradley childbirth classes. I love them!

[darsmama]

My first birth was a home waterbirth and it was wonderful. My second...sucked. My third, was wonderful, would have been PERFECT if the midwives arrived 9 minutes later

[superfastreader]

Originally Posted by Ruthla

My first birth was a homebirth with a midwife. I was very happy with my birth experience, and I'm glad I learned about HB before having my first baby.

me too.

[TurboClaudia]

my first birth was wonderful, albeit long. my second birth was also wonderful, and much shorter. both at home with midwives.

surround yourself with only positive stories, and if someone starts to tell you a story of birth, interrupt them with "oh, are you about to tell me a story of how wonderful your birth was, because those are the only stories i'm listening to right now, to get myself ready for my own wonderful birth...???" and if the story starts to sound like a not wonderful story, interrupt again with, "oh, i'm really sorry to interrupt, but this baby is sitting on my bladder and i have to go pee right now..." and run away. fast.

peaceful end of pregnancy and safe & beautiful birthing to you...

~claudia

[Steady101]

I loved my first birth. It was in a hospital, although not in the US. The UK hospital was more like a birthing center. I went completely natural and was allowed to labor as I choose. One midwife checked on me throughout the time and that was it, no one else wandering in and out, no ivs, issues with hep B, eye gunk, vit K.

[alegna]

My first birth was everything one could possibly hope for (well except the 31 hours of labor, but who's counting? )

But it was a homebirth.

I am 100% certain that if it had been a hospital birth in this city it would have been a nightmare. No hospital or hospital practitioner would have left me alone and let me labor for 31 hours or push for 6. I would have ended up with a section.

-Angela

[Nicole R.]

You've probably gotten enough positive responses by now, but here's another. My first-and-only was a hospital birth with an OB, and it was just fine -- but I am hoping for a homebirth next time! Did you notice that a lot of us who said our first birth was a good experience have only had one so far? Same here. Maybe my perspective will change after the second one?

When a nurse examined me in triage when I first arrived at the hospital, she was startled to discover that I was 10 cm and +3 -- I hadn't meant to stay home for so long, but things had been going so well I didn't want to leave.

Here are the good things that happened at the hospital:
* I delivered within 60 minutes of arriving
* no drugs were offered or taken
* no IV or even a heplock
* no Pitocin shot to help deliver the placenta (the nurse tried to give it, but the OB stopped her, saying I was doing fine)
* no episiotomy
* baby wasn't taken away to be suctioned even though there had been moderate meconium in the waters (they were all prepared to do so, but he turned out to be breathing just fine)
* we breastfed beautifully within minutes of birth

The bad things (all of which I could have done something about, except that I was deep in Laborland, and my doula grew suddenly impassive ):
* OB was delivering another baby when I arrived so I had to wait 30 minutes to push
* continuous fetal monitoring
* the room was packed full of like 10 people (including baby nurses) because they were worried about the meconium
* OB "made" me do hardcore directed pushing on my back
* pushing was so effective (I got the baby out in 30 minutes) that I couldn't slow down to deliver the shoulders and ended up with a second-degree tear

It sounds like you're prepared to stand up for yourself in the hospital -- or have someone else who will do it for you -- which is essential. I wish I'd done a better job of it. But don't go in with an adversarial attitude if you can help it. I think a relaxed mind and a relaxed body will help you birth better without triggering that "fight or flight" instinct that can stall labor.

[jerri]

My first birth was amazing, although none of our kids were born in a hospital. I was the 'coach' for my sister's first (and only) birth, and her's was in a hospital and it was amazing. There was very little 'routine procedures', no I.V., drugs, etc. I thought it was amazing, especially for a hospital. Hospitals are not for us, but I saw that it can work out for some.

