what do you feed your picky kids?

[gentlemango]

I have a very skinny, pale 5yo son. We are a recovering vegan family. He has many typical pickiness issues, like he only wants to eat carbs, will only drink chocolate milk, things like that. Hiding food a la deceptive dinners doesn't work.

I take the approach of don't have junk in the house, only offer healthy real food, let him decide what and how much to eat. The problem with that is that he's soooo skinny, and our pedi is worried.

Help?

[Purple Sage]

When you say carbs, do you mean junk food? I firmly believe that not all carbs are equal, and I have no problem with my kids eating lots and lots of good carbs. We make homemade whole grain quick breads and muffins, whole grain pasta dishes, and mashed potatoes on a regular basis. The kids can eat as much as they like of these things, along with as many beans (hummus is a huge favorite around here), nuts and nut butters, fresh and dried fruit and veggies as they want. The only carbs we don't allow on an unlimited basis are the junk food carbs (which often are not only processed carbs but also contain quite a bit of processed fat which is equally bad), but when they eat plenty of the good carbs they don't want so many of the bad ones. Since your son is very thin, he sounds like he needs a lot of calorie and nutrient dense foods which to me would be healthy fats like nuts and nut butters and whole grain flour products like banana nut muffins and that sort of thing. My kids never complain about eating foods like that. Hope you find what works best for you.

[Pinky Tuscadero]

I would definitely concentrate on healthy fats. Does he like PB & J? If so, you can mix coconut oil in the PB or other nut butter and not really affect the taste. Does he like meats? My boys will eat sausage every single day! We get some really good sausage from a local farm (no nitrates or anything bad) so I let them have as much as they want.
What about helping him build his appetite? Can you make him extra hungry by spending lots of time outside? Maybe he'll be more likely to eat good stuff if he's good and hungry?
I have no problem using a little chocolate to get lots of raw milk into my kids. One of them just doesn't like plain milk. I don't either so I can't really fault him for it. There are some relatively innocuos brands of chocolate syrup.
Do you have access to raw butter? I put lots of butter of their veggies. They are really into sweet potatoes right now. I slice them into discs and brush with coconut oil and butter, add some good salt and bake. They love them with some real maple syrup for dipping.
What else will he eat?

[gentlemango]

Thank you for your replies! Yes, we buy good carbs but not homemade. He eats whole wheat bread (store bought), ww blend pasta, blend tortillas, brown rice. But he's protein averse, or something. I can't get him to eat peanut butter, eggs, or meats other than nuggets (not my breaded nuggets) and fish sticks.

He does like cheerios so he eats raw milk with cheerios every morning. Oatmeal is a no go. I'm at a loss. I want to tip the balance away from the carbs and into more fats and proteins. I look at his protruding ribs and feel incredibly guilty for the choices I made when I was pregnant.

He also suffers from constipation. He is very pale but has no dark circles under his eyes. He displayed some developmental delays as a toddler that disappeared when I, in desperation, added cod liver oil to our (vegan) diet. Next I added raw milk. Then meats and other TF stuff, but maybe he never developed a taste for it? He never liked our vegan protein sources either though. :

[Pinky Tuscadero]

What about soup? If you can find a soup that he'll eat, you can hide almost anything in it. My kids love chicken soup.
Is there anything you could get him to eat with lots of raw butter on it? I think that's a really good fat for kids, and usually they like it. Any veggies? Sweet potatoes and squash are usually easy to get into kids cause they're so sweet. How about sweet potatoes fries? He could dip them in honey butter or maple syrup. Does he like fruit? Most kids like to eat fruit on a toothpick that they can dip in something, like yogurt or a nut buter and honey mixture. I've made chicken cubes cooked in a peanut sauce that the kids love to eat off toothpicks. They call it "appetizer dinner". I'll cube some kind of meat, cheese and some fruits and arrange it all pretty on a plate and give them some fancy toothpicks. They think it's totally cool.
How about a smoothie? You can mix milk, honey, cocnut oil/butter and whatever fruits he likes. You can really hide almost anything in it, even raw egg yolks!
I'll keep thinking...

[savithny]

Originally Posted by gentlemango

I'm at a loss. I want to tip the balance away from the carbs and into more fats and proteins. I look at his protruding ribs and feel incredibly guilty for the choices I made when I was pregnant.

I've got one skinny-minnie and one swervy-curvy kid, and I did not eat substantially differently with either, excepting that with one pregnancy my last trimester was spring/summer and I had the fruits of the local farmers market at my disposal. While I've dabbled back and forth with vegetarianism (not veganism) I wasn't veggie for either pregnancy, and did lots of milk/eggs/cheese both times. My kids are just very different children, with very different metabolisms. DS looks like my uncle, who is 6'4" and about 150#, while DD looks like my BIL - solid and muscular and rounded out. DD is 3.5 years younger and only about 10 pounds lighter at this point.

My skinny kid doesn't like most meat, hates cheese (milk and yogurt are okay) and would be fine on bread and olives with the occasional piece of grilled chicken.

