|Of course we don't care when they are toddlers. If they are still wearing fairy wings and whatnot as 9-10 yo's...well, I haven't heard too much from any of those moms.
It may be the region I live in (pretty far over on the so called "hippy dippy" scale) but I know several boys (not toddlers) with long hair, tunics that are not that far from skirts, and nail polish. And several girls who have buzz cut hair and dirt on their hands. I've actually learned not to comment on "your little girl/your little boy" with mamas I don't know simply because the line here is very very blurry. Even in school aged kiddos. And I attended college with many many people (gay straight bi questioning etc) who didn't fit into a neat and tidy "gender category". Right down to the fairy wings in some cases.
I think it just kind of depends on where you live and how strongly you feel the need to support a child's individuality vs how far you're willing to bend to protect your child (and by extension yourself) from gender discrimination. (and I mean that in a good way... I certainly sympathize with and understand parents who feel the need to change who their child is in order to protect them).
And on a related note, does anyone find it interesting that so many of the comments in this thread refer to gendered behavior in male children rather than female? As if "gender male" comes about through things you don't
do (don't cry, don't decorate the body, don't play with dolls) while "gender female" comes about through things you do
do (do decorate the body, do sit with legs together, etc).