Would you leave 11-yr-old to babysit? - Page 5

[Mom2Joseph]

I have not read any replies - the answer is NO.

[bright-midnight]

No, I don't think so. I would maybe leave a responsible 11 year old by him/herself for a few minutes to run to the store or something like that, but I would not leave them alone with a baby.

[trinity6232000]

Originally Posted by trinity6232000

but I also wouldn't hold it against the parents who are comfortable with this situation.

Originally Posted by Sharlla

Well as long as it's legal. In some states leaving children at home alone is not legal.

I still wouldn't hold it against the parents who are comfortable with this situation. The OP didn't ask if she should allow her dd to be watched by this babysitter. She made it clear she wasn't comfortable, that's fine. Like I said I don't think any parent should put their child into a situation that they aren't comfortable with. I feel one of the most important skills we have as parents is to listen to our inner voice.

How does the legality of the situation have anything to do with making a moral judgement about their baby-sitting choices?

[Ironica]

Originally Posted by Periwinkle

I really hope that by the time my children reach age 11 they are MORE than capable of babysitting. Honestly - and I'm not trying to start anything I am just literally stating dh's and my sincere belief on this - I would consider it a failure on my part if my almost adolescent child were incapable of caring for younger children.

Hehe... and I feel kinda the opposite... that if my child *is* that "mature" by age 11, I did something wrong! ;-)

[wednesday]

I babysat a very young infant a couple times at age 12. I remember not really knowing what to do but kind of figuring it out anyway. I would think it would be different with an 11-year-old sibling. Who has presumably already helped give the baby bottles and changed diapers on many occasions. So honestly, if the 11-year-old were okay with it and mature/responsible, and the 10-month-old didn't have any kind of unusual or challenging issues, I can see it being okay *for their family*. Would I leave my 4-year-old there too, NO.

[jeca]

Originally Posted by MomInFlux

I do not think that I would be comfortable with an eleven year old (any eleven year old) babysitting an infant. An eleven year old staying home alone? OK. But responsible for a baby? Nope.

:

[2 in August]

I wouldn't. Like other have said, maybe with a 5 or 6 yo but not with a baby. I've got a 6yo though and I wouldn't leave her with an 11yo. Then again she's only ever been with my parents, my ils a couple times and a couple friends of mine that have kids her age.

[Katana]

Originally Posted by Periwinkle

I really hope that by the time my children reach age 11 they are MORE than capable of babysitting. Honestly - and I'm not trying to start anything I am just literally stating dh's and my sincere belief on this - I would consider it a failure on my part if my almost adolescent child were incapable of caring for younger children.

I feel this way too.

I was raised to be responsible, and prepared for various hypothetical emergencies, from a young age. My dad thought it was very important to prepare us for the uncertainties of life. So many times, I've been very thankful for that.

Dh was raised in a similar way.

It's been very important to us to prepare the kids in the same way. So far, I can't think of any time that it's been a disservice to them.

[Pyrodjm]

The summer I turned 12, I was often left with my 9 year old brother and 5 year-old sister. Both of my parents worked at that time. Our grandmother lived 4 houses down from us on the same street, though.

We had very strict rules that my parents set for when they wee not home. No leaving the block. No one but the three of us allowed in the house. No going into houses of neighbors. We were allowed to play outside in the open and if we wanted to go to the store we had to convince and older relative (cousin or aunt) to accompany us. There were many more. My mother called at least 3 times a day and we called both of our parents often. We never had any accidents or problems, but I was mature for my age and my brother and sister were raised to mind me when no parents were around.

I would not have a problem leaving a mature 11 year-old with a younger sibling but the youngest I would go would be 4. I would not feel comfortable leaving an infant with someone so young.

[saimeiyu]

a big yeah that! to periwinkle and katana...
I can't see how an 11 year old who is level-headed and responsible would be a failing. I consider that a worthy accomplishment.
Of course, then again, I'm not a really big fan of the "X can't handle X because they're only X years old." I think that's a silly way to make judgements about anything and anyone. People are all different, and people all mature differently. I'm just not a big fan in general of legal ages to do X, like drink alcohol, or drive, or babysit, or whatever.

Also I think it's something to consider that kids have a tendency to fulfil expectations. If I constantly insinuate to my child that I don't trust them because they're X years old, I'm telling them that I don't expect them to be responsible, and it takes that much longer for them to really learn responsibility.

[TattooedMommy]

Nope, no way no how. That is just too young.

[allgirls]

At 11 I would have left either of my older children with either one of their younger siblings but only under certain conditions.

