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March dating thread!!!

post #1 of 171
Thread Starter 
Hi all

Here we are, its March and so much has happened this year so far. I cannot wait to hear of the new things that are in store.

I am feeling optimistic, but I hesitate to share right now, mostly because I am a bit superstitious that by letting all of the energy out of the situation will 'jinx' it


I will just say that it is a new guy, and there are many 'coincidences' present. I have no desire to talk to anyone else. I will update as things progress, just not yet

I long to hear your new updates.
post #2 of 171
I just wanted to ....you've got the March thread up and I'm barely out of bed on the 1st!!! (lol)

Have fun with your coincidental new man!
post #3 of 171
After 5 years of being single and celibate, I'm finally ready to start dating again! I know I haven't been here for a long time, but I'm hoping I'll have more time to be online and make visit with you lovely ladies!

So, I decided to try some online dating to get some practice in, and perhaps even meet a nice man. I'm going out to brunch with a guy I haven't met yet on Wed. He seems like a nice guy, and we've spoken on the phone a couple of times.

Since finding a babysitter just to go out on a date is big pain, I had been hoping I'd find someone with flexible work hours... and sure enough he has Wed. off! yay! So I can meet him while my daughter is in school.

I'll update next week, wish me luck!
post #4 of 171
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MsChatsAlot View Post
I just wanted to ....you've got the March thread up and I'm barely out of bed on the 1st!!! (lol)
post #5 of 171
I am new here (I may have intro'ed myself a couple of years ago, then not posted much), and haven't posted my long convoluted story and intro, yet. But I have started dating an old friend after not dating or even considering dating for almost 4 years.

It's interesting and hard, trying to relearn how all this works.
post #6 of 171
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MamaLeslie View Post
I am new here (I may have intro'ed myself a couple of years ago, then not posted much), and haven't posted my long convoluted story and intro, yet. But I have started dating an old friend after not dating or even considering dating for almost 4 years.

It's interesting and hard, trying to relearn how all this works.

Welcome Leslie
post #7 of 171
Thread Starter 
post #8 of 171
i've been missing around these parts but not for lack of dating. d and i have been dating for 4.5 months now. i put closet organizers in my closet a few weeks ago and half of it is taken up by his clothes. my pillows always smell like him, his dirty laundry is mixed with ours, he buys groceries for our household. right now i have the best of single-momdom and the best of couplehood. a couple nights a week it's just me and the kids for snuggles and playing. the rest of the week we are a family of four (or five on weekends when he has his son). i'm getting to be a single mom, a bonus mom, a girlfriend, a partner and a part of a family. i'm trying to keep in focus the things i require out of a person/relationship right now. d is good to me and my children and we like each other's company. for now, that's enough.
post #9 of 171
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Still_Snarky View Post
i've been missing around these parts but not for lack of dating. d and i have been dating for 4.5 months now. i put closet organizers in my closet a few weeks ago and half of it is taken up by his clothes. my pillows always smell like him, his dirty laundry is mixed with ours, he buys groceries for our household. right now i have the best of single-momdom and the best of couplehood. a couple nights a week it's just me and the kids for snuggles and playing. the rest of the week we are a family of four (or five on weekends when he has his son). i'm getting to be a single mom, a bonus mom, a girlfriend, a partner and a part of a family. i'm trying to keep in focus the things i require out of a person/relationship right now. d is good to me and my children and we like each other's company. for now, that's enough.
that's great Celeste, just keep that positive attitude and things will continue to go your way. I think appreciating it all is the key. There are benefits in single mom-hood, if I were part of a partnership I am sure part of me would miss that alone time that I so cherish (which is why I am going to need a partner who gives me space as well as closeness)
post #10 of 171
My drummer made a pass at me. I think. It was the "California hug" (departure version), with an extra caress to the nape of my neck. It's not that I mind, per se. I like him. But, I just finally walked away from this other guy who was driving me absolutely nutso.
Plus, we have a show next week (the first in almost a year).
My friend says that she's not surprised that the drummer made a pass. I was, at least, in the moment. I was like, "uh, see you next week". Ack.
My neighbor also made a pass at me on Friday night. She's too young.
Ack.
Suddenly, I guess I have the "available" sign on.
I'm not really over the nutso guy. I'm never ready to date, I think.
post #11 of 171
I ended things with the guy I've been seeing for the past month and a half - last night. He's younger and nowhere near ready for kids and has no understanding or interest in the "Mom" part of my life. At least, I think that's how he feels. When I mentioned it, he didn't disagree. The thing is, he didn't work with my life, rather I had to try to work him in around it. It was getting to be too much. We'd go all week without seeing each other, because dd only goes to her father's on Saturdays. I would ask him to meet us at the park or come by the house sometime and he seemed intimidated. Granted, I am not looking to get some guy all involved in dd's life, but when I am with her all week long, it would be nice if the guy I was seeing could come for a picnic at the park sometime. Am I wrong? I'm feeling really down about it right now. He is an amazing person, really. I feel like we are victims to circumstance.

