What the heck did she do to me?

[Robinna]

Something from my last birth is really bothering me (OK, a LOT about my last birth really bothers me) and I thought you mamas might be able to offer some insight.

It was my 2nd birth and I laboured to pushing stage within about 75 minutes of identifiable labour, about 10 hours after SROM. Because we were expecting to go to c/s (don't get me started... link in my signature if you're curious) I let them know when I was feeling a lot of pressure. When the OB checked me, she did *something* that just about sent me through the roof - I've never experienced shooting pain like that from a VE, it was almost like she *tweaked* my cervix, if that makes any sense. I, of course, said *what the *&^% was that?!?" and she muttered something I didn't hear... and I said, where are we at? and she said, 9cm. Then she stared at me for a short time, and then all h*&^ broke loose as they panicked to get the OR ready. I was panting off pushes as they took me in.

I'm wondering if she hurt me on purpose. I realize that seems quite barbaric, I actually ahve a lot of respect for this OB she just didn't happen to be qualified to catch a breech due to lack of experience. What I want to know is what she DID that caused that pain.

The circumstances -
- she knew I wanted a vag delivery and that the c/s was "forced" by lack of experienced caregiver - and that I was not "at peace" with the idea in any way shape or form. Her partner was supposed to catch, except it wasn't his oncall day, and he wasn't coming in for me. I had had an arguement with her earlier in the day where i made it clear I would not be having a c/s before I was in active labour, but eventually, because there appeared to be no other options, gave verbal agreement that I wouldn't force her to catch.
- I'm a hypnomama and labour very calmly and quietly. she probably had NO idea that I was that advanced in labour, especially since she had never met me before that day, and we had had a telephone conversation about an hour earlier where I told her I was starting to get contractions and was going to head back to the hospital.

SO, I think she may have thought that I did it "on purpose" and delayed letting them know how advanced I was in order to maybe avoid the surgery. She may also have wondered if I have some freaky pain threshold since I was nearly ready to push and still completely calm - just saying "excuse me a moment" and absenting myself during contrax.

Her motivations, of course, I can only speculate about. But any idea what she might have done that would have hurt so much?

xo Robin

[mommyshine]

Wow

How awful for you. Could she have stripped your membrane? At the last apt I had before my dd was born the Dr did something to me that hurt a lot - my water broke that night. I always suspected that he stripped my membranes.

[hippiemom]

I am sorry for your experience... it was poorly managed to say the least. Barbaric yes, that you have to have your baby with a practitioner you had not previously met (if only briefly), and given your circumstances on top of all that...

Did she perhaps push the baby back up a bit if you were that close to pushing stage? This happened to a friend of mine who had a prolonged posterior labor. The baby came down to a certain point and got "stuck" so the OB decided to do a c/s. Before that however, she reached in and pushed the baby back further up into the birth canal... my friend described this much as you do here, VERY painful and sharp. The baby had a large purple-black spot on her head for a week after coming home.
You probably know this, but you have every right to a full explaination as to what happened, and to see the doc's report/your chart. Get answers if you seek them.

[blue_bug]

how awful, i'm sorry you had to go through that!!!

[mwherbs]

I imagine she did a rough exam- trying to really reach in and feel what the presenting part was and if what she was feeling was a little cervix left or if what she was feeling was a very effaced cervix that isn't dilated much- sometimes it is hard to tell the difference-- and if you didn't look like you were that far in labor then she probably really though you were barely dilated-- I also think that if you suspect some deliberate roughness- it is very possible, people can act out no matter what their job is--

[nashvillemidwife]

mwherbs, that was my thought; she was probably "rough" in trying to be more thorough to identify the presenting part, especially since she found you to be so close to delivery.

[Jane]

I wonder if she was manually dilating you some - or pushing a lip back- that often is excrutiatingly painful, but completes the dilation and allows the woman to start pushing - or go with the pushing she already was doing without swelling the cervix.

Sometimes even a plain, ordinary vaginal exams can be really painful, so that's a possibility.

[mwherbs]

Originally Posted by Apricot

I wonder if she was manually dilating you some - or pushing a lip back- that often is excrutiatingly painful, but completes the dilation and allows the woman to start pushing - or go with the pushing she already was doing without swelling the cervix.

Sometimes even a plain, ordinary vaginal exams can be really painful, so that's a possibility.

well the c-section was for breech- and the decision to do a c-section was before hand- so that is why I didn't think it was manual dilation

[Robinna]

Originally Posted by mwherbs

well the c-section was for breech- and the decision to do a c-section was before hand- so that is why I didn't think it was manual dilation

Yes, for this reason I doubt she was doing anything that might possibly have sped up progression considering she had no interest whatsoever in catching my daughter.

Yeah maybe she was checking presenting part to be sure dd was still breech. I have her email address I should just send her a note and ask... she's a good doctor, I'm just the first person who ever shook her paradigm. I've been sending her info on breech activism ever since. She'd probably answer the question if she even remembers - it was 20 months ago so she might not. And I doubt that she actually wants to talk to me, since I make her think.

[hippiemom]

Ha ha well said... keep sending her info, she sounds like she needs her horizons expanded. She may not personally remember, but your medical report will. You don't have to talk to her, you can simply request a copy of your chart.

Good for you mama, practitioners need to be better informed about breech and helping those babies come naturally as well, as they deserve.

[mom2tillie]

In my experience the medical report is not always entirely thorough or accurate as to what happened or what "they" tell you has happened, etc. if you get my drift. I wouldn't be at all surprised if there was no mention whatsoever of the VE and especially no mention of any extracurricular procedure that took place during it.

I am sorry that you went through such an awful experience, and it sounds to me like she probably pushed the baby back up. It is horrifying to think that is accepted in the medical environment or anywhere else for that matter.

I am facing a breech birth in February unless this baby turns and I still haven't decided if I want to roll the dice with my vbac vag breech friendly doc (or his questionable partners) or go the DIY route, my midwife isn't hip on breech births and would want me to transfer.

[nashvillemidwife]

Originally Posted by mom2tillie

it sounds to me like she probably pushed the baby back up

Why do you say that? Just curious.

[mom2tillie]

I have heard of OBs doing this before in situations such as this and it has been described as very painful as well, it happened to my aunt. Breeches seem to run in my family, unfortunately I can't seem to find out how far back, I'd love to know of just one that WASN'T a c-section. It's really shaking my confidence right now.

Perhaps she didn't push the baby back up, the only one that knows for sure is the doc herself but it sounds like a definate possibility given the fact that cesarean was predetermined at that point and the description.

[Robinna]

Originally Posted by mom2tillie

I am facing a breech birth in February unless this baby turns and I still haven't decided if I want to roll the dice with my vbac vag breech friendly doc (or his questionable partners) or go the DIY route, my midwife isn't hip on breech births and would want me to transfer.

From an activist POV I would love for you to use the Dr. or another caregiver - they need to know that we need them to have these skills, they need to see the demand. Too many of them are being complacent and pretending mamas always want c/s for breech. Burns my butt, lemme tell ya. But totally get the inclination to DIY... if I were to encounter a similar situation next time, with what I know now, I'd just go home. My labour was 75 freakin' minutes, if something was going to go wrong labour wouldn't have been so simple as it was (mammoth, but simple LOL... nothin' like 0-10 in 8 contrax to make a gal appreciate her hypnotraining!).