if i give formula for feed before sleep? - Page 4

[beru]

Originally Posted by Natalie143

so why do some mothers give formula then if it was so horrible? i am still breastfeeding at 12 months. i do NOT intend on stopping but i obviously think my child is still hungry when he sucks me dry and constantly wakes up at night. instead of judging me how about you try and come up with helpful solutions or atleast tell me What is wrong with it??? i didnt ask you to judge.. i came here to get information and be more informed. if i knew what was in formula and didnt mind it would i be posting here in the first place? no.. i'd be giving it to him.
I came for knowledge about what is best for a child of his age.

I don't think it would hurt your child to try it, anymore than chocolate milk. That's my analogy: you wouldn't expect your baby to get most of his/her nutrition from chocolate milk but one glass is not going to compromise his nutritional status (unless she's allergic). You could try an organic formula. My son got about 3 bottles a week on top of breastfeeding starting at 4 months and I preferred formula sweeteed with lactose because that is the sugar in breastmilk and the alternative is corn syrup...

I think a better reason not to do this is the studies a PP cited. The research says it doesn't work. That being said, studies tell you what the average baby does and maybe your baby would be different. I know my son started sleeping without waking to nurse at the same time that he suddenly decided he loved solid food. He was tanking up during the day and prior to that, he was a bit of a reverse cycler. My opinion is the formula-before-bed thing probably doesn't work for babies who are already getting "full" during the day, but it may work for an individual baby that is not.

You could try it for a week. And I don't think one bottle a day at 12 months will affect your supply in a dangerous way.

But here is a link on how to bottlefeed a breastfed infant:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/bottle-feeding.html

[beru]

Originally Posted by AlexisT

I actually agree that night waking (while not necessarily universal) is more common than a lot of parents think. Many babies awaken briefly--even cry--and go back to sleep. If your baby is not right next to you, you only notice the nightwakings that result in prolonged crying. Thanks to sleeplessness, I've been able to hear DD's sleep patterns pretty well and can confirm that she often has these brief wakings where she settles herself.

:
I used to say that my son started STTN at 8 months and he did it on his own (no sleep training). But I realize 1. he didn't really STTN and 2. I did "manage" his sleep in subtle ways. My son still wakes up at least once a night and he's 3. But he comforts or entertains himself. I am noticing this now because I am up with my infant and I get to witness it. Also, I realise now that my actions caused him to nightwean. I would offer other types of comfort before nursing and he accepted that easily because he is an easy going kid, plus he just naturally loves sleep (In the afternoons, he often will say, "I need a nap" and go to his bed on his own).

[AlexisT]

Originally Posted by mom2snugbugs

You're kidding, right?

Yes, I only meant formula is superior to cows' milk--and then said I wouldn't give either one in this case

[Shenjall]

I just wanted to add that rocking, patting, cuddling, etc my dd at one year would not work. It was only breast for her! (I just wanted to pass that info on just in case you have the same issue.)

[a(TM)?Star]

Originally Posted by MilkTrance

Cuddles and comfort? Some of my friends who have weaned did so by allowing baby to fall asleep next to daddy for a while. This helped somehow.

I'm curious as to which religion mandates 2-year weaning? If it's a very old religion, that does not make much sense to me, as babies, say, 2,000 years ago wouldn't have had much choice at night -- breastmilk or nothing.

What religion warrants weaning at 2? I'm just curious?


I think that your babe is waking more dure to seperation anxiety. He probably misses you! Feed him when he wakes, don't give him formula. This phase will pass. Just give him thw love and attention he needs, not a bunch of unfamiliar ingredients from a plastic container.

[timneh_mom]

I think 12 months is a really hard time for them regarding sleep. There are so many developmental things happening that many babies just don't sleep "well". My kids have never been good sleepers and are high needs, but they are happy as long as their neediness is being taken care of. I understand how desperate one can feel when you're exhausted and just want the baby to sleep. I don't have answers for you but I do know that formula is probably not going to make them sleep more. I have a friend whose daughter was all formula fed (long story, she wanted to nurse but had NO help...) and was a terrible sleeper, so formula is not the panacea to sleep that many people think it is.

Don't ask me how to get a baby to sleep more. I haven't figured it out yet. But I can definitely tell you lots of reasons to avoid formula and nurse as much as your babe is willing!

I have a few Muslim friends, and they have told me that they are encouraged to nurse at least two years, but I don't recall any of them mentioning that it is required to wean at two.

