~+~+~Nov 05 Mamas moving on into Feb ~+~+~ - Page 2

[Phoenix_Rising]

Originally Posted by MamaFern

we leave next week for home. im sooo excited, and a bit nervous too. its going to be weird to come from this busy loud house to our quiet little haven in the country..but im looking forward to the simplicity of it. i miss my bed and my kitchen so much! ill miss mdc.

rue turned 1 week old last night! but it feels like months already.. she is still so happy and content with the world. i have tons of milk now, thanks to the mamamilk tea ive been drinking by the gallon...so she is even more happy if that is possible. we have had a few baths and she loooves water. the first time she got this look on her face like.."im home!" it made me cry.

I'll miss having you on here regularly but I TOTALLY understand the need to be home. We lived with my MIL for almost 2 years after Keagan was born (we've been home three months) and oh boy was I ready to be in our own space again! And about being home in the water - Keagan did the same thing. I'm pretty sure I did cry - and then laugh and the hormone surges

Originally Posted by flapjack

Steve lost his nerve on the hippie name

I know a couple of people named River - I love the name. Not something Allison would ever be okay with naming a child though because of the "hippie factor".

Originally Posted by MelW

In bad news, the recent rain has confirmed that the "fixing" of the leak in my car a couple of weeks ago was totally inadequate. We're taking it back in next week for re-diagnosis. I can't believe that we've spent so much money and still have a soggy car. That needs brake work, too. : I want to join a sophisticated car co-op where the expenses are fixed and I don't have to deal with the minutiae of car ownership!

If I remember right you are in the PNW, right? Have you checked into Flexcar?

[*Amy*]

I cut Brynn's hair. It's really cute!

[DucetteMama21842]

Way cute!

[Awaken]

Originally Posted by Gunter

i have missed you all these past few days. since friday, i was at a post partum doula training from 8am-6pm every day. it was fabulous to be in a room full of women so concerned about caring for new moms and to be on the verge of being a new mom, again myself. the best part was that i totally fell in love with my babe-in-utero so strongly.

I want to spend more time checking in! But as always I'm at the end of a loooooong day and only have time to read, not post much. Gunter, I am excited to hear about your training- I am taking it March 28-30th! I am looking forward to it, yet it will be hard to be away from home for 3 days, plus I work a full day before and after it- so I'll be away for 5 days in a row! It's almost 2 months away and I'm already worried about leaving the kids for so long!

Was the class useful, and worth it? I feel like a lot of it I already know...the breastfeeding info and supporting new moms, I just need to get more experience. What I really need to know about, is the business aspect of starting a doula business, and I'm not even sure they go over that in the class!

[HoneyTree]

Holy cow! We stayed quiet long enough to make it to the THIRD page! Well, here's a .

OK, does this make me a bad person? Most months, I'd like to get pregnant. Dh feels otherwise, but is not insistent on it. And because I chart, I can tell roughly when the timing is good, though I think my chart is on the wacky side of f*cked up, so very often it's anybody's guess. So in the heat of the moment, unless he specifically asks, I don't really offer the information about the state of my cervical mucus, temperatures, cervix, etc.

I sometimes feel like this is on the verge of trickery. But we've had a few close calls in the last several months, and dh is always pretty OK with it. He's a very roll-with-it kind of guy. So then I think it's less trickery and more just me moving us toward a decision that he just probably wouldn't get around to making.

But I wondered if any of you would mind sharing how you do/would handle this. I just have this sense that a lot of partners are reluctant to "plan" for kids or more kids, but that this fact doesn't really reflect their feelings about actually having more kids.

And there's always the possibility that I'm just a bad person.

[*Amy*]

Originally Posted by HoneyTree

And there's always the possibility that I'm just a bad person.

Hee hee.

My two cents is that if he's not vehement about it, and he's not asking, it's not bad or even trickery. It's like the military: Don't ask, don't tell!

