Queer TTC January 2008! - Page 8

[frog]

Nothing yet, but I suspect today will be the day for our DIY insem and tomorrow will be the IUI.

I'm taking it as a good sign that I got this email this morning from my mom's first cousin--he and I sort of rediscovered each other about 10 years ago at a family reunion, where we pegged one another as gay as the day is long. He and his partner were married in honor of their 25th anniversary (I was lucky enough to be able to attend their wedding) and about three years ago finally became parents. This is an (slightly edited) excerpt of the email that greeted me this morning:

After arriving back from our beach house over the Thanksgiving holidays we had a couple of weeks to prepare for R's ordination. We were touched by many people from our past that were making an effort to come to R's ordination to the priesthood. People R worked with at home care over 20 years ago, friends from DC, friends from various times in seminary and of course family were planned on gathering starting Thursday night, December 13.

On the preceding Tuesday, December 11, our social worker came by to announce that the state had awarded us premature newborn twins...if we wanted them. They had tried calling us all day, but the power was out at the house so they couldn't get us! We literally had 18 hours to plan for the arrival of two newborns. Benjamin would need to be picked up the next day at noon. Our unbelievable neighbors sprung into action and went to the store to buy what we needed in the immediate future.

We arrived at the hospital ICU at 1 pm on Wednesday, December 13, and there they were. Their nurse was fantastic in helping us get to know the twins quickly. The whole staff was wonderful while we were there. So Benjamin came home on Wednesday. Anna was ready to come home the next day but we persuaded the hospital to let us bring her home on Friday -- and they agreed.

Thursday, December 13 arrived and with it a snow storm. R's parents made it just in time before the snow really came down. Due to the weather, sadly about 20 out-of-state guests couldn't be with us.

Friday, December 14 arrived and due to picking up Anna from the hospital, R missed his ordination rehearsal. He, his mother, and sister went to pick her up while A stayed at home with Joshua (4), Benjamin, and our stellar au pair, K. They arrived home with Anna just two hours before about 30 people were coming to the house for dinner. All came off without a hitch!

On Saturday, December 15 the ordination went off beautifully . Saturday night another storm comes and R couldn't get to Trinity Church to preside at his first mass. So the first mass took place in our home with family, neighbors and out-of-state friends who were staying nearby and could walk to the house. Gathered in the living room with our children Joshua, Anna and Benjamin, R's family members, long-time friends from across the decades and country, and our beloved neighbors, we celebrated a Eucharist of thanksgiving, reflecting on the advent of Christ in our lives and the surprise that God brings to us.

Needless to say, I'm sitting here in my office, crying my little eyes out.

[smartycat]

aw Frog, that is a beautiful story.

Hopefully it is a good sign of things to come for you.

[lemurmommies]

Wow, that IS a beautiful story. I love hearing all of the beautiful ways that queer individuals come to be parents, and the lengths that people will go to to create their own families.

[frog]

Dearest egglet,

Any time now, okay?

love,

frog and turtle

[Scalpel]

fingers crossed for you!!

[megincl]

Originally Posted by frog

Dearest egglet,

Any time now, okay?

love,

frog and turtle

Thinking lovely thoughts for the egglet over here......

megin

[travelgirlz]

Good Luck Frog!!

That is an amazing story, I needed a little queer cheer today!

Can I please be moved to waiting to O
We had another BFN today. This was our third one and I have to say that the emotional side of things is getting really tough. My partner never misses an apointment and we are tighter than ever, but we are both just really sad and wondering if it will ever happen..... But we will start this whole process again next week with AF.

[pranava]

Originally Posted by frog

Dearest egglet,

Cute, Frog!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I'll call mine egglets as well from now on - if you don't mind.


Travelgirz - so sorry for the BFN. It's very, very hard.

[frog]

Originally Posted by pranava

Cute, Frog!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I'll call mine egglets as well from now on - if you don't mind.

Of course I don't mind! I'd be honored.

[pranava]

What's your opinion?

Do most women have pregnancy symptoms before they get a BFP or do most experience no symptoms?


I hear all these stories about women having every symptom in the book starting at 5 dpo. I was just wondering if this is common or rare.

[frog]

Originally Posted by pranava

Do most women have pregnancy symptoms before they get a BFP or do most experience no symptoms?

I think it's a total crap shoot. I suspect that those of us trying notice more symptoms, in part because we're looking for them. My dad's cousin, though, is one of those women who didn't know she was pregnant until she gave birth...