We would be at a local restaurant down the road(5 minute walk)
There would be a direct phone connection
It would be for less than 2 hours

Knowing my children as I do..under these conditions I would be quite comfortable.

We left my 7 month old with her older sisters and went to dinner once. The older sisters were 10 and 13. We were about a 20 minute drive away. I was nervous about it through out the whole meal but there was 2 of them and one baby and cell phone connection.

I never went that far away again. It was outside of my comfort zone. So dh and I never went out again until this valentines day when we left the kids with my almost 14 year old and her friend. The girls are now 2 and 4.5. We were not far away and it was only 2 hours. I was much more comfortable this time. Also my friend who is a nurse was home and available if they needed something.

Both my older girls got their babysitters licence at 11 through St. John's ambulance.

[eckmannl]

I haven't read all of the replies but I would say no. I have been babysitting since I was 11 or 12 (I can't remember which) and I had taken the red cross babysitting course, etc. I regularly babysat a 7ish yr old girl and would occasionally be asked to babysit her and her infant brother for an entire evening, such as 4pm to 10, 11, or so. I had to cook dinner and everything. I remember the mom telling me the baby's cereal was in the cupboard... nothing about how to mix it or anything like that. I also remember being scared out of my mind every time I had to babysit that baby because I couldn't ever seem to get him to stop crying. I would never refuse to babysit for them though.
On the other hand, at the very same time, I was also babysitting fairly regularly (every few weeks) for another family. Both of these houses were no more than 5-6 houses away from my own where I could call my mom at any time. This other family consisted of three kids, a toddler (I started around his first birthday and we moved when he was almost 3) and two older kids (about 3 and 5 when I started.) I had absolutely no problems with these kids at all. Things almost always went smoothly and I don't ever remember panicking about anything like I did with the other baby every time. That family also left money for pizza or had food ready so I wasn't responsible for cooking or anything, just watching the kids. So, I guess it depends on the situation, but I'd err on the side of caution.

[sarahbay]

I think that a lot of people who are answering NO WAY right off the bat, haven't really been around any mature 11 yr olds, or haven't actually babysat lil ones themselves.

I babysat at that age with no problems.

My 11 year old daughter is more mature now at 11 than many 17 year olds I have met.

Who cares if she can't drive, like a 16 year old would drive a baby to the hospital?? No they'd call 911 like anyone else would, and call me to come home if it wasn't an emergency.

Personally I think 12-14 is the perfect babysitting age, provided the child is mature and can think on their feet, is very in tune with babies, and has experience with this baby and other babies.

16-18 year olds rifle through all your stuff, sit on the phone the whole time they are there and let the kids space out in front of the tv instead of playing with them, and invite their boyfriend over.

Adolescents actually play with kids/babies.

I don't know if I'd let the kid watch MY baby at 10 mo though, but that's only because he is the most colicky, ornery little dude on the planet. I honestly don't know who would be able to watch him. He is a lot of work for even me and my hubby, and we know all the tricks!

[RachelSerena]

I used to do it. But, I was a very mature, responsible child and very much had the child's safety in mind at all times.

In both cases tho, the parent was minute's away.

[Marsupialmom]

There are several things at play...........

In some cases parent have to do what they have to do to. But going out on date night while 11 year old babysitts isn't that ok.

[applejuice]

I was a mature eleven year old who was in charge of five younger siblings.

But I would never do that to any other eleven year old, no matter how mature they were. It is simply not fair to them to put that much responsibility on their young shoulders.

[NatureMama3]

My sister had me babysit her kids starting at age 11 (infant).

The only problems I had were due to their vicious german shepherd.

that said, no WAY I'd let an 11 year old watch an infant or even toddler of mine. Not even my own kids at 11.

[A&A]

WAY too young. (And to respond to SarahBay, yes, I know mature 11 year-olds. The answer is still NO WAY!!!)

[bjorker]

Originally Posted by Viola

I was a responsible child who in some ways was mature for her age in comparison to my siblings and friends, but the emotional maturity just wasn't there, I guess, because I had a lot nervousness at night or if I were in an isolated place. I'd worry that even though she seemed capable and could handle it, that I would be putting stress on her that might not be evident at first.

That's exactly one of my points that I started to write in my response earlier, but deleted before I posted it because I couldn't make it all come out right.

I was an extremely responsible and capable child, but I wish that my parents didn't leave me alone for a number of hours around that age (and I wasn't even babysitting-- but I did have a LOT of responsibilities). A short amount of time would have probably been fine, but other than that it was NOT a good thing for me emotionally. And that would not have been an easy thing to tell. I worry about what this is doing to that 11-year old. I mean - exactly what you said.