Starting montessori "late"- how does it work out?

[Awaken]

Have any of you started your kids relatively late in Mont.? If so, how was the transition? Were they lost at first, or did they quickly learn the routines of the classroom and the different jobs?

Our son is 5, will be almost 6 next fall and we're considering mont.- until now he's been in a public school PreK for developmental delays. It's pretty much the opposite of montessori- very, very teacher directed, almost 1:1 adult direction, and like most public schools in general the kids *must* be doing certain skills at certain ages/grades or they're behind. We want something different for him for K and up.

So much of mont. makes total sense for him...he's very needy, wants grownups to do everything for him, and needs a lot of cueing. So I think the independence and pride in doing his own work would eventually be great for him. Plus he is well within range of normal 5yo development now, but is probably behind other kids with regard to "academics". I love how montessori gives kids room to develop at their own pace and doesn't go by calendar age.

I worry that throwing him into such a self-directed environment, when he's used to so much adult input and structure, would be stressful. Plus, being one of the oldest kids in the class, not knowing about the materials and work, when 3 yo's know exactly what to do, would be too overwhelming and discouraging. I myself felt a bit stressed out seeing little kids barely out of babyhood doing all this math and geography so well, knowing that he doesn't know how to do those things.

So, any parents who have been in a similar situation, or teachers who have had older kids come into their class? Thanks for any input!

[Lingmom]

I don't have an answer... yet. But I'm in a similar boat. I just pulled my 5 1/2 yr old daughter out of Catholic school. She'll be starting at a Montessori school next week. The Catholic school worked okay for her because she's a polite girl who adapts to a lot of situations. but I was disappointed by the rigidity of the curriculum and the general atmosphere of the school.

I didn't really know what happened at Montessori at the elementary level, but I checked one out and was really, really impressed. She visited both the primary and elementary class and they felt that she'd do fine to move up to the older one (she's already reading and is generally pretty mature for her age). I think she's up for the challenge of more advanced learning, but I'm curious how she'll handle being in a situation that is not teacher directed.

Anyway... let me know how your son does. And I'll tell you about my daughter as I find out!

[nkm1968]

My kids started Montessori at ages 4.5 years and 1.5 years....but, over the years (they are now 15 years old and 6 years old) they have had a lot of "first year extended day" classmates (kids without previous Montessori who join a 3-6 year old class as 5 or 6 year olds) and pretty much, despite lots of handwringing from the directresses, my observation has been that after an initial adjustment period (weeks to a few months) these kids do just fine. My youngest is a "fourth year extended dayer" meaning we kept her in the 3-6 class for 4 years (summer birthday) and although she is the oldest kid in her class by a month, the new "first year extended day" kiddo is a 6 year old boy who is absolutely brilliant and is doing the most advanced work in the class and is socially the most popular and empathic kid in there, he was homeschooled (I gather from his mom mostly unschooled but spied on his big sister's lessons) and they moved to our part of the country and she decided to go back to work. So all the hand wringing of the school directresses was for naught! On the other hand, there are kids at our school who started the toddler program at age 2, have been in the Casa since age 3, and because of developmental challenges will not be ready for the extended day even when they are 6 (and instead do 4 years of just the morning work cycle). So I think it really depends on the kid and on the directress. Myself, I would recommend Montessori at any age and as early as can be afforded by the family or easily managed emotionally and developmentally by the kid, whether that is at age 3, or 5, or 9.

N.B. Many, if not most, Montessori schools tend to favor kids who start before the 4th birthday, so you may need to be especially tenacious in lobbying for admission! But IMHO, it is worth it!

[eco_mama]

My DD will be starting right after she turns 5. I asked the teacher about it and it didn't seem like it would be a big deal. She would be starting in primary as a "extended day" student so it would be the full 9am-3pm.

I wish I could've started her at 3 but that just wasn't possible. I'm planning to enroll my DS at 3 though. (As long as he's ready.)

[trimomma]

Ds's first year in M was for the first grade (last year). It took him a little while to get the transition, as well as learn how to use the materials. He's reluctant to change, though. He's also very driven internally and loves having the freedom to move at his own pace. Last year, he had a friend in his class that had Asperger's and was working a few 'grade' levels below what he would've been doing if he were in a traditional setting ~ and it wasn't a big deal to *anyone*.

