Good things are happening in February, May '04 Mamas!!! - Page 6

[Mama Faery]

Oh, I stopped in at the wrong time. : I am in a grumpy mood and not able to think of any good news. GROWL.
Wait, wait, at least I will come and offer s to all who need them, including ME.


Actually, this isn't being sarcastic, I swear, but I got this truly awesome candle from Yankee Candle, it's a pillar with three layers, the top is Fresh Cut Roses, the middle is Vanilla Cupcake, and the bottom is Strawberry...something. And it has been burning for HOURS and it smells SO GOOD.

Also, our Monsieur Chat (Julio ) was brought to his yearly checkup and he is totally healthy. Yay.

Have a good night, mamas.

[elsanne]

Julio goes to *yearly checkups*???? Wow. You are one fastidious kitty mama.

I'm like, aaagh, because the difficulty sleeping-thing of Amara's age & stage has got me totally bonkers. I'm flyin' solo tonight as Viet is in San Luis Potosi with his brother and he really does the majority of Amara-nighttime-soothing, because with me it's a freakin' circus. I had to stop spiteful, hateful, hurt-child thoughts and wonder who this evil person is thinking these things. She just does not go down and I am on last shaky legs.

Pray for no wakies until morning.

Good news: I went "out" tonight with some great girlfriends and really cut a rug dancin'. Also, did some badass white girl salsa dancin' too. I was told, hey, you really dance well for a gringa. Uh, YEAH. I DO.

The nice part of Viet being gone, is that, well, he's gone. No haranguing me for attention. I can internet all I want.

[DucetteMama21842]

Renae- Glad you're candle smells great. Sorry it was a rough day for you.

Els- So glad that you got to go dancing and I hope your night went very sleepily.

Heath- I'm not much help in that department... but my af returns almost the instant I opened a jar of babyfood/make my own... :

And ya'll- The lumps are cystic. Mostly milk production tissue. Told to keep an eye on them and to watch out for a "piece of gravel, pea, etc." type feeling in any of them.... And to see if the masses go down when I introduce solids in six months or so, wean, etc. In short, I'm sure I'll be fine.

Thanks for the support ladies. That really freaked me out. I know this sounds totally vain, but I just wouldn't feel like a girl anymore if I had to lose my breasts.... that my husband's favorite body part... And my great grandma had a double mastectomy and died... so that was the main reason I wanted it checked out...

Just glad that's not it. Now to get all three kids fed, ready and seated in church before 11.

[Mama Faery]

Danile, good to know you're gonna be fine.
And, ahem. DH and Rowan went to church this morning...and I did not. : I really enjoyed having the house to myself, and a good friend from Canada called me and we got to talk for a good hour or so. MUCH nicer for my emotional well-being than church today, I must say.
And then Rowan came home and jumped in my lap and said "Hi Mama! I missed you!" Awww.

Oh, and YES, Elsanne, Julio goes for YEARLY checkups! He's my baby too...and they send me reminders. Sounds like you had a good time dancin'...I'm still trying to decide whether I will be going out dancing myself tonight...we'll see. I'm so lazy. :

Lunchtime now :, so, happy Sunday, y'all.

[orangecanoe]

renae--I did the opposite---left all three w/ DH and went to church! Good thing because it was a meditation service and that might've been tricky with one or two kiddos in my lap!

danile--phew!

okay...off to do more productive stuff while naps ensue!

[elsanne]

I swear, I'm gonna snap one of these days. Last night Amara DID finally sleep all night, but then we got up, and daddy had not arrived home. Stayed in San luis with his brother. whatever, would have been nice to know and plan accordingly, especially when he did not arrive until 7.30 pm tonight, and the girls were already going to sleep. He is SUCH AN ASS. yesterday I had an arrival at the big house I manage and *freak out* not enough towels, so today I drove an hour to that big city again, with the girls, hauled them around the mall, which went okay, although it's just a lot of work and tolerance and toddler slinging, and I was okay with it, but then I got more freakout phone calls from the rentees, why is the pool not hot yet? three of these. the guy in charge of the pool was mysteriously absent, S.T.R.E.S.S. People want answers, now. Amara wants whatever she wants, NOW. Especially she wants to not be in the car seat. So, very stressy time for me, get out to the house finally with 16 new towels and girls running rampant, not having eaten, arriving home still no Viet, waiting waiting his cell is out of battery...his bro tells me he left approx. 5.30 pm, after knowing I was already almost to freak out point myself at 2 pm.....
A horrible afternoon of me NEEDING some stress relief and getting none, kept waiting for that door to open so I could go for a run, on edge with Sol and worse with Amara, yelling and crying out of just-can't-do-this-anymore-ness, as yesterday I had the girls all day myself as well and nighttime, yes went out and that was fun, but still no break to speak of, for whatever reason (well, part of the going out last night was receiving the group at the house, running around, turning things on, procuring sheets, or heaters, or getting staff organized). I cannot work seven days a week and have total kid responsibility for two of them, two extremely delicate rental-arrival days...yesterday I dragged them around downtown picking up extra bowls, mugs, plates, in the market which is not easy. Very worksome with lots of stairs and one stalker kid who freaked me out until I yelled at him, and navigating the stroller on uneven sidewalks and roads is not for the weak.

