My mom wants to kill herself

[fairejour]

My mother is bi-polar. She has no insurance so she has been "weaning" herself off her meds. She doesn't listen to us or her docs about this. We also suspect she has alzheimer's.
Today she went to work and left her car running all day. Someone called the police thinking she was abducted. They searched and found her husband and then eventually her. She and her husband sat down and talked about the alzheimer's. She got really upset and went home to kill herself by taking all the rest of her meds. When her husband got home he found her laying on the floor saying she couldn't do it. She said that she didn't want to be a burden and didn't want us to have to care for her. She said that she would have done it but that my DD wouldn't have understood.

[Jane]

She needs something intensive. She can be committed against her will b/c of her actions this week - get her that help, please.
I'm sorry.

[abbylotus]

wow. i'm so sorry. it sounds like she needs serious help. i hope she finds help and peace.

[fairejour]

This is the second time we have put her in-patient in the last 6 months. She refuses to stay compliant. She thinks she is doing better and that the meds are too expensive and then she gets depressed and we just start over.....

[abbylotus]

that is so tough. has she been like this for a long time...cycling in and out of episodes?

[fairejour]

Since I've know her! : We thought she was doing well for several years but when I was growing up she often thought about ending it and taking all the kids with her.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm not even surprised when I get the call.

[Astoria]

People with bipolar have a suicide rate that is significantly higher than the rest of the population. I don't remember the statistic so I won't quote it, but it is high. If she is talking about suicide and has made any gesture, she should be committed. In an episode, she is not herself and not making rational choices. It's hard, but she should be admitted against her will.

[abbylotus]

i think she should definately be committed, too. she needs to get stable and hopefully get her crap together! maybe your DD will be the motivation she needs to get well. i have bipolar disorder, too. i'm compliant with my doctors and want to be as "normal" as possible, but still sometimes things go wrong and i have to commit myself. i was in the hospital four times this year. it happens, but i think your mother needs a reason to be stable otherwise she's going to keep bouncing around like a crazy lady. man, that's tough. i really hope she gets the help she needs and she and your family deserves. peace.

[fairejour]

Turns out she DID take the pills. She felt bad and lied about it. She is in the ICU.

[Shantimama]

My mom has bipolar dosorder and Alzheimers too.

Is there a geriatric psychiatry specialist in your area? Can you get in touch with your local Alzheimer's Society and ask for resources and referrals to good people and agencies? If she has Alzheimer's, compliance and judgement go right out the window, and things that might help with a non-dementia bipolar patient do not apply any more. Even if she finds the motivation to get well, the physical changes in her brain as the Alzheimer's progresses will make it impossible for her to remember that and make appropriate judgements.

While she is in the hospital, can you arrange for her to be assessed for Alzheimer's? While she is there is a good time to get an idea if she has it and where she is in that disease process. It is not uncommon for people to be resistant to seeking consultation about Alzheimer's, especially if there is pre-existing mental illness. Getting a consult while she is there could be a lot easier than trying to deal with it once she gets home. You could also ask your local Alzheimer's Association for any info they have on what supports are available for people who do not have insurance.