Dec. to March behavior deterioration

[numinous]

This is going to sound really weird, but my DD (5 yrs 3 mos) goes through a really horrible time every Dec to March. This is the 3rd year, and it's starting now.

What I see: tantrums, not listening/co-operating, defiance, testing and challenging, greed, rudeness, screaming versus using words.

Possible reasons: holidays, extra sugar, not enough physical exercise, too many gifts/sugar - temptations.

This change comes out of the blue - my DD is usually so well behaved that I don't "discipline" her a whole lot. Every December I feel like I need to get discipline books out and "figure it out". It also get so bad that at for the last two years by March I'm ready to take her to therapy.

Does this happen to anyone else's children? It just seems so strange and bizarre. Is there a marker point developmentally at X years and 3 months?

I'm just curious - thanks for your thoughts.

Jessica

[moodymaximus]

i remember reading that the half-years are the times for developmental leaps. maybe. all the reasons you list are certainly valid as well. how dark does it get where you are? maybe the lack of sunlight affects her?

Originally Posted by numinous

This is going to sound really weird, but my DD (5 yrs 3 mos) goes through a really horrible time every Dec to March. This is the 3rd year, and it's starting now.

What I see: tantrums, not listening/co-operating, defiance, testing and challenging, greed, rudeness, screaming versus using words.

Possible reasons: holidays, extra sugar, not enough physical exercise, too many gifts/sugar - temptations.

This change comes out of the blue - my DD is usually so well behaved that I don't "discipline" her a whole lot. Every December I feel like I need to get discipline books out and "figure it out". It also get so bad that at for the last two years by March I'm ready to take her to therapy.

Does this happen to anyone else's children? It just seems so strange and bizarre. Is there a marker point developmentally at X years and 3 months?

I'm just curious - thanks for your thoughts.

Jessica

[numinous]

My neighbor suggested a lack of sunlight, and I am considering that. We live in New York City, and it's not all that dark or cold, but I won't rule it out.

My BF said that you could purchase full-spectrum lightbulbs, so I am going to get some.

The behavior is getting worse. Today she woke up nasty and snarky. I am remembering last year how awful it was. Last year there were serious regressions and she had alot of symptoms of PTSD! It got really bad.

It's becoming evident to me that this is not developmental, it's emotional.

[mamazee]

My daughter has more trouble in the winter too. I have to make sure she still has lots of opportunities for physical play, and I have to get her out of the house pretty regularly. So long as I do those things (which can be pretty challenging) she's about the same as the rest of the year. Which is still pretty wild, but also sweet.

Different things might cause this problem for different kids so you might have to try a few things before you find a solution, but I bet one is out there. Good luck!

[mamazee]

Oh - something else I thought of. In nice weather, my daughter plays outside in the mud and sand and what-not. A lot. She really needs sensory activities of that level for inside in bad weather, or she falls apart - one tantrum after another all day if she isn't stimulated enough. So I also have play-dough, rice and cups, finger paints, lots of messy art stuff, anything I can think of like that.

[Yooper]

This happens with my dd too! It is also the "half-year" so who knows? I have always chalked it up to darkness, cold weather, and not enough outdoor play. In the summer, we are outside all day long and there is a lot of physical play. Where we live, winter really restricts our activities and we are only getting 7 hours of sunlight a day right now. It is definately hard on me and many of my friends suffer from SAD, so it makes sense that it would affect kids too. Dd is old enough this year to get into some more winter activities. I take her skating at least once a week, more if I can. I try to get her out to sled once a day. And we have also started her on cc skis which we try to do at least once a week and more if we can get there. We even take walks if the roads are safe enough (from crazy cars on ice....we have no sidewalks). The thing is, we can have entire weeks when the weather is too nasty to do anything outside. I cannot in good conscious take dd skiing when it is -5 degrees with a 30 mph wind on top of that. And it can be that way for weeks at a time. She definately gets stir crazy.

[numinous]

Thank you for your replies. I do think that some of it is stir-craziness. I am going out today to sign her up for swimming and dance (two things she really loves!)

Jessica

[Glittergal]

My daughter sounds like she could be your daughter's clone. She also has issues with outdoor play in less than ideal weather. We've been noticing this behaviour every winter since she was 2 and I'm always amazed how it ends with the sun coming out. The more I read about SAD, the more I am convinced it is the darker weather or just lack of sunlight that affects her. We lived in MD, so didn't even have severe weather. I've found daily walks help, like to the library or a friend's house. We are trying to come up with special "winter" activities, like tea time (she loves mint tea) and this yr, we've moved to northern UK, where it is REALLY dark, we have a light therapy lamp, which I SWEAR makes us all feel alot better. I turn it on when my kids are playing...you can find them at www.verilux.com
Good luck!!!!