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Jan '08 Lower Income and/or Struggling Mama's Support - Page 8

post #141 of 689
We received a shut-off notice for our electric today If we don't pay them $365 by the 10th, they're shutting our electric off. Great. I called and told them I have 3 small children and no way to pay that much, but they don't care. They won't give me a payment plan or anything. I told them that it's against state law to shut off our power since we have small children and the temps are regularly dropping below 32 degrees. Their reply? "We don't care. We just shut off power in 40 homes right before Christmas. The electric company doesn't have to follow state law." They were freaking BRAGGING about it! I'm turning them in to the attorney general. Um, hello? Nobody is above state law, jackass.

My mom is going to pay the bill but I'm turning them in anyway. I don't like it when people f$^# with me.
post #142 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Sweeties1Angel View Post
We received a shut-off notice for our electric today If we don't pay them $365 by the 10th, they're shutting our electric off. Great. I called and told them I have 3 small children and no way to pay that much, but they don't care. They won't give me a payment plan or anything. I told them that it's against state law to shut off our power since we have small children and the temps are regularly dropping below 32 degrees. Their reply? "We don't care. We just shut off power in 40 homes right before Christmas. The electric company doesn't have to follow state law." They were freaking BRAGGING about it! I'm turning them in to the attorney general. Um, hello? Nobody is above state law, jackass.

My mom is going to pay the bill but I'm turning them in anyway. I don't like it when people f$^# with me.
I don't get it -- who do they think the law applies to? Good for you for turning them in.
post #143 of 689
I can't believe the electric company doesn't think that the law applies to them... good for you for turning them in!!!

Well, we have found a place to move to... it will be hard but for our sanity we need our own place. Also, the landlords are taking money of the rent every month in exchange for DF and our boss doing work on the property. Plus, my office will be in the house and the work truck will be parked there so we won't have much gas usage at all. I am also looking for a child or 2 to watch for some extra money. I have sooooo much stuff to do this week... classes started today, I need to find out if the house has DSL or cable, utilities need to be switched, I have a bunch of work stuff to do and I need to sort through all our crap and start packing and getting rid of stuff. Ack!!
post #144 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by ediesmom View Post
i don't know but i can say that it will work out. There is catholic charities, churches, housing......you need to apply for those, but i assume you will qualify. can you renegotiate your car payment? Or public housing complex? one that has a sliding fee scale?



more later
Yeah subsidized housing would GREATLY fix my problem but there's over a year long waiting list right now for all complexes unfortunately. And I dont' know of any way to get higher on the list other than be compeltely homeless which I can't do with a 3 year old, 7 year old, and a newborn.
post #145 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Sweeties1Angel View Post
We received a shut-off notice for our electric today If we don't pay them $365 by the 10th, they're shutting our electric off. Great. I called and told them I have 3 small children and no way to pay that much, but they don't care. They won't give me a payment plan or anything. I told them that it's against state law to shut off our power since we have small children and the temps are regularly dropping below 32 degrees. Their reply? "We don't care. We just shut off power in 40 homes right before Christmas. The electric company doesn't have to follow state law." They were freaking BRAGGING about it! I'm turning them in to the attorney general. Um, hello? Nobody is above state law, jackass.

My mom is going to pay the bill but I'm turning them in anyway. I don't like it when people f$^# with me.
i'm glad your mom can help

i cannot believe the EC! jerks....I hope something comes of your complaint....

Quote:
Originally Posted by chely7425 View Post
I can't believe the electric company doesn't think that the law applies to them... good for you for turning them in!!!

Well, we have found a place to move to... it will be hard but for our sanity we need our own place. Also, the landlords are taking money of the rent every month in exchange for DF and our boss doing work on the property. Plus, my office will be in the house and the work truck will be parked there so we won't have much gas usage at all. I am also looking for a child or 2 to watch for some extra money. I have sooooo much stuff to do this week... classes started today, I need to find out if the house has DSL or cable, utilities need to be switched, I have a bunch of work stuff to do and I need to sort through all our crap and start packing and getting rid of stuff. Ack!!
Yay! sounds good...except the actual moving
post #146 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by swellmomma View Post
sounds stressful. Is there anyway you can do dayhome for a few months after baby is born before returning to school? You would earn enough to pay bills with no daycare fees and be home with baby a few months? I know it is hard to suddenly be in a lurch when it comes to work/childcare but it's not up to your IL's to watch the kids for you. Sadly you will have to find daytime work and put the kids in childcare. How old is your older child? As for paying bills, rent etc if and when you go to school is there anyway you can take in a room mate? That would cover half the rent and utilities, plus perhaps you can trade off, you do all their laundry and cooking in exchange for 1-2 nights of babysitting. DO you have single parent friends you can start a babysitting co-op with. Trade off babysitting? so let's say 1 watches your kids 2 nights a week, the other watches them the second two nights, then on 2 of your nights off you watch their kids so they can go out, or work or what ever. EVeryone wins with free childcare and a chance to better their families. Do not give up your child support, that is there for the kids they deserve it. Find another way to go to school. Is their low income housing in your city? WHile they are not always the best areas, if it is a temporary situation to reduce your rent while you are in school it may be worth it. From what I have seen on tv, if you clip enough coupons you can get your groceries virtually free which will make things easier for you.