I have a good friend that had her same-age son in a traditional private school last year and it wasn't working at all for her son. He just started the M school my ds goes to for 2nd grade. It took a lot of conversation with the directors to have them consider her son. My friend's main concern for the M school was that she felt her son needed a lot of cueing (like you're saying about your son, OP) and that she didn't think he would thrive in the independent environment, particularly since he was getting all the cueing in the traditional school and *still* wasn't getting his work done on time. As it turns out, the work wasn't interesting to him. Since school has started, she said she has seen major changes in her son's personal responsibility ~ with regard to school work, taking charge for his own personal care at home (she was having to help him find clothes to wear in the morning, make sure he was showered well and clean, etc etc). My friend told me the other day that, while she loves that her ds loves school and learning now, what impresses her most about the M environment is how the kids become interested in taking pride for themselves and their work, responsibilities, helping others, etc.

[AdInAZ]

We are starting dd in 1st grade next fall at age 6 in a Montessori for the first time. I asked the director, 2 teachers at the school, and the lady who was giving me a tour (a parent of kids at the school) if they envisioned any problems with late starting montessoris and they said they hadn't had any problems with it in the past. In fact, my tour guide started her ds in 2nd grade and he is currently thriving now in 6th grade. I'm sure there will be a transition period, but kids adapt soooo fast. But for my ds, I'll be sure to start him at age 3.

[Awaken]

Thanks so much for your responses. It is encouraging to hear that for the most part it works out fine after an adjustment period. I also talked on the phone to another mom from the school we're considering, whose son started at 6. She said at first he did all the really basic stuff, like buttons and snaps, etc and she was worried he was getting nothing out of it, but they let him work through it, and soon enough he was on to more of the upper level activities.

Originally Posted by trimomma

I have a good friend that had her same-age son in a traditional private school last year and it wasn't working at all for her son. He just started the M school my ds goes to for 2nd grade. It took a lot of conversation with the directors to have them consider her son. My friend's main concern for the M school was that she felt her son needed a lot of cueing (like you're saying about your son, OP) and that she didn't think he would thrive in the independent environment, particularly since he was getting all the cueing in the traditional school and *still* wasn't getting his work done on time. As it turns out, the work wasn't interesting to him. Since school has started, she said she has seen major changes in her son's personal responsibility ~ with regard to school work, taking charge for his own personal care at home (she was having to help him find clothes to wear in the morning, make sure he was showered well and clean, etc etc). My friend told me the other day that, while she loves that her ds loves school and learning now, what impresses her most about the M environment is how the kids become interested in taking pride for themselves and their work, responsibilities, helping others, etc.

LOL, this is us!! We really encourage learning to try things on his own before crying for help, but he is a long way from dressing, bathing, etc on his own. I would hate to play to his weaknesses by putting him in such an independent environment, when so far he's doing great in a structured (yet still play based) environment, yet I feel like independence is what he really needs! However, public K is not playbased so the fun would probably end next year anyway!

We'll see what happens- the school said it is not highly likely that there will be a spot for an older kid, since all the younger ones move up. But, you never know who may decide to change schools- if no spot opens up for him, then I know it wasn't meant to be!

Lingmom How did your dd's starting the new school go?

[Lingmom]

Lingmom How did your dd's starting the new school go?

Fantastic! I adore her teacher and her 9 classmates seem like very nice "big kids". At her previous school all the kindergarteners were doing the letter of the day and learning a list of sight words and counting objects and writing the number down on worksheets. Now, in her class she's learning about volcanoes, learning to sew, reading a book on fossils, learning about "big numbers" and fractions and cursive and calendars and flags. I can see how much more relaxed and happy she is and it totally makes me more relaxed and happy too!

As for the adjustment, she didn't seem to have any trouble at all. Her other classmates are mostly 8 yr olds, so she's considerably younger, but they welcomed her and apparently like to help her out and she likes them a lot. Her teacher said that she's bright and happy and articulate and is learning to work independently just fine. So for us, it was a very good fit!