[Starleigh]

They're not required to wean at two.. The koran states that a child should be nursed till two unless the father objects, in which case the child can be weaned sooner. There's no age cap on nursing.

[Natalie143]

im a born muslim and from what I know of it... im not sure of the exact verse but In my and my families interpretation on it says to wean at two. This is something that is truly not up for discussion cuz i dont feel its relevant nor do i want it to be questioned. were these muslim friends converts or born muslims? im not the best follower of my religion in the form of hijab etc but i was brought up as a muslim and am amongst many religious people. but lets rather leave this subject cuz religious things arent supposed to be debated according to mdc rules(i think i saw that somewhere)



ok so im NOT gonna give him formula !!! thank you everyone for your encouragement.. i really needed the support and motivation. i needed to know that just cuz he isn't sleeping through the night im not a bad mommy that cant teach my son good habits.. he is the light of my life... if he needs boob then he gets boob... and i didnt know formula tasted yukky.. no way im gonna give it to him if its not needed(which its not!!)
also.. i think i was so sleep deprived when i posted that i wasnt thinking clearly... i thought that the reason formula wasnt good was if it replaced breastmilk and that the baby shouldn't have foreign things in its body.. but i thought once solids was introduced.. then i thought baby cereals and solid foods were along the same lines...
now i know its not
thank you so so much!!!

[scrabblelover]

I understand where you are coming from. My dd at that age was going through the exact same thing. All of he sudden waking more often, sometimes as much as every 45 min!!! She is now almost 17 months and back down to 1,2 or3 times a night. She was not eating hardly any solids then either.

I think it is completely normal. At that age they are learning to walk, talk, cutting teeth, just growing so fast. I think that has something to do with it. You could try offering a pacifier at night. If your dc has never had one they may not take it now, but it could help satisfy the sucking.

We recently moved dd to her own room. We are expecting baby #2 in July and i'm hoping she will be sleeping better by then. I also would like some sleep before this starts again. Amazingly enough she has loved it!! She's only waking 1 or 2 times and when she does she's just sitting up and smiling in bed and calls for me. She nurses and goes back to sleep. i think she was ready for the transition.

So hand in there momma, this to shall pass. You are doing a great job!!!

[ccohenou]

Originally Posted by alegna

Here's a run down of one formula's ingredients. Can you even identify what half of them are? 'Cause I can't.

I can identify all of those ingredients - milk sugar, milk protein, vegetable oils, algae oils, vitamins and amino acids. Big deal. It's a beverage. But that's all it is, and more expensive/probably less tasty than trying a protein snack near bedtime.

[mom2snugbugs]

Originally Posted by AlexisT

Yes, I only meant formula is superior to cows' milk--and then said I wouldn't give either one in this case

Got it. Thanks! Sorry...

[Mhorai]

I'm surprised about the tone of many of the comments here. The original poster asked an honest question about whether her child was getting enough to eat and from the responses you would think that she was asking if feeding her child pepsi from a bottle would solve all her problems. She's breastfed for 12 months, she's committed and it sounds like a great mom-

I'm all for natural parenting and breastfeeding and practice both myself. That said, I'm upset that as a community that is about attachment and offering understanding to our children, we would be so fast to judge another mother who is only trying to do the best she can by her child.

To make statements like "why would you give your child formula if you don't even know what's in it" or "your friends are lying to you" come from a well intentioned place I'm sure, but they read as attacks.

When someone comes to a thread asking for advice and support, I'm all for giving information as well as anecdotes from our own experience. However, I suggest that before we hit "submit reply" we take a moment and reread our posts so that in trying to "help" we don't isolate other moms like ourselves- moms who care deeply about our children and are seeking to make the best and well-informed choices they can in the often confusing and exhausting world of parenting.

[jeeves67]

I understand what you are going through

OP, I completely understand what you are going through. Although my son is only 9.5 months, his waking 3, 4 sometimes 5 times between 11 and 6 and it is starting to get to me. He eats food pretty well 3X a day, and is less and less interested in BF during the day, but reverse cycles a bit.

Because I'm ramping up to going back to work full time, I have been concerned that I won't be able to handle this.

Just today, I went to Whole Foods and bought a can of organic soy formula. DH and I just started with a new nanny share and the nanny thinks I ought to BF less often (that is a giant topic for another thread - relax, everyone, I'm not going to heed her advice). Looking around MDC for insight, inspiration and encouragement regarding my situation led me to your post, and I just wanted to say that I am impressed with your commitment to BF for 12 months and beyond, that some posters are a bit careless (it's easier to flame someone via a forum than in person), and that your doubts in the context of our largely mainstream society are pretty darned normal.