Things that have worked well for him are hummus (loves it on pita and carrots), avocado (he'll snarf a bowl of guac if given the chance) and beans refried with lots of fat. The only way we get eggs into him is in French toast (make it VERY eggy) or mashed into a spread for bread (little does he know that the "butter" on his toast when we have Eggs Benedict is Hollandaise sauce). He loves olives and olive spread, and meatballs now (I make them in large batches and*bake/freeze. We've figured out over time that he likes his beef *very* cooked (texture issue) and now he'll eat small amounts of grilled steak wrapped in tortillas.

[JaneSmith1010]

I would say keep trying things until you find something high calorie and nutrient dense that he will eat consistently. For a long time that was avocado/banana pudding for my son. Also, sugary foods for kids will often displace healthy foods they need and drinking something like chocolate milk may make your son feel full--so you're getting pasteurized milk and alot of sugar but not really alot of the other stuff he needs. I'm just using that as an example and not trying to attack your food choices for your son. Maybe you could stick with staples that most kids like (real nut butter, raisins, bananas, etc.). to bulk him up and also give supplements to be sure he is not nutrient deficient (multi-vitamin, omega-oils).

Do you think this is related to an appetite problem as well as to pickiness? Hyperactive children, those on Ritalin, often have no appetitie. You could look for foods that stimulate appetite. Keep in mind GI disorders like celiac that would agitate his stomach, causing him to not want to eat, and that would contribute to wasting and prevent him from absorbing nutrients. I have CD and had wasting. I would crave sweets and wheat products like crazy. Just a thought.

[thedomesticdiva]

What about a chocolate milk smoothie - with coconut oil and a raw egg? or a little kefir?

I have to take tiny baby steps with my kids - I am shameless with my picky eater - I will tell him if he has two bites of so-and-so, then he can have his ________ (whatever he really likes).

Please do not feel too guilty about the pregnancy thing - being a mama is so full of guilt - just the fact that you are TRYING means he is better off than most kids.

My poor ds was always a little yellow until I finally convinced him to do shooters with OJ and codliver oil - now for the first time in six years, he has rosy cheeks!

He is more willing to try new things if he helps me cook them.

I say just keep trying - do not give up and one day your little guy will surprise you...

[thedomesticdiva]

Me again -
I have been trying to think about what helped rev up my ds' appetite - I think it was almost like he was used to being hungry, so he would never eat - He also had really bad yeast which made his belly HURT.

Anyway - what about beans or nuts - they both have protein - and you can put boiled eggs in just about anything without affecting the taste.

As I serve the plates of anything hot (like lasagna or chile), I always add coconut oil to my ds' plate because he never gets enough... And I still add extra fat to his plate - butter, cheese, or oil...

I just tried to make what he would eat from the best possible TF ingredients -

Roast chicken: my picky ds will eat the skin of two chicken and then ask for more - ugh but he LOVES it.

[gentlemango]

Originally Posted by jhow32000

Also, sugary foods for kids will often displace healthy foods they need and drinking something like chocolate milk may make your son feel full--so you're getting pasteurized milk and alot of sugar but not really alot of the other stuff he needs

That's the trap I'm afrarid I've fallen into. I use chocolate syrup as a way of getting raw milk into him, but i know it's not helping re train his palate to stop craving sugary things.

You could look for foods that stimulate appetite. Keep in mind GI disorders like celiac that would agitate his stomach, causing him to not want to eat, and that would contribute to wasting and prevent him from absorbing nutrients. I have CD and had wasting. I would crave sweets and wheat products like crazy. Just a thought.

A good thought! I will research that. It would make sense with his constipation issues and the carb addiction. He would eat buttered toast morning noon and night.

[JaneSmith1010]

Originally Posted by gentlemango

That's the trap I'm afrarid I've fallen into. I use chocolate syrup as a way of getting raw milk into him, but i know it's not helping re train his palate to stop craving sugary things.



A good thought! I will research that. It would make sense with his constipation issues and the carb addiction. He would eat buttered toast morning noon and night.

Hey at least you are getting some raw milk in there! I agree that you should sneak in some oil and butter to whatever you can. My little guy is a challenge already, not in how picky he is but in how little he will eat. A chocolate milk smoothie is a great idea. my baby loves nut butter balls with coconut and raisins. is your son partial to any particular foods other than wheat products?

[karne]

My ds has become VERY picky recently, and is truly on the skinny side, so I hear you! It's a struggle because he is the only picky one in the family. I find that at 5, a lot in the world is more interesting than eating for him, so just keeping him at the table is a struggle. Also, he too is a (raw) milk, cow or goat, drinker, really craves it, and I actually suspect there may be an allergy there (red cheeks, fine rash after drinking). But I digress!

We have had great luck with smoothies in the AM, bananna, CLO, yogurt. Also toasted raw cheese on whole grain bread. For some reason cut up pears became a favorite yesterday, so we're on to pears dipped in honey. I cannot say enough about hummus, and anything to do with avacado. I slice up the avacado in half, and it is an avacado "boat". Hard boiled eggs are OK right now, and cubed chicken and some fish. Whew, It's not so bad when I write it down! Good luck-:

[gentlemango]

Originally Posted by savithny

I've got one skinny-minnie and one swervy-curvy kid, and I did not eat substantially differently with either

Thank you for your kind words.

