Postpartum Rage

[katrinak]

Hi everyone, I am relatively new here, but I am 22 and have 3 babies under three years old (no multiples). I have been married for 37 months and pregnant for about 30 months of that. I have been pregnant or breastfeedign for all of it. My husband and I are going to divorce and I think he is going to try to say I have borderline personality disorder. He only knew me for 10 months prior to our marriage and we dated for only 5 (unplanned pregnancy) My symptoms do mimic those of borderline personality disorder, but I am not impulsive or self mutilating. I have issues with rage and controlling my emotions. I do fear abondonment, however I feel all of these symptoms are a natural response to my hormonal state and do not think it is BPD. BPD is the kiss of death in a custody battle and I need to try to prove that my seemingly BPD related behavior is actually related to postpartum/prenatal hormonal fluctuations. I need resources like books titles, hotlines, any good therapist in the St. Louis MO area. My husband has been abusive and at times so have I to him, however, I am looking for help and he won't. I do not want my husband to gain custody of our children, because I feel it s best that we have joint custody, being a child of divorce myself. PLEASE help, I don't know how long I have to get this together.

[~Heyokha~]

I have no suggestions but I wanted to give your thread a bump...hopefully someone else will respond.

Can you get a professional eval?

[katrinak]

Originally Posted by indigo515

I have no suggestions but I wanted to give your thread a bump...hopefully someone else will respond.

Can you get a professional eval?

I am going to see my counselor tonight. I have also made an appointment with the marriage counselor my FIL reccomended when my husband and I got married. My FIL is a LCMS minister and he performed our wedding ceremony, but felt he was too biased to provide pre/marrital counseling. He referred us to another pastor who is a certified counselor also. I am not really that religous, but I figure that my husband's family would trust this guy more than they would my own counselor.

[Surfacing]

For me pp rage was linked with untreated anxiety and/or depression. I'm thinking a psychiatrist would be the one qualified to determine if you have BPD or what. Are you seeing one? Have you seen one in the past?

[Mindy82]

(((katrinak))) Girl, I am so sorry u are going through this. I'm sorry I have no advice, I'm not married and have no children yet.

I just wanted to say, that I really hope your husband finds it in his heart to keep this amicable so it will be as easy on the children as possible. With the right counseling there are ways you can remain friends, and always put your children before anything else. Plead with him, I'm sure he knows how much you love your babies. Tell him how much it means to you that they have both of you growing up. I hope he comes around. Please let us know how it goes.

Mindy

[neveryoumindthere]

My postpartum rage was related to postpartum thyroiditis. Have you had your thyroid checked?
Hope things go smoothly as possible for you *hugs*

[leewd]

katrinak - Wow! That's a lot to be dealing with at such a young age.

I would suggest cross-posting in the Mental Health subforum. I've seen discussions about BPD though I don't know anything about it.

You can also post in Finding Your Tribe about finding a good counselor and Psychiatrist (for a proper diagnosis). I would suggest you find one who specializes in Pre-Natal and PP Mental Health issues. A good psychiatrist will test for everything - thyroid, vitamin deficiencies, the works.

You may also want to post in Single Parenting and see if you can find a mama who has gone through something similar.

Good Luck!
--LEE

[momoftwins41604]

You are not alone in this...I too have the same issues. My twins will be 4 in April, and I still have rage and strange emotional issues. I'm a very laid back gal and just normally let things go right over me and not worry, but anger is worse when it comes time for my period. But I do have it other times, it just seems worse the week before.

I'm currently on Wellbutrin XL and have been on it for almost 3 months and it seems to help a bit.

It could be pp related, hormonal, and just plain stress related. But I would definately check with your doctor. Anger and the emotional stuff is a sign of depression. Never thought in a million years I would be acting like this but here I am at the ripe age of 39 and my temper level is ridiciouls.

Sorry DH is not being supportive and you are having to deal with all of this with small children. I will keep you in my prayers. Keep us posted on what your doctor has to say!

Take care,
God Bless,
Julie D
Gulfport, MS

Proud, Blessed Momma to Ash & AJ