Finding balance..... part time schools?

[westcoastmom]

I have 3 kids, aged 3, 4 and 6. They have never been in school other than Japanese preschool with a class of 6 over the summer.

After 3 long distance moves in 3 years (2 of them in the last year) I feel like my kids are out of control and I rarely if ever get to the homeschooling. I spend all my time trying to get them to do simple things like get dressed, brush their hair, get in the car so we can go do an errand. Case in point. This morning we are supposed to be baking cookies to give to the food delivery man that comes tomorrow. It is now 10:30, one is dressed and as usual we are going nowhere fast and have got nothing done.

I am still trying to unpack (and have been for 3 looonnnng years!) get stuff put away and organized so we can do stuff. The whole house is a mess, and I know I need to get the house organized so I can get them to get organized but we never seem to get anywhere.

I am planning to go back one day a week in September after we make our last long distance move. DH will be commuting weekends by plane so I plan to get an au pair. I want to homeschool, but I'm in serious need of a break after 3 years following dh's wretched career around (with it's long hours, extra days of work)

Is there such a thing as part time schools? How do others find balance?

[Mary-Beth]

Sorry...I wish I had a useful response.
I'm wondering the same thing...only I didn't move. I have 2 kids who are 5.5 and 4 and I'm pregnant. I feel most of our time is spent resolving conflicts and just getting through the day.

Is there anyone who could come over and give you some help? Take them out to play while you do some stuff in the house?
I called another homeschooling family and just dropped my 2 kids off there for a playdate. It's so nice...not a long term solution but something for now.

Hoping others have some ideas!!

[RiverSky]

You can probably get a professional organizer in for one day for $100 or $150, I think that might be a very good place to start. At for p/t schools...I find that they are not as helpful as they might seem, simply because once you factor in all the getting dressed and driving there and picking up...you lose so much time....

I find that for any stay-at-home mom, sometimes getting a mothers-helper in (a neighborhood teen (13 or 14 year old) who will come and play with the children in one room for 2 hours, while you clean or organize or sleep, is often a really good and fairly inexpensive sanity-saver. But the thing that helped me most of all was getting involved in moms groups, going to every single event they had, getting out of the house at least 3 or 4 mornings a week (it's amazing how much less mess there is in the house when you're not in it!).

Good luck.

[muse]

there is a part time school here in the bay area where a number of homeschoolers send their kids a couple of days a week...probably not much help to you, but it does exist.

[oceanbaby]

Originally Posted by muse

there is a part time school here in the bay area where a number of homeschoolers send their kids a couple of days a week...probably not much help to you, but it does exist.

Where?

My understanding of these "schools" is that you still have to register as a homeschooler because part time school does not satisfy truancy regulations. But if there were part time schools, we would sign up!

[muse]

Originally Posted by oceanbaby

Where?

http://www.wildcatcommunityfreeschool.org/


not much info on the website but lots of reviews here:

http://parents.berkeley.edu/recommen...s/wildcat.html

[greenthumb3]

Okay, seconding/thirding what other have written: get some breaks from the kiddos! Au pair, trade with friends', etc. Take that time and make some very focused goals. I just finished unpacking stuff we've had and we've been in this home for 2 years. I went room by room, and did end up tossing a lot of what was unneeded. And tell yourself, whatever it is you want to do, YOU CAN DO IT!

FWIW, I have been waiting for my DH to get started with his career for about 5 years. He landed a great job this year. We have children ages 5,3 and 5 months. He commutes out of state every other week for 4 days and 3 LONG nights (I estimate some of my days have been about 17 hours long from start to finish). When he is in town, he is in his office mostly, unless he get out for a bathroom break or snack. Often, he is rushing to get a deadline met, but *surprise*! Another deadline appears. But, he's always been a workaholic. At least now, I have somehow accepted that fact. Most recently, he's really started to get into playing with the kids, something we've all needed: daddy time, and I've even has a Saturday off now and then.

I don't mean to say, "hey, compared to me, you have it easy" I mean to say, "hey, if it's possible for me and we muddle through, that increases the chances you can too!"

What helps me through??

1. I know what I want. I am clear about what is important to me. If I am positive that I really want this life, it's easier to find ways to muddle through. If I am not sure or committed to the goal of homeschooling, I'm miserable. I also remind myself that p.s wouldn't change the fact that I am a mom and it's harder to pull kids out of school and hs than to just bite the proverbial bullet and do it from the start. Public school is a short time solution and I remind myself that even though right now can be VERY hard, the results are worth it. Plus, sending the kids to school (well, one kindergartener and one preschooler) would not eradicate my problems, just give me a different set. And most of the time things don't feel so bad. I take each moment at a time and try to look for the good things that happen and minimize the bad. Keeps me sane.

Not everyone's the same, so do what works best for your family. But be sure, commit, move forward. If needed, get some support for your decisions or write down your doubts and then read some homeschooling article online that address those concerns. Read an article from your favorite homeschool magazine. Reading Home Ed. totally gets me motivated and is worth the subscription to me. Meet some other hsing families in your community.

2. Set goals. Whatever you can do, go for it. If it's just, "Keep dishes going, laundry going, get 2 hours alone a week, then do one project a week", that's it. But do it every week. You'll be amazed at what you get done in a month that way. And every little bit counts: that's one project that will be done that won't have to be done again. Enlist your kids to help, in whatever way they can. Develop a daily routine that works for you. Some people like FlyLady. I am my own flylady, and figure out what works for me.

3. Look outside the home for help. Others here have mentioned great ideas. If you can afford hired help that you trust, yea! I have participated in a co-op preschool where I got 2 hours twice a week with just two kids. Ahhhh. He also made friends, and now that preschool has ended, he goes over to friends' homes often or has one over. It's amazing what I can get done while the kids play. They keep each other occupied, as long as there is stuff to do (backyard, playdough, dressup, video game, etc)

Another thing I've done is hooked up with a bunch of other moms who are home during the day and we've set up a co-op babysitting group. Each day from 9-12 one of us takes a day during the month to watch kids. When we watch kids, we collect tickets, and can spend them when we drop off our kids to another mom. It sounds hard to start. This can work if you have a small group of people you know reasonably well. I have found most mothers jump at the chance to do this, and very few decline. It's worth a try: free help and making friends for the kiddos.

4. Be nice to yourself. Relax now if that is what you need to do. Accept whatever expectations you may have are not being met right now, and that's okay. Talk to other homeschoolers who have taken breaks due to a new baby, illness, moving, etc. Ask them how long it took to "catch up" with missed "homeschool studies". I think you'll find that even if you feel behind, once you do get rolling, things will pick up quickly and the kids will be fine. But talk to someone who has experience with that, It may ease your worries that way, or you might get some ideas.

BEST WISHES!!