[Queen of Cups]

Anyone else celebrate Mardi Gras today with the kids? We did!!!

Its been amazing weather here the last couple of days... I'm loving taking long walks with Ellie in the stroller! I hope the weather holds a few more days so we can go hiking.

I think if someone is opposed to having kids they are usually VERY vocal and clear about it. Just my $0.02.

[DucetteMama21842]

Originally Posted by Queen of Cups

I think if someone is opposed to having kids they are usually VERY vocal and clear about it. Just my $0.02.

What is Mardi Gras about even? Seriously have no idea.

And ITA with Q of C!

[MelW]

Originally Posted by Susannah M

If I remember right you are in the PNW, right? Have you checked into Flexcar?

Yes, there was a great co-op in Vancouver that I wanted to join. We're in Oregon right now, but probably moving back to BC this summer and then I'll investigate options depending on exactly where we end up. I spent a couple of days fantasizing that that spy satellite would plummet to earth and land on our parked car, since I'm pretty sure it would be covered by insurance. And it would be cool enough that maybe we'd get to be on Letterman or something.

Now I'm less despondent, and am taking it back to the shop to get the leak re-assessed in the morning. But my bike has had two flat tires in two days and was badly in need of a tune up, so is also in the shop. How can both of my main modes of transportation go out of commission at the same time?! I guess I'll be walking a lot in the next couple of days

HoneyTree, I'm the dissenting voice on this one. I don't think you're a bad person, but I think you need to have a serious conversation (we call them "clothes on" conversations; not in the moment). It's the kind of situation that could really build resentment if you're not quite on the same page. If your DH doesn't want to have a baby right now then he needs to take responsibility for some birth control, but you need to communicate that somehow. And if he kind of actually wants to have another baby, then he should stop pretending that it's all your idea

Awaken~ I hope your doula training goes well and your business is successful!

Amy~ Cute haircut Brynn!

[flapjack]

Honeytree I'm putting this out here on the main thread, but I need you to remember that this week you should have been cuddling a newborn. The whole "baby" issue is probably very very real for you right now, and for your DH, and you need to talk about it. ALL of it. Including how he felt about the miscarriage. I also think that your views are probably very hormone driven right now. Are you reading the H&H thread?
The other thing I know, however, is that Steve does not want to know anything at all about my cycles. The idea of deliberately timing sex when we knew I was fertile was just icky and wrong to him- don't get him wrong, he loves our fertility. He just wants to perceive us as fertile and fecund all the time, rather than just for 2-3 days a month because of course, men are. BUT also, if you dtd at that time of the month and no baby, if you know that she's fertile, then what does that make him?????? It's a minefield...
Unromantic though this sounds, and though it'll slow down conception, I say throw away the thermometer and shag his brains out

Queen of Cups, we just made pancakes. The village my dad taught in had an annual football game though- take a pigs stomach, inflate it and then all the young men of the village hurtle through the town like hooligans with the aim of dumping it in a stream. Fun times, huh? It's amazing what northern men can do for fun, and it mostly involves pigs or sheep... For them that don't know, yesterday was the day before Lent, so Fat Tuesday (or over here, Shrove Tuesday)- a last day of profligacy before austerity. So the British traditionally celebrate by making pancakes, one of the most austere foodstuffs imaginable. Boy, nobody can say we don't know how to party

Mel, I'm so sorry your wheels are out of action. Is this time to start playing the lottery?

