Unschooling Support Jan 08 - Page 9

[majikfaerie]

Hey mamas
the homeschoolers meeting was awesome
It was at a nice playground on the edge of a river in a beachside village about 25 minutes from our place (we live in a really remote area, so we have to go at least 15 minutes just to buy milk, so this is close).
There were loads of kids, probably about a dozen families; maybe 25 kids, in ages ranging from babies to 12 year-olds. Though the majority was definately in the 3-6 age range, which is good, since DD is 4.5yo.

There was a few people we know from before, but mostly new faces, and the best part; most of the families are more on the "unschooling" spectrum than "school-at-home"

there was quite a few people into aware parenting and NVC too. just one other family who are "whole life" radical unschoolers, like us, but so many that are into the natural learning part, and working on unrestricted living in other areas.

They're compiling a directory of all the members, and meeting every week, but with a bigger meeting on the last week of the month.

: yay!!!!!

and! I got a new MW client today; an ex gf of mine and she just moved into a new place down the road from us!

[KaraBoo]

that group sounds great! I'd love to luck into a situation like that! Well, at least I'll have Pia soon!

Moving plans are speeding up. We have lots of interest in our furniture and appliances. And books! LOL God, people practically fight over our book collection. I'm only bringing about 40 books for myself and DH has gotten his down to 32. We still haven't gone through DD's with her yet. She has a nearly ceiling-high bookshelf that's full. But if she wants to take them all, she can.

I have been feeling really ill in the past few days and I just started my period on top of that so I'm not a happy lady today. I woke up, took three ibuprofen and lounged with the cat while watching "Once." God, what a great movie! DD came upstairs and watched a bit with me. She likes music.

I hate taking ibuprofen but I only take it when I get my moontime. And boy, it helps!!!! I felt so good that I could come downstairs and put in laundry and sit at the computer desk without moaning. As I get older, my periods get heavier and heavier.

Anyway, the plan for today is this: read to dd, play some cards and/or boardgames with dd, try to go through the coat closet in the foyer if I'm up to it and make soup for dinner. DD will probably play her My Sims game at some point in the day (she's technically "won" the game but is still playing) and she has mentioned she'd like to help me with my town too.

I'd better go use my energy now before my pills wear off! Hope everyone has a great day

[pia]

Originally Posted by KaraBoo

Well, at least I'll have Pia soon!

...and I´ll have Kara! :

[Milakais]

UnschoolnMa - Eek! I'm glad you're okay!

majikfaerie - I'm glad the group meeting went well. It sounds like a great group and a lot of fun!

[ColwynsMommy]

I haven't posted on this thread yet, but I've slowly been working my way through all the responses. I just had to vent about an email I got from a homeschool group I belong to. I pay yearly dues for this group, and so far haven't found *anything* suitable for my kids. They have TWO preschool coordinators, but they only announce monthly meetings to fun places like fire stations, local TV stations, etc, a few days before they go, so we almost always already have plans.

So I emailed the coordinators and asked if maybe we could set up a playgroup, that I could even host at my house, that I'd really like for my boys to meet some other kids who don't go to school. I don't want anything academic or project-y, just playtime.

One of them wrote back saying that they do have bi-monthly playgroups, they just don't advertise them on the email list since they have limited space. They have an academic focus with planned activities, they meet fairly far away from me, and they only meet between 1-3pm. Now, not for nothing.. but don't most young kids nap between those times? Mine do. Everyone else I know IRL who has young kids has their kids nap between those times.

Even the activities w/o age restrictions that the group plans are between 1-3pm, so we really have no options. I can't believe I paid money for this. Argh.

[4evermom]

Originally Posted by ColwynsMommy

Even the activities w/o age restrictions that the group plans are between 1-3pm, so we really have no options. I can't believe I paid money for this. Argh.

Argh indeed! That sounds completely annoying.

We've had very little luck meeting others nearby. And I really get the feeling there are all sorts of cool people who keep to themselves and don't ever post on the yahoo lists so I'll never get to meet them. Ds doesn't enjoy classes so we don't run into people that way. In two years, we've made friends with two families. One is a school family so not available during the week and in the other the oldest kid is 3 years younger than ds. But we just spent a fabulous 2 hours at the playground with them.

Anyway, it occurs to me I've been just lurking on this thread for the past couple of months, lol. I'm still here with 6 yo ds. We went to a fun science center last week. Mostly I just try to find places to go and people to go with. He loves museums. He is still on the cusp of reading. We tried bowling a couple times with a local group. Ds' bowled in a rather free form way. I over heard other moms telling their kids to "do it right." The highlight of bowling was the temporary tattoos in the vending machine, lol.

[MarineWife]

Hey y'all. Well, I had so much to say I was going to warn you all ahead of time that this post would be long but now that I have time to sit down and type I've forgotten almost all of it.

Anyway, I do have a pic of ds2 in the rocketship we made today.

