What time does your 13 yr old go to bed?

[K&JsMaMa]

We (13 yr old, dh and I) decided that 9:30pm was a reasonable time for him to go to bed.

He fights me EVERY....SINGLE.....NIGHT!!! I'm so sick of it. This is the time HE decided on for God's sake!

Now he's saying he wants 9:45pm since he's "older"!

So, I'm curious what time your 13 yr old goes to bed? And does he/she fight you on it nightly?

[JustOneMore]

My 'almost' 13 year old goes to bed at 8:30PM. She doesnt fight me, its just always been that way. I think deep down, she knows that her body needs that much sleep and she's cool with it.

We've always had them on a pretty regular schedule with dinner, baths and winddown time. Our younger boys go to bed between 7:30 and 8 so that gives her some winddown time without them under her feet and she understands that after 8:30pm is 'mom and dad' time.

[UnschoolnMa]

My kids don't have a bedtime. We talk a lot about sleep needs, and etc.

My Dd is 14 and she goes to bed around midnight usually...give or take. My son is going on 17 and he stays up much later. Later than me usually even.

I think 8:30 or 9 is pretty early for a teen. I think it's pretty wise to consider their POV on this. It feels good to be taken seriously.

[hellyaellen]

i don't have a 13 year old but my 8 yr old is usually up until 10 or so. (of course i work nights so i let her stay up later trhan is really optimal just so we can have some together time)

when i was a 13yr old i went to bed around 10 or 11 i guess except on saturadys. then i had to stay up until 3am watching headbangers ball.

some people are wired to stay up late. i'd try a later bedtime in your case. at least see how it goes.

[moms angels]

Our 14 year old goes to sleep at 9, sometimes 9:30 - 10 if she had a lot of homework & needs some wind down time or there's a special show on we've been waiting to watch together. Weekends it's 11 unless she's having a sleepover, then it's usually around 1am. She's pretty smart at sensing when she should head off to bed.

[ziggy]

I never had a bed time growing up, but I'd usually head to bed around 10 or so, and I'd shoe the younger ones (5 and 6.5 years younger than me) off to bed around 8 or whenever they got cranky. I still head to bed between 10 and 12 and I think my little brother still keeps his bed time that I arbitrarily set for him when he was in 7th grade. He's a high school sophomore now and if I call after 9 he's grumpy.

[slymamato3]

My 14y/o DD goes up to her room to read at around 7:30ish. She probably reads for an hour or so. She has to be up at 5 to be ready for the bus @ 6:30.
She knows how much sleep she needs to function so she decides what works for her.

[mmace]

Mine is 14 - she heads up to bed around 9:00 every night, then reads until 9:30 or so usually. She is up at 6:00 on school mornings.

We are all sleepers in this house though - my almost 10 year old is in bed at 7:30 and up at 6:20, my almost 5 year old is in bed at 7:00 and up at 7:00, and I usually try to turn my light out around 10:00 and my alarm goes off at 5:45.

[kblackstone444]

My son (age 12) goes to bed at ten, but he often doesn't actually fall asleep until 11 or 11:30. He just needs that time to wind down. My little girl (age 7), goes to bed between 8:30 and 9. The go to bed later if they're not tired, on nights when there's no school the next day.

[kennedy444]

My 13, almost 14 yo dd goes to bed between 10 and 11pm, usually much later on Friday and Saturday nights. I just think teen body clocks are changing and they just aren't tired until then. Of course, they like to sleep so much later and for those going to school, that just isn't possible. On Saturdays my dd sleeps in until 11am or Noon.

On school nights my 11 yo ds goes to bed between 9-10pm, depending when he feels tired. Some nights he reads for awhile.

They both get up at 6:30am-6:45am to get ready for school.

When they were younger we had a good bedtime routine and I think they just really are tuned into when they feel tired and want to go to bed.

The three yo is another whole story.....

[K&JsMaMa]

Thank you all so much for your replies.

It looks like I'm being a bit too controlling with him. I'll talk to DH and see if we can loosen things up a bit.

Thanks again.

[Ruthla]

My 13yo doesn't have a bedtime. She's plenty mature enough to know what time she needs to get to bed at night to wake up well rested the next morning- or to deal with the consequences (being tired all day) if she gets to bed too late. She generally goes to bed between 10:00 and 11:00 PM.

I think I stopped having formal bedtimes for my girls when they were around 9 or 10 or so? Whenever they were mature enough to handle getting up in the mornings without my insisting on a specific bedtime the night before.

My 6yo isn't mature enough to handle that. He gets overtired and doesnt' realize he's sleepy, and if he gets too bed to late he's a monster in the mornings. But he's only 6 and a Mommy-enforced bedtime is appropriate for him. I can't imagine micro-managing a teenager in the same way.

[Emzachsmama]

My 13 yr dd's bedtime is 9:30 on school nights and no set bedtime on non-school nights. But even on non-school nights she has to be in her room at 11:00. She doesn't have to go to sleep, she can watch a movie or read a book or something, but after 11 is mom and dad time - otherwise we'd never get much time to ourselves.

[Alkenny]

I have a 12 1/2 year old and an almost 15 year old and they both go to bed around 9'ish during the week, with no bedtime on the weekends. Sometimes they go to bed before that, sometimes they stay up all night.

[mykdsmomy]

DD13 has no bedtime.....she goes to sleep when she's ready. We homeschool so she doesnt have to get up at a specific time. She's not a morning person (like her mama )

[SJane01]

Originally Posted by K&JsMaMa

We (13 yr old, dh and I) decided that 9:30pm was a reasonable time for him to go to bed.

He fights me EVERY....SINGLE.....NIGHT!!! I'm so sick of it. This is the time HE decided on for God's sake!

Now he's saying he wants 9:45pm since he's "older"!

So, I'm curious what time your 13 yr old goes to bed? And does he/she fight you on it nightly?

our 14yo DS went to bed at 9:30 for the two weeks before school started and first two week of school the past 3 years (since he was 11). Its 10pm after the first two weeks of school.

The past 2 years, we have allowed him to go to sleep whenever he wants, as long as he's undressed, showered (he still takes baths) and IN BED by 10.

He's allowed to have his laptop with him in bed until 11, but we dont enforce this because we are generally in bed by 11. the rules are if he wants to read or such past 11, he can but no tv or electronics past 11.

If we have problems getting him up in the morning we take away the late night privs. He goes to bed at 10 and its lights out & laptop off at 10 for 2 weeks. We've not had a problem with this in a long time, however.

[BedHead]

10:30 pm was her 'bedtime' last year when she was 13 (still is). I use the term loosely because that's usually when she starts getting ready for bed and she doesn't actually GET to bed for another 30-60 minutes. She still never goes to sleep before 11:30, no matter what time she goes to bed. But if she's tired she's been known to just go to bed on her own by 9 pm.

No set bedtime on weekends. She sleeps for about 10 hours a night left to her own devices.

[sagewinna]

My 14 year old DS goes to bed at 9:15 and is out like a light by 9:30. He is naturally an early riser, and he gets migraines if he doesn't get enough sleep.

[Pancakes]

Our kids have to go to bed at 8:30. They are allowed to stay up as late as they want so long as they are doing something quiet in their room. DS immediately goes to sleep, but DD is up till midnight reading.

My only condition for them being in charge of their own bed time...is that I am in charge of what time they wake up. Several days of 6am wake ups, gets the kids to appreciate an earlier bedtime

[canadianchick]

My almost 12 yr old goes to bed at 10ish and sometimes gives me a hard time but truthfully, I think it is just for the sake of giving me a hard time. We stay up late on the weekends and last weekend did not go to bed one night until after 1 am.