post #61 of 141
3/5/08 at 8:44pm
I think your OP on this thread was fine, Phantaja, and it bums me out that you came here with an attitude of truly trying to understand, and yet you get flamed.
People, can we help someone understand a touchy topic without making them feel like crap? I hate it when we have a nerve touched and then get kind of condescending and stuff.... (and I know I've been guilty of this so I'm not being all high and mighty).
The OP seems to genuinely want to understand better, so can we do this in a decent way?
Who has done this? I see people getting passionate about something they feel strongly about, but I honestly don't see flaming. And I don't see anyone trying to make anyone else feel like crap.
How do you propose we be decent? I'm asking sincerely, because I've seen nothing here that hasn't qualified as such.
Ruthla, I take everything you say in like a sponge (b/c I like your advice) but I'm not pulling them out of school for tears. There are 3 of them and this is a good school district. Call it tough love or a tough mama, but I think he can either adapt now or later. If that is bad, then fine. I didn't cry in class, and I did have a whole horse cart load of stuff to fuss over by the time I was his age...maybe that is why I just sigh and don't know what to do w/him. Sometimes I'd like to pull him aside and say, hey-by your age I was smacked around and was on dad #3, but I'd never do that to him. But sometimes I DO....ohhhhh boyyyyy, DO I just want to say, buck up lil camper. Grow a set. c'mon. I'd do that if he was a girl, too.
sooooo, now you know where I'm coming from when I say I don't know how to deal w/a kid who is a bit tearful b/c he's too emotional when there is absolutely nothing wrong w/family life or school life and he gets great grades, but he sometimes feels the weight of the world on his shoulders. WHAT do I do???
Sure, this post ain't pc, but I never claimed to be as such. I do try to be nice, however.
My 10 year ols is incredibly senstive to remarks from people, he's the outcast 99% of the time He comes home crying a lot, even when playing with friends. I just hug him, tell him I hope he's feeling better soon and ask if there's anything I can do. Most of the time, it's all he needs. He's homeschooled for this and many other reasons though (it was much worse when he was in school).
My daughter has a pair of "boy" briefs. I wouldn't be surprised if my boy ends up with panties.
I know lots of older boys and men who wear make up. Both my kids play with make up and nail polish.
I don't agree with "sitting like a lady."
My girls wears pink and blue and every colour. So does my boy. So does every male and female adult I know.
Oh yeah and my boy has long hair.
I have no problem with gender differences. Having a son and a daughter, however, have shown me that there are very few, legitimate differences. In fact, my daughter is more stereotypically like a boy and my son is more stereotypically like a girl.
None of what you listed is specifically girl or boy. I will not limit my children in any way.