When researching my son's developmental delays and the brain's need for DHA, which led to me stumbling on Price's research, what hit me right in the stomach was the description of facial bone structure among the non TF children.

Have you ever seen the CNN news reporter Dana Bash? Very skinny chin, like she has this skeletal "horsey" look to her face. That is my son's profile. High forehead, delicate facial features, very narrow chin and jaw.

[desertpenguin]

Originally Posted by gentlemango

That's the trap I'm afrarid I've fallen into. I use chocolate syrup as a way of getting raw milk into him, but i know it's not helping re train his palate to stop craving sugary things.



A good thought! I will research that. It would make sense with his constipation issues and the carb addiction. He would eat buttered toast morning noon and night.

you could try gradually using less and less chocolate syrup. you could also try using blackstrap molasses alone or in combination with a smaller amount of chocolate syrup, since b. molasses is a good source of some minerals and such.

food intolerances and sensitivities-you could try switching to gluten free bread and just see if he does any better with that. the store bought gf breads in the freezer section are decent, the kind that is shelf stable isn't all that great, but is palatable enough for some people if heated...homemade is best, especially since you can control ingredients and find a recipe that is closer to regular ww sandwich bread. tinkyada brand pasta is a very good rice pasta. you can also make gf corn tortillas or rice or rice/bean blend tortillas. hth.

[gentlemango]

Originally Posted by desertpenguin

you could try gradually using less and less chocolate syrup. you could also try using blackstrap molasses alone or in combination with a smaller amount of chocolate syrup, since b. molasses is a good source of some minerals and such.

I never thought of that! Thank you!

[Wugmama]

Great thread, subbing.

[Alyantavid]

My 6 year old is very skinny too. He's also allergic to dairy so all those options are out. But he loves beans, in any way, shape or form so he gets those alot. And as weird as it sounds he loves cauliflower with butter. Raw or cooked, he doesn't care, but he'll eat tons of it. We also do alot of roasted potatoes with spices and olive oil, my boys both love those. My kid loves tomato soup too so I make that in the crockpot and add all kinds of stuff, then puree and he scarfs it down. As much as I'd like them to, neither one wants anything to do with avocadoes or hummus, but those are great options.

[momma4fun]

I would look into supplements, sometimes a deficiency in zinc, for instance, can cause an aversion to protein and fat.

Maybe you could experiment with finding a recipe for a fermented beverage or veggie that he will LOVE. These could really stimulate his appetite, so if you found something he loved you could offer it to him a half hour before a meal and see if he eats more at the meal.

I think probably the most important thing would be to heal his digestive system. Get good bacteria in him like crazy -- put chocolate syrup on homemade or plain yogurt even, and give it to him as a first course, every meal and snack. You could ask your doctor for a prescription probiotic. You could look online, at radiant life I think, they have a great probiotic for babies/young children. If he's not used to digesting meat and fat, he'll have a hard time with it.

I think eggs are probably the most easily digested protein. Start out small, like mixing a tiny bit of scrambled eggs in with his spaghetti or whatever his favorite dinner is? Like burritos or tacos maybe. Small amounts of ground meat (even just a tablespoon) could hide pretty easy too, and if you just mix a bit of the raw ground meat in with a steaming hot bowl of food, you could be sure that the meat wouldn't overcook, at which point it would be rubbery and more noticable.

Does he like sushi?

[Unconventional1]

Does your son eat veggies? In the main nutrition thread a poster talked about how they crave chocolate all the time. Another poster mentioned how it is very high in magnesium, which you need to have enough of to properly use calcium. So maybe your son is getting plenty of calcium, and not enough magnesium, so he is craving the chocolate to balance out the milk? Veggies are high in magnesium, but also relatively high in calcium as well. You could try a supplement, or you could buy some high quality. organic dark chocolate and melt it and add it to your son's mil in a blender (dark chocolate melts at very low temps, so it wouldn't really heat up the milk).

My favorite thing when I was a raw foodie (not vegan) was to take my raw milk and add: yogurt, strawberries or blueberries, agave, and an egg yolk or two and blend it up- you can't taste the egg, the agave doesn't support candida growth, and it is very yummy and fairly fatty- I now make it with clo, and sometimes with some soft butter to fatten it up as well as have all kinds of good nutrients together.

Maybe you could make a chocolate version of that too?

Does your son like to help you cook? Maybe you could get him involved in what he is making to help him be more interested.

Peanut butter cookies have a good amount of protein. I haven't looked at sprouted bread recently, but I bet some are higher in protein (with the seeds and nuts that they have) than typical breads- I also like Rudy's ancient grain spelt that has lots of nuts and seed in it.

I will keep thinking on this one...

[gentlemango]

Thank you all, please keep them coming! Great ideas.