DD always losing things! WWYD?

[granolalight]

7 yo dd frequently loses things: coats, lunchbox, clothes, etc. Last year we went through 4 coats b/c she lost them! This year we've already been through 2. She lost one in December. I told her if she didn't get one for Christmas I would buy her a new one. And that's what happened. Well, here it is 3 weeks later and it's already gone!: This is so irritating. Coats are not disposable and I don't want to keep buying them.

You know, when I looked for a coat in December, it was really hard to find one. I looked at Old Navy, Children's Place, the local consignment store, and Kohl's before I finally ended up finding one at Burlington Coat Factory. I'm just so irritated.:

I'm not sure how to help her be more responsible for her personal items. I could have her put $ toward a new one. This week she has suffered the natural consequences: being cold. Don't worry, she wears sweaters and we live in Texas, it's not that bad. Frankly, I'm surprised that the sweaters have made it back home.

WWYD?

[lolar2]

I don't specifically have ideas, but I think for maximum responses you should cross-post in the "Decluttering/ Organizing" subforum of "Mindful Home Management."

I might be able to help you if there are more details-- where does she typically lose these things? And when (I mean, is there a particular day of the week when her schedule is weird and that makes losing things more likely)?

[artgoddess]

Do you pick her up from school or friends or after school care where she is likely to loose things? Do you have a check list you can go through with her before you leave school grounds? Where is your coat? Where is your lunch box? Didn't you have sweatpants on under that skirt when you left this morning? Where are those?

[granolalight]

She usually loses these things at school. She takes the bus home. In fairness, when she leaves the house in the mroning the temp might be in the 30s or 40s. When she gets out in the afternoon, it is typically in the 60s, so maybe she gets warm and leaves it on the bus?

The aggravating thing is that she never seems to have a clue as to the last place she had it.

I have to buy her a new coat today. I don't want to shame her, she already feels bad. But I want her to understand that this is a big deal and she must keep track of her stuff. How can I do that?

[Alyantavid]

I feel your pain! I just bought my 5 year son 2 pairs of gloves Saturday. He's already lost 1. He's constantly leaving his hat on the bus or at school, his gloves rarely stay together all the time. I even bought the ones that will clip together, but it doesn't do any good.

I don't know what to do. I just keep reminding him after recess to put his stuff all in his backpack so he can't forget it. But its not working so well. I can't let him go without, we've had a high of 20 degrees this week and I won't let him go without a hat and gloves.

[granolalight]

Originally Posted by Alyantavid

I feel your pain! I just bought my 5 year son 2 pairs of gloves Saturday. He's already lost 1. He's constantly leaving his hat on the bus or at school, his gloves rarely stay together all the time. I even bought the ones that will clip together, but it doesn't do any good.

I don't know what to do. I just keep reminding him after recess to put his stuff all in his backpack so he can't forget it. But its not working so well. I can't let him go without, we've had a high of 20 degrees this week and I won't let him go without a hat and gloves.

When we were little, my grandma used to knit mittens for us and they were connected by a long piece of yarn that went through both sleeves and across the back, so that the mittens always stayed with the coat. Genius!

[zeldamomma]

Originally Posted by granolalight

7 yo dd frequently loses things: coats, lunchbox, clothes, etc. Last year we went through 4 coats b/c she lost them! This year we've already been through 2. She lost one in December. I told her if she didn't get one for Christmas I would buy her a new one. And that's what happened. Well, here it is 3 weeks later and it's already gone!: This is so irritating. Coats are not disposable and I don't want to keep buying them.

You know, when I looked for a coat in December, it was really hard to find one. I looked at Old Navy, Children's Place, the local consignment store, and Kohl's before I finally ended up finding one at Burlington Coat Factory. I'm just so irritated.:

I'm not sure how to help her be more responsible for her personal items. I could have her put $ toward a new one. This week she has suffered the natural consequences: being cold. Don't worry, she wears sweaters and we live in Texas, it's not that bad. Frankly, I'm surprised that the sweaters have made it back home.

WWYD?

Hmmm... I would: #1 put her name in her coat on a big label, to increase the chance of getting the coat back if she forgot it. and #2 Shop for coats at thrift shops, so losing them was less of a financial loss. At 7, I would expect her to help pay to replace the coat somehow too, either with extra chores or pitching in her money.

ZM

[Mamato2and2]

Dd2 is constantly loosing things too! I feel your pain. This school year it seems to be better-she's in third grade. I put her name on everything but that didn't help...I guess her school doesn't look at the tags just throws them in the lost and found, which gets taken away regularly.

What I did was on the last day of school (after school was over) I would go through the lost and found and grab sweatshirts, jackets, etc that were cute and in good condition. I asked the school if I could and they didn't care since they were going to be donated that day anyway. While I know this doesn't correct the problem of loosing stuff....at least I didn't have to worry about replacing things....