I just feel like I'm about to snap. I told Viet that his non-communication about his intentions of his trip to san luis (which I thought would be up and back in one night) really messed me up, and he got defensive and has now just left. I am totally wrought with back tension and am so very, very tired. I am so sick of this. At the very least, if I had KNOWN what I was in for, I could have planned accordingly. The expecting relief and not getting it was the worst. Now, I am utterly spent, exhausted, and frustrated and feel myself getting older by the minute. I hate this. I hate this life sometimes. I can't work so hard, I just can't. It's killing me.

[orangecanoe]

Oh Els....I just want to smother you with hugs and help and give that Viet another swift kick to the nads. Yes, I will again say nads. Thoughtless that boy. Self-absorbed. So wish you could have been there with me at church today for the meditation. It was so centering and all that jazz. Going to send some of that energy your way, my dear. .....all around you, peaceful ....all within you, peaceful ..... much love!

[Miss Juice]

Oh, elsanne, I feel your stress all the way up here in the snowy north! I'm familiar with the feeling, and you are so right - there is nothing worse than expecting relief, waiting for it, counting the minutes... and getting nuthin'. Yes, if you know in advance you can plan accordingly, but it's still SO MUCH to do, so much to handle, and so incredibly unforgiving.

I hope you've had a moment's rest! And that this week is easier. And that Viet pulls his head from his netherregions and gets a clue.

I'm running a similar morning this morning, as schools are closed - which I found out after I already pulled everyone physically from their beds, got them dressed and fed. It's a logistical nightmare, starting with how and when will I shower? Fortunately it's Monday, so MIL is on duty starting at noon and I will go to work as planned. I had a whole slew of menial tasks to manage this morning that will wait yet another day, as there's no way I can accomplish most of it with all three kiddos cooped up in the house.

all.

[Sarah'sMama]

Oh, Els. I was sitting here feeling tension in my back just reading about your perilous weekend. Damn mercury. : That is just so much for one person to do alone. I am also sending your vibes of endurance and patience. And extra big vibes for some alone time.

Glad to hear everything looks OK ducette.

Meesa, how's the nephew? Still thinking of him.

Juice, I got out of bed and had the brilliant idea before getting kids up to check the telly for delays. Sure enough. One hour delay. ahhhh. laid in bed watching the news until the little ones padded in on their own. Was hoping for two hour delay, but had to settle for one.

Renae, indeed, you are the model kitty mama.

sitting here slightly dizzy from shoveling the driveway. Not only is it long, it's wiiiiide. Poor dh had a killer night on call last night and neither of us slept due to constant pages. He's working 7am-7pm today, and has a meeting afterwards, so no rest for the poor guy. so here on the homestead its a lazy, stay home day.

[DucetteMama21842]

Oh Els, I am so sorry things are letting up for you. they need to... BIG TIME. Sending lots of *easy life* vibes so that hopefully things just start going your way and people will just GET OFF YOUR BACK already! Major Hugs!

Boo on unexpected snow days when mama has to get stuff done!

Hoping Meesa's nephew is doing good also.

Hoping HJ is : beautifully.

And Boo on constant pages that leave us no rest, except- maybe your dh was a blessing in others lives...

GOtta run and attend to the crabby kids...

[Mama Faery]

Oh, Elsanne. I wish wish wish I lived nearby to come over and offer help and love and a playmate for the girls--maybe they'd play together and leave us ALONE...haha!
Seriously though, I am so sorry you're having such a rough go.

I am actually kinda freaking out this morning, I had to bathe Rowan (the next two nights have something on the menu so NO TIME for a bath, and he hadn't bathed since oh, Thursday? : Stinky pigeon!) So anyway, I got yelled at because I didn't bathe him the way DADDY does it, until I finally yelled "WELL I'M NOT DADDY!!" and he looked at me and said "I KNOW!" Damn, dude.
And he's eaten like 20 pieces of toast with jam and THAT'S IT. The pizza he happily ate for dinner last night? Yucky today. And I have to pack the diaper bag for work in a couple of hours, and then DH comes to get him and they have a church meeting to go to and I work, work work till probably 7. ANd that's if I get out EARLY.

