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10 yo looked at inappropriate stuff on net at friends house. what to do? - Page 4

post #61 of 70
When I was five I saw a dramatization of a minor fender bender on PBS. That little 5 second snippit caused nightmares for MONTHS, and I still remember the clip with an odd sensation of dread (very odd since I went on to become a paramedic and saw much, much, much worse.)

Deliberately exposing your children to blatantly disgusting and harmful material could in some states cause criminal charges to be levvied against you (think, contributing to the corruption of a minor), and for good reason.
post #62 of 70
Coaching kids to hide stuff from their parents can be a predatory behavior in itself.

If an adult who just HAPPENED to work for the online pornography industry taught my child to cover her tracks, the police would be called.

In its own small way, this very discussion demonstrates just how bad things have gotten online.....porn advocates even showing up on parenting sites to demand justification why our children are not fair game........
post #63 of 70
What a great observation Galatea.

Curiosity is one thing. NORMALIZING is another. What children view becomes normal to them particularly since they have no actual REALITY to compare it to.
post #64 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by GalateaDunkel View Post
Coaching kids to hide stuff from their parents can be a predatory behavior in itself.

If an adult who just HAPPENED to work for the online pornography industry taught my child to cover her tracks, the police would be called.

In its own small way, this very discussion demonstrates just how bad things have gotten online.....porn advocates even showing up on parenting sites to demand justification why our children are not fair game........
post #65 of 70
Haven't read the other responses... I would tell my daughter how to delete the browsing history and then have her tell her friend, so her friend can stop worrying about the parents knowing. I would not tell the friend's parents.

But, I would honestly tell my child that I felt she was too young to be looking at these things, and that she shouldn't feel ashamed but should reconsider what she exposes herself to or doesn't. I would also urge her to reconsider friendships with people who are browsing adult material at such a young age, but again, ultimately she has to make the choice, not me.
post #66 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by GalateaDunkel View Post

In its own small way, this very discussion demonstrates just how bad things have gotten online.....porn advocates even showing up on parenting sites to demand justification why our children are not fair game........
Well I'm a porn advocate as well, and an active member on this parenting site since 2004, and I'm not "demanding justification" of anything.

Please don't lump all porn advocates together. Thank you.
post #67 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by meowee View Post
Haven't read the other responses... I would tell my daughter how to delete the browsing history and then have her tell her friend, so her friend can stop worrying about the parents knowing. I would not tell the friend's parents.

But, I would honestly tell my child that I felt she was too young to be looking at these things, and that she shouldn't feel ashamed but should reconsider what she exposes herself to or doesn't. I would also urge her to reconsider friendships with people who are browsing adult material at such a young age, but again, ultimately she has to make the choice, not me.
Wow! Another person saying they would teach the friend how to delete the history. You know what? Parent how you want to parent but keep your nose out of how someone else chooses to parent. I am appalled!
post #68 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Heavenly View Post
Wow! Another person saying they would teach the friend how to delete the history. You know what? Parent how you want to parent but keep your nose out of how someone else chooses to parent. I am appalled!
: :
post #69 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by GalateaDunkel View Post
Coaching kids to hide stuff from their parents can be a predatory behavior in itself.

If an adult who just HAPPENED to work for the online pornography industry taught my child to cover her tracks, the police would be called.

In its own small way, this very discussion demonstrates just how bad things have gotten online.....porn advocates even showing up on parenting sites to demand justification why our children are not fair game........
Well said.
post #70 of 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
I'd tell them how to clear the search history, too, if the friend's parents are going to freak out over this.
I wouldn't do that...

My exp. with this is to ask you dd if she has had any on-line issues she'd like to talk through with you. Also at that time, reinstate that you are trusting her to use good judgment online at ALL times. Not in a threatening way, just a parental way, kwim?
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