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Internet Preventing a Nice House?? - Page 3

post #41 of 84
2/5/08 at 4:53pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemyfamily6 View Post
This really hit home with me. ShareBear and ReadingMama too. I spend SO much time online. I have good intentions. Trying to figure out the best way to handle our home, the best way to raise our kids, etc. Except as you said, the living gets lost in there. Sometimes I act as if my kids are an annoyance, an interruption in my online time. They are the absolute best thing in my life. I love them with all of my heart. This thread is making things crystal clear for me, and helping me realize that I need to get my priorities in order. Thank you.
Oh, same here. I feel exactly that same way. I have a serious problem, and want to fix it. It's only when DH is gone; he has no idea how much time I spend on here. I'm hardly ever on here when he's home. I get off about 30 minutes before he's due home, then I clean everything up ASAP so it looks like I did something productive.

I WANT to change this. I need help.
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post #42 of 84
2/5/08 at 8:57pm
Thread Starter 
Let's all just keep encouraging eachother with this problem
Share what you have accomplished on your home and with your family and then give us ideas on how to limit computer time (timer? etc)
post #43 of 84
2/6/08 at 3:26am
Quote:
Originally Posted by simonboy'smommy View Post
then give us ideas on how to limit computer time (timer? etc)
The thing that has worked best for myself is to turn the computer completely off at the power strip when not in use. It saves electricity, so that's another plus. And it's not as easy as plopping down to point and click when you have to turn the whole thing on again and go through the first few screens.

Then, decide on a set amount of time AND a set number of times per day. Whatever you decide is not as important as actually deciding BEFORE your day begins how long you will spend on the computer and how many times you will turn it on in a day.

Let's say you decide on 30 minutes in the AM and 60 minutes in the PM. (And let's face it, even though you might look at that and think it's WAY too much...it's likely a whole lot less than the average addict is currently spending online.)

Whatever you decide on, write it down. SET A TIMER when your minutes begin, turn on the computer, enjoy. Flip it OFF when the timer goes off. Period. The end. No matter what you're in the middle of. Turn.it.off.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

The internet really can be an addiction, and it should be taken seriously if it's interfering with your real life relationships.

Another idea I've had before is to take the batteries out of our keyboard. They are a PITA to take out and put back in, so it made me VERY aware of how often I was getting on the computer. If your keyboard is plugged in to your computer, unplug it and take it as far away from the computer as you can in your house. Stick it on a high shelf and only get it out for your set number of minutes. Sounds crazy, but it works.

Heck, at one point, I considered asking DH to take the thing to work with him. How sad is that?
post #44 of 84
2/6/08 at 3:33am
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommyofmany View Post
Oh, same here. I feel exactly that same way. I have a serious problem, and want to fix it. It's only when DH is gone; he has no idea how much time I spend on here. I'm hardly ever on here when he's home. I get off about 30 minutes before he's due home, then I clean everything up ASAP so it looks like I did something productive.

I WANT to change this. I need help.


I do the same thing. I wish I didn't. I feel so rushed when I go that route. And it dosen't help when ds follows me everywhere wanting to help especially when I just want sit down and play with him. I need to get a better routine going. I have to fix this. :
post #45 of 84
2/6/08 at 4:22am
My son suggested I give up MDC for Lent and I think it's a good idea. I need a break to get out of the habit of spending hours a day on here. Good luck everyone with finding balance. I'll check back in with you after Lent (assuming I really can go that long without visiting MDC!)
post #46 of 84
2/7/08 at 5:49am
: I hear you
post #47 of 84
2/7/08 at 11:40am
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovemyfamily6 View Post
This really hit home with me. ShareBear and ReadingMama too. I spend SO much time online. I have good intentions. Trying to figure out the best way to handle our home, the best way to raise our kids, etc. Except as you said, the living gets lost in there. Sometimes I act as if my kids are an annoyance, an interruption in my online time. They are the absolute best thing in my life. I love them with all of my heart. This thread is making things crystal clear for me, and helping me realize that I need to get my priorities in order. Thank you.
Oh wow this really hit home with me! I come on here looking for great ideas about how to make our home nicer place, learn how to live in a more healthy manner, etc. But yes, the living does get lost in there! I think I'm going to have to implement a time limit and stick to it. I need balance!
post #48 of 84
2/7/08 at 12:31pm
It seems like to me that there are days, where I need to vent or get out frustrations (that I can't otherwise express, my DH is working crazy hours) that I do wind up here a lot.

