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need hugs...feeling low  

post #1 of 21
12/16/07 at 12:38pm
Thread Starter 
having a hard day...for no rational reasons at all...
post #2 of 21
12/16/07 at 12:46pm




Peace mama.
post #3 of 21
12/16/07 at 1:24pm


::::

i hope you feel sunnier soon...in the meantime, hope this brings a smile to your face...even if temporarily...i'm so sorry you are having a rough time right now. huge HUGS mama.
post #4 of 21
12/16/07 at 1:32pm
many warm your way!!
post #5 of 21
12/16/07 at 1:33pm
Big hugs, Jessica! Hope you're feeling better soon.
post #6 of 21
12/16/07 at 3:35pm
how are you feeling now, mama? thinking of you...just wanted to check in w/ you...

love,
lis
post #7 of 21
12/16/07 at 3:39pm
post #8 of 21
12/16/07 at 4:06pm
Thread Starter 
Now I remember why I cried when we found out we were pregnant again...

I'm no good at this under the best of conditions. But, with a baby and a 2 year old, I'm a disaster... And, my 7 year old is being completely neglected. My nipples are in so much pain. I can't even get a good latch with the baby because I'm being mauled by dd2. And her latch is a wreck.

I've been having to make her wait while the baby is on the less sore side. Just a few minutes ago she was sobbing and slapping his head and trying to pull him off of my breast.

What am I going to do when dh goes back to work? I don't know how we'll make it when he's gone in the middle of the night...

He really needs to go in for just one night this week, but he's worried that we won't be okay. So, he's totally stressed out and our house is filled with negative energy. I know that I'm being very codependent...it's hard not to be right now. His feelings are his.

We've been planning to go to a church service this afternoon, but I really don't want to go. I just don't have the energy to deal with anyone. But, I also don't want to start down the path of isolating myself.

Olorun is 2 weeks old today...
post #9 of 21
12/16/07 at 4:25pm
oh sweetie! i feel for you so much! i feel so neglectful of megh too since sheamas was born and it breaks my heart. like in bed, i turn my back to her as i nurse him while lying down when i'm so exhausted and i feel just awful. it isn't the same anymore, isn't just her and i...we are both adjusting. i'm trying to find our new 'way' of life together...its so frustrating i know, when you want so much to love on your older dc but need to tend to the younger one(s) and they have to wait...often in TEARS or rage. ugh do i know this well so far the past almost 3 wx. your low feelings sure seem VERY rational to me the more you share what's goin' on for you and the kids and DH...TOTALLY rational actually. you've got a lot on your plate mama.

gosh i don't know what to tell you except take it easy as you can and know we are here. can you work more on latch so you can have some relief? you sound like you need a real good cry and a humungous group hug. take a hot bath when you can...that may make you feel sooooooooo good!
post #10 of 21
12/16/07 at 4:41pm
You're not alone... a lot of us are struggling. I feel like I am great at being pregnant, but suck at post partum. I'm trying to take it one moment at a time and not worrying about what will happen in a day, or week, or month.

Hang in there. It has to keep getting easier.
post #11 of 21
12/16/07 at 4:47pm
It will get easier! Not easy, but 7 weeks in, the world looks so much different now! Many hugs!
post #12 of 21
12/16/07 at 5:50pm


You're not alone. I've been struggling, too. Keep pluggin' away, it will get easier!
post #13 of 21
12/17/07 at 12:40am
Do you think you're struggling with ppd? Have you talked to your mw/dr? I cried too when I found out I was pregnant with dd2. My first two were 18 months apart, not planned, and it sucked. It was so hard. They're both babies. This time is going much better for me (at least mentally), but there's still not enough of me to go around. I know where you're at, I've been there.
post #14 of 21
12/17/07 at 12:42am
One more thing to keep in mind, I think from 2-3 weeks pp seemed to be the hardest for most of us. If you go back a few weeks and look at the threads, there were many posted about baby nursing constantly or fussing/crying constantly. It seems to be a transitional time for the babies, coming out of that newborn constant sleepiness, but not knowing what to do when they're awake. I promise in a few weeks, the world should be starting to look a bit brighter.
post #15 of 21
12/17/07 at 12:50am
I was also not ok when I found out, did not even tell hubby for weeks as I tried to come to the all to real terms of it all.

I have a 8 year old homeschooler.... and a 2 year old son. Goddess I would be a mess if he where still nursing now. (((((Hugs))))) That must be so hard, not time to yourself, no time with just new baby, and feeling like you have no time or energy for your other now more needy then ever DC.

For me I have to believe that moms have been doing this for so very long and their older kids dealing with this same thing that it is not as damaging as maybe we feel it is. Maybe it is a time for them to grow a little as well. This coming from a oldest child myself with a brother 2 years younger and a sister 10 years younger. I learned to value and treasure my time alone. Not that any of this will make you feel any better, but sometimes it helps me to think about the hystery of man kind and my own childhood.

We know your an amazing mom, and we also know amazing moms have real reasons to cry too!
post #16 of 21
12/17/07 at 12:52am
Quote:
Originally Posted by scheelimama View Post
One more thing to keep in mind, I think from 2-3 weeks pp seemed to be the hardest for most of us. If you go back a few weeks and look at the threads, there were many posted about baby nursing constantly or fussing/crying constantly. It seems to be a transitional time for the babies, coming out of that newborn constant sleepiness, but not knowing what to do when they're awake. I promise in a few weeks, the world should be starting to look a bit brighter.
Oh, that is so true! I'm at 6 weeks now and things are so much brighter. HUGS to you, Jessica!!!
post #17 of 21
12/17/07 at 1:05am
I second what Alisha said... we're at three weeks old and baby is super fussy. My MW says 3 to 4 weeks is "make or break" time... if you've made it this far you can do it!
post #18 of 21
12/17/07 at 3:07am
Jessica, many hugs. I know where you're at with the tandem nursing, and the whining toddler and the baby on the breast all the time or fussing all the time. We were there a few weeks ago and I didn't have any other kids to deal with on top of that.

The baby has gotten much less fussy and more alert and fun now so there is that to look forward to. A friend of mine who just had her second told me that she felt guilty for months about how her oldest felt after the baby arrived and how the baby didn't get the same attention as her first (and I'm sure when you add a third to the mix, it gets even more chaotic). But she realized, albeit many months later, that, much as Kimmy said, it is a time for the kids to grow a little - it's hard on them but worth while in the end.

And try to make sure you do something, no matter how little, for yourself everyday - even if it's just shave your armpits or read the mail.
post #19 of 21
12/17/07 at 3:36am
It will get better Mama! You need some time to adjust.

Sending a warm hug your way
post #20 of 21
12/17/07 at 11:58am
Thread Starter 
Thank you so much for the wise words, Mamas. I'm taking things one moment at a time, today.
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