[JennM1021]

I agree Frog...when you're looking for those symptoms...they're much easier to notice. BUT...unfortunatley for me...I get a lot of the early symptoms you read so much about as part of my usual PMS! Yippe for me. :

[lemurmommies]

Originally Posted by pranava

Do most women have pregnancy symptoms before they get a BFP or do most experience no symptoms?


I hear all these stories about women having every symptom in the book starting at 5 dpo. I was just wondering if this is common or rare.

The only symptom I got before getting my BFP with DS was a crazy burning feeling in my breasts. I was seriously coming home from work and icing them they hurt so badly. To me, it was definitely NOT a run-of-the-mill pre-AF symptom, so I was pretty sure I was in fact pregnant.

[KnittingTigers]

Originally Posted by pranava

Do most women have pregnancy symptoms before they get a BFP or do most experience no symptoms?


I hear all these stories about women having every symptom in the book starting at 5 dpo. I was just wondering if this is common or rare.

Well, I have had symptoms before a BFP, but I've also had very similar symptoms before a BFN, so... This time (BFP that stuck), I felt fewer symptoms than I had in some BFN months (sore boobs, etc.), though I did have AF-like cramps from 6dpo onwards.

Anyway, I wouldn't sweat it either way. Not feeling pregnant is not necessarily an indication of not being pregnant. (Much as, sadly, feeling pregnant is not necessarily an indication of being pregnant...)

[travelgirlz]

This month with my bfn I totally had different symptoms than there other bfn months. Starting at about 5dpo and still, I am having lower back pain (i never have any sort of lower back pain with af). Also, my face is clear, which usually breaks out like crazy before my period. I also think that I am far more aware of differences month to month since we started this process.

My friend who just told me she got a bfp on new years had no signs what so ever and she didn't have any signs with her last one either, only her missed period. So I agree with the crap shoot idea!

[smartycat]

We are very excited. We went to see our midwife today (Stacia... Yeah Frog for mentioning her in the Xytex thread!) and we have the go ahead to try this month! We really have just begun and realize that there may be a moderate to long road ahead, but we are excited to begin the journey none-the-less.

Wish us lots of

Frog, how is the egglet coming along?

Travelgirlz, hang in there :

[snoopy13]

what a great story, frog! truly inspiring to egglets near and far, i'd think!

i'd love to see a poll or stats about conception "symptoms." i bet the fine folks at FF have the data! but haven't seen anything there. their study on the likelihood of false negatives in the days between conception and missed periods was way helpful for my piece of mind...

for me, the biggest most unmistakeable signal i got was not just breast enlargement but um nipple/areola swelling. although my teeny breast get slightly less teeny with ovulation and pre-menstrually, the nipple thing was distinct -- and temporary -- on the month i believe i conceived but did not implant, AND on the month i have both conceived and implanted.

also, burping! which happened not only on those 2 months but very distinctly when i got pregnant as a teenager...

JD

[mhiccup]

Great story, Frog! Perhaps DP's mom was right when she said that it'll happen when we least expect it (though I think we'll always have some it's going to happen).

As for symptoms, I have no comparisons to go on, but it turns out that this month's paucity of symptoms meant exactly what one would imagine. Please move me to waiting to O.

I really hate the idea of taking drugs to do this, but I think it's time to check in with the doctor. I'm making an appointment tomorrow. This is really getting ot be a drag.

[simcon]

Symptoms-wise, I had none to speak of with Maddie. I think I've told this story here before, but I actually fell back asleep in the 2 minutes after I peed (on 11 dpo), and only discovered the positive bfp upon re-awaking. oops.

For the wee one we miscarried at 12 weeks, I had some symptoms at 4-5 dpo, but then they receded and I didn't really have any more until 12-13 dpo, when I already had the bfp in hand.

Just in case my experiences give any hope

Of course I have crazy "symptoms" this month--sore boobs, etc--but we didn't inseminate...

[frog]

Originally Posted by smartycat

Frog, how is the egglet coming along?

As anticipated, the OPK was positive around dinner-time last night (I'd been testing mid-morning and after work) so we did our DIY insem around 6:45. I wore my fuzzy frog socks and a cowgirl shirt for good luck. After the insem, I was feeling snacky so turtle made me some popcorn. The expiration date on the bag? October 2008, which will be our due date if this cycle sticks.

:

(That's me shooting baby dust at myself.)