I had to lie!

[Baby_Cakes]

I had to straight out lie and I feel so bad about it! Ladies, what would you do?? I just had a co-worker come up to me and say, "Maybe you ARE pregnant, you've been wanting french fries all the time." At first I was like, "I always want fries, what are you talking about?" Then another co-worker (the one who I told, who is keeping my secret safe) said, "She's on the rag, just leave her alone!"

So now, it's official. I lied about it. I feel awful. I feel like one of those people who calls out of work and lies that their Grandma died, and then the next day their grandma dies. Did I just jinx myself? And now, how do I get out of this in a few weeks when I *DO* tell the office?

Gah! Lies, lies, lies!!!

Have any of you had to lie? I wasn't planning on telling for at least another 4 weeks, so it isn't like I could or would have fessed up (and especially not to this particular blabbermouth) so now what?

[ItalianWishes]

They will understand when you tell them! They will probably just laugh it off, and say "I knew it".

I just ended up telling everyone, hopefully I don't regret it! But I was so excited to be pregnant after trying for 12 cycles!

[Rani]

We waited 3 months to tell anyone. Lie away...they always laugh and they understand. My dear friend told everyone right away, then miscarried and it was awful...so don't feel guilty...its better to wait...

[AKA_PI]

Jumping in from the August DDC, I'll be 13 weeks tomorrow and are still denying pregnancy to some people until week 14. I'm showing but hey, I want to tell when I'm ready to tell. Nothing wrong with that. They will understand.

[Mrshawwk]

I don't really see that you lied. I am very big about always telling the truth, but all you did was avoid the question. Fear not, my friend, I think lightning shall not strike!

[lovingmommyhood]

May DDC~

This is totally something it's okay to lie about! People will understand! I got a lot of "oh you brat!" when they found out I had lied. You do what you gotta do.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by Mrshawwk

I don't really see that you lied. I am very big about always telling the truth, but all you did was avoid the question. Fear not, my friend, I think lightning shall not strike!

I didn't exactly lie, Amanda (co-worker) said that I was on the rag. That's a lie. I'm totally not. That's what I feel sheepish about.

Originally Posted by AKA_PI

Jumping in from the August DDC, I'll be 13 weeks tomorrow and are still denying pregnancy to some people until week 14. I'm showing but hey, I want to tell when I'm ready to tell. Nothing wrong with that. They will understand.

Thank you for saying this! Ok - you're right, it is my news to tell when I want to tell it, and no sooner!

I feel better, a little. And when the time comes to tell, you guys are right, they'll just say "We knew" or something like that and it'll be cute.

Whew. Thanks again!

[ColoradoMama]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes

I didn't exactly lie, Amanda (co-worker) said that I was on the rag. That's a lie. I'm totally not. That's what I feel sheepish about.

Your friend lied. You just chose not to rat her out!

When I was pg with my first - I know immediately - from conception. I don't know how, I just did. Well, the very day AFTER I conceived, my co-worker told us she was pg (due 6 weeks before me). There were only three of us in the office. She said she was going to quit to stay home with the baby when he was born. Well, I knew I was going to quit and stay home with my baby. For a week and a half, my boss was talking about how we would restructure the office, yadda, yadda, yadda. I kept nodding my head and saying, "Yea, yea, yea." I felt like a total fraud, and I didn't even have a positive pg test yet! Wow - that was a long winded way of saying - I know how you feel!

[Lexi_029]

LOL You didn't say you were on the rag!

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by ColoradoMama

Your friend lied. You just chose not to rat her out!

When I was pg with my first - I know immediately - from conception. I don't know how, I just did. Well, the very day AFTER I conceived, my co-worker told us she was pg (due 6 weeks before me). There were only three of us in the office. She said she was going to quit to stay home with the baby when he was born. Well, I knew I was going to quit and stay home with my baby. For a week and a half, my boss was talking about how we would restructure the office, yadda, yadda, yadda. I kept nodding my head and saying, "Yea, yea, yea." I felt like a total fraud, and I didn't even have a positive pg test yet! Wow - that was a long winded way of saying - I know how you feel!

Ooh - tough situation!

Originally Posted by Lexi_029

LOL You didn't say you were on the rag!

This is true, I didn't actually lie. She lied. Ok, ok, I like the way you guys think!

[Slabobbin]

Ok - I'm out of the loop. Someone tell me why you would deny or lie about your pregnancy? Wouldn't those close to you want to be there for you if (goddess forbid) you did miscarry? Is that the only reason people would want to hide the pregnancy?

[leurMaman]

That's too funny Someone asked me if I was pregnant last week and I lied. Of course, it was before I tested...so technically not a big one. Your french fries crack me up. I lied all through the first part of my first pregnancy. It was unplanned, I'd only dated DH for 3 months, and we were quickly planning a wedding. A coworker came to my office carrying a large plastic bag with a box inside and I said, "who sent you flowers?" She just stared at me! THen she sat the bag down, took the box out of it, opened the box, unwrapped the cellophane, and showed me a dozen florists roses. "You smelled florist roses through cellophane, a box, and a plastic bag! How did you know there were flowers in here?" Then her eyes got wide and she said, "You're Pregnant." I tried to lie after that, but she knew that my heightened sense of smell was no coincidence and just winked at me a lot after that.

[Changed]

Well, I tried to lie.