Oh another idea for graoceries, have a cooking bee with your friends. So for example you supply allt he ingredients for 1 food dish with enough servings for each member. SO for example you have 3 friends doing this with you each has a family of 3 so you you need to have enough ingredients to make 12 servings. Buy your ingredients in bulk. SO let's say your dish is meatloaf, you need meat, eggs, oats if you use them and spices. YOu make 4 meatloafs. Friend A makes homemade perogies for example. and on it goes. Then you guys trade. In the end you have only paid for a few pounds of meat and carton of eggs but have 4 homemade dishes for your family ready to go. ALso look into grocery coops. We have some here, I pay $12 for a meat order adn $8 for produce at teh start of the month, int he 3rd week when groceries I bought at the start of the month are running low and so is $$ I pick up my order and have enough meat and fresh produce to get through another couple weeks for little money. Collective kitchens are similiar to the friends cooking Imentioned, we have city run ones, you pay $2/person and go make 6 dishes for your family, so for my family of 4 of us eating we get 6 meals for $8, can't beat that.

If I think of more I will let you know. hang in there, it will work out
Yeah I totally don't fault them. I"m just saying taht obviously it's not up to them to watch my kids 4 nights a week for me. And they won't do it anyway. I didn't even bother to ask because I am certain they won't.
My oldest is 7 and obviously not able to watch her sisters. She is in school but she needs after-school and maybe before-school care. I have one friend who has a son and who is single but she is in a pretty precarious situation herself and she doesn't have a stable home(she's bouncing between relatives homes) so she's in no position to watch my girls. Otherwise I've got no one and no support really. My midwife at the appt today said that when I go into the hospital/birth center(whichever I make it to depending on when I deliver) she will have a note in my chart for a social worker to speak to me before I leave about my situation to see if I qualify for any special programs for single parents or whatever. She said she doesn't know if it will help but it's worth a shot. I am going to try to find a cheaper apartment and some kids to watch soon to help out financially.

Thanks for all the suggestions. I am not trying to shoot them down, I'm just sorta clarifying and talking through it with myself in the post. I do appreciate all the help and the time it took to type it all out.
post #147 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by Iris' Mom View Post
Thanks, I needed some hugs. DD is in therapy, and is on meds, but we're still trying to find the right combo. It's trial and error.



Thanks. My stbx was abusive to them, and I couldn't figure it out. They didn't tell me because I worked so much, they didn't want to stress me out further. I was supposed to protect them, but they were protecting me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Iris' Mom View Post
I did that last year, and the two moms I became "friends" with are the worst offenders. Some stupid incident (supposedly my ds was trying to teach her son how to kiss himself, which proves that my ds must have been molested on top of everything else, which means, so sorry, but they just can't risk exposing their kids to mine) set them off, and now they won't even talk to me. It's reached the point where I don't even want my ds to have playdates for his own protection. I started supervising him on the playground whenever I could to make sure he doesn't get blamed for some mischief that they all cook up. The school is well aware, and they say that it happens all the time that one kid becomes the scapegoat. They told me to go ahead and get him on an IEP so that he could have legal protection, whereas we had been handling everything informally. Don't get me wrong, ds is not an innocent angel, and his behavior IS problematic, but he's not the sociopath that these people seem to think. But it really gets to me that these women KNOW what ds has been through, and have lost all compassion even though, whatever he may have done, ds has NEVER hurt anyone. I was really hurt at first, and now I'm just PO'd. I'm just very lonely here and feeling like my confidence has been betrayed. I'm very shy, and I just don't have the heart to reach out right now.

This has gotten quite long -- thanks for listening.


Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
Poor guy! I'm glad he at least got a little relief last night. At least you know the baking soda bath/benedryl combo works!

