Ok, you wise women are going to have to help me. I'm having this problem where each time I go out with this guy (we've gone out 3x over the last 4 weeks or so) I have a GREAT time. I definitely think that's mutual. He always calls or emails the next day to thank me and tell me he had a great time. But then he doesn't call for days or up to a week. For some reason this is troubling me. I don't know why, I just somehow expect him to call more/sooner. I just feel so connected to him after our dates (which have been including more extensive kissing each time
) and want to connect more. When he doesn't call I go through the whole he must just not be that into me thing. But then when we go out again, I really feel like he IS into me.
I know if I want to talk to him, some of you might say that I should just pick up the phone and call him, right? I'm not there. I tortured myself over this after the last date and came to the realization that I need to feel more sure of him before being the initiator. I am very receptive and always return calls/emails right away. This is just where my comfort level is right now.
So I'm not really debating whether to call him. I guess I'm just trying to figure out if my expectations are unrealistic, if he really isn't as into me, or what's going on. Do I need to just relax and go with the flow?
I don't know if he's seeing other people. There's no reason he shouldn't be... we've only gone out 3 times... there's nothing relationship-like about this (or I think I would feel comfortable calling him). It's funny, I say I'm ok with casual dating as I get to know someone and that I want to move slow. Yet, by all appearances that is what is happening and I somehow seem to be uncomfortable with it. Except when I'm with him. I really like him. This is all very new territory for me. I've done hardly any dating in my life. I was always either in a relationship or not.
We have talked a good bit about our divorces and I know that he (like myself) was very hurt and I do think he could be a bit gun shy. I guess I just wish I knew if that was his reason for moving slow or if there are other reasons, you know?
My gut tells me that he is a good guy. I don't think he's slimy or anything like that. (Why I trust my gut after marrying my ex I don't know!!!)
It feels better just to tell you guys.
I guess I'm sad right now because I was hoping he would call tonight. But I don't want to be like that... waiting around for a guy to call and sad when he doesn't. I've been single and happy for 2 years...
Ok. Go ahead. Tell me I'm nuts!!!
Thanks for listening.