My mom: Are you pregnant?
Me: I don't know.
Her: When will you know?
Me: I don't know.
Her: Are you lying to me?
Me: I don't know!!
Her: I can't believe you're lying to me!
Me: It's none of your business anyway!
Her: I am your MOTHER!!!! Everything about you is my business!!!

And so on and on and on.

[DreamsInDigital]

Originally Posted by Slabobbin

Ok - I'm out of the loop. Someone tell me why you would deny or lie about your pregnancy? Wouldn't those close to you want to be there for you if (goddess forbid) you did miscarry? Is that the only reason people would want to hide the pregnancy?

Our reason for keeping our pregnancy secret for now is simply that this is our fifth baby and many of our family members will not be entirely supportive. I'd like to keep life positive as long as possible before subjecting myself to negativity.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by Slabobbin

Ok - I'm out of the loop. Someone tell me why you would deny or lie about your pregnancy? Wouldn't those close to you want to be there for you if (goddess forbid) you did miscarry? Is that the only reason people would want to hide the pregnancy?

Well, it's my first. I'm only 4 weeks. This is just a co-worker. I don't know, I don't feel comfortable telling this person who could let it slip to my boss, other co-workers...

It's my news to tell, not his. I just didn't feel right with it being this early. I don't want to have to untell work folk. Family might be different, friends are different, but co-workers are a different breed. I don't need the gossip at all.

[ItalianWishes]

Originally Posted by Slabobbin

Ok - I'm out of the loop. Someone tell me why you would deny or lie about your pregnancy? Wouldn't those close to you want to be there for you if (goddess forbid) you did miscarry? Is that the only reason people would want to hide the pregnancy?

I also think that the more people I tell, the more prayers I will have on my side! Hope it works!:

[Kim919]

Originally Posted by Slabobbin

Ok - I'm out of the loop. Someone tell me why you would deny or lie about your pregnancy? Wouldn't those close to you want to be there for you if (goddess forbid) you did miscarry? Is that the only reason people would want to hide the pregnancy?

I waited untill 13 wks to tell

I agree with above that family may not all be suportive and I needed time to adjust myself before being subjected to all the negativity.

Also, its nice to have a nice fuzzy warm good secret all to yourself for a little while, especially if your sharing it with your partner and its like something special just for the two of you.

Also, I dont know if anyone else is familiar with this or my mother made it up but she has always REALLY badmouthed people who tell before three months. She is supersticious(sp?) and thinks that telling too early is bad luck for miscarriage.

I did lie to several people all of whom laughed and said "I KNEW IT!" when they actually found out.

[triple07]

Tell them that it was your personal choice to keep it on the DL. You are under no obligation to tell anybody until you feel comfortable! And I am pretty sure that they will understand.

Tee hee hee. I didn't realize this was all the way from January I was thinking to myself, I thought Carrie already "came out of the closet" with the pregnancy...

[crosscat]

babycakes I did it, too! And I'll do it again!

Last week the man who works in the office next door to me virtually chased me down the hall and asked me to turn around, at which time he stared at my belly for a while and said "Hey your belly is sticking out a little bit, do you have some news to tell us?"

I was absolutely flabbergasted! I'm a terrible liar, but that was definitely NOT how I pictured breaking the news at work. I told him that he was being rude and he should never ask a woman if she's pregnant! He dropped it, but I think he probably knows. Anyway, I didn't confirm his suspicions, but the most I could do was shake my head no. Like I said, I'm a terrible liar! But I sort of lied, I guess.

I don't feel guilty about it, and when he finds out (maybe next week) for sure that I am pregnant, I doubt he'll think of me as a liar. I'm sure your co-workers won't think any less of you, either.

Don't worry about one bit! Enjoy those fries, girl.

slabobbin You really can't think of any reasons why someone might want to wait to tell people at work? I can think of dozens. Remember, baby_cakes is talking about her co-workers, not her friends and family. I know for myself I rely on support from my friends and family during my pregnancy, and if "something bad" were to happen, I would be grateful for their support during what I can only imagine would be a very dark time for me. What I would hate in such a situation would be having people who work in the same building as me, many of whom I don't know very well, come up to me after a miscarriage to ask how my pregnancy was progressing.

Also, I would not want a random co-worker to "guess" I was pregnant, and then have my boss find out through the grapevine before I had the opportunity to inform him myself. Very unprofessional.

As for myself, I'm still trying to decide if I want to quit my job or try to work out a work-at-home arrangement. I'm waiting to tell anyone here until I am prepared for the work-related discussions that will follow the announcement.

There are lots of reasons why it's different sharing the news of a pregnancy at work compared to among your friends and family. And, even when it comes to telling friends and family there could definitely be situations where a person may want to wait to tell, as well.

[Baby_Cakes]

Originally Posted by triple07

Tee hee hee. I didn't realize this was all the way from January I was thinking to myself, I thought Carrie already "came out of the closet" with the pregnancy...

I did! This is a really old thread!

Although, I will mention that when I finally told the co-worker I lied to in my original post, he said, "What, did you just find out this weekend or something?" and I laughed and said, "No, I've known for 3 months, you idiot!" and he was totally thrown. So, yeah. That was funny.

A lot of my co-workers told me they had suspicions, but no one actually confronted me. I was lucky. I did slip a few times, b/c people wondered why I wasn't going to the gym as often as I used to, and I would just stammer and kind of walk away. But if anyone did guess, nobody said anything until I chose to reveal my news.