I try to use it as my "breaks" mainly.
post #49 of 84
2/7/08 at 9:29pm
Well, I'm happy to report that yesterday was a limited computer day. I built a house out of Magna Tiles with my boys and played with them with it for awhile. I read books to them. At bedtime, my oldest said "Thank you for playing with us mommy. And thank you for being the best mommy." I kid you not. He made my day and really made me realize even more that my priorities must be straightened out!

Today, I'm on for the first time right now, while they're watching a show. I spent quite awhile in our bedroom this afternoon cleaning out my closet and dealing with the piles of clean laundry that has been piling up.
post #50 of 84
2/11/08 at 2:25am
Note: I just learned that Sundays are exempt during Lent (a Catholic thing), so I will allow myself to come here on Sundays during Lent, but not for hours.

You guys must be doing good since no one's posted in this thread for 3 days!

It felt good to take a break the past several days. I did get a lot more done around the house and my son and I had a good time together. Yay!

I'm enjoying checking in on my threads, but I don't feel that addictive or compulsive feeling. It feels good.
post #51 of 84
2/11/08 at 9:20am
Quote:
Originally Posted by ReadingMama View Post
Note: I just learned that Sundays are exempt during Lent (a Catholic thing), so I will allow myself to come here on Sundays during Lent, but not for hours.

You guys must be doing good since no one's posted in this thread for 3 days!

It felt good to take a break the past several days. I did get a lot more done around the house and my son and I had a good time together. Yay!

I'm enjoying checking in on my threads, but I don't feel that addictive or compulsive feeling. It feels good.
Great job!! I might try choosing select days for the computer. I have a kitchen and bedroom to get finished. Both projects are leaving the rooms looking terrible right now because they're both partially completed. We're having new beds delivered tomorrow, so I have to get our bedroom done today. I think I'm going to try avoiding anything but email until Saturday to see what I can get done.

Deep breath...I can do this. Thanks for the inspiration ReadingMama.
post #52 of 84
2/21/08 at 3:23am
I find that when I go on binges here, it's because I'm trying to escape something crappy going on, like when things are crappy at home or I'm just overwhelmed with home life, and then whatever it is gets worse and worse. I've been here all day, and I just feel cracked out. Sometimes I think I'm a little manic.
post #53 of 84
2/21/08 at 4:54am
This happens to me also! I get a chance during nap and After the kids go to bed, to do a few things..but I always jump on here or a few other sites instead Then I complain that I got nothing done
post #54 of 84
2/21/08 at 5:28am
Ugh! I do that too! We're self-medicating with MDC.

Yesterday I was on the computer for maybe 10 minutes and didn't watch any tv. I got soo much done around the house. I was thinking I need a time limit of maybe 1 hr a day, but maybe picking certain days is a better idea. Then I won't chop up the day with going back to the computer for 5 minutes here and there. Who am I kidding...5 minutes?

I also get on when I'm exhausted though and I don't have the energy to do much else. But that probably means I should exercise or eat something healthy to give myself a boost instead of vegging.

I'm going to have a very minimal computer day tomorrow too and hopefully I'll get lots done again
post #55 of 84
2/21/08 at 6:10am

Why?

Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaheids View Post
This is totally me. I really need more sleep. I need to exercise. I've also found while I am addicted to MDC, I am also addicted to blogs. I read all of these crafty, simple living and green blogs (in addition to all the great info gleaned here) and it sends my mind spinning to more things I want to do, that I don't have time for (because I'm on the internet) or am too tired for (because I stay up to late, and don't exercise). I love to gather information and inpiration. I have so much in my head...all the time, I just don't do anything with it- which makes me feel bad about myself, in turn.
I'd like to ONLY spend time on the internet during my daughter's naps- 30 minutes maximum. I honestly think my marriage is suffering because I spend hours on the internet at night after DD goes to bed instead of re-connecting with DH. (He watches sports while I am online.)