[moodymaximus]

i had a really good hospital birth with my first. we were super prepared (reading Henci Goer and the Birth Partner for DH and so on) our ob was very hands-off, and i was treated with respect and patience.

i birthed with no interventions, and had the most wonderful nurse who stayed with me for 8 hours and was 100% supportive of natural birth--at that time i needed her support and she was there for me, being the best doula i can imagine.

yeah, if i look back i can always find little nits, like i had to get out of my room and walk 5 feet to the shower next door and they told me not to push and then to push, and i wanted to squate but they suggested against it, and the lactation consultant looked and behaved like she was a witch on drugs etc. yeah, i wanted to avoid all of these little things and we chose to homebirth / UC our second and planning a UC for the third.

BUT the overall experience was overwhelmingly positive and empowering. and i do consider myself lucky, considering all the horror stories i hear here and irl.

[lisarussell]

I had a great first birth.

I was 18 and it was a hospital birth. I was petrified when I discovered I was pregnant. Not afraid of pregnancy or being a mother, I really was jsut afraid fo the birth. I read every book our local library system had on pregnancy and birth. I devoured every website that existed (this was a while ago, dd#1 is 14 yrs old) and I actually interviewed everyone I knew who had children.

The pattern I saw was that the most horrible stories were coming from the women who were drugged.

This went against what I was hoping to find. I kept on reading, I even went to the medical textbooks at the College library. I was seriously trying to find a medical condition that would allow me to be drugged like a month before and a month after delivery. I didn't want to feel a thing.

All of the reading and research though led me to an entirely different plan. I ended up taking a Bradley Natural Childbirth class and went completely drug free.

I had a 4 page birth plan that I delivered to the hospital two or three times during my pregnancy. I got to know some of the L&D nurses before the birth because I wanted them to KNOW I was serious about my wishes. I went over it with my OB, too- but I knew hospital procedures and I knew that it was the nurses who had the most influence upon the labor, not the OB.

They also told me that offering Meds was a hospital policy- something about it being unethical to allow a person in pain to suffer. When the time came and they offered it to me, which they graciously did in the first 20 minutes of my arrival, so they wouldn't catch me in transition, making a decision I'd regret; I wasn't insulted or feeling defeated or ignored because they told me ahead of time that they HAD to do it.

I had requested no amniotomy and when my cervix was at 9cm for like 20 minutes, and I was writhing in a neverending transition, Christine (a pregnant nurse who had also enjoyed drug-free births) came to my aid. She told me that if I wanted to, I could check myself- the bag of waters was bulging almost to the vaginal opening and making a nice comfy pillow so baby's head wouldn't put that final pressure on the cervix to finish dilating. She said that if I wanted to, I could probably pinch and pull and it would break and I'd be pushing within 15 minutes. I was so desperate for it to end, I let her do it, I trusted her and didn't need to check. She was so right. The minute the water was gone, I felt an enormous pressure and felt baby's head begin to descend. I shouted out "I'm ready to push" and she said "well, I could check you now- but if I do, and you're fully dilated then I'll have to call the OB right away, and pushing can take a while for first time mothers. SOmetimes they forget to push LIKE YOU'RE HAVING A BM. So why don't you just rest a bit and I'll be back in a few minutes.

I took her advice to heart and tried a few practiced pushes while I could feel baby's head descending. Finally, when I "pushed" so loudly that they could hear me in the hallway- she came in and said "I just have to check you here, and if I see that you are fully dilated and can't stop pushing, I'll have to call the OB. She did the exam and said OMG you're a great pusher, OK- I'mm calling OB now, and the other gals (who were in the doorway) will wheel you into delivery.

I loved her way of keeping me informed on hospital policy so that I could behave in a way that gave me the birth I wanted while still following the rules.