Amy, I love the haircut

Mary, Gunter, yay with the doula training

Us? We're still struggling with the baby name issue, despite the sig. He's still gorgeous, though his left eye's a bit goopy and he's a touch jaundiced- the cord fell off on Tuesday and it's all going far- too- quickly. I'm below pre-pregnancy weight as well : and it doesn't feel like I had a baby six days ago. and Skye? In the last week has

insisted on testing EVERYTHING first, from Hotslings to newborn prefolds.
breastfed a rescue hero
taken advantage of feeding time to sit in the breakfast cereal drawer pouring porridge oats into rice krispies.
Ground three packets of KoolAid into the carpet
and so on Bless her, at least she's creative. It's fair to say she's not a big fan of being a big sister. Oh, and the whole family keep losing the baby: Alex got very confused when I picked him up from school on Monday and he couldn't see the baby, but everyone else could: in a wrap on my chest. Isaac lost him twice yesterday, and Skye is just fascinated by the double buggy. Oh, except that she'd much rather travel in the shopping basket underneath : There's really not much you can say to that, is there?

[DucetteMama21842]

Oh Helen,

I hope things get easier! But can I say- I completely understand.

[MelW]

HoneyTree~ I'm sorry, I totally spaced that this is your due time from your loss Be gentle with yourself right now.

Helen~ I love your stories and how you take it all in stride. I hope Skye settles into big sisterhood.

The bike shop just called and my bike is ready. At a fraction of the cost of car repair. I bikes. We're going to push the trailer/stroller over there and pick it up in a little while, which also means I have transportation to commute to and from work tonight.

[flapjack]

All in stride : Erm, not exactly. Let's just say I now have a new set of stitch markers heading my way in return for the rest of my stash and koolaid scented playdough (you should SO try that, btw )

[Gunter]

Originally Posted by Awaken

Was the class useful, and worth it? I feel like a lot of it I already know...the breastfeeding info and supporting new moms, I just need to get more experience. What I really need to know about, is the business aspect of starting a doula business, and I'm not even sure they go over that in the class!

we did talk a lot about the business aspects. the trainer and others with experience shared their advice and what worked, what hasn't worked, how they go about collecting deposits, how to charge, back-up and child care, liability/insurance, etc... so it was very informative and got the creative thoughts stirred up for me, for sure even though i have been doing stuff as a birth doula and could just see how it may work to transition to post partum work. meeting lots of others pursuing the same thing was encouraging; that may be a helpful to you, also. if you want to get certified with an organization, then i would definitely do the weekend training. you will probably not learn a whole lot more about actual post partum care that you don't already know though! personally, i learned the most about post partum depression and women shared their own personal experiences. supporting someone after a loss was another thing that i learned a lot about, too. i did it with DONA, is that who you are thinking about?

[MamaFern]

time flies..

honeytree
helen
everyone else

rue-bee is 2 weeks old as of a few minutes ago. its amazing and sad at the same time. where did 14 days go? she was just born like 5 minutes ago, right??!! she is so sweet and yummy, except for the green snot i keep having to suck out of her teeny cute nose. why does my newborn baby have to have a cold?! anyways..we are headed out tomorow early, wont be online again for a while now..probably a week or so if i can manage to get 5 minutes on a library computer, but we shall see..

so im thinking of you all and ill update when i can.

please send us safe traveling thoughts..its going to be a long snowy road..

[Gunter]

danile- are isaac and hannah boyfriend and girlfriend...i saw that cute pic of them on your blog. ezra has a boyfriend who is 6 and he stayed the night with us last friday. he slept in a sleeping bag on her floor after they played and watched a movie together. they are so precious together! like isaac, ezra pretty much weaned completely the week of her second birthday in the beginning of nov. she has had a couple of licks since then...so i am curious about how interested she will be once this babe arrives.

susannah- i am so glad to see you around more recently. maybe i am wrong, but i feel like you were MIA for a while there. i wasn't consistent but then joined my FEB DDC last summer and was in a foreign to me country so needed my MDC support seriously! glad that you are here!

teresa- if you are a BAD person, most of us are in trouble. i think that you are fabulous and for a long time, i have wished we lived in the same town. i think you should say, "do you want to have more babies?" and just see where the convo goes. open hostility = really bad sign. ambivalence or avoidance= potential for later. mounting you=yes, he is ready. but i do think you all should have an intentional talk about it, even if it's brief. most people that i know who rely on charting...well, it just doesn't seem to prevent pregnancies, IYKWIM. hugs to you in these days when your loss may be coming up. i didn't even know about it until very recently when i saw your name on some ddc list and i was like, what? i was sad to not be preggo with you, mama but didn't want to bring it up. i look forward to hearing all about your next pregnancy, birth and labor and just to be a mom with you all over, again!