So I"m wondering if anyone has any thoughts on this situation because you are all much more educated in the way the "system" works than I am. I am due in 6 weeks. I'm currently a waitress and when I give birth, I will have been there for 5 1/2 months total. You need to be at a job 6 months prior to be eligible for TDI(temporary disability insurance, it's our disability system in RI and you can only get what you pay in as well). So that's out. Obviously there's no paid leave as a waitress. I will still get child support from the husband and from the oldest daughter's father. But those two together are barely enough for rent and gas for the car. I still have phone, car payment, heat, electric, etc. I have medicaid, wic, and food stamps currently. I have a little money saved up right now but that will be enough to keep me out 6 weeks with the child support I will get. I can also file my taxes to get some money to stay out of work. But here's the thing: my husband(soon to be ex) is my daycare right now and I work nights and weekends so it's opposite his schedule AND I can work only the busiest nights and days so that I spend as little time away from the kids as possible(works out to 20-25hours a week and 4 days). But he is deploying voluntarily with the air guard to Kuwait for 6 months. We've known about it for a while now. But there goes my daycare and RI has no second shift daycares that I know of. And my in-laws won't watch all the kids 4 days a week for me. So that leaves me with no one to watch my girls. I think I have to get a full-time day job and put them all in daycare. But I make right around $15-20 an hour as a waitress and the best job I can find right now is full-time $12 an hour PLUS the added cost of daycare. It will be $550 a WEEK for daycare for the kids and they'd be in at least 2 different daycares. And I can't get federal aid until September for going back to school because they don't do that during summer session. So what do I do????? We have a program here that will put me back in school in the fall and give me free child care and PAY for my schooling but I'd give up my child support and have to live off of $400 a month which isn't HALF my rent. So that's impossible and not the right time either. I'm at a loss. I'm panicked. And I've been having a TON of contractions and I've lost my plug and things generally look like I"m expecting Big Bird a lot sooner than previously thought(I'm 33.4weeks now). So now I'm all panicked about how we'll get by. I have SO many bills and SO little income right now but with child support I may make too much for much assistance. I don't know what to do. Any ideas? Anything you guys can think of would be helpful!
Maybe your friend with the son and you could team up...I hope things work out. There is a neat thread in the HH forum (you've probably already checked it) with some great links.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Sweeties1Angel View Post
We received a shut-off notice for our electric today If we don't pay them $365 by the 10th, they're shutting our electric off. Great. I called and told them I have 3 small children and no way to pay that much, but they don't care. They won't give me a payment plan or anything. I told them that it's against state law to shut off our power since we have small children and the temps are regularly dropping below 32 degrees. Their reply? "We don't care. We just shut off power in 40 homes right before Christmas. The electric company doesn't have to follow state law." They were freaking BRAGGING about it! I'm turning them in to the attorney general. Um, hello? Nobody is above state law, jackass.

My mom is going to pay the bill but I'm turning them in anyway. I don't like it when people f$^# with me.
Good for you!

Quote:
Originally Posted by chely7425 View Post
I can't believe the electric company doesn't think that the law applies to them... good for you for turning them in!!!

Well, we have found a place to move to... it will be hard but for our sanity we need our own place. Also, the landlords are taking money of the rent every month in exchange for DF and our boss doing work on the property. Plus, my office will be in the house and the work truck will be parked there so we won't have much gas usage at all. I am also looking for a child or 2 to watch for some extra money. I have sooooo much stuff to do this week... classes started today, I need to find out if the house has DSL or cable, utilities need to be switched, I have a bunch of work stuff to do and I need to sort through all our crap and start packing and getting rid of stuff. Ack!!
Congrats!
post #148 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
Poor guy! I'm glad he at least got a little relief last night. At least you know the baking soda bath/benedryl combo works!

