Nursing moms... weaning?

[yamilee21]

Right around the time I became pregnant, my son was still nursing 6-8 times a day. During the first month, it very suddenly decreased to 3-4 times a day, and then to 2 times, occasionally 3, until the end of the year. It has been one time a day, occasionally two since I have been in the second trimester (I am 20 weeks along). I decided not to do anything to artificially keep up my milk supply, and to just watch what would happen naturally, but until this week, I did not think that he would actually wean completely during the pregnancy - I was undecided about tandem nursing, and so just taking things "one day at a time."

My son nursed to sleep on Friday night, and nursed briefly Saturday evening. On Sunday night, I asked him whether he wanted to nurse to sleep. He tried the left breast and said, "No, I don't want this one" and then tried the right breast and said, "No, I don't want this one either." I haven't restricted nursing much during the pregnancy, although I did sometimes have to restrict the duration of the nursing session when it was too painful. He is 30 months old, which is not excessively young to wean (except on MDC, ). I'm just a little concerned, because he is very suddenly "growing up" too fast - he just started sleeping in his own bed in his room (his choice), no longer wishes to be worn in a baby carrier, and now seems to be weaning completely, too. It seems like a lot for a little boy all at once; it certainly is a lot for me!

Do any of your nursing toddlers seem to be headed toward weaning during your pregnancy?

[tabitha]

no, that isnt happening here. but it sounds healthy and normal. it isnt how my kids have approached lessened supply and milk change, but i have heard of it before.

my only advice is to be completely flexible for everything to change back. i really believe that the best way we can support weaning kids (whether from the breast, diapers, or anything else) is to be there no matter what they decide to do. when my oldest was 4 i thought he weaned, but he started back up. when my dd was out of diapers she suddenly started 'needing' them again and we waited it out, eventually she gave them back up. little baby steps, forward and back.

weaning is hard, and i am no sage, i have only endured one weaning (my oldest, who weaned at 5). but i found i feel better and better about it. he is almost 6! he doesnt seem to have mourned it at all.

[4Marmalade]

I nursed my ds through my pregnancy with dd and he never really slowed down at all. He was a big time comfort nurser. He went on to tandem nurse with dd for 4 months and we gently encouraged him to give up that last nursing right before he turned 3.

I was planning on letting dd nurse through this pregnancy and tandem nurse as well but after finding out I was pregnant with twins and doing some research we thought it would be better to wean her altogether. She was pretty easy to persuade, thank goodness.

I think what's happening with your ds is pretty normal and natural. He may decide to nurse again once the baby arrives. I know my ds went from nursing 1-2 times/day to nursing as much as the newborn.

[mrs rockstar]

My 17 month old is down to once or twice a day (her choice, I don't restrict either except at night). I'm not too worried about full on weaning though as her big sister did the same thing when I was pregnant at the same age, she actually started skipping days all over the place when my second daughter was born and my milk came in, she picked it right back up. So. Maybe he's weaning or maybe he'll pick it back up. Either way, 30 months is awesome.

[Red Sonja]

Not yet, though they've both cut back a little bit. Last time DS started nursing more once my milk changed over to colostrum. Sometimes DS will go a day or so without nursing, but he's 3.5 and is probably close to weaning soon anyway. DD is 18 months and doesn't seem to be anywhere close to weaning yet.

[samuelsmom]

Yep, my dd is showing the weaning signs too, and she's about the same age as your ds (29months). She started sleeping through the night about a month ago (thank goodness!) and doesn't ask to nurse much at all any more--once or twice a day, when she was still nursing 6-8 times when I got pregnant. The other night, I was taking her upstairs to go to bed and she said, "I don't need nanas upstaris." I said, "you just want to lay down on your bed, then?" "Yes." So that's what she did--that's the first time she didn't nurse to sleep or at least before falling asleep. I'm pretty relieved actually about the whole thing, because it doesn't seem to be bothering her at all. She's basically following the same exact pattern her brother did when I was pg with her...slow, gentle, and easy weaning for both of us (well, it's sad, of course, to see her growing up so fast).

