***April 2007 Mamas - It's March 2008!!!***

[ShyDaisi]

Hi, everyone!

I descended from lurkdom to start our March thread!

Here are a couple of then and now pics of Micah. I would love to see the same of everyone else's babes! (We definitely have a cute bunch here!)

2 weeks old...
22 weeks old (aka 5 months)...
45 weeks old (aka 10 1/2 months)...

Here is a link to a slidshow of all of the weeks so far....

: Happy March! :

Okay...back into hiding.....

[hanno]

Micah is just so adorable!


Welcome to March everyone : Spring and birthdays are just around the corner.

:A nerdy reminder about the exchange. Just email me with your address and preferences before the end of the month :

Originally Posted by doudat

Funny about feeding 3 months old and CIO. I was looking at old pictures of me and my parents, who were relatively hippy-ish, had me in my crib with a bottle of formula propped on pillows. At only 4 weeks old. Then I see a picture of me strapped to some weird seating contraption with a bowl of infant cereal next to me and my face covered with the stuff. At 6 weeks old. And they had these wooden playpens everywhere. My sister and I are outside in these wooden jails. Ugh.

We live and learn, don't we?
My mom defends these types of things so strongly and gets really frustrated when I do things differently. She sees it as a criticism of her love for me or something.

[mclisa]

Micah is a cutie!

[MaxiMom]

March! I'll have an 11 month old in 3 days!!!!

ShyDaisi, that is so great you put all those photos together. That's a great idea to send to the grandparents, too. I have to get the older photos off the other computer. Also, I have tons of framed photos of Max, but only one of Scarlet since we've gone all digital. I need to get some prints made.

Scarlet is now to the point where she really cries if I take something away from her. In fact, last night I tried to get my cell phone from her and she ran away! So funny! Although I'm sure it will get less funny as she continues to do this sort of thing.

Doudat and hanno - I specifically remember that sleeping with my parents was a definite no no and remember only one occasion when I was able to do so, when there was a terrible thunderstorm. My poor mom now has dementia and a while ago when I was talking to her friend about birthing at home she said, "I did that, too, didn't I?". Sorry, Mama, I was born in a hospital, bottle fed and slept in a crib. So it went and still goes for so many.

I saw two pregnant mamas at the library yesterday and was envious! Then I heard them talking about blood tests and ultrasounds - not so envious.

Boy, I'm blabby this morning!

[Queen of my Castle]

Romi has been screaming as well if I don't respond immediately. She's so clingy as well, she just follows me everywhere and won't let me do anything without being in my arms. And even in my arms she just grabs everything and makes housechores nearly impossible. Gah, I'm just a complainer today
Maybe I'm about to get af as well? I'm happy she hasn't showed up yet, but I have a feeling it'll be soon...
(sorry, posted by doudat obviously in Feb's thread)

How does that make you feel? Chad and his brothers have said jokingly that they're mad at their mom for circumsizing them and feeding them formula, of course they're not, but I think deep down they wish they had made different decisions. There are things I wish my mom had done differently, like nursed longer (than 6 months) but really, I'm quite proud of her for doing the things she did, especially without much support from family, or fuss from herself. She did bf us, had natural births and didn't circumsize my bro, but honestly I never wish we slept in their bed or didn't vax us, but then again- I grew up in a happy, healthy, stable, loving home with nothing to complain about. I do wish she'd show a little bit more real encouragement for some things that are obviously better- like extended nursing, and really, she doesn't care, but she trivializes things that really matter to me.

Originally Posted by hanno

Micah is just so adorable!

We live and learn, don't we?
My mom defends these types of things so strongly and gets really frustrated when I do things differently. She sees it as a criticism of her love for me or something.

Ya, same here. 'Well, I (emphasis on I) didn't do xxx...'
Anyway! Happy March!
Shydaisy, that's a great idea with the teddy- he sure has changed!

[4lilfarmers]

thanks maximom

[4lilfarmers]

ha-reposting b/c i'm sloooow

Quote:
Originally Posted by doudat View Post
Not much happening here. Same old. I'm jealous of you ladies with sleeping babies... Aaaah, sleep.

Romi has been screaming as well if I don't respond immediately. She's so clingy as well, she just follows me everywhere and won't let me do anything without being in my arms. And even in my arms she just grabs everything and makes housechores nearly impossible. Gah, I'm just a complainer today
Maybe I'm about to get af as well? I'm happy she hasn't showed up yet, but I have a feeling it'll be soon...

