I was so shocked..I snapped at her...oops - Page 4

[allgirls]

Originally Posted by mammal_mama

I'm sorry you went through that!

It's a good thing the 13yo in the OP wasn't going through that.

No, I've gotten to know her a bit better since I first posted and they have no shortage of food there. In fact her mom just dropped my daughter off before their dinner, they are going out for dinner.

J.Jones...I'm so sorry it was like that for you. I can't imagine how horrible it would be to grow up without enough to eat

[BetsyNY]

I dunno...13 is still a child. She may have been wrong to do it, but children do make mistakes and we should treat them all with compassion....

[allgirls]

Originally Posted by BetsyNY

I dunno...13 is still a child. She may have been wrong to do it, but children do make mistakes and we should treat them all with compassion....

Compassion? I think this was more about respect than compassion

Compassion I have in spades, patience was what I was lacking in that moment..and the ability to sensor my response to her sneakiness. Maybe a lack of tact.

But as I said, I was just so shocked at the behaviour

[BetsyNY]

Again, she is the child, you are the adult. Obviously you do expect more from yourself or you wouldn't be posting about it here.

Shocked at the behavior...I guess. I can think of a LOT of things a 13-year-old could do that would be much more shocking...I'm not disagreeing that what she did was disrespectful and impolite, but I did want to throw out there that while a 13-year-old should know better, she's still a child and deserving of our compassion and patience.

[leerypolyp]

Eh. It falls into the realm of natural consequence, I think. Don't beat yourself up about it.

[allgirls]

Originally Posted by BetsyNY

Again, she is the child, you are the adult. Obviously you do expect more from yourself or you wouldn't be posting about it here.

Shocked at the behavior...I guess. I can think of a LOT of things a 13-year-old could do that would be much more shocking...I'm not disagreeing that what she did was disrespectful and impolite, but I did want to throw out there that while a 13-year-old should know better, she's still a child and deserving of our compassion and patience.

I think every person is deserving of compassion and patience no matter how they behave. Do you really think I don't already know that? Or are you talking to someone else?

yeah, she's the child, I am the adult, we are both human and I think I behaved in a completely understandable way. It's not like I berated and derided her for hours for this, I reacted to her actions.

I felt a bit bad after because I usually have a great deal of patience with kids. But I am not going to beat myself up for a simple little slip up.

It's all done now. I have meditated loving kindness towards her and all other living creatures and moved along with my life.

Cheers

[BetsyNY]

Originally Posted by allgirls

I think every person is deserving of compassion and patience no matter how they behave. Do you really think I don't already know that? Or are you talking to someone else?

I was responding to what you set forth. No need to get defensive. I think we all KNOW that, but that doesn't mean we remember it all of the time.

I don't think you need to beat yourself up about it, either. Just adding my .02 to the discussion. I thought that's what we were supposed to do here, no?