So I"m wondering if anyone has any thoughts on this situation because you are all much more educated in the way the "system" works than I am. I am due in 6 weeks. I'm currently a waitress and when I give birth, I will have been there for 5 1/2 months total. You need to be at a job 6 months prior to be eligible for TDI(temporary disability insurance, it's our disability system in RI and you can only get what you pay in as well). So that's out. Obviously there's no paid leave as a waitress. I will still get child support from the husband and from the oldest daughter's father. But those two together are barely enough for rent and gas for the car. I still have phone, car payment, heat, electric, etc. I have medicaid, wic, and food stamps currently. I have a little money saved up right now but that will be enough to keep me out 6 weeks with the child support I will get. I can also file my taxes to get some money to stay out of work. But here's the thing: my husband(soon to be ex) is my daycare right now and I work nights and weekends so it's opposite his schedule AND I can work only the busiest nights and days so that I spend as little time away from the kids as possible(works out to 20-25hours a week and 4 days). But he is deploying voluntarily with the air guard to Kuwait for 6 months. We've known about it for a while now. But there goes my daycare and RI has no second shift daycares that I know of. And my in-laws won't watch all the kids 4 days a week for me. So that leaves me with no one to watch my girls. I think I have to get a full-time day job and put them all in daycare. But I make right around $15-20 an hour as a waitress and the best job I can find right now is full-time $12 an hour PLUS the added cost of daycare. It will be $550 a WEEK for daycare for the kids and they'd be in at least 2 different daycares. And I can't get federal aid until September for going back to school because they don't do that during summer session. So what do I do????? We have a program here that will put me back in school in the fall and give me free child care and PAY for my schooling but I'd give up my child support and have to live off of $400 a month which isn't HALF my rent. So that's impossible and not the right time either. I'm at a loss. I'm panicked. And I've been having a TON of contractions and I've lost my plug and things generally look like I"m expecting Big Bird a lot sooner than previously thought(I'm 33.4weeks now). So now I'm all panicked about how we'll get by. I have SO many bills and SO little income right now but with child support I may make too much for much assistance. I don't know what to do. Any ideas? Anything you guys can think of would be helpful!
Do you qualify for any cash assistance? Wow, I'm hoping your baby comes 2 weeks late. Is there any way they'd bend the rules for you to qualify for disability, or is this a state rule? Can you try posting an ad on craigslist for a babysitter or maybe a childcare exchange with another single mom? Are there any subsidized daycares? Could your middle child qualify for Headstart? I wish I could think of something else. If only you were one state over . . .
post #149 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
BUT . . . . . . . . .there's always a but isn't there????? I've been having all this random cramping and I think I'm looking my plug. Hmmmmmm. I'm 33.3 weeks along. I think we need big bird in a while longer to bake. BUT there's no cervical changes so far. Just crampiness like a period, I've been in the bathroom ALL.DAY.LONG, and there's a LOT of mucus when I wipe. Now that I've totally TMI'ed everyone out. . . . . . .I think it's just a bit early. And I'm nervous because by this time my water had already broken with Sara and I was in the hospital on antibiotics and steroid shots and she was born at 34.1weeks. So it just makes me a little freaked out. I can't afford to go on maternity leave early as I haven't even looked into disability or filled out paperwork and I have no money for next month's bills. I'm a little panicked.
You're not supposed to get those birthing vibes next! Someone else grab them, quickly!

Quote:
Originally Posted by sandygirl View Post
Anyone know if I can use regular old monisatat cream on her bum? I have that on hand now, vs. it being 30 miles to getting GV or anything else really.
That's what we use on DS's bum when he gets yeast rash, and it works really well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by LilMomma83 View Post
How open are you all with your situation? I have some mama friends that are always planning activities - that cost money, so I always make up excuses why I can't go and then they stop inviting me to do stuff and I feel bad...but I don't want people to pity me or change their plans just because of me...kwim?
We have this problem too... although, generally most of our friends don't have kids so I can always blame lack of child care rather than poverty. On the other hand, it sucks when people just stop calling because they think you don't want to hang out. I know we could have them over here for dinner/board games/something, but since we live so far out from them, I feel weird about that too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by amydidit View Post
Just popping in... I haven't been able to keep up with this thread, wow, it moves fast! I've been dealing with a sick DH and DD2. We think they have whooping cough. We were at my SIL for Christmas and 2 of their DC had tested positive for it. Of course they didn't tell us that until AFTER DH and DD2 got sick. ~grumbles~
Oh no! I'll be thinking good thoughts for a fast recovery. Whooping Cough sucks... it's come through here a couple of times because of the college, and it's not a fun sickness at all. Not that any of them are. :P

Quote:
Originally Posted by Iris' Mom View Post
Thanks. My stbx was abusive to them, and I couldn't figure it out. They didn't tell me because I worked so much, they didn't want to stress me out further. I was supposed to protect them, but they were protecting me.
What a strong mama you are. Hang in there, even if you have to do it second by second.

I'm just going to post gratefuls, since we're doing okay at the moment. It's second-to-second as far as finances, but I'm going to try to stay in "El Mundo Bueno" as long as I can.

1. Rhys and I are doing GREAT as far as postpartum stuff. When he was checked for weight on day 3, he'd lost so little that he wasn't even on the chart... my bottom feels amazing thanks to the midwives choice to use super glue and not stitches on my minor tear... breastfeeding is going well, and he has a solid latch, so my boobs are okay... my gallbladder hasn't regenerated and no other organs have gone bad so far! Seriously, I didn't realize how absolutely TERRIBLE postpartum with Elliot was until I had a 'normal' recovery. I am absolutely beyond grateful for this.

2. I'm fitting into my prepartum pants! AND a friend gave me a couple of nursing bras. They look a lot more like something you'd use to airlift an elephant, but they fit and are cotton and comfy. I was worried about not having anything to wear after the birth, but I think (with judicious use of Christmas Money and the Goodwill) I'll be okay!