Oh, I went to drop off liam at daycare yesterday and one of the ladies that will have romi next month was asking me about her and asked me about bottles and stuff. She looked shocked when I told her Romi never had a bottle and she'll be going on milk and not formula. I told her I didn't breastfeed for a year to then give my baby a bottle filled with formula

i haven't been getting sleep either--for weeks, it seems. even when zenon does sleep, i'm having so much trouble sleeping. now he is sick and waking all.the.time.
sorry about the clinginess--that is so hard. kaylo was like that and it was so draining/frustrating!
that stinks about the interaction you had with your daycare person--i guess as a daycare provider, she probably sees no kids that go bottle-free..

Quote:
Originally Posted by doudat View Post
Funny about feeding 3 months old and CIO. I was looking at old pictures of me and my parents, who were relatively hippy-ish, had me in my crib with a bottle of formula propped on pillows. At only 4 weeks old. Then I see a picture of me strapped to some weird seating contraption with a bowl of infant cereal next to me and my face covered with the stuff. At 6 weeks old. And they had these wooden playpens everywhere. My sister and I are outside in these wooden jails. Ugh.

it was just what was told to them...my mom bf until we were 6 months but she didn't know anyone else that did that! and she never co-slept and fed us solids early too--but she was told to by our pedi and even her friends.

Quote:
Originally Posted by doudat View Post
Just read this on DS:
Government Concedes Vaccine-Autism Case in Federal Court

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/david-...-_b_88558.html
http://www.infowars.com/?p=504

thanks for the links.

[4lilfarmers]

Originally Posted by MaxiMom

March! I'll have an 11 month old in 3 days!!!!


I saw two pregnant mamas at the library yesterday and was envious! Then I heard them talking about blood tests and ultrasounds - not so envious.

Boy, I'm blabby this morning!

yikes! 11 months :

it's funny that you were envious of pg moms... i'm never envious of that! i'm maybe envious when i see a new little one but i'm not a huge fan of the pregnancy part.

Originally Posted by ShyDaisi

Hi, everyone!

I descended from lurkdom to start our March thread!

Here are a couple of then and now pics of Micah. I would love to see the same of everyone else's babes! (We definitely have a cute bunch here!)

2 weeks old...
22 weeks old (aka 5 months)...
45 weeks old (aka 10 1/2 months)...

Here is a link to a slidshow of all of the weeks so far....

: Happy March! :

Okay...back into hiding.....

nice to see you! what a cute guy! he's looking so old! oh and i'm very impressed by your weekly photos...i would never remember to take a photo every week. i try and remember to take one each month (on the 15th, his birthdate) and probably have only done it twice!

[doudat]

Micah is so sweet!!
11 months is scary, isn't it? A month away from a year...

Thanks Maximom, without your post I would've stayed on the other thread for a few days wondering where everyone was

As feeling resentment towards my family, well I kinda do. Cause I don't have a relationship with my mother and I always think that if she would have nurtured me, we would , you know? So nursing would've brought us together. As it was, she resented me for a c-section that she didn't want (ironically she wanted a natural birth). And seeing the pictures of me all alone in every picture breaks my heart. Plus I just remember stories of them letting me CIO cause I just cried all the time My whole family is disfunctional... My 2 brothers and my sister (who were all adopted, so obviously wanted) were dealt the same kind of weird rejection-parenting. Anyways, I just spilled my whole life in a paragraph, but my parents were very well educated, not mainstream, but still made really bad choices that affected everyone of us.

Hey, at least they didn't circumcise

[4lilfarmers]

Originally Posted by doudat

Micah is so sweet!!
11 months is scary, isn't it? A month away from a year...

Thanks Maximom, without your post I would've stayed on the other thread for a few days wondering where everyone was

As feeling resentment towards my family, well I kinda do. Cause I don't have a relationship with my mother and I always think that if she would have nurtured me, we would , you know? So nursing would've brought us together. As it was, she resented me for a c-section that she didn't want (ironically she wanted a natural birth). And seeing the pictures of me all alone in every picture breaks my heart. Plus I just remember stories of them letting me CIO cause I just cried all the time My whole family is disfunctional... My 2 brothers and my sister (who were all adopted, so obviously wanted) were dealt the same kind of weird rejection-parenting. Anyways, I just spilled my whole life in a paragraph, but my parents were very well educated, not mainstream, but still made really bad choices that affected everyone of us.

