Would this bug you? (fighting mentionned)

[kathymuggle]

DS is in grade 6. He goes to school part time. He does not attend during French time.

There is a school trip in Gr. 6 - technically it is associated with the French program, but all children seem to go (even those who are excused from French).

At the beginning of the yr, I asked the school is DS could go on the trip (he wants to). The school said yes.

Today the school calls - they ask me if anyone has answered my question yet about whether Ds can go on the trip. I say yes and I say who. They say they are "thinking about" whether to let the non-French attending kids go.

I am not amused - but thankfully they call back 5 minutes later and say Ds can go. They go on that Ds must keep his nose clean - no fighting on the school yard if he wants to go on the trip. WTF? DS has had 3 detentions this year - none for fighting. He has had 2 physical altercations on the school yard this year - but neither one meritted a detention. I do not think he is innocent - but if he has a fighting problem, it is a suprise to me AND they have not let me know. As I think about it, I am starting to get ticked off.

Ds has been taught to fight only to defend himself. We feel that is his right, as a person. We are trying to let him exercise his judgement about when being physical is appropriate.

The school is trying to use the trip as a reward - well, Ds is not a dog! The decision to fight is one made regardless of reward or punishment - and should only be done as a last resort/self-defense!

I am also getting the feeling the school does not want Ds to go on the trip. He is a great guy. I think they might be trying to punish us for part-time HS.

UGH.

Am I reading between the lines too much? WWYD?

Kathy

[kmeyrick]

I don't think they're punishing you for hsing- but as a teacher I'm reading between the lines and it sounds like they are trying to control a group of kids going and your son has been lumped in to "make it fair." Yeah, that would bug me. Offer to chaperone, that'll shut them up.

[CarrieMF]

I do think you are reading between the lines, especially since you've had issues with the school for a long time.

You said they were deciding whether the kids not in French were going, that would include your son since he is not in French. Since technically what the trip is IS a French trip it makes sense if they are thinking of changing the rules to it being ONLY those in French.

As for the fighting question, the physical altercations are classed as fighting whether it was self defense or not. They may not have to the point of detention but they still go on record for the year. I would also ask the school if there were any other altercations or anything that you have not been notified about so you have a heads up.

[kathymuggle]

[QUOTE=CarrieMF;10036411]I do think you are reading between the lines, especially since you've had issues with the school for a long time.

Fair enough, lol.

I guess I am more ticked over the threat to revoke the trip. Umm....if he had been in suffecient physical altercations that you would threaten to remove a much waited for trip - you would think they would have told me before this!

Also...if it really is self defense...are you supposed to lose a trip out of self defense?

[CarrieMF]

I guess I am more ticked over the threat to revoke the trip. Umm....if he had been in suffecient physical altercations that you would threaten to remove a much waited for trip - you would think they would have told me before this!

I agree. It may have been the opinion of the person you spoke to.

Also...if it really is self defense...are you supposed to lose a trip out of self defense?

Depends on school policy. If it is any fighting then yes you'd lose out on a field trip even if it was self defense & I think most schools would be like this becuase sometimes it's hard to find out who really was the instigator.

[blizzard_babe]

Hmm... I can see how fighting COULD be a no-go for a field trip (basically, my feeling is if I can't trust a student to be safe at school, I probably can't trust them to be safe elsewhere, and field trips are generally much less structured and afford far more freedom of motion), but it doesn't sound like your son is unsafe. Whatever happened didn't even merit a detention... it couldn't have been anywhere NEAR bad enough to make him untrustworthy on a field trip.

Does sound like they're using the trip as a "carrot."

[kathymuggle]

You hit the nail on the head.

I would not expect them to bring someone who was constantly fighting....but Ds isn't! (and if he is,which i sincerely doubt, they have not informed me). It is using the trip as a carrot.

Oh well. I have discussed it with DS, and am letting it go. ohhhmmmm (I need a meditating mama smilie)

kathy