First Birth as New Doula- Help!

[jeninejessica]

So I finally have a client lined up for my first birth ever. I am beyond excited. I feel like I've studied more than some Dr's. Even practiced massage and pain relief on the poor FH (ice cube cxn's anyone? lol) But I still am more nervous that I could even describe.

Anyone have tips for their first client? I think I would feel more knowledgable if she were a primip, but this will be her fourth baby, so obviously, she knows more than me/is more comfortable with it. Her DH is apparently great during labor, but they had an off-duty nurse at her last birth (18months prior), and really enjoyed the experience of having someone there just for them, so when she found out I was looking for births for certification she said she thought of me.

I've met her before, not in a doula context, and she seems like a lovely, relaxed, easygoing woman. I'm excited to be there to share this experience with her.

Our first 'meeting' will be next week likely, and I feel kind of like a fish out of water. Any stories, tips, websites you can direct me to? I suppose I'm really just in need of encouragement.

[shanetedissac]

I can remember when I went in for my first doula birth. I work at a hospital so there was no prenatal contact, I was meeting them for the first time at the hospital with her in labor. The trick is being calm and very open to your environment and what the client is saying. I had a rough start because my personal beliefs were spilling over and were noticed by the medical staff. I learned to be very aware of the client and what they needed at the moment.

It is excellent that you have the prenatal contact. Since my first I have had a dozen or so 'privates' that I had contact with before birth. It makes such a difference in the couples comfort level and also you have the time to inform then of anything they have questions on.

You mentioned that this couple his birthing #4 and they are looking for continuous support during the birth. There may not be too much prenatal required for this couple. Get to know how they see you at their birth. I like to have clients write a hypothetical birth story with the: who, what, where, why, and how's. I then read it over and then ask them to clerify any of the story so I can better understand their current perspective.

The first birth is amazing and so nerve racking! Let everyone else think you are an expert and you will feel the same.

Be well,

[1stTimeMummytoLore]

i would talk over their first three births and get a feel for what they liked and disliked out of those experiences. oh- and trust your instincts during the birth even if it's only your first one. at my first birth mom was having double peaking contractions but didn't want to leave for the hospital w/o brushing her teeth first. i should have been more firm with her in getting her out the door and in retrospect i knew it-- instead i got to help her birth her baby in her van in the parking lot of the hospital!!!! it was, however, an amazing experience and a crazy introduction to the life of a doula. you'll learn sooooo much from these first few births. enjoy them!

[izzysmama]

One of my first births was with a woman having her fourth child and she was a nurse!! I was pretty nervous but when she went into labor she was just as vulnerable as a first time mom yet totally able to give herself over to the power of her labor and the support her husband and I offered. It was a really great experience.
You'll do great! On a side note, the birth was this mom's first birth with a doula, and her first natural birth

[jeninejessica]

Thanks ladies. You've made some very good points. I told her that in our meeting I would very much like to go over her likes.dislikes of what happened before, and how she would like the birth to go, but I really do like the idea of having a client write out their "perfect birth" story. I think it would make it a little more personal than just a checklist birth plan.

You're right... labor is labor... whether it's a first birth or a fourth. The first three don't necessarily predict how the next will go.

Thanks again ladies. I feel so much better