And this is all compounded by the fact that I called a local school that said they had a pre-K program to ask about it--remember, I have ONE KID. I am a total n00b when it comes to this--and the woman I speak to is extremely rude as she tells me that it's "placement-only", not open to the public. I know now what "placement-only" means, but I didn't when I spoke to her, so I asked and she just blew air out of her nostrils and asks exasperately, "What is the PROBLEM?!" I'm like, "There is NO PROBLEM, I was just thinking of sending my kid to PRESCHOOL." And finally she gives me a phone number to ANOTHER school that supposedly has a program that is open to the public. I didn't call because I don't want to DEAL.
Like I said, upon thinking of what the rude woman on the phone said, I realize what she means by "placement-only"--special needs. But WHY couldn't she have TOLD me that, NICELY??

And then I thought back about how when I was a daycare teacher and nanny and all the terrible things I said about the parents of the kids in my care, and how we all treated those POOR, POOR parents, and I realize that karma, it is kicking me in the a$$. And I suck.
Luckily, now that I myself am a parent AND a nanny, I have been nothing but kind to the parents and kiddo in my care...so hopefully I can rework that karma. Yeesh.
Anyway, this is my morning, and I vacuumed and then my child freaked out because it was TOO LOUD, even though he never said anything about it before, and that couple with how he acted at the mall this past weekend, refusing to play anywhere there were GASP PEOPLE!! around, not to mention how much he's been freaking at music class lately, seemingly out of nowhere, and I began to truly worry that my child is going to be completely neurotic and a social outcast because OH HAI LOOK AT HIS MAMA. :

And I don't have TIME or energy this Winter to try and enroll in any other kids' programs, I work four days a week and I don't want to overschedule. Ugh ugh ugh. I am sorry I'm such a neurotic mess today. And oh hey, MEMEME post! : I don't really need solutions or anything, I am just needing to be heard. I feel like I am not a good parent at the moment and I just want to go back to bed. Ugh.

Well, rest time is soon (and then work-blah)...maybe I'll nap too.

Have a good day, mamas. Sorry for unloading all this on you...

[meesa143]

Danile~What a relief that has to be...I'm glad you're ok

Els~I'm sorry, you just can't seem to get a break. It has to come soon...right?

Mamafaery~People are so rude sometimes They think you should automatically know everything. Don't give up on the preschool thing, if they are that rude to you on the phone, you probably don't want your kids there anyway. I hope you get some rest today, that always makes me see things differently

My nephew is doing good. He's home and doing better. We found out what he has is what we all just got over. It's adenovirus Every symptom we had is explained, even down to my uti. It's crazy. I feel awful that he caught it from us, but like my sister said, his body handles things differently. They think the seizure was caused by his fever.

We have been going, going going all weekend, so I'm taking a well needed catch up/rest day at home today. I had to put K in a onesie and pants last night because he didn't have any clean jammies : I guess it could be worse....

[TurboClaudia]

hey renae, you ROCK!!!
in those I need help moments, or I am a sucktastic mama moments, or my child is gonna be so screwed up because I am a horrible parent moments, just remember, you're MMF, and we will always you.

~c

[A&L+1]

It might be a couple of days before I am back in the swing of things, but I am back at work today. Feeling a bit woozy.

Loving all of you though.

Lisa

p.s. I had an idea while sick that the MMFs should write one of those chic-lit novels about women's friendships - something about an online friendship circle with drama and suspense. And then we use the proceeds to go hang out at Els Mexico house.

[mcsarahb]

Originally Posted by A&L+1

p.s. I had an idea while sick that the MMFs should write one of those chic-lit novels about women's friendships - something about an online friendship circle with drama and suspense. And then we use the proceeds to go hang out at Els Mexico house.

Renae, our resident author - get to it!

[elsanne]

Sounds like fun, this chic-lit novel!

We could all write a chapter.

Renae, that "placement-only" thing would confuse the heck outta me.

So I'm out here at this big house, sucking up to these people on a spiritual retreat, there is woo-woo female vocal music playing, and a guy speaking loudly French on his cell phone, pacing.
People are getting massages in one corner of the house, ringing bells and burning incense in another, and sitting and writing in another.

I'm a bit calmer than I was earlier, mainly because I don't have children hanging off of me. Sol scratched her retina somehow last night and has done nothing but whine and want to be with me and clutch her eye. Poor baby. However, on top of the last two days, mama's patience is about *this* big.