Thanks to this thread and others, I am reminded of some very important things - BF frequency is often due to additional nutritional or emotional needs, sleeping through the night really isn't that normal for babies, and that co-sleeping is truly a wonderful blessing and that those of us who do it really know how their children feel loved and well cared for.

I am also reminded that it's okay to try a couple of things, like from No Cry Sleep Solution, such as making the milk "less available" (I try sleeping on my stomach after gently removing my boy after I am tired and feel that he is done getting a substantial amount of milk), trying to let him settle back to sleep before offering the breast first, and cuddling first. I assume when none of these works that he really must be hungry.

Best of luck. In spite of how hard it is, we are all going to miss these times when they are over!

[dis]

Originally Posted by alegna

Here's a run down of one formula's ingredients. Can you even identify what half of them are? 'Cause I can't.

(From Enfamil Website)
Ingredients: Powder: Nonfat milk, lactose, vegetable oil (palm olein, soy, coconut, and high oleic sunflower oils), whey protein concentrate, and less than 1%: Mortierella alpina oil*, Crypthecodinium cohnii oil†, vitamin A palmitate, vitamin D3, vitamin E acetate, vitamin K1, thiamin hydrochloride, riboflavin, vitamin B6 hydrochloride, vitamin B12, niacinamide, folic acid, calcium pantothenate, biotin, ascorbic acid, choline chloride, inositol, calcium carbonate, magnesium oxide, ferrous sulfate, zinc sulfate, manganese sulfate, cupric sulfate, potassium chloride, potassium citrate, potassium hydroxide, sodium selenite, taurine, L-carnitine, nucleotides (adenosine 5'-monophosphate, cytidine 5'-monophosphate, disodium guanosine 5'-monophosphate, disodium uridine 5'-monophosphate).

What does the chemical breakdown of breastmilk look like? Seriously, I'm wondering, because it looks to me like most of that stuff is the proper chemical names of various vitamins and minerals and such. There's plenty of perfectly valid arguments against formula; just because it's made of chemicals isn't really a good one. Everything is made of chemicals, including breastmilk.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by dis

What does the chemical breakdown of breastmilk look like? Seriously, I'm wondering, because it looks to me like most of that stuff is the proper chemical names of various vitamins and minerals and such. There's plenty of perfectly valid arguments against formula; just because it's made of chemicals isn't really a good one. Everything is made of chemicals, including breastmilk.

Yeah, my quick search didn't turn up one of the formulas with corn syrup

Still not what I feel appropriate to feed infants and toddlers. I look for as few ingredients as possible as a rule.

-Angela

[surfamy]

Hi Natalie,

First, congats on making it a year nursing (and still going!). You are right that not many moms make it as far as you. And please don't feel bad about asking. Most of us don't have role models (i.e. our own moms) to ask these kinds of questions to. A good place to go for support would be your local La Leche League. You can ask all the questions you like without being judged.

Now, as to your question. I think most of the other posters are right that formula won't get them to sleep longer. Kids go through so many changes at this age and just when you think they are starting to sleep well, they go and change on you. Could be a tooth, growth spurt, who knows. Also, they have tiny stomachs and so they probably are hungry at night. Remember that they do have a fierce need for sucking too and that the night nursing can give them the comfort or connection with you that they need. I know my babies like to nurse all night when they are sick or are getting a tooth or growing etc.

So, as for advice, umm...I think it is probably not so much an empty belly at 1 year as much as it is a need for just plain old nursing. Your baby needs you! I always like what Dr. Sears says: "A need that is fulfilled in infancy goes away." You are fulfilling your baby's need.

Now this is not to say that it needs to be at the detriment of yourself. Look through the posts in this forum. It is filled with other mamas looking for sleep too. There are lots of different ideas and you need to find the one that works for you and your baby. They will eventually sleep longer. This much I promise. You are doing the absolute best for your child. Good luck mama and hang in there!!! We have all been there!

[simonee]

HI Natalie -- congrats for the great nursing relation you and your son have built up in the past year! I'd say, give the formula a try, if it works, great! If not, try something else. A happy mama is more important to a toddler than a by-the-book mama!

(And before the strong lactivists jump on me for saying this: my children have never had formula. The big one nursed till her 6th bday, and the little one still nurses at 4,5. And I have only one nursing breast. They didnt'sleep through the nite till well after their 3rd bdays. I know it's great when it works, but it doesn't for everybody)

A bit of formula won't kill or maim your son.