Rocketship

[UnschoolnMa]

MarineWife that rocketship is the greatest, and it has an adorable pilot!

Majik, I am so pleased to hear the group went swimmingly! We've attended a group a few times, and the people were really nice and welcoming. It turns out we just weren't in that place though. We might be later... who knows.

My Dad sent me a picture of the kids today from about 5 years ago. It was such a trip to see how little they were! It brought back a lot of memories of the trip we were on then, where we lived at the time, how long Dd's hair was then (and that it will "take forever to get that long again...." LOL), and so on. What a trip down memory lane that was.

[ZanZansMommy]

Originally Posted by ColwynsMommy

I don't want anything academic or project-y, just playtime.

Now, not for nothing.. but don't most young kids nap between those times? Mine do. Everyone else I know IRL who has young kids has their kids nap between those times.

That's such a bummer Mama. My DS2 naps during that time as well so it's tough to get my 4 yo to afternoon get togethers.

My biggest issue is all the academic projects the mamas want to do (for the 4yr olds). My DD just wants to play with the other kids not go thru some structured sit down lesson about the planets. Just today it got super frustrating b/c DD wanted to use one of the styrofoam balls as the planet Jupiter. Her little friend wanted to do the same but another Mama came over & said, "You can't use that one for Jupiter. Jupiter is the biggest planet & that ball isn't big enough. It has to be Saturn." I quickly jumped in & said, " I see you two even drew the red spot for Jupiter. That's great." then I explained to the Mom that I didn't see any reason why it couldn't be Jupiter. She wasn't too happy with me b/c I'm sure in her mind it HAD to be Saturn.

I'm finding it hard to reconcile my unschooling beliefs with very structured at home friends. We like them so much but there always comes this point where we cross this invisible line of akwardness b/c the kids aren't supposed to be doing one thing but they're supposed to be doing another. : I'm struggling with this a lot.

[ZanZansMommy]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

Hey y'all. Well, I had so much to say I was going to warn you all ahead of time that this post would be long but now that I have time to sit down and type I've forgotten almost all of it.

Anyway, I do have a pic of ds2 in the rocketship we made today.

Rocketship

He looks so proud of it.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by UnschoolnMa

MarineWife that rocketship is the greatest, and it has an adorable pilot!

Thanks. I think so, too, but I may be a little biased. I'm learning that I have some engineering skills myself. Very fun!

In the past couple of days I've made some turkey stock from left over Thanksgiving turkey that I froze. I think things like that only keep for about 3months in the freezer so I figured I'd better use it. It smells wonderful but I have no idea what to do with it. Everyone tells me to make soup but I honestly don't know how to do that. I'm also not a big fan of soup. That's something my kids will get to watch me learn and even get to try and critque my end result. hehe We made gingerbread cookies per ds2's request. I couldn't find my rolling pin because he's forever taking it to play with so I mashed it with my hands and he cut it with cookie cutters. Once they were cooked he said, "Ew! I don't like these." It's a good thing I love them, although they aren't as good as the one's ds1 makes. He makes the best ever! Then I couldn't use the kitchen for a day and a half because it takes at least that long for me to clean up from such endeavors.

DS3 is teething again and he doesn't want to sleep. He's working on his 4th tooth since Christmas, which ds2 told me the other day. "It's his 4th." I think, at least, that once this one is in that will be it for a while. He wants to try to eat everything in sight and it's hard for me to keep up with him.

I haven't made it back to the gym since Monday. DS2 and I did some yoga yesterday with the Namaste yoga show on FitTV while ds3 was napping. I should say I did yoga and ds2 ran circles around me. He said all his energy makes him run. That didn't help much with the meditation part of the yoga. I much prefer to work out at home, too, UnschoolnMa, but I never get enough interrupted time to do much of anything. I'm not sure how I feel about leaving the boys in the kid's room at the gym. Like I said before, the people there are very nice and attentive but I'm not really comfortable with someone else comforting my baby that much. I really think it should be mom or dad as much as possible. Not to mention that when he stopped crying as soon as I took him they said he was crying fake tears just for me. grrrrrrrr

Another concern of mine is that so many of the other older kids that ds2 would play with just don't seem very nice. For example, there was another 4yo boy there when we went. DS2 told this other boy that he was 4, too. The other boy apparently insisted so much that my ds was not 4 that my ds got upset. I just really don't understand why that would even need to be an argument. To me it seems like an example of how children live what they learn by being treated like the things they say aren't true or valid or whatever. Of course, I don't really know exactly what happened, only what my ds told me after the fact. This sort of thing happens a lot, though, so that I avoid most group things for ds2. Then I wonder if I'm being overprotective. I hope that's not too OT.

