Birthdays in Dec: Half-birthdays in June? (Xpost with Childhood)

[marsmom]

I came on today to ask for feedback on holding a half-birthday in June for a December-born dd to avoid having her birthday caught up in all the holiday craziness. Then saw there's a great thread already in The Childhood Years today on December birthdays. So I did put in my thoughts there - and we have had very nice birthday parties so far in December.

But I would love some feedback here from anyone who has tried successfully or not to hold a half-birthday. I just feel like the time may have come for us to try something new - new time of year, better weather, less stress, less competition on our time. DD just seems a bit overwrought this year - having trouble getting to sleep, very overcome by the the "gimmes", not her usual self - and I can't help but feel that having her birthday jammed into the middle of her school's xmas fair and her xmas pageant and countless other holiday events was just all a bit too much for her and lost its specialness. So does the half-birthday sound great but have road bumps in implementing?

[rubyeta]

My boys b-days are the 21st and 23rd. I have never done a half birthday, i guess thats because i dont think that we could go past their real birthday without some sort of celebration (special dinner, cake and ice cream etc.) I am not one for throwing them big parties though.

[MillingNome]

Both my kids wer born within a couple weeks of Christmas. We do not do half birthdays, never even considered doing half birthdays. I just make sure that the day is special and screw whatever holiday madness may be happening

[UUMom]

My winter kids were born the end of Nov, Jan, & Feb. I have one summer b'day. We've never done 1/2 b'days, and its' not ever been an issue, even though they are side by side with hilidays and many people are partied out. We celebrate on the day-- with their fav food for supper. My one child w/ a summer b'day comes at a time when many folks are away, and it still manages to be a lovely time.

Your birthday is your birthday.

[mirlow]

My birthday is on the 25th. My mom always gave me a present on my half bday. I usually had some slumber party in June as well. It was pretty low key, but fun!

I've never liked having my birthday on Christmas. I'm starting to make the most of it. For the past few years we've been going to a movie and out to dinner.

I think I have too many bad memories of birthday presents wrapped in Christmas paper or people trying to combine the events into one present.

[whateverdidiwants]

My brothers were both born in December, so they had half-birthday parties instead of "regular" ones. None of their friends were ever around for their actual birthdays because of Christmas, so by moving it they had pool parties when their friends would actually be around.

[soygurl]

One of my best childhood friends was born on dec 27th. When we were kids he ALWAYS had his birthday party on his half birthday. On his real birthday they would have a very small, low key celebration (a present of 2, special dinner or movie, just family and maybe one friend). Then on his half birthday he'd have a huge blow out party. That's just how his mom liked things; a really fun lady who loves big celebrations and extravagence.

My birthday is nov 27th so it sometimes falls on thanksgiving, or at least within a week of it so my birthday party was rarely on my birthday, and often has a small turn out. I remember wishing I could do the half birthday thing that my friend did so I could have a beach party or some other "summer" thing, but my mom wasn't into that. Becides, birthday wasn't next to a "gifting" holliday so it didn't present the same problems (combining gifts, etc.).

I guess what I'm trying to say is, go for it and do the half birthday thing if you want, but be prepared for some issues with people who know when her reall birthday is... I'd let family and close friends know ahead of time that you don't want birthday presents on her real birthday this year, but maybe offer to remind them in june so they don't forget her b-day altogether. Also, be prepared that once you switch to half birthday celebrations, it may be very hard to switch back! People might get confused and think you're being greedy and trying to have two celebrations for one child.

[nolonger]

We thought about doing half-birthdays but never did. ds's birthday is January 3, which he and I think is probably the absolute worst; not only is everyone broke from Christmas, but they're also hung over from New Year's and the last thing they want to do is take their kids to a birthday party.

He's never gotten much in the way of presents, usually just something pulled out of the Christmas stash at the last minute and wrapped in birthday paper and his parties have always been very small and low-key.

He did have a friend who was born on Christmas Day for awhile, and the two boys stuck together with their "crappy birthdays" and always remembered to give each other BIRTHDAY presents and do some sort of a combined party on ds's birthday, even if it was just the two of them.

One year I even tried to "pass" on Christmas so that I would have more time and energy for ds's birthday, but it didn't work out; my parents did not respect my wishes and he wound up opening CHRISTMAS presents by himself while I sat in another room crying because I didn't get him anything at all. That was the year dd was living with my mother and she started resenting helping us out financially and thinking that homeschooling and me in general were a complete waste of money and hating me for staying at home with my kidsz all these years instead of going the daycare/pampers/formula/public school route.