[sunnymw]

I'd be willing to bet that some of those "grown up" things will go back to "normal" when the new baby comes if only for a short while. One of the Sears books talks about how toddlers start to learn independence, and it's a two-steps-forward-one-step-back kind of thing... they chart the new territory, then when they get a little unsure, they come back for a period of closeness again. As long as you follow his lead he'll be just fine in letting you know just what he needs.

DS (16 months) has actually been nursing less during the day, but asking for it a ton in the evening... 4-5 times or more. His entire nursing routine has changed. What used to be 4-5 times at night and then 5-6 shorter sessions spread out evenly throughout the day has become just one long session in the morning, a ton of shorter sessions in the evening, and MAYBE one in the afternoon if he's really fussy. My only concern is that he's getting enough, because he's only getting BM and water right now, no milk supplements at all.

[Emily12581]

My almost 4 year old completely weaned herself about a month ago. It was very much like yours. I offered, she said she'd rather read stories with daddy to go to sleep. She'd ask off and on, and I assume my supply decreased dramatically becaus she'd say they wee empty and she didn't want it anymore. Finally she just stopped obsessing about nursing and hasn't even mentioned it at all for over a month now. I never denied her, no tonce. I feel this is the way it should have been and we are both satisfied..no tears

[~Megan~]

Sounds exactly like dd. She weaned really easily and went to her own bed of her own accord during pregnancy.

I so wish things would be that easy with ds. He is not taking the limited nusing well. He wasn't nursing all that much when I got pregnant, 2-3 times a day, but now he asks all day and night long. It is extremely painful. I often feel like I'm going to vomit.

I know dh would like me to wean him because he is as annoyed as I am by the constant, "I want nurni, I want nurni...." all the time plus I know it bothers dh when I'm yelping as ds latches on. Its actually affecting all our sleep (except dd!) as he wakes up all night long.

I'm so close to cold turkey weaning and I'm a frickin LLL leader!

I love, love, love my little boy but his behavior while nursing is killing me. Its ruining our relationship because he gets so mean when he wants to nurse. He's hitting and kicking us all, whining all the time.

If you've got advice for me I'll take it!

[yamilee21]

Very interesting to read the replies. I am glad to know that there are others with similar stories.

[wryknowlicious]

When I got pregnant it was the month that Eloisa turned 2. She was nursing about 10 times in 24 hrs still.

Once I got really sick she noticably cut back diring the day on her own but was still going 3-4 times at night.

I had no plans to introduce weaning measures, but by mid january I was out of milk and even the 2 -3 times a day she was asking to nurse HURT. So I refused for 2 days and she was ok with it.

Now it's been 3 weeks since she's nursed. Occasioanly she wants to see my boob or smell it. But she hasn;t latched on.

[Linzie2]

Gosh, my DD is so young!! She's 20 months and at this point is nursing every other day or so!!!!!! I guess I feel OK with it b/c it has not been any big deal to her. Nursing has not been painful for me during pregnancy, but my breasts have definitely become more sensitive: Like in a good way. I don't want to sound like a creep......I don't like the feeling of DD nursing, I just sit there and squirm the whole time b/c it just feels wrong . I mean, I don't buy into the whole "breasts are sexual objects" but I can't help how I feel!!!!

So anyway, I've not refused her at all, but limited her I guess. If she's coming on and off, she knows that's the end. Sometimes I feel guilty for getting pg so early

[Ligeia]

That sounds a lot more pleasant and natural than what happened to us when I got pregnant! My milk supply very suddenly dropped and I went from having plenty to nearly nothing. I could barely express anything, let alone feed my 18 mo dd. She got to where she would try to nurse but nothing was coming out so she would just keep trying and scream and cry herself to sleep. It was miserable so we weaned her. She actually got over wanting to nurse within days which I thought was very quick! I guess it just became a bad experience for her. Dh tried to take over putting her to sleep and some of the comforting that only I could do before but she still needs me for those things. I feel better about it since we still have those special moments just like we had nursing but I would have liked to nurse her as long as she'd liked.