3. Our postpartum help, despite getting on my last nerve at least a couple of times a day, has been great. I'm getting reasonable amounts of sleep, and we're eating SO WELL. It's really nice to have friends who are okay with staying in and putzing on the internet and cooking rather than insisting on going out all the time... especially since taking the two boys to the grocery store for milk, eggs, and spaghetti nearly exhausted me. And we've still got to make it to WIC and the Pediatrician this week.
post #150 of 689
Been busy, but joining back in. It's been awhile! Our cc limit went way up, so we have been living off of that for awhile. I am really too ashamed to say that we went over our limit even though I thought we were still under, and now owe all the money from our new bed which we desperately needed this month and I just had a baby!

We are going to have to go try and get a loan to pay the cc bill. Thankfully tax returns aren't too far off and dh should be getting his overtime pay for last semester in February, so we can pay some of that bill off. This is so depressing right now. We took most of the stuff we got for Xmas back to buy groceries for the next month, and got some money from family that we need to use to renew our car registration that is expired, but it's that or groceries...

I hate it how all this debt seems to seep out at the holiday seasons. And dd's bday is next week. I only got her one book and she was already depressed that Santa didn't bring her as much as the other kids (she got a keyboard we saved for for her free piano lessons from dh's work). She is such a big reader and really wanted more new books or a toy. And ds's bday is in less than a month and I have nothing for him.

And with my unexpected hospital visit for this birth, that is a $1200-2000 deductible just for the stay, I don't know about the ER visit and ambulance. And my chiropractor bill is being rejected by our new insurance, so that is coming. *sigh*

Sorry, just had to vent.

I do have a plan, though. Hopefully we can get most of the credit card paid off with tax returns, and his overtime hopefully will cover car registration (he is a teacher, so it will only be a couple hundred $ at most for the overtime). Then he is going to teach a few classes this summer, and we will use that to pay off the medical bills at least in part, cancel the credit card, and hopefully have a little bit of money to use to move and buy a house this August. We got approved for a state loan for a house last year, hopefully we can do the same this year and get another 100% loan with 0 down. That way we can start growing some of our food.
post #151 of 689
Thread Starter 
{{{{{{{{{{Iris' Mom}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Get help for YOU too, counseling or read every book you can on it. YOU will need to heal so that you can help them heal.





Guys I am too tired to update the the list and I am going to be gone alot the next two weeks. I will try to get back on here in the next couple of days and update it, then I will try to keep it updated once or twice a month... it's getting big and sometimes I get daunted and then just tired thinking of it.







{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs for all of you... I will I could solve it all for everyone}}}}}}}}}}
post #152 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thystle View Post
Guys I am too tired to update the the list and I am going to be gone alot the next two weeks. I will try to get back on here in the next couple of days and update it, then I will try to keep it updated once or twice a month... it's getting big and sometimes I get daunted and then just tired thinking of it.
Thystle - if you'd like I can update the list for you while you are gone. I have nothing better to do, honestly. I can just copy and paste into a new post {So I can edit it}, then have you link to it in the origional post.

That way you don't have to worry about it.
post #153 of 689
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by sandygirl View Post
Thystle - if you'd like I can update the list for you while you are gone. I have nothing better to do, honestly. I can just copy and paste into a new post {So I can edit it}, then have you link to it in the origional post.

That way you don't have to worry about it.

You go girl!
post #154 of 689
Thread Starter 
Another round of boxes is going out this week. And I PROMISE to actually mark them this time.
post #155 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by asianyoushi View Post
i dont know if there is a dental college near me... but i need to get 15 teeth filled/drilled....
Call and see if you have a dental college, you will save a ton of money that way!

Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
Poor guy! I'm glad he at least got a little relief last night. At least you know the baking soda bath/benedryl combo works!