Hey, at least they didn't circumcise

wow, that's intense...and interesting too. that you can see now how APing may have changed your relationship with your mom. do you get along with your siblings well? does the fact that all of you had to deal with weird rejection-parenting bring you all closer?

[MaxiMom]

Originally Posted by doudat

Micah is so sweet!!
11 months is scary, isn't it? A month away from a year...

Thanks Maximom, without your post I would've stayed on the other thread for a few days wondering where everyone was

As feeling resentment towards my family, well I kinda do. Cause I don't have a relationship with my mother and I always think that if she would have nurtured me, we would , you know? So nursing would've brought us together. As it was, she resented me for a c-section that she didn't want (ironically she wanted a natural birth). And seeing the pictures of me all alone in every picture breaks my heart. Plus I just remember stories of them letting me CIO cause I just cried all the time My whole family is disfunctional... My 2 brothers and my sister (who were all adopted, so obviously wanted) were dealt the same kind of weird rejection-parenting. Anyways, I just spilled my whole life in a paragraph, but my parents were very well educated, not mainstream, but still made really bad choices that affected everyone of us.

Hey, at least they didn't circumcise

Yeah, I remember tantrums I had and cried and cried and all I wanted was my mom to come hold me and tell me it was ok. And after I had children I resented the fact that she left me with my sister (8 years older) to take care of me more often than not (my sister resents it, too, although she'd never admit it ). I became much more detached from my mom and angry at some things, when before, I defended everything she did. Feminism was not good for children and my mom's generation was the target of that - women were (still are) given the impression that they had something more important to do than take care of their families.

[doudat]

Originally Posted by krismarie

wow, that's intense...and interesting too. that you can see now how APing may have changed your relationship with your mom. do you get along with your siblings well? does the fact that all of you had to deal with weird rejection-parenting bring you all closer?

Nope, we're really far apart. When my parents split up, my mom sent me to live with my dad in Miami and then Trinidad. My siblings stayed here. So we only see one another about once a year.

Maximom: I know what you mean, I have so many memories of me trying to get some affection from my mother, and I was always "annoying" her. In retrospect, I'm sure she wasn't really the maternal type and should've just not have kids but it was the thing to do at that time in her life.

I so yearn for a loving, close-knit family. Nico's family is just his mom, so we don't have much of a network. It's sad how some of our families are so screwed up and we end up raising our children with this strong link that's missing

[Queen of my Castle]

Originally Posted by doudat

As feeling resentment towards my family, well I kinda do. Cause I don't have a relationship with my mother and I always think that if she would have nurtured me, we would , you know? So nursing would've brought us together. As it was, she resented me for a c-section that she didn't want (ironically she wanted a natural birth). And seeing the pictures of me all alone in every picture breaks my heart. Plus I just remember stories of them letting me CIO cause I just cried all the time My whole family is disfunctional... My 2 brothers and my sister (who were all adopted, so obviously wanted) were dealt the same kind of weird rejection-parenting. Anyways, I just spilled my whole life in a paragraph, but my parents were very well educated, not mainstream, but still made really bad choices that affected everyone of us.

Hey, at least they didn't circumcise

s Aw, mama, I don't even know what to say. Although- you can't reverse your childhood- at least you can make the changes you want to- and provide that unconditional love and attachment.
That's the one thing I wish my mom was different about, and it's affected me, especially- is that she really provided unconditional approval, even though I always knew she loved me, she can be judgemental. I want to parent just like my dad (minus the spanking), he was totally unconditional, never got angry at us, disciplined us so tenderly (yes, despite the method) and I knew he always, always loved me even when I was doing wrong.

Like Kris said though, they were just doing what they thought and were told was best. They knew no alternative. We have such an advantage with our access to information, and therefore exposure to various methods- so we have a choice of how we want to parent. Regardless, however, we're all going to screw up somewhere, because the fact is we're human, and we're fallible. I just wonder, because I tend to rely on information, if I would have the conviction to follow my gut on something if the information I had acess to told me otherwise. :dunno

Originally Posted by MaxiMom

Yeah, I remember tantrums I had and cried and cried and all I wanted was my mom to come hold me and tell me it was ok. And after I had children I resented the fact that she left me with my sister (8 years older) to take care of me more often than not (my sister resents it, too, although she'd never admit it ). I became much more detached from my mom and angry at some things, when before, I defended everything she did. Feminism was not good for children and my mom's generation was the target of that - women were (still are) given the impression that they had something more important to do than take care of their families.