The money I saved from not doing Christmas wound up going for bills so he didn't get much of a birthday anyway,.

So I say go for it for the half-birthday party with her friends! Never forget her real birthday and dig out the baby books and the birth stories and give her a small, meaningful gift then, but do have a celebration in the summer so she gets the attention and fun that all the other kids get.

dd was born in March. I know it's kind of hard to think of an early February birthday as being to close to Christmas, but that's how it felt to me growing up and watching my sister's June birthday being a big celebration and mine being as inexpensive and quiet as my family could possibly get away with.

And from one mother of a Christmas baby to another, don't forget to share with your dd how much your concept of the Baby Jesus story changed and deepened after your pregnancy and birth; we aren't Christian here, but I know I can never think about that story without understanding what that homeless unwed teen Mom went through leading up to her UC in a barn.

[snarfywarning]

In our little city-wide mom publication there was a letter from a mom about this.

She said that they do both, and in the summer they have a "half" birthday party, serve a cut in half cake, with the regular amount of candles plus a "half" candle (I am guessing it is shorter than the rest) sing half the birthday song, and then have a big party with her friends in the summer.

It sounded cool to me

[Marcee]

We have Dec. 8th and Dec. 9th here and we do not do half birthdays.

[BAU3]

My ds's bday is the 23.. so far it has not been an issue. We treat b-day all the same.. its your day and you're treated with extra kindness.. you choose what you want to eat for all meals.. get a cake and a few gifts.. usually one being a kind of big something that was requested. Partys have always been sort of secondary... a few friends for a ski party or something...

The real specialness comes from how we treat the birthday child, tho.And that you can do any day of the year.

[Billycatmom]

My twins birthday is 12/26. I never felt the need to celebrate their birthday at a different time. On the 26th we have a simple family birthday celebration with cake, their birthday presents, etc. Earlier in the month they have birthday parties (the past two years they've had sleepover parties, one weekend for my sons, the following for his sister). Invites go out in mid November and the parties are always scheduled to be held before winter break starts.

The only thing I don't do is have cake or similar goodies for Christmas. We have a cake for their birthday the following day so that's enough goodies in this house.

[Twinklefae]

I was born Dec 25. I have never done a half birthday, and now I'm really glad of it. Once I graduated from high school, my birthday becme the one time of year that all my friends would get together. I still throw an annual party, and I still have friends that I only see once a year, we all count on it!

[KatetheWonderful]

My son's birthday is Nov. 29th and from the ages of 5-10 we did a half, one-third, sometimes two thirds birthday party for him to invite friends. We always had a good time and could play outside. On his birthday we have a small family party, special food, etc. I wanted to have the energy to have fun parties that we could plan together and durning the holiday season, I just didn't have it. Now that he is 13, we have a family birthday and he will sometimes have a friend or two over for video games or a movie.

[aniT]

I didn't read all the post but as someone whose birthday is Christmas Eve, I had to respond!!!

My brother's birthdays are June 6th and 7th. Up until I was 9 years old I always got one gift on my brother's birthday. Not really a half birthday, just a gift on his day. (my baby brother was born when I was 7 so I don't think of him so much when I remember this. )

When I was 10 and it was my brother's BD I asked my mom where my gift was. She said I was old enough to understand why he got gifts on MY birthday and I didn't need one anymore. I was kinda POed. While I might understand why he got gives on my day.. I still didn't get a special BD.

To this day me and even my husband/family think that Christmas and my birthday are the same thing. I can't even tell you what was a BD gift and what was a Christmas gift.

So do everything you can to make your daughter birthday SEPARATE from Christmas. If you want to have a half birthday in June go for it. Even if it is just one gift and a slumber party.. at least she wont feel that her birthday and Christmas are the same thing.

[Tigeresse]

Originally Posted by UUMom

Your birthday is your birthday.

ITA.

We love our December b-days (dh, ds2, and me). Considering we have 2 dc born in June, the half b-day thing would never work!

We love celebrating and honoring the season associated with our b-days. It celebrates what was happening on the earth the day we entered. We Dec. babies think it's kind of cool seeing the whole world decorated and sparkling throughout the month of our birth. Such a festive, cozy month! Both ds and I had beautiful snow falls on our b-days this year.

For ds, our parties since he was about 3 yo (he is 12 now) have been gingerbread house making. It is now a tradition that he and his friends love. We have always had a winter/holiday theme kind of tied in with his b-day and he totally digs it. I often tell him about the blizzard outside the day he was born, as well as the cozy fire and twinkling holiday lights that created the atmosphere at his birth. I do the same in honoring the season of my spring/summer babies. It is what it is and it's all good.