So I"m wondering if anyone has any thoughts on this situation because you are all much more educated in the way the "system" works than I am. I am due in 6 weeks. I'm currently a waitress and when I give birth, I will have been there for 5 1/2 months total. You need to be at a job 6 months prior to be eligible for TDI(temporary disability insurance, it's our disability system in RI and you can only get what you pay in as well). So that's out. Obviously there's no paid leave as a waitress. I will still get child support from the husband and from the oldest daughter's father. But those two together are barely enough for rent and gas for the car. I still have phone, car payment, heat, electric, etc. I have medicaid, wic, and food stamps currently. I have a little money saved up right now but that will be enough to keep me out 6 weeks with the child support I will get. I can also file my taxes to get some money to stay out of work. But here's the thing: my husband(soon to be ex) is my daycare right now and I work nights and weekends so it's opposite his schedule AND I can work only the busiest nights and days so that I spend as little time away from the kids as possible(works out to 20-25hours a week and 4 days). But he is deploying voluntarily with the air guard to Kuwait for 6 months. We've known about it for a while now. But there goes my daycare and RI has no second shift daycares that I know of. And my in-laws won't watch all the kids 4 days a week for me. So that leaves me with no one to watch my girls. I think I have to get a full-time day job and put them all in daycare. But I make right around $15-20 an hour as a waitress and the best job I can find right now is full-time $12 an hour PLUS the added cost of daycare. It will be $550 a WEEK for daycare for the kids and they'd be in at least 2 different daycares. And I can't get federal aid until September for going back to school because they don't do that during summer session. So what do I do????? We have a program here that will put me back in school in the fall and give me free child care and PAY for my schooling but I'd give up my child support and have to live off of $400 a month which isn't HALF my rent. So that's impossible and not the right time either. I'm at a loss. I'm panicked. And I've been having a TON of contractions and I've lost my plug and things generally look like I"m expecting Big Bird a lot sooner than previously thought(I'm 33.4weeks now). So now I'm all panicked about how we'll get by. I have SO many bills and SO little income right now but with child support I may make too much for much assistance. I don't know what to do. Any ideas? Anything you guys can think of would be helpful!
I was also thinking about maybe you doing child care? I mean, I myself would love to have someone like minded to watch my kids, instead of a day care situation where you never really know how much attention they will get, etc. And people will pay well to have a responsible, dependable person watch their kids. I was a Nanny and I did really well for only having one child to take care of. Look in to that, it might work for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2Sweeties1Angel View Post
We received a shut-off notice for our electric today If we don't pay them $365 by the 10th, they're shutting our electric off. Great. I called and told them I have 3 small children and no way to pay that much, but they don't care. They won't give me a payment plan or anything. I told them that it's against state law to shut off our power since we have small children and the temps are regularly dropping below 32 degrees. Their reply? "We don't care. We just shut off power in 40 homes right before Christmas. The electric company doesn't have to follow state law." They were freaking BRAGGING about it! I'm turning them in to the attorney general. Um, hello? Nobody is above state law, jackass.

My mom is going to pay the bill but I'm turning them in anyway. I don't like it when people f$^# with me.
Wow, that is crazy!! How rude of them! I agree, turn them in! I can understand that they want to be paid, however, to openly brag about all of the people with children who they left in the cold like that, that is so deplorable :

Quote:
Originally Posted by chely7425 View Post
I can't believe the electric company doesn't think that the law applies to them... good for you for turning them in!!!

Well, we have found a place to move to... it will be hard but for our sanity we need our own place. Also, the landlords are taking money of the rent every month in exchange for DF and our boss doing work on the property. Plus, my office will be in the house and the work truck will be parked there so we won't have much gas usage at all. I am also looking for a child or 2 to watch for some extra money. I have sooooo much stuff to do this week... classes started today, I need to find out if the house has DSL or cable, utilities need to be switched, I have a bunch of work stuff to do and I need to sort through all our crap and start packing and getting rid of stuff. Ack!!
That is great! Good luck on the move!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Belleweather View Post
I'm just going to post gratefuls, since we're doing okay at the moment. It's second-to-second as far as finances, but I'm going to try to stay in "El Mundo Bueno" as long as I can.

1. Rhys and I are doing GREAT as far as postpartum stuff. When he was checked for weight on day 3, he'd lost so little that he wasn't even on the chart... my bottom feels amazing thanks to the midwives choice to use super glue and not stitches on my minor tear... breastfeeding is going well, and he has a solid latch, so my boobs are okay... my gallbladder hasn't regenerated and no other organs have gone bad so far! Seriously, I didn't realize how absolutely TERRIBLE postpartum with Elliot was until I had a 'normal' recovery. I am absolutely beyond grateful for this.

2. I'm fitting into my prepartum pants! AND a friend gave me a couple of nursing bras. They look a lot more like something you'd use to airlift an elephant, but they fit and are cotton and comfy. I was worried about not having anything to wear after the birth, but I think (with judicious use of Christmas Money and the Goodwill) I'll be okay!

3. Our postpartum help, despite getting on my last nerve at least a couple of times a day, has been great. I'm getting reasonable amounts of sleep, and we're eating SO WELL. It's really nice to have friends who are okay with staying in and putzing on the internet and cooking rather than insisting on going out all the time... especially since taking the two boys to the grocery store for milk, eggs, and spaghetti nearly exhausted me. And we've still got to make it to WIC and the Pediatrician this week.
I am so glad you have help and that you are recovering well

Quote:
Originally Posted by kittywitty View Post
Been busy, but joining back in. It's been awhile! Our cc limit went way up, so we have been living off of that for awhile. I am really too ashamed to say that we went over our limit even though I thought we were still under, and now owe all the money from our new bed which we desperately needed this month and I just had a baby!