Bolding mine, interesting, and you definately have a point. Although, the climate before feminism wasn't that helpful to them either. Your right though, it must have been a hard time. It's pretty difficult to imagine an ideal world even now, women are enslaved in an even different way now.
But lets not get on that!:

Ok. I had a busy day- friends over all afternoon.

[MaxiMom]

Originally Posted by Queen of my Castle

Like Kris said though, they were just doing what they thought and were told was best. They knew no alternative. We have such an advantage with our access to information, and therefore exposure to various methods- so we have a choice of how we want to parent. Regardless, however, we're all going to screw up somewhere, because the fact is we're human, and we're fallible. I just wonder, because I tend to rely on information, if I would have the conviction to follow my gut on something if the information I had acess to told me otherwise. :dunno

Good points.

Bolding mine, interesting, and you definately have a point. Although, the climate before feminism wasn't that helpful to them either. Your right though, it must have been a hard time. It's pretty difficult to imagine an ideal world even now, women are enslaved in an even different way now.
But lets not get on that!:

Imagining the ideal world is the best we can do.

Ok. I had a busy day- friends over all afternoon.

Fun for you! We saw some friends in the city last weekend and it was loads of fun - we rarely get out and about these days.

[ShyDaisi]

Originally Posted by hanno

We live and learn, don't we?
My mom defends these types of things so strongly and gets really frustrated when I do things differently. She sees it as a criticism of her love for me or something.

My mom did that a lot, too. I think the thing she fought me over the most was vaccinations. I think she felt that I was telling her that she had harmed me and my brother in some way. I originally began talking about it about 6 years ago, and we would have REALLY heated arguments about it. She has come around though -- She even sends ME articles she comes across that talk negatively about vaxes. (If you knew her your jaw would drop too ). Another thing she totally disagrees with is co-sleeping. She doesn't understand how people have child no. 2, 3, etc. and thinks that is "her" time and thinks it is going to be difficult to get him to sleep in his own bed. I told her that right now, Micah is the only man in my bed, and probably will be the only one for a while. Plus, I know no college student still sleeping in bed with their parents.

Originally Posted by MaxiMom

Doudat and hanno - I specifically remember that sleeping with my parents was a definite no no and remember only one occasion when I was able to do so, when there was a terrible thunderstorm. My poor mom now has dementia and a while ago when I was talking to her friend about birthing at home she said, "I did that, too, didn't I?". Sorry, Mama, I was born in a hospital, bottle fed and slept in a crib. So it went and still goes for so many.

There are a lot of AP things that I had no clue about until I stumbled upon this message board. I had planned on not circ, not vax, and natural childbirth (well, I had hoped anyway ), but had never thought about CDing, nor balking at cereal, nor delaying solids, nor self feeding, nor not CIO, nor co-sleeping, not even babywearing. I thought doing those non-AP things were what you were SUPPOSED to do. Of course my transition was softened by the shattering of the god complex for docs in my teens -- so I had no problems questioning docs...Of course, I could work on my confrontational skills.

Originally Posted by krismarie

yikes! 11 months :

it's funny that you were envious of pg moms... i'm never envious of that! i'm maybe envious when i see a new little one but i'm not a huge fan of the pregnancy part.

I am not envious of pg moms either, but I am not really envious of new moms either. : I think a lot of it stems from being a single mom with minimal help coupled with a bit of ppd. Micah is such a handful for me and I just don't think I could handle another without some help....

Originally Posted by krismarie

nice to see you! what a cute guy! he's looking so old! oh and i'm very impressed by your weekly photos...i would never remember to take a photo every week. i try and remember to take one each month (on the 15th, his birthdate) and probably have only done it twice!

Thanks! I have to admit that they are not always taken right on time, but pretty close -- usually within the week. I got the idea from my dad -- he mentioned it when Micah was 10 days old, thus why there is no '1 week' pic. Its funny how some pics there is a very noticable jump in his looks. I think he has definitely changed a lot.

Originally Posted by doudat

Maximom: I know what you mean, I have so many memories of me trying to get some affection from my mother, and I was always "annoying" her. In retrospect, I'm sure she wasn't really the maternal type and should've just not have kids but it was the thing to do at that time in her life.

