Teen pregnancy Child support question - Page 2

[hockeywoman]

Originally Posted by pigpokey

If you don't want to pay child support, I suggest you go buy a ring.

100% agree.

[mammal_mama]

First of all, congratulations on this new life!

Originally Posted by neo90

Although, my dad was rather worried that her parents would try to enforce child support on me whenever the baby is born.
( FYI: her parents are sneaky a**holes )

Doesn't your dad feel that you should support your child? Why? Doesn't your dad support you?

Can child support be enforced through her parents or would it have to be a decision made by my gf ( teen mother ).

In my state, support is automatically ordered by the court anytime the father listed on the birth certificate is not married to (and living with) the mother -- and if the father refuses to be on the birth certificate (I'm not saying you're likely to do that), a paternity test will be done.

If you're sure you're the father, I strongly recommend having your name on the birth certificate from the get-go. A son of a friend of mine declined, and waited for the paternity test. Now he's having trouble getting visitation rights, though he's having to pay child support.

I'm not trying to run from this issue, I just seen to many people get ruined over this. I rather pay money to help my child throughout the month, rather than a lump sum out of my check each week.

Get ruined for supporting their child? I don't see how taking parental responsibility can ruin you.

I do think you can get yourself into great difficulty, if you don't get something in writing right now, and prove that you're paying from the very beginning. I've heard of cases where there was no formal arrangement, because Dad was just giving Mom money as she needed it (or as he felt able) -- then later Dad got charged with back child-support for all the years when he was giving it to Mom informally, and he had no way to prove what he'd paid, so he was just screwed.

My own husband once paid his ex for a couple of months directly, because she said she really needed the money on time, and the court was always late getting it to her. She promised to reimburse him if he had to pay it again through the court -- then decided not to, ha ha.

Even though dh could prove that he'd paid his ex, the court said it didn't count as it didn't come through them. So he had to pay it all again. At least a couple of months is easier to make up than 5 or 10 years.

So, IMO, if you (or your dad) are worried about financial ruin, your best bet is to get court-ordered child support right away and keep all your receipts. Or even better, since things are so wonderful between the 2 of you, take pigpokey's advice and establish a home together. Overall, sharing a home is easier than supporting yourself in one home and your family in another.

[mammal_mama]

Is there actually a set amount for child-support in some states?

In my state, it's based on income. I think a teen (under 18) dad would be charged less than an older dad with more skills and experience, and a higher income.

Also, I think it'd be kind of unfair for a dad with, say, a 6-figure income to be charged the same amount as a teenager working for minimum wage.

[boobybunny]

:up

Originally Posted by pigpokey

If you don't want to pay child support, I suggest you go buy a ring.

This is the funniest and best thing I have seen on MDC lately. Cudos. Now will you kindly help me clean up my lap top?

[mammal_mama]

Originally Posted by boobybunny

Now will you kindly help me clean up my lap top?

Huh? I don't get the connection ... please enlighten me!

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by mammal_mama

Is there actually a set amount for child-support in some states?

I think people meant a set amount, as in what amount the court would set for the OP's particular situation, not a flat rate amount.

In my state, it's based on income. I think a teen (under 18) dad would be charged less than an older dad with more skills and experience, and a higher income.

Also, I think it'd be kind of unfair for a dad with, say, a 6-figure income to be charged the same amount as a teenager working for minimum wage.

hmm...I wonder what, if anything, the OP is making. I have an 18 year old nephew who is currently making more money than I ever did, and I worked for years.

[mammal_mama]

Originally Posted by Storm Bride

hmm...I wonder what, if anything, the OP is making. I have an 18 year old nephew who is currently making more money than I ever did, and I worked for years.

That's great (for him I mean). Since the OP (or his dad) seems worried about financial ruin, I thought maybe he hadn't landed the ideal career just yet ... but then again, income-level doesn't necessarily have anything to do with hesitancy about paying child-support: I've heard of very high-income dads balking about it and trying to get out of paying.

[boobybunny]

Originally Posted by mammal_mama

Huh? I don't get the connection ... please enlighten me!

Because the wonderful mango blueberry smoothie I was drinking ended up ALL over the computer.

[mammal_mama]

Originally Posted by boobybunny

Because the wonderful mango blueberry smoothie I was drinking ended up ALL over the computer.

Thanks! Now I get it!

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by mammal_mama

That's great (for him I mean). Since the OP (or his dad) seems worried about financial ruin, I thought maybe he hadn't landed the ideal career just yet ... but then again, income-level doesn't necessarily have anything to do with hesitancy about paying child-support: I've heard of very high-income dads balking about it and trying to get out of paying.

I hope it's great for my nephew...have a feeling it's going to be one of those "the money's great now, but isn't ever going to get any better" situations. You're right. I haven't noticed a huge correlation between ability to pay and willingness to pay when it comes to child support.

[hopefulfaith]

You have a lot of good, sage advice here that I won't retype...
but I just wanted to say WELCOME to MDC! I hope can come back here often to talk about parenting with us. There is a good "Dads" forum here, if you are looking for advice from other fathers, too.

Good luck!