Why do people assume I breastfeed?

[janellesmommy]

I've had several women ask me, during small talk and admiring my baby, "Are you still nursing?" These are women I've never met before. Why would they assume that I breastfeed? Formula feeding is so common.

Is it my large breasts? My chubby baby? The glow in his skin? The lack of bottles in my possession? I've really wanted to ask them but I'm kind of shy.

[Ziggysmama]

Maybe its a combo of all of the above...
Or maybe its because breastfeeding is the biological norm and these women know it?

[avedagrrl]

I would hope that it indicates that breastfeeding is the expected norm, which would be awesome since in so many instances FF has been substituted as the way babies are fed.

And then there's my DS, who asks every woman with a baby if their baby gets "nana" or "mama milk". And I am happy to say that most of them have said yes!

[bbrandonsmom]

Nursing pad outlines? I take it as a good sign. I'm one to ask that too, but usually try to spot a sign first that the mom is breastfeeding. That's not real helpful is it?

[Kanga]

I can usually tell by the baby's skin.

[meganmarie]

I do often ask this question, and I guess it is like the pp said, I assume bf is the biological norm. At least 70 or 80% of women do initiate bf at birth these days, right, according to stats? So "are you still" is most likely the right guess - although since so few continue to do so through 6 months, I realize the answer has a good chance of being "no"

[mamajake]

I can't imagine asking a stranger that question but I can usually tell by the way the child acts around mom's breast. There is the subtle or not-so-subtle "baby boob grab." I find breastfed kids lay their hands or heads on mom's breast in a different way. I have exchanged a knowing smile with a mom after a child reaches into her shirt but I would never say anything if I didn't know her.

[AstridS]

Originally Posted by Ziggysmama

Or maybe its because breastfeeding is the biological norm and these women know it?

Yeah, that!

[readytobedone]

is your baby there when they're asking? could be something to do with how your baby interacts with you...or even SMELLS! the other day the office manager at my chiro practice told me that she can always tell a FF baby from a BF one by the way they smell! i have no idea what she's talking about, but then again, i haven't smelled a lot of babies in my life, and most of the ones i see these days are nursing!

[Mama Poot]

Originally Posted by mamajake

I can't imagine asking a stranger that question but I can usually tell by the way the child acts around mom's breast. There is the subtle or not-so-subtle "baby boob grab." I find breastfed kids lay their hands or heads on mom's breast in a different way. I have exchanged a knowing smile with a mom after a child reaches into her shirt but I would never say anything if I didn't know her.

This would be me and 18m old Henri! He freely sticks his hands in my shirt and pats my chest saying "Mama! Mama!" then makes the milk sign. He also buries his head in my chest all the time-although my non-nursing 2 year old does the same, but maybe that's because of his little brother's influence.

[mommyddeville]

Originally Posted by readytobedone

is your baby there when they're asking? could be something to do with how your baby interacts with you...or even SMELLS! the other day the office manager at my chiro practice told me that she can always tell a FF baby from a BF one by the way they smell! i have no idea what she's talking about, but then again, i haven't smelled a lot of babies in my life, and most of the ones i see these days are nursing!

I have both friends who breastfeed and friends who formula feed, and the difference in how their babies smell is amazing. Breastfed babies have the most gorgeous sweet smell to them. It's one of my favorite things about breastfeeding. . . my babies smell so sweet.

[Dandy]

It is the norm in my "circle" to breastfeed for at least a year and, to be honest, we are pretty mainstream So it might just have been curiousity! I recently asked a mom about whether she was breastfeeding her 1 yr old, because she is also 6 mos pregnant. I didn't know her that well, and I usually am not so forward, but I was so curious about whether she still had enough milk, did she plan to tandem, etc. I think she was actually a little insulted by the idea that a pregnant woman *wouldn't* be nursing her little one. And she is mainstream in every other way!

It's very encouraging

[Mrs.Bufford]

I get asked that more often than I would have ever expected. I think part of it is the interaction and bond between mom and baby. I had DD in a sling at Target the other day and I was talking to her all through the store (as I do everywhere, I look like a crazy woman) and this lady goes "you must breastfeed, huh?" so I said yes and she told me that she hadn't seen a mom use a sling unless she was a breastfeeder. People also can pinpoint that she is my first somehow... so I vote that its the interaction.

Then again, now that I think of it my breastfed baby doesn't stink like her formula fed friend...so there's that.

[APmomto3boys]

I don't "look AP" at all and people always assume that I ff'd.

[Meredith&Alexander]

Because you are obviously a cool and amazing person?

[Meiri]

Why would they assume that I breastfeed? Formula feeding is so common.

Because in the earliest months, maybe formula feeding is not quite as common as we're lead to believe? or as the companies wish?

Because breastfeeding is the norm, the default method. Why not assume that the mom is following through on that if she possibly can?

[Bellejar]

I usually assume if I see a child under one that it is breastfed. To me it is the biological norm, but then again I have put my foot in my mouth more than once.

Or it could just be because your so cool

[Romana]

I usually work from the assumption that women are breastfeeding, because that's what's normal to me. I'd rather say that and have someone say, "Oh, I didn't breastfeed, yuck" or "I couldn't breastfeed" than feel like I think BF is icky or unusual or something. I always express sympathy if a woman says she couldn't BF - if she's saying it, she believes it, and was probably disappointed it didn't work out. Then I compliment the baby.

[Khourtniey]

I would ask so I could get excited to see another breastfeeding mother.. I dont think Ive ever met somebody... or had any of my friends who were breastfeeders.. Not even giving it a try.

[julie128]

Maybe they're just making conversation?