We are going to have to go try and get a loan to pay the cc bill. Thankfully tax returns aren't too far off and dh should be getting his overtime pay for last semester in February, so we can pay some of that bill off. This is so depressing right now. We took most of the stuff we got for Xmas back to buy groceries for the next month, and got some money from family that we need to use to renew our car registration that is expired, but it's that or groceries...

I hate it how all this debt seems to seep out at the holiday seasons. And dd's bday is next week. I only got her one book and she was already depressed that Santa didn't bring her as much as the other kids (she got a keyboard we saved for for her free piano lessons from dh's work). She is such a big reader and really wanted more new books or a toy. And ds's bday is in less than a month and I have nothing for him.

And with my unexpected hospital visit for this birth, that is a $1200-2000 deductible just for the stay, I don't know about the ER visit and ambulance. And my chiropractor bill is being rejected by our new insurance, so that is coming. *sigh*

Sorry, just had to vent.

I do have a plan, though. Hopefully we can get most of the credit card paid off with tax returns, and his overtime hopefully will cover car registration (he is a teacher, so it will only be a couple hundred $ at most for the overtime). Then he is going to teach a few classes this summer, and we will use that to pay off the medical bills at least in part, cancel the credit card, and hopefully have a little bit of money to use to move and buy a house this August. We got approved for a state loan for a house last year, hopefully we can do the same this year and get another 100% loan with 0 down. That way we can start growing some of our food.
It is nice to see you here, good luck paying your debt down, I am working on that now too

Okay, so someone tell me that it is okay that my washing machine is not spinning. I think something might have gotten stuck under the aggitator, because the motor is running, it is just not spinning. I am praying that DH can fix it tonight when he gets home. It is only a couple of years old, a wedding gift from my parents. I don't know why, but I am in a panic. I guess because I am really uncomfortable not being able to clean my laundry should I have to, yeah, I am weird. But I am sure it is okay. I am telling myself that so I wont have a panic attack.
post #156 of 689
Forgot my thankfuls

1. I am thankful that I got on the scale this morning and I have lost another 11 lbs this month to add to last month... that makes 25 lbs total lost
2.. I am thankful that my Uncle gave me two brand new tires so I saved a lot of money, and that my new tires are so awesome that I had no trouble at all getting home in the snow today
3. I am thankful that I did well on my first evaluation from work that I got yesterday. I am thankful that my boss asked me if I wanted to keep working there and if I was happy, and I said yes
4. I am thankful that my washer picked today not to work since I only had one load to do and not like, 5
5. I am thankful to have so much yarn that I can just crochet to my heart's content on baby blankets for Mamas
post #157 of 689
Hi everyone ,

Welcome to all the new mama's.

I haven't had much time to respond to posts because my kidlets have been sick for five days with the stomach flu! DD is just back to school today so I have a few minutes. I guess what's on my mind most is my relationship with my dh, things improved slightly over Christmas but have hit a rough spot again and I'm finding it so hard to stay positive and not engage in the negative stuff. Oh well. I am so proud of myself though, while the kids were sick I completely scrubbed down our bedroom and bathroom with a bleach solution because we have a real mold problem, then I covered the windows with the plastic. It was exhausting on top of all the extra laundry etc but I was so motivated to get it done. Now I want to do the same for the living room and kitchen, and when I'm done with the surfaces I'm planning to take every dish and toy that I can to run them through the sanitiser downstairs! I'm so done with my family being sick, it has been one thing or another since mid September! Oh and with all the extra sickness I wasn't able to have my childcare kids over so I've got no money for groceries.

However things I am grateful for:-

The drier was fixed yesterday, so I can catch up with all the laundry.

I got to do a full day of prenatals at my apprenticeship on Tuesday.

I'm getting a free box of CSA fruit on Friday.

I guess that's it for now, gonna go eat breakfast and get dressed before dh and ds2 come back from the school run.
post #158 of 689
where are all the mamas?

I was so sad this morning when I logged on...with my and there was no MDC

but its back

i finally wrote out thank you notes for christmas....and beyond. had a nice crying jag....and logged back on to find the boards back up. Now i know why i haven't got them done before now

justmama....how are you this morning?

and thystle....i hope you are going away to do something fun? I am sitting here eating a big warm bowl of the "mighty tasty cereal" you sent me....with raisins and brown sugar:. It seems like everyday I am grateful for who you are.

its so cold here today I've decided to not even bother going outside...its around 5*...with wind:....the pooches can utilize the back yard.

but, there's plenty to do right here. i really want to go through and declutter before the semester starts. its not a very study-friendly environment. and i want to price a few things..antiques...and put them on cl. there is way too much furniture in our little apartment....and weed through books...I always say I don't buy books, but i always end up with huge amounts of them. we just don't have room for bookshelves, and I love the library. and i want to get rid of all these cd's. they are all on itunes....why are they still just sitting here? and whats up with all the freakin' paper?

