Originally Posted by Lemon Lady
Are there any HSP moms around?
For those of you who are HSPs, I'm interested in whether you feel that parenting has been different for you than it is for others who are not highly sensitive. It has always been quite a task for me to reap the advantages of my sensitivity and to manage my life so that I don't become overwhelmed, which happens rather easily. What, if any, benefits do you see in being an HSP and a parent? What drawbacks? Any particular coping mechanisms you've developed to manage?
I'm so relieved to know I'm not the only one! I've spent years feeling inadequate as a parent because so many little things make me nuts! I'm still trying to find ways to cope because I often feel like I should live by myself.
Originally Posted by thriftyqueen
I am a beginning to realize that I, as well as my son, am highly sensitive. Noise really bothers me. It was really hard for me when DS was a baby because he cried a lot and I couldn't handle the sound. Anything high pitched, continuous, loud really bothers me. I love quiet. Some people like to have a TV or radio on all day. I can't stand it. It is hard for me when DS and DH play loudly together. I have to leave the room most of the time because the noise drives me crazy.
I am highly sensitive to scents as well. We are chemical/scent free in our house for this reason. DS is sensitive to these things too. I have a hard time in public because the smells really get to me.
I think it is hard to parent as a sensitive person because sometimes you just can't get away from the things that get to you.
When my ds was an infant I thought I'd go insane. He was colicky and rarely slept and I was so sick with hypo and ppd I really thought I'd die before we both got better. I cannot stand high pitched sounds, and I just hate it when the rest of the family is home for more than a couple of days (think school vacations) because my dh and dsd like the tv on all the time
and I hate it.
I can't stand it when I'm somewhere and both a tv and music are on at the same time. I find it irritating when one of the kids wants to play a handheld video game while watching tv. I personally have lived without a television but dh is a tv addict, so this is a constant battle we have when everyone is home. I spend a lot of time holed up in another room or, as Ruthla said, in front of the computer.
Smells make me physically ill, so often when I do go out I end up having to move or leave because of some intrusive odor.
Originally Posted by LauraLoo
The worst noise for me is when dh watches some sporting event on TV -- I can't handle that "haaaahhhhahhhhhh" spectator noise in the background, and then the commentators yelling above the noise when something happens. I might as well be chewing glass.
OMG! yes! I hate that sound! I can't stand sports anyway, but I think the noise factor is the biggest part of it.
Originally Posted by sledg
I have trouble with noise (too loud or too many noises at once-like when everyone tries to talk at the same time), chaos, too much visual stimulation, crowds, being touched too much or having people in my space too much. I have trouble with the kids' meltdowns-I get can get worked up very quickly when they meltdown, it's just so...overwhelming.
All of that. I can't stand for people to invade my space. Both of my dcs are sensitive and a bit clingy, so we're at odds there. Dsd has a particularly strident tone that comes out daily when she is irritated and it grates on my nerves. Both dcs seem to delight in irritating each other which leads to bickering and the sound makes me want to find a rubber room. Noise without a purpose puts me on edge. If you aren't going to watch the tv, why is it on?
Trying to find ways to attend to everyone's needs is the hard part. Dh and dsd seem to really need
noise, where I need quiet, and ds seems to be able to deal with either. Since dsd got an ipod with earbuds she is able to do things quietly for longer periods of time now.
We're finding headphones are a wonderful tool to cut down on some of the noise. Sudden noises drive me batty as well, and I honestly don't know how to do anything about those. How do you stop your dcs from dropping things? I find smaller houses noiser, also. I grew up in the midwest where houses are larger and yards are as well. Here, everything is so close together that if someone has something on in one room you can hear it all over the house. There's no upstairs or basement to put any distance between you. I always feel like everyone is right next to me invading my space.
People always act like I'm weird for wanting my space, and for wanting my quiet. I've always felt like noisy people who like to be crowded like a litter of puppies were weird, yk?