I could have written that almost word for word. My mom even says that she wasn't cut out for having kids and that....well, a bunch of not nice stuff....On the upside though, our relationship has improved tremendously since getting pregnant with Micah.

Man I am feeling chatty, apparently...

On the side of things, I just wanted to share that I bled for over 9 weeks pp and THEN decides to waltz back at 18 weeks pp and has been regular ever since.....So, while I do slightly feel for those who are changing sides...I am definitely jealous ouf the -free time you have had....

Micah's ready for some :2bfbabe: so gotta go!

[rivkajean]

Progress is good.

4 days old
5 months old
10 months old and cool as a cucumber

Well... Savannah is losing it here... so as much as I wanna put in my two cents worth about the whole feminism thing, I won't. And it's not probably necessary. You guys already hit the nail on the head, IMO.
So many things, cultural, societal, monetary, etc... all get in the way of how we, in our hearts, know how raise our children -- and how children would be raised best overall -- and that's what we're fighting when we aren't sure if we're doing things "the right way." Wondering if we're bad or good for letting them cry for two minutes or ten minutes, wondering if we should call the doctor, wondering if we're doing it right since it's so different than what's around us (or how we were raised)...
So here's a toast to all of us, who are trying to listen to our hearts and provide the best we can for our babes. I'm feeling lately that it's a long haul, especially when it's the middle of winter. (boo! winter) At least we all have cute pictures to share, of cute babies!!! And a little encouragement from like minded ladies -- what would other generations have given to have what we have?!
**I think I'm feeling sentimental from looking at all those early baby pictures silly silly.

[mclisa]

Originally Posted by Queen of my Castle

Romi has been screaming as well if I don't respond immediately. She's so clingy as well, she just follows me everywhere and won't let me do anything without being in my arms. And even in my arms she just grabs everything and makes housechores nearly impossible. Gah, I'm just a complainer today
Maybe I'm about to get af as well? I'm happy she hasn't showed up yet, but I have a feeling it'll be soon...
(sorry, posted by doudat obviously in Feb's thread)

How does that make you feel? Chad and his brothers have said jokingly that they're mad at their mom for circumsizing them and feeding them formula, of course they're not, but I think deep down they wish they had made different decisions. There are things I wish my mom had done differently, like nursed longer (than 6 months) but really, I'm quite proud of her for doing the things she did, especially without much support from family, or fuss from herself. She did bf us, had natural births and didn't circumsize my bro, but honestly I never wish we slept in their bed or didn't vax us, but then again- I grew up in a happy, healthy, stable, loving home with nothing to complain about. I do wish she'd show a little bit more real encouragement for some things that are obviously better- like extended nursing, and really, she doesn't care, but she trivializes things that really matter to me.



Ya, same here. 'Well, I (emphasis on I) didn't do xxx...'
Anyway! Happy March!
Shydaisy, that's a great idea with the teddy- he sure has changed!

You know, I'm hoping we have enough wisdom (or memory) to be supportive of our daughters (or DIL's for some of you!). They will do different things too.

I'm sure we will all be on a board somewhere propping each other up as we talk about our grandkids and how they are being parented.

[4lilfarmers]

wow, you are all making such great points about mothering/parenting and the generational differences. you should hear my mil go off about feminism and what it did to the mothering "instinct". most women were told to basically turn it off or put it off and then try and juggle a "man's" roll and a "woman's" roll together. (or it's what she'd say) and i do agree with some of that. i think the idea that women can "have it all" (a career, family, home, etc) does affect something which in most cases is the family/kids. but i don't want to say that and offend people on here who do think they have all of those things successfully, i think it can happen.

one of you said something about the battles you had with being an AP parent. my mom wasn't AP at all but did stay home with us and is very maternal (naturally)... but she did express a lot of hesitation about co-sleeping, extended breast feeding, selected vax, you name it. as a new mom, i found it really hard to do what i felt was right when my mom (whom i very close to) was telling me not to. :

on another note--i'm sorry to hear that your mom has dementia, maximom--do you live near her/have to care for her much?

and doudat--that sounds so hard...no wonder you have no relationship with your mom--i'm sure the fact that she sent you to your dad must create some deep issues... dh and i want to be close to our families and have that network but then we choose to live far from them....makes it hard. we've developed a nice community of like-minded people (we call our vt family) and i think those families are just as important!