and laundry.........

okay, i'm insprired! I'll check in later

but my gratefuls are
1. mdc mamas....the warmth here is beautiful
2. edie is back at school! i should have a celebratory drink. we've done well, but OMG give me breathing room!
3. a few dollars to get a few things done....bills paid, catfood, dogfood, a few minutes in a sundrenched tanning booth
post #159 of 689
Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_02_0.jpg
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_02_1.jpg



pics of the newborn longies I finished for Big Bird the other day. Just a drawstring left now.
Beautiful!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Satori View Post
:hop mad

So I called the welfare office this morning to find out where my cash aid was becasue it wasn't on my card. I learned 2 things...


Here they put food stamps on a card but the cash is mail to you in a check WTH?!

then I learned something even better...

my case is still pending!!!!!! Its been 7 weeks and its still friggin pending! So since its pending there is no check. So not only am I going to get stuck paying a $45 late fee on the rent which I CAN NOT afford, I'm already selling everything I can to cover the other bills becasue the cash aid doesn't even cover all the rent but now I have no rent money coming AND no money for gas for our Dr appt and the car is on empty

:
I hope everything gets straightened out soon, and so glad they at least got your benefits to you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by amydidit View Post
Just popping in... I haven't been able to keep up with this thread, wow, it moves fast! I've been dealing with a sick DH and DD2. We think they have whooping cough. We were at my SIL for Christmas and 2 of their DC had tested positive for it. Of course they didn't tell us that until AFTER DH and DD2 got sick. ~grumbles~

Anyway... time for work. I'll try and pop in later.
Hope everyone is feeling better soon!

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~*Jaime View Post
I totally have this bad habit of hitting submit before I am actually done typing :

So it is snowing in West Virginia today. This morning the roads were totally nasty, as per my DH, but now they look much better. I should not have any problem getting to work this evening.

As for me I am sort of in a depressed/cranky thing. I am blaming it on my body trying to figure itself out after stopping hormonal birth control. I did have a period, finally, but it was quick. Now I am waiting for another one. I try to chart my temperatures but I have fevors so often from these wonky ear infections that I could never get anything accurate. Maybe I will try again anyway.

We are going back and forth on this whole baby issue. On one hand I would love to have a baby as soon as my body gets back in to a normal rhythem and I start ovulating, etc. On the other hand, I know that because I am overweight that I will be considered high risk and will end up not coming anywhere close to the pregnancy and birth that I would like to have. I just feel that hospital births are so confining. And the high risk birthing unit in our area is very much about the whole birth on your back nonsense. Not that birthing on your back is bad, I am sure it works for a lot of people but what if I don't want to be flat on my back? What if another position works better. Plus a client at my shelter gave birth there and I was shocked *okay, appalled* at how many people were prodding the baby and messing with the baby, and just in general bothering the baby. I have nothing against medical students, when I was getting my teaching degree people let me practice teaching their kids, so I feel like I do not have the right to complain about a student learning how to work in other fields. But there was just so many of them. And they posted pictures of the baby on the internet even after the Mom told them 4 times not to because she was in an abusive situation and needed to keep all news of the baby private for safety reasons. Gaah! And those creepy hospital blankets they wrap the babies in. I really don't want my baby in one of those. I make baby blankets, and I know the love I put in to every single row. Even if I don't know a baby personally, the love is still there. I just can't handle a mass produced blanket being put on my child.

Okay, my husband thinks I am a bit irrational on the issue, and maybe I am. But we have very clear ideas of what we want and I don't think a birth in a hospital with 50 people around and my Mom and MIL telling me what I should do is what I really want.

My Mom is on board with a homebirth, my MIL is dead set against it. The only thing we have going for us is that my husband's family does not circumsize babies and my family has no boys, so at least we wont have to defend our no circumsicion stance to our immediate familes Everything else though, I am sure will be an issue. Like, we don't even plan on buying a crib right away, because we would like to explore co sleeping. We also want to live simply and don't want our child to be spoiled like I was.

I don't know, I suppose none of this matters because I would like to pay off the debt we have first, so that I can SAH permanatly. But lately DH has been hinting that he wants to try, and we have a get out of debt plan in place, so it looks like the time might be approaching faster than I realized and now I am freaking out :

Sorry to ramble.
I've had three wonderful homebirths at right around 300 pounds. It can be done, but I guarentee the pregnancy experience has got to be better at a lighter weight/more fit condition. It wasn't horrible, but emotionally it is hard when people just assume you are really fat and not that you are pregnant.
post #160 of 689
I'll be back to update and do my thankfuls soon.
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