[granolalight]

Originally Posted by mika3

Dd2 is constantly loosing things too! I feel your pain. This school year it seems to be better-she's in third grade. I put her name on everything but that didn't help...I guess her school doesn't look at the tags just throws them in the lost and found, which gets taken away regularly.

What I did was on the last day of school (after school was over) I would go through the lost and found and grab sweatshirts, jackets, etc that were cute and in good condition. I asked the school if I could and they didn't care since they were going to be donated that day anyway. While I know this doesn't correct the problem of loosing stuff....at least I didn't have to worry about replacing things....

That is a great idea!

I put dd's name on everything but it doesn't seem to help. By the end of the school year, the lost and found area is an entire classroom full of stuff. It's unbelievable. Just goes to show that my kid's not the only one who loses things!!

[lolar2]

Hm, OK, here is what I would do (even though it is pretty elaborate):

I would talk to her teacher for a few minutes and mutually put together a detailed play-by-play of DD's day. Then you can identify times that things like coats are most likely to be lost, and figure out a system for tracking them.

To a PP, mitten strings are now not sold in children's clothing because a few children strangled on them.

[Halfasianmomma]

Perhaps you and your DD can come up with a checklist she has to go through at the end of school?

DSS has 2 checklists because he is also a very forgetful boy; in the morning, he can't sit down to play until
-he's gotten dressed in uniform
-tidied up his bedroom
-made his lunch and had it ok'd by dad or me
-put his backpack together
-had breakfast
-brushed his teeth

In the afternoon coming home from school, he has to:
-Remove his school uniform and hang it up
-Write down homework assigned for the day
-Empty and put away his lunch bag

Could you perhaps put together a similar list for her, and explain that it's to get her into the good habit of remembering all her things? Also buying really cheap items and explaing to your DD that she can't have anything "nice" until she proves that she's responsible enough to have it, is a good option.

Re: the mittens with strings, we used to have these elastic with a clip on each end to attach mittens to the sleeves of coats. DSS was rough when playing so they'd come off and he'd have trouble re-attaching them. I ended up just sewing his mittens to a short thick elastic connected to his sleeve. DSS says it embarasses him in front of his friends; DH told him that he'd just have to prove that he'd able to avoid losing his stuff and we'd remove the elastics.

[alllyssa]

"on the last day of school (after school was over) I would go through the lost and found and grab sweatshirts, jackets, etc that were cute and in good condition. I asked the school if I could and they didn't care since they were going to be donated that day anyway."

I've done the same thing too! I wouldn't buy anything until you've gone to the school and checked out the lost and found. It's probably there.

Good luck,

[snoopy5386]

I am also confused with how she is losing these things at school or on the bus, isn't there some sort of lost and found??? I agree with the labels.

[granolalight]

Originally Posted by lolar2

To a PP, mitten strings are now not sold in children's clothing because a few children strangled on them.

I'm not surprised. Then again, back in the day when Grandma made these for us, we were riding in the front seat on the armrest or laying in the back window to feel the warmth of the sun...

Originally Posted by Halfasianmomma

Perhaps you and your DD can come up with a checklist she has to go through at the end of school?

She has a "before school" checklist and a "before bed" checklist. These are very helpful. Perhaps we just need to be more diligent and when we notice she doesn't have her coat, start investigating immediately so it's more fresh in her mind.

Originally Posted by snoopy5386

I am also confused with how she is losing these things at school or on the bus, isn't there some sort of lost and found??? I agree with the labels.

We do label her clothing! Last year (when she lost 4 coats) I did go to lost and found to search for them but did not find them. It is a mystery...

[LilyGrace]

Originally Posted by lolar2

.

To a PP, mitten strings are now not sold in children's clothing because a few children strangled on them.

But mitten clips are. They're like short shirt garters - one end clips to the mitten or glove and the other end clips to the jacket sleeve. They're only about 6 inches long, if that, so no worry of strangulation!

[lolar2]

Another thread reminded me, sometimes "lost" things have been stolen by a bully. Even if she isn't regularly being bullied, sometimes little thieves occasionally pick on a new target for a short time. That might be worth mentioning to the teacher to keep an eye out.

[Emmeline II]

Originally Posted by zeldamomma

Hmmm... I would: #1 put her name in her coat on a big label, to increase the chance of getting the coat back if she forgot it. and #2 Shop for coats at thrift shops, so losing them was less of a financial loss. At 7, I would expect her to help pay to replace the coat somehow too, either with extra chores or pitching in her money.

ZM

There are iron/sew on labels that you can put 4-5 rows of information if you want to.

[lightheart]

is it possible that she is loosing these things on purpose? does she really not like the __ but is afraid to speak up and say I'd rather have a certain brand/style in hopes that you will eventually pick out the 'right one'

maybe have her help you shop and she can pick out something, maybe if it came from her choice she will want to keep up with it more.

coould you encourage the habit of it you take it off then put it directly into your backpack make it a rule in the home too, not just in school or away from home so that it is reinforced over and over.

does she loose little things? maybe a fanny pack would help, just have to make sure she doesn't take it off and leave it sitting somewhere.