[4lilfarmers]

Originally Posted by rivkajean

So here's a toast to all of us, who are trying to listen to our hearts and provide the best we can for our babes. I'm feeling lately that it's a long haul, especially when it's the middle of winter. (boo! winter) At least we all have cute pictures to share, of cute babies!!! And a little encouragement from like minded ladies -- what would other generations have given to have what we have?!
**I think I'm feeling sentimental from looking at all those early baby pictures silly silly.

Originally Posted by mclisa

You know, I'm hoping we have enough wisdom (or memory) to be supportive of our daughters (or DIL's for some of you!). They will do different things too.

I'm sure we will all be on a board somewhere propping each other up as we talk about our grandkids and how they are being parented.

we will... (thanks for including dil)

[MaxiMom]

Originally Posted by rivkajean

Progress is good.

4 days old
5 months old
10 months old and cool as a cucumber

What a serene 4 day old picture!

Well... Savannah is losing it here... so as much as I wanna put in my two cents worth about the whole feminism thing, I won't. And it's not probably necessary. You guys already hit the nail on the head, IMO.
So many things, cultural, societal, monetary, etc... all get in the way of how we, in our hearts, know how raise our children -- and how children would be raised best overall -- and that's what we're fighting when we aren't sure if we're doing things "the right way." Wondering if we're bad or good for letting them cry for two minutes or ten minutes, wondering if we should call the doctor, wondering if we're doing it right since it's so different than what's around us (or how we were raised)...
So here's a toast to all of us, who are trying to listen to our hearts and provide the best we can for our babes. I'm feeling lately that it's a long haul, especially when it's the middle of winter. (boo! winter) At least we all have cute pictures to share, of cute babies!!! And a little encouragement from like minded ladies -- what would other generations have given to have what we have?!
**I think I'm feeling sentimental from looking at all those early baby pictures silly silly.

Thanks! Cheers!

Originally Posted by krismarie

wow, you are all making such great points about mothering/parenting and the generational differences. you should hear my mil go off about feminism and what it did to the mothering "instinct". most women were told to basically turn it off or put it off and then try and juggle a "man's" roll and a "woman's" roll together. (or it's what she'd say) and i do agree with some of that. i think the idea that women can "have it all" (a career, family, home, etc) does affect something which in most cases is the family/kids. but i don't want to say that and offend people on here who do think they have all of those things successfully, i think it can happen.

True.

one of you said something about the battles you had with being an AP parent. my mom wasn't AP at all but did stay home with us and is very maternal (naturally)... but she did express a lot of hesitation about co-sleeping, extended breast feeding, selected vax, you name it. as a new mom, i found it really hard to do what i felt was right when my mom (whom i very close to) was telling me not to. :

on another note--i'm sorry to hear that your mom has dementia, maximom--do you live near her/have to care for her much?

Thanks, Kris. She is back in Detroit in a care home. It's been difficult as my brother and sister have taken care of everything for her - moving her, battling with her illness and doctors, etc. while I've been so far away. I flew back every three months for the first two years of Max's life and did as much as I could, but bro and sis are still mad that I wasn't there to do more. When Max was born we thought we'd move back east to be closer to family, but that just wasn't going to work out, between way too much pressure from them as to when and finances, it was not in the cards. It has definitely caused a rift, but here I was, just starting a family in a new home and that was my priority. My siblings are alot older than me and lived there, so they had to take responsibility. If I was there and they were elsewhere, I would have taken it on. My parents have been divorced since I was three, so Dad is there to support bro and sis more than anything. And I left my snooty suburb of Detroit for a reason - I never fit in. It's nice to visit, but I'm always glad to be back.

and doudat--that sounds so hard...no wonder you have no relationship with your mom--i'm sure the fact that she sent you to your dad must create some deep issues... dh and i want to be close to our families and have that network but then we choose to live far from them....makes it hard. we've developed a nice community of like-minded people (we call our vt family) and i think those families are just as important!

And like you, we're building a different sort of family here. DH has no relationship with his mother and barely with a couple of his sisters. I agree it is hard having no help, but this is our circumstance and we have adapted to it. I'm very grateful that Max does have a relationship with my Dad and Stepmom, albiet long distance. He asks if it's the end of March yet every day - can't wait to go see them!

BTW - None of my family has visited me since our wedding, and they were reluctant to do that! :

Max and dh are gone for the day, hooray it's just me and Scarlet! What to do?!!