I think I need to meet a guy who has kids himself. There's a certain level of understanding there that I need.
post #12 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by LankyLizards View Post
I think I need to meet a guy who has kids himself. There's a certain level of understanding there that I need.
IMHO, it's less about whether the guy has kids, and more about whether the guy is into you and accepts that you do have kids. Even guys who have kids, unless they have custody, may still have trouble understanding how much kids impact your life. But a guy who puts you first will work with you, regardless.
post #13 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharondio View Post
IMHO, it's less about whether the guy has kids, and more about whether the guy is into you and accepts that you do have kids. Even guys who have kids, unless they have custody, may still have trouble understanding how much kids impact your life. But a guy who puts you first will work with you, regardless.
:

I have never dated a man with a child(ren) and I have never wanted to either.

The 4-5 childless men I have dated since my divorce, including the guy I am currently dating, have been absolutely wonderful in accepting ds and my role as a mother. They have all been very accomodating and understanding about my single mama life.

It just depends on the individual.
post #14 of 171
Hmmm, I love dating a man with a child. So much more understanding there and so much more in common. But I dated a guy without a kid for four months and he loved my ds and was so good to both of us, so I don't think it really matters.

Still dating S. It has been over 6 months now. Everything is great. Finally found someone that is open, honest, loving, caring, sweet, good to me and ds, and actually loves me for who I am, whatever that happens to be in the moment.

Exdh made a pass at me after we finished our divorce papers. I told him "You know I would never cheat on S" and he said "It's not cheating if he doesn't know about it." Yes, this coming from the man who cheated on me more than once. Asshole.

So, overall, just really happy with things. I have been trying to post in the Blended Family forums now, since that is more of what we are now, but I didn't feel totally welcome there since it hasonly been 6 months. So now I am somewhere in limbo between dating and being a blended family. Honestly, the dating is over. This is the guy I am going to marry, I love his son, he loves mine. Either way, though, things are so good
post #15 of 171
Thread Starter 
I am about to burst I want to tell you guys SO BAD!!! I will spill it after friday
post #16 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sharondio View Post
IMHO, it's less about whether the guy has kids, and more about whether the guy is into you and accepts that you do have kids. Even guys who have kids, unless they have custody, may still have trouble understanding how much kids impact your life. But a guy who puts you first will work with you, regardless.
Absolutely! I'm dating a man w/o kids right now, but he seems almost to have more appreciation and respect for all the work I do as a single mom than ds's dad does. He understands that ds comes first and he works with that. I thought maybe I'd need to meet a man with kids, too, but it absolutely does turn out to have more to do with the person, and how into/supportive of you, he is.
post #17 of 171
Nothing too exciting at this point in March. The man I am building a relationship with is in London right now, so I haven't spoken to him in 4 days. He comes back to the US tomarrow. I did write a poem about the whole internet dating thing. Anyone want to hear it? It's a farse on internet dating. Just for fun.
post #18 of 171
James and I are still together. He's in Florida for 18days for the military. I'm trying not to complain, since he didn't end up having to go to Afghanistan, but I do miss him.

Easter dinner will probably be with James at his grandparents house, sans his kids or mine. exDp will have my ds, and James' exwife will have his boys.

Call for advice:

His friend is doing an unpaid internship in NYC and has nowhere to stay, so is going to crash at James' place for 8 weeks. Problem is that she's...well, a she. They have no romantic or sexual history, he swears. And I've seen emails and myspace messages back and forth, and they're all very benign. But I'm still afraid that them spending so much time together is gonna do something.

Another issue I have is that James' apartment is a small one bedroom. She's going to be sleeping on the couch. I've been staying with family while I look for a new apartment (my other lease ended, I haven't found a new place yet), and it's driving me freaking NUTS! James' place was my escape...I sleep there 2-3 days a week, shower there, walk around in a towel, that kind of thing. Now she's going to be there EVERY night. And she doesn't have a car, so when she's not interning, she'll be there. We can't even sit on the couch and watch tv anymore, since it'll be her bed.

I know I sound like a brat, but it just kind of stinks. He doesn't even know her super-well. He just wants to help her out (she has no where else to go--she's from SC, and needs this internship to break into her career), and I think she's going to pitch in for rent a little, which would help him out too.

JYOTSNA-I'd love to hear your poem!
post #19 of 171
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jyotsna View Post
Nothing too exciting at this point in March. The man I am building a relationship with is in London right now, so I haven't spoken to him in 4 days. He comes back to the US tomarrow. I did write a poem about the whole internet dating thing. Anyone want to hear it? It's a farse on internet dating. Just for fun.
Let's have it
post #20 of 171

Internet Lover (poem)

Okay mamas, you asked. This is a total farse on the internet dating scene, but for those who have taken part, I thought you might enjoy this.


Email Lover
-------------
Love your profile, it's so great,
email me for an online date.
What's the weather in your town,
was that a sideways smile,
or was it a frown?

Let's stay in touch, and see how we click.
If things look bad, I've got a business trip.

I love travel, knitting and hobbies,
are you involved in politics, did you hear
about that lobby?

Internet dating, it's fun
and it's new.
If you get this email,
I'd like to meet you!

When I'm with you, we'll go out in a carriage,
if you like me alot, I'll ask your hand in marriage.

Internet dating it's fun and it's new.
Don't tell me lies, and I'll be true to you.

Jyotsna
(I had to write something after 10 men have
contacted me and 1/2 already had our marriage
planned out!!! Good greif!)
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