I think it also feeds my need for intellectual conversation.
Quote:
Originally Posted by simonboy'smommy View Post
You sound like me. I get all this inspiration on the net, but I need to get off so I can actually LIVE it kwim? I've been that way for years though. I seem to be adhd or something I'm not hyperactive, but I'll read like 4 books at once instead of finishing one at a time. I jump around on the internet. I start lots of projects, but finish very few and that makes me feel bad about myself. It's like I run out of steam and have to constantly have something new to look forward to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by simonboy'smommy View Post
The internet and MDC have been very good for me. I need to find a balance so that it remains a blessing and not a problem


I've been thinking about why the internet has been a problem for me and I've come up with a few reasons:
  1. too tired to do anything productive (though sometimes tired from being on the internet ) but want to stay awake to veg out a bit (esp. if I haven't had a break from the kids all day)
  2. feeling lonely but it's too late to see anyone IRL and dh is either at work or busy or gone to bed early
  3. dh and I have lost a lot of our connection so we usually don't take opportunities to spend time together when we could
  4. when dh is available to look after the kids, it's a way of withdrawing from being constantly talked at (I'm an introvert but my 4 yo talks constantly)
  5. very important for networking IRL relationships - I have met amazing people through the MDC tribe threads
  6. research is like a hobby for me and the internet is super entertaining for the part of my brain that likes to free-associate and be exposed to new ideas and eye candy (interior design stuff) - it's my strong divergent thinking side (from the book The Edison Trait)
  7. I have problems with procrastination that started long before I met the internet
  8. lost of the habit of reading books in my free time
To me, it's very important to identify the reasons so that I can address the underlying causes, rather than just being hard on myself for overdoing it .

I already do have boundaries for myself about when I go on the internet - I rarely spend more than 5 minutes on the internet when I'm looking after the kids unless it's quiet/nap time because my kids demand pretty constant attention. For me, rather than set time limits on how long I can be on the internet, I would like to set boundaries about what I want to accomplish before I go on the internet. For example, it would be cool if I did 10 minutes of exercise, 10 minutes of meditation, 10 minutes of paperwork, and 30 minutes of houseowork before going on the internet. If I did that consistently every day, I think that I would feel better in general, and maybe use my time better as a result. OTOH, sometimes I just feel so burned out by the time that I have free time
post #56 of 84
2/22/08 at 12:32am
Something that has helped me...

I tape a piece of paper to the computer on which I can write the things I want to do next time I'm online. That way I can resist the temptation to hop online the minute something pops into my head that I'd like to look up. Seems like every time I get online just to look something up for a minute, I end up sidetracked for half an hour or more. So keeping a list and "consolidating" those internet visits to one scheduled time (or just postponing them till after I get the dishes done, or accomplish something else I need to do) helps me to use that internet time more effectively instead of wasting it meandering through, for instance, people's blogs (I wish people wouldn't link to their blogs in their signatures here, it's sooooo distracting).

Hope that made sense--I'm forcing myself not to re-read/re-think/re-type this post like I would usually do, since it's my bedtime.

I really do need to schedule my internet time. Actually, I need to get my whole life on more of a schedule, but that's another thread.
post #57 of 84
2/25/08 at 2:20am
Wow, has everyone been totally successful and left me here alone? In my credit, I have dome quite a bit around the house today, but not at the expense or cracking out here.
post #58 of 84
2/25/08 at 11:22am
Our internet was out last sunday and monday and i could not believe the amount of stuff I got done.

I also have started keeping a list of stuff to do while online in hopes that it will keep me from surfing for hours.
post #59 of 84
2/25/08 at 11:30am
Nope, still addicted. My big problem is games. DS and I get playing games and lose track of time. Ooops!
post #60 of 84
2/25/08 at 4:26pm
I've been doing fairly well. Last Monday I set up my home management binder and I've been pretty successfully doing ten minutes at a time of cleaning tasks. Some days I have to make myself not get on here at all though or I feel like I won't get off. I have to say, my house and kids behavior are all better!