Thank you all for the sympathy, every bit is nourishment to my soul. I just hope hope hope that all this stress is for a greater good, that I will learn and grow, not just have a stressful horrible life. I wouldn't mind working so hard if I had a strong home team, but I don't, and I couldn't have imagined I'd work so hard every little minute, which extends into interminable minutes, with so little support in my life. I really do *need* youguys, and I get on here eager for the support I know I will find, and I have that and my parents, and some good girlfriends irl.

[KKmama]

Tired here. Beautifully sunny day, and it's windy, which I generally don't like, but it's kind of feeding my house-cleaning energy.

I totally Lisa's idea (and that Renae should spearhead it). Awesome! (Ug on the flu, BTW... did no one else get it, I hope?)

Renae, feel free to dump. That's what we're here for! I think your pre-K error was an honest mistake (and I hope you don't mind if it made me giggle, if only because I could totally see myself doing the same thing).

Danile, relieved about your news, totally get why you'd be worried.

Meesa, about your nephew. And you didn't infect him on purpose... it's not like you can really control germs, anyway.

Yes, thinking of you as always, Els. Line me in the nads kick. I've squeezed into T's soccer cleats just for this. If it would help, I'll also take the whistle that L and Z have been blasting all morning and give him a blast to the ol' eardrum, too.

As sad as the memorial was, it was also very good, as far as those things can go. I feel for the whole family.

I have a good friend IRL who has recently resurfaced and he is in dire need. (IMO, what he needs is strong pyschiatric meds, unfortunately.) I feel so tapped out and so unable to help, but "helping" is what I do. But I'm not jumping into this one. I think all I can muster is an attempt to give him an honest reflection of where he's at, and that's about it. I feel kind of :, but there it is.

[elsanne]

KK sometimes, an honest reflection of where he's at is all you can do, and all you should do.

I'll never forget one particular ass-kickin' therapist I had, who said that as my friend, there is only so much sympathy she can or should give me (esp. wrt to Viet), because once you hear me singin' the same song umpteen times, it is not helpful to give support because there is no growth.

Now, that was about 3 years ago, and I'm singing different stanzas, but the same song, yes indeedy....I am not at all saying, please stop supporting me, but I am also well aware of the choices I made/am making that contribute to me singing this song. I am the first to withdraw support from myself, unfortunately. Need a bit more self-love...

Over this weekend, when I just about *had it* with the girls especially Amara, I sadly realized how very much I need Viet during this stage of the girls' lives. This contributes to me feeling stuck. Who knows--if I were to strike out on my own (a) would it be any different? quien sabe and b) maybe just knowing there IS no one else would create different expectations, more ability to deal. But truthfully, it frightens me deeply to not have live-in help with toddlerhood.

[KKmama]

I'll be ready to kick your ass about Viet at some point, but not now. I have the sense that right now, what you need is tenderness and gentleness and healing. Yeah, you should be looking down the road (and maybe not liking what you see), but there is a great deal of validity in dealing with the very big stuff going on right this very moment. So sit down, have a cup of tea, pull on your MM socks, and chill out.

I came back to share some very dorky good news. I got a fairly recent Tassajara cookbook (about lunches, basically) from the library, and the cookie recipes totally rock. There's a whole chapter of vegan cookies, most with very crunchy or very crunchable ingredients, and they actually TASTE REALLY GOOD. So yes, part of how I'm trying to take care of the kids (and me, of course) is with some very yummy cookies. Preparing to make almond/oatmeal thumbprint cookies this afternoon, if I can get the house clean enough.

[Jacqueline]

Hey everyone,
G woke up in the middle of the night burning up and with a tummy ache. DH took care of him since I was nursing A in bed. Came back to tell me what was going on and said G was probably hungry cause we had an early dinner/late lunch, so that may be why he woke. DH made eggs and toast which G proceeded to throw up. G went back to sleep but still has fever. He's napping now after spending the morning in front of the TV. I've been giving him some homeopathic stuff for fever and he usually responds well to it, so we'll see. He's just quite pathetic. He hasn't thrown up since the egg incident, but he's also not eaten much.

To top it all off, dh is getting ready to leave early in the morning for an interview in Massachusetts and will be gone until Friday afternoon. I'm hoping G can bounce back from this quickly as I don't know how I'll deal with a baby and sick preschooler without help. Ack!

But....on to you all....

danile--glad it turned out to be something manageable.

elsanne--just more and more

KK--cookies heal all wounds in my book, so I'm hoping you manage to make some more. Another reason I'm hoping G gets better is that I wanted to make valentine cookies with him later this week...and not the healthy kinds you're making!

heather--your sunday service sounds wonderful. That would be so great to go without kids just once!

renae--and staying home from church by yourself sounds great, too!

Lisa--hope you come out of your fog soon.