Help me relax over my child's upcoming interview

[KBecks]

We have found a Montessori school that we like and are in the admissions process. My 3 year old will be called for an interview in the next week or two. The interview goes like this -- we'll meet with the admissions director in the waiting area, then she will take my son to a classroom alone (with an active class) and they will go to a table and do some activities that the admissions director says "he can do", like simple puzzles.

My son is confident and independent and usually has no problem separating from me. It's only once in a while on bad days that he doesn't want to (we have a lot of practice because he goes to gym childcare once or twice a week and grandma's once a week). I'm assuming he'll do great at his interview, but part of me is stressing a little..... he's an average capable, active and confident 3 year old boy.

I guess I'm intimidated because I saw the kids' work and they have done some great things, 5 year olds writing 2 sentence essays in cursive..... and the kids are calm and work quietly, etc. I know it will take my son a little while to learn the rules of the Montessori classroom, etc.

I'm wondering if I should practice anything at home. The admissions director only told me to talk to him in advance about the separation from me so that he'll be more comfortable with that aspect of it.

I'm going to try to relax.... watching my son play with his train set last night I know he has the focus to play independently and work on his own. I just hope he's in the mood for puzzles on interview day.

[GuildJenn]

Honestly I wouldn't worry about it - I don't think anyone can or should cram for admission to schools under the age of... 18

[mightymoo]

Yes, I know they call it an 'admissions interview', but the impression I get is that the director wants to get a good idea of your sons capabilities and personality, not necessarily to judge him as worthy of the school so much as to balance out the classrooms appropriately. At least that's what our director does. She wants her classrooms balanced, so hopefully roughly the same proportion of 3 year olds as 4 and 5, boys and girls, and similarly quiet children and more energetic kids. I am loving this balance with my DD, she is rather shy and socially more reserved, but she has made friends with a much more energetic and socially friendly boy. She I think helps him focus on works and whatnot, and he helps her open up and socialize.

However, she doesn't take the kids into a seperate room, she just talks to them in the same room as me. My DS's interview is next week, and I've already gotten signed the contract for him (DD already goes to this school).

[Lillianna]

The interview is designed to give the child and parent some one on one time with the Directress. The Directress will want to see that the child responds positively to direction given by the parent and that he will respond positiviely to her. Also, is the attachment bond between the parent and child healthy? Is the child confident enough to separate from the parent briefly (within reason). The Directress will work with the child to get an idea of his strengths, interests and level of concentration. The interview is also about the parent's understanding and support of Montessori, so the Directress should spend some time talking with you about what activities your child does at home, how independent he is with self care/ how you encourage independence as well as what your discipline style is.

[KBecks]

Well, I'm currently reading Montessori: the Science Behind the Genius. Maybe I should study for the interview!

Thanks for the replies. On the local moms boards some people have felt very uncomfortable with the fact the child is asked to go leave the parent and go to the classroom and spend time with a class away from the parent. I understand the assessment of independence though. I think Alek will probably do just fine. I'm the anxious one.

[Lillianna]

We do our interviews with the parent in the room. Sometimes the parent comes along for the lesson even, sitting next to the child. If needed, I would present a lesson to the parent who could then show to the child. But I would prefer to see a child who could come away from the parent briefly. This shows a healthy attachment. The child knows that the parent would not him go with someone who is untrustworthy.

[Maluhia]

Remember that our children feed off our energy so if you are nervous he will be too.

I told myself - is she is not what works in this class I want them to see that so I don't send her somewhere she does not belong - kwim?

[Golden]

At our Montessori school, they take the kid to an unoccupied classroom without the parent also. You can watch through the observation window if you want.

[Zadee]

I wouldn't worry. I was VERY concerned that my son wouldn't be able to separate from me but he just had his first "trial day" with the Directress at the Young Children's Community (toddler room) and he was so excited about the materials he literally forgot about me. He was pouring water from a pitcher to a basin and got soaked so I had to go get a dry shirt from the car and I watched him through the observation window on my way back. This is a boy who HATES to have me leave the house, even if I am leaving him with his grandmother whom he adores. But at the YCC he was so absorbed in what he was doing he didn't even notice I had left the room.

OTOH I was so pleased with his confidence and trust. OTOH, my baby is growing up. *sob*

(I never had any concerns about his twin sister - she's much more independent and was equally comfortable and unconcerned that I stepped out. Normally they have the parent step out on the second trial day but since I hadn't brought my diaper bag in with me that step got bumped up.)

[KBecks]

Originally Posted by KailuaMamatoMaya

Remember that our children feed off our energy so if you are nervous he will be too.

I told myself - is she is not what works in this class I want them to see that so I don't send her somewhere she does not belong - kwim?

I am trying to maintain that perspective, and if Alek doesn't take to the school then I want to know that and that its' not the right place. There isn't an observation window so I'm going on faith and whatever he tells me about how it went. He's pretty clear about what he likes and doesn't like so I don't think it will be a problem.

Now I'm worrying about when the call for his interview will come. I sent the application in at the end of Dec, we did the parents tour at the end of Jan and I know they're working out their re-enrollments, etc. We're probably near the first in line for new placements. I'm thinking of whether to bug the admissions director but I think I can wait until next week.

[KBecks]

Well, the interview was today and we'll hear back tomorrow. I'm excited to find out what they decide. I think he did just fine.

[mamamelia]

goodluck!!! let us know how it went!

FWIW, we had our observation and parent interview today too.. so i know exactly what your talking about regarding nervousness! overall, i think the principal was quite pleased with dd but we won't find out till next week where dd's position on the waiting list is. fingers crossed for the both of us!

[jen1511]

Montessori mom

My daughter has been in Montessori since she was 2 1/2. She is now 6 and in first grade, also Montessori. When her primary years were over, I need to look for another school. The school she was in did not offer elementary. I looked at it as I was doing the interviewing. I ask myself the question, would this be a place I would want to be all day long. Are the teachers and assistant compassionate, caring, and really seem to have the special talent that Montessori teachers need.

I went to several before I found the perfect one. She has done fantastic this year and I realize that by being so "picky" really made a difference for her well-being.

You are investing in your child's future, you know what is best. Hope this helps!

[KBecks]

Originally Posted by mamamelia

goodluck!!! let us know how it went!

FWIW, we had our observation and parent interview today too.. so i know exactly what your talking about regarding nervousness! overall, i think the principal was quite pleased with dd but we won't find out till next week where dd's position on the waiting list is. fingers crossed for the both of us!

My son's interview went very well (even though he had a cold and was tired) and he's been offered a spot in the fall class. Now we will review tuition contracts and any other questions we want to ask before making a deposit. In the meantime, we just found out we are expecting baby #3 at the end of September this year, so it will be a lot of change for us all around the same time!

[mightymoo]

We had ours a couple weeks ago and DS did soooo well. He can be extremely stubborn and he was a little bit, but didn't throw a major hissy fit which I was worried about!

Glad things went well, good luck making your decision!

[MattBronsil]

A great book for any parent worried about an interview might be this:

http://astore.amazon.com/monteblog-2...674808-0433226

It's called "Our Peaceful Classroom." It is pictures drawn by students in Montessori rooms and has a lot of the materials that they would normally see. Children in the 3-6 classroom love it.

Matt