Help me convince my BFF to breastfeed!

[aaronsmom]

What can I say to my BFF of 16 years to convince her to breastfeed? She is 28 weeks pregnant and will be going back to work after her maternity leave. She says she can't breastfeed because she'll be working. I explained to her that her workplace is required to give her unpaid time and an appropriate place to pump. I know it will be more difficult than if she were a SAHM but it will be best for her baby! How do I convince her?

[elanorh]

I don't know what her legal rights are, in terms of pumping time - that will likely vary from state to state.

So That's What They're For! is a great book that I think explains bf very well in a humorous manner, it's an easy read, and I think reaches 'mainstream' mothers well. I'd recommend getting it for her (loan her 'your' copy) - and suggesting that she read it and then decide. It's got a good chapter in it about pumping while working outside the home.

Stress the fact that mothers who WOH take fewer sick days to care for their babies if they breastfeed, than mothers who don't bf (there are stats on this somewhere). If you have a mutual friend or acquaintance who's worked outside the home while breastfeeding, perhaps you could suggest that the two talk about it (If you WOH and bf, then you're the obvious candidate for this conversation but if you know others you can suggest that's even better).

If you're giving her a baby book or something, give the Sears' Baby Book, as it talks extensively about bf and how important it is.

If she's concerned about the costs of a good pump, suggest that she register for one - and that she look at the costs of formula-feeding. Even a hospital-grade pump costs less than formula-feeding with store brands!

[miss_sonja]

You might want to talk about the myth of all or nothing. A lot of moms don't think it's worth starting to nurse because they'll be going back to work so soon. That first milk that baby gets from mom in those early weeks is so important. Colostrum is important. And, often, women change their minds about going back. She can always stop later, but starting up after not nursing (relactating) is hard.

Good luck. I also recommend So That's What They're For.

[merry-mary]

I think it's best to start slowly: I agree with the PP - tell her to push the eventual return to work out of her mind for now. There is plenty of time to breastfeed the baby in the meantime. Once she is about to return to work, she can then decide whether to continue and pump or whether to start formula. Hopefully by then she will love BFing so much and see how amazing it is (for her, for baby and for their relationship) that she will do everything possible to keep going. Right now, everything probably seems so overwhelming.

Obviously, breastmilk is best. She probably knows this already. You can also tell her how much $$$$$ and time she will save by breastfeeding. Formula is expensive. Bottles can add up.

Also, you can appeal to her own sense of self: breastfeeding can help you lose weight, quickly. I know it differs from woman to woman, but I gained 45 pounds in my pregnancy and lost over 55. Breastfeeding did this: nothing else.

I think it's best to focus her on the near term: those first few weeks and months are so very important! I would hate for her to not even try simply b/c she plans to return to work at some point.

[maine06]

©2000 Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC 136 Ellis Hollow Creek Road Ithaca,
NY 14850

Breastfeeding your baby for even a day is the best baby gift you can
give. Breastfeeding is almost always the best choice for your baby.
If it doesn't seem like the best choice for you right now, these
guidelines may help.


I've removed the entire article, as MDC's copyright policy requires that quotes be 100 words or less. Maybe someone could post a link?

[jennbet6]

I'll share my current experience. I work as well and maintain breastfeeding. I was able to get twelve weeks off and I exculsively nursed. My MIL then watched my baby when I went back to work. By that time, we had a nice routine down. It was baby's routine, I'm not a supporter of forced schedule feedings! :
I would feed her before I left in the morning. I would come home and feed her and then pump once or twice at work. She would only get one-two bottles a day of expressed milk. I would come home and nurse through the evening and we would start again.
It is possible! I'm very fortunate that I was able to stay at home for as long as I could. That helped get my milk supply established. I think that and sticking to a routine helped. Its so easy to give her formula! But I made it a priority and she has truly benefited from it.

[aaronsmom]

[QUOTE=maine06;10374872

WHETHER YOU NURSE FOR A DAY OR FOR SEVERAL YEARS, the decision to
nurse your child is one you need never regret. And whenever weaning
takes place, remember that it is a big step for both of you. If you
choose to wean before your child is ready, be sure to do it gradually,
and with love.[/QUOTE]

I'll email this to her.

[PatioGardener]

I told my best friend that I loved her and her unborn baby so much that I was going to be completely honest with her, and I wanted her to be honest with me. I told her that I wanted to support her to make sure that the baby was not exposed to the risks of formula feeding, and that I would be there for her and help her to breastfeed for as long as she possibly could. She was very honest with me and told me that she thought she could go for 2 months. She ended up breastfeeding exclusively for 6 months, and slowly weaning onto formula as she introduced solids. She overcame many problems to go for that long, and 'out breastfed' everyone in her mom and babe group. I'm super proud of her, and we are still best friends. She knows that I wanted to support her as she breastfed a 2 year old, and she respects that. I know that she breastfed longer than she initially wanted to, and worked very hard to get to 6 months, and I respect that.

[maine06]

Originally Posted by maine06

©2000 Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC 136 Ellis Hollow Creek Road Ithaca,
NY 14850

Breastfeeding your baby for even a day is the best baby gift you can
give. Breastfeeding is almost always the best choice for your baby.
If it doesn't seem like the best choice for you right now, these
guidelines may help.


I've removed the entire article, as MDC's copyright policy requires that quotes be 100 words or less. Maybe someone could post a link?

SORRY about that! I don't have the link, but, if anyone wants the copy, PM me and I can send it.