That's about half of all the stuff I was thinking of posting. I'll stop now since that's so long.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by ZanZansMommy

My biggest issue is all the academic projects the mamas want to do (for the 4yr olds). My DD just wants to play with the other kids not go thru some structured sit down lesson about the planets. Just today it got super frustrating b/c DD wanted to use one of the styrofoam balls as the planet Jupiter. Her little friend wanted to do the same but another Mama came over & said, "You can't use that one for Jupiter. Jupiter is the biggest planet & that ball isn't big enough. It has to be Saturn." I quickly jumped in & said, " I see you two even drew the red spot for Jupiter. That's great." then I explained to the Mom that I didn't see any reason why it couldn't be Jupiter. She wasn't too happy with me b/c I'm sure in her mind it HAD to be Saturn.

I'm finding it hard to reconcile my unschooling beliefs with very structured at home friends. We like them so much but there always comes this point where we cross this invisible line of akwardness b/c the kids aren't supposed to be doing one thing but they're supposed to be doing another. : I'm struggling with this a lot.

I was going to ask if this was an unschooling group specifically or just a homeschooling group. I've run into this same problem with other homeschooling families I know. It's been a dilemma for me because I thought I would have a lot in common with them since they are AP and homeschooling and GD. It turns out, though, that we have very different opinions of what all of that means with me being the odd man out most of the time. One thing, I think, is that I am way more relaxed then they are about everything because I have a teenager. I've btdt with all the control stuff (no matter how minor) and have learned from experience that it's not worth it. I was surprised when I brought up unschooling and I got a very negative response. "No. I must teach my kids. They won't learn unless I show them what, when, where, how and why."

[4evermom]

Originally Posted by MarineWife

It's been a dilemma for me because I thought I would have a lot in common with them since they are AP and homeschooling and GD. It turns out, though, that we have very different opinions of what all of that means with me being the odd man out most of the time.

Nodding along, here. I have trouble with people that I ought to get along with based on common values, too. For instance, the nutrition conscious. Of course, I'd like ds to eat healthfully but I'm not going to get into a power struggle about it. It's problematic going to a playgroup because ds has food aversions and the foods he will eat when out and about are foods the other mothers don't want their kids having. I always pick the least offensive to them and palatable to ds option. Then everyone else's kids devour what I brought instead of the carrot sticks their moms brought while ds was too distracted to eat anything at all, lol.

[roomformore]

Originally Posted by pia

Today I am going to get a book I ordered: Stiff, The secret life of Cadavers.
+ order a Naomi Aldort book.

Stiff is an interesting read. Enjoy!

Originally Posted by ZanZansMommy

I'm finding it hard to reconcile my unschooling beliefs with very structured at home friends. We like them so much but there always comes this point where we cross this invisible line of akwardness b/c the kids aren't supposed to be doing one thing but they're supposed to be doing another. : I'm struggling with this a lot.

We struggle with this as well. We enjoy group outings, but don't want anything really academic. I've volunteered myself to organize a few outings, but am being very upfront that I will not be teaching anything. I never understood why anyone would want ruin a fun trip with lectures and worksheets.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by 4evermom

Nodding along, here. I have trouble with people that I ought to get along with based on common values, too. For instance, the nutrition conscious. Of course, I'd like ds to eat healthfully but I'm not going to get into a power struggle about it. It's problematic going to a playgroup because ds has food aversions and the foods he will eat when out and about are foods the other mothers don't want their kids having. I always pick the least offensive to them and palatable to ds option. Then everyone else's kids devour what I brought instead of the carrot sticks their moms brought while ds was too distracted to eat anything at all, lol.

Yes, yes! ITA! Would I like that ds eat only whole, natural, organic foods? Absolutely. Do I think it's worth getting into a huge and ongoing power struggle over when I know that sooner or later he's going to see it all and want it all? No. Using myself as an example. I wasn't really restricted in what I ate as a child. Now that I'm an adult this is one of my major interests. I want to eat healthy and I want my family to eat healthy. What I was allowed to do as a child was think.

[4evermom]

I find myself wanting to hang out with the moms whose kids are drinking Kool Aid, who get pitied by the other crowd for their lack of nutritional consciousness.

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by 4evermom

I find myself wanting to hang out with the moms whose kids are drinking Kool Aid, who get pitied by the other crowd for their lack of nutritional consciousness.

If only they didn't threaten and scream and spank, I'd be all over it.

[MarineWife]

I have to share this, too. DS getting into my makeup.

Make 'em up

He wears more than I do.

[majikfaerie]

marinewife, your ds looks gorgeous!
I don't have any makeup for dd to get into, and it really annoys her.

Actually, I'm really stuck on the make-up thing. of course, my unschooling heart doesn't mind if DD wants to play with make-up, but make-up is too often soooooooo toxic. I'd buy the "natural organic" ones, which I imagine have better ingredients (like dr hauschka or my essence) but they are so freakin expensive! like $30 for a lipstick. which is, imo, just too much to pay for my kid's dress-ups. So I would buy her the really cheap stuff, but then I read the ingredients and turn green.
any ideas??

[wonderwahine]

what about making some at home? mix a little food color powder with vaseline