QoC- Your new haircut is gorgeous, i have been meaning to tell you! really, i looked at the pic more than once and it made me even consider short hair, again later this spring. i am not a big celebrity watcher but i saw a recent pic of katie holmes and you look like her a bit now. (that should be a compliment, just in case!) ellie's hair looks nice, too! those curls. i saw king's cakes at whole foods this week all covered with beads. way to go making it on your own.

MelW- sorry to hear about the transportation issues. it can be such a hassle. we had to replace the transmission in one vehicle recently and are low on funds these days with DH only working part-time after we both took months off to volunteer abroad. anyway, glad to hear that things got fixed so soon for ya! i miss riding bikes everywhere!

helen- i wrote this long post about the name river not being as hippie as moonbeam but lost it. anyway, i like it bunches and will just call him river if that's okay with you. or, are you calling him sam or samson? um, wow on the weight loss already and the the cord loss. which double stroller do you like? i don't even have a single one b/c we always wore ez but i think havign one now would be great with two kids. plus, we live near a fab walking trail now and i want to do it with the kids lots! the sit and stand stroller seems compact enough but no rugged for the trail.

amy- love brynn's hair and how great that you cut it?! i cannot believe she is reading! how DO you keep up? What are your current thoughts about life direction stuff? i miss being in school and check out MSW programs every once in a while...you know, just to make sure they still exist and all. what is your PhD topic? I am so glad to hear about Brynn's sleep! It sounds like it's an easy transition for her right now. Yay! I bet that will make an overnight away from her this weekend oh, so much easier!

fern- i love when you are here and you will be missed. i will check out your blog some, too if you ever get to update it once you are back home. sending you a very peaceful car ride home full of patient people.

[DreamsInDigital]

Originally Posted by MamaFern

please send us safe traveling thoughts..its going to be a long snowy road..

Safe travels Fern. We'll miss seeing you so often around here.

[DucetteMama21842]

Originally Posted by Gunter

danile- are isaac and hannah boyfriend and girlfriend...i saw that cute pic of them on your blog. ezra has a boyfriend who is 6 and he stayed the night with us last friday. he slept in a sleeping bag on her floor after they played and watched a movie together. they are so precious together! like isaac, ezra pretty much weaned completely the week of her second birthday in the beginning of nov. she has had a couple of licks since then...so i am curious about how interested she will be once this babe arrives.

If by girlfriend you mean girlfriend... Isaac hasn't committed himself to any one girl... He has two girl friends that he adores equally.. Hannah is one of them.

FWIW, Isaac hasn't even expressed an interest in what I'm doing... and I'm not even modest about it... But he has sucked on his bottom lip since he was a baby and still continues to do so when tired or sad.

[flapjack]

Fern Stay safe.

I know I'm moaning, but honestly, I'm doing it Lots of small stuff, but we're letting it go: even Isaac and his glasses : I'm so proud of myself right now.

Gunter, it's the Phil and Teds E3- we got it preloved from a friend of mine, and it's great for what I need it for- kerbs, steps and buses, plus being out and about at naptime. I don't have a car during the week, so I use foot and public transport to get everywhere, and my pelvis isn't stable yet, so long-distance baby wearing isn't an option. I'd try Ezra in it first, though, there's not a lot of head room for a tall 2yo.

Oh, and we're pretty sure that he's staying River. I'm about to postpone the appointment at the registry office until next week, but Sam just isn't fitting him. He was River all day yesterday, and he's even turning towards his name The family are going to strop, but they'll get used to it.

[DucetteMama21842]

YAY! I love the name River!