Once I was wheeled into the delivery room, I gave a mighty mighty push and the DR entered the room in a red sweater, as I was pushing. He didn't even say HI- He just reached right for the scissors- Christine got in between him and I and said "Her birth plan, which you signed, states that she'd rather tear than have an episiotomy." So he turned around, put the scissors down, and she started a perineal massage and counter-pressure compress. I didn't realize how close baby's head was until she did this. In Bradley you're taught to "imitate sleep" between contractions and when it dawned on me that she was doing that, I sat up, found the mirror (hanging from the ceiling) and when the next contraction started, I pushed with all of my might and her head was born. 3 contractions, 3 pushes in the delivery room with my 1st baby, I was reeling with excitement. I couldn't believe I was actually doing this. Time stood still. Then another contraction came and I was able to push out the rest of her. They handed her to me immediately , I had never held a newborn before, I was trembling with excitement, wonder and pride. All I could say was "I can't believe I did it." And I said that over and over again. As per my birth plan, they rolled the little isolette right by my side so they could measure her. I got to give her her first bath, her first diaper and they didn't give any artificial nipples.

I got the birth I wanted, it was empowering and wonderful.

All the rest of my kids (5 more) have been born unattended. One was accidental in the car and the others were at home on purpose.

Just because I did it differently the other times doesn't mean that the first one wasn't wonderful, I just raised my standards a bit once I learned that I can do it from experience, instead of from books.


Anyhow- it was wonderful because I was in control and the nurses I were blessed with allowed me to be in control. It was 50% planning and 50% luck.

[Overproducktion]

My first birth I thought went okay, but now that I look back on it, not so much. Then again, my 2nd & 3rd didn't go very well either. I was newly 16, Rod was 18 when we had the first. I think I was really scared and tuned out. I wish I would have educated myself more. He was born vaginally at 35 weeks.

When we had our second I was 17 and felt more sure of myself. It started out great. I made it to 10 cm and pushed for 3 hours before they drugged me and used the suction cup and foreceps to get him out.

My 3rd birth was an easy hospital birth, but I remember arguing with nurses. Not fun. At that point, I had heard of homebirth and vowed that any more children, god willing, would be born that way.

My 4th, 5th & 6th were all wonderful homebirths.

[*Melissa*]

My first birthing experience was incredible and so wonderful. It was a homebirth, 18 1/2 hours of labor, I slept between each contraction for the first 6 hours, labored wonderfully in the arms of DH for a few hours, gave birth in my bed, safe at home.

I am hoping my #2 will be just as great!

[LaLaLuna]

My first birth was a hospital birth- it was a mixed bag but overall I'd say positive and with an excellent outcome.

I arrived fully dilated... and he was breech. My OB and I had discussed the possibility of breech beforehand and he was supportive of my having a vag. birth as long as he wasn't footling, which he wasn't. So OB was awesome, some of the nursing staff not so much. But one nurse just happened to have spent 20 years as a lay midwife before going into nursing and she was TREMENDOUS!

It was a hard, fast birth (except for the pushing part; breech babies take a while! LOL) and he was born unmedicated and healthy. And hungry.


So...considering that I was in a hospital and he was breech, it was a great birth! I was lucky to have a doula (a retired midwife and not about to take sh*t from anyone) and an open minded OB. I was lucky to have a nurse on my team who had homebirth experience and understood where I was coming from.

If I had it to do all over again, I would not be so nice and quiet with some of the more mainstream nurses who tried to steam roll me. I work in a hospital now so I can understand the mindset some of the staff gets into... and I also understand better now that as the "patient" I have the final word in what goes. Period. And I dont' have to be nice about it.

Second birth was at home and in a tub; 180 degrees from the first birth (really really short- and easy!) but I am so grateful for that first experience. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

[grumpybear]

I have had only one birth to date but even if things did not go as planned, I still think that overall it was a good birth.
I had a hospital transfer (planned on giving birth at a freestanding birth center) and got induced with Pitocin but I think it went pretty ok.

[kerikadi]

Another great first birth in a hospital but that was back in 1992 before the age of pitocin and constant monitoring.